Serious question

Aiden Bailey
Aiden Bailey

Serious question. How does a male gain confidence and self-esteem? I earned a good education, I workout, eat healthy, try to be assertive (it's hard as fuck for me), dress nice and do my best to man-scape/groom, have friends and colleagues who like me.....yet I still feel so beneath everyone else. I'm not confident/good at anything. I don't feel valuable. I don't feel like I'll ever be the type of person who gets choice in life; that'll I'll just have to continue accepting leftovers.

The only thing I suppose that's missing is a girl/sex, but from every bit of advice I hear is that it won't fundamentally change anything, and I tend to agree.

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Easton Garcia
Easton Garcia

I dropped out of high school, never been to a gym, never worked a day in my life, eat taco bell and candy every day, wear the same clothes every day, yet I'm very confident and feel like I'm smarter than everyone.

Nathan Torres
Nathan Torres

kill your ego
it only holds you back
because you are

Brayden Hall
Brayden Hall

most people do not have confidence and self esteem in every area of life, they are confident in some areas and not in others.
have you ever met a person who says he can do something, but when the time comes to do that thing he has no clue what he's doing and fucks it up? you don't want to be that guy, that guy is just a moron. he was lying to himself and everyone else.
you need to have something to back up your confidence. if you don't have something to back it up then you have nothing to go on and just need to try it and understand that you will either be bad, mediocre, or good at it. that's all you can do. you might get better, you might not.

Carter Hill
Carter Hill

this was me before the shattering realization that it was all delusion. I hate to use the word "cope" after it's lost all meaning here, but it may in fact be a cope

if you genuinely don't give a shit good on you though

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Chase Wilson
Chase Wilson

Every word written here came straight from your ass.
most people
Ya okay

Ryder Johnson
Ryder Johnson

kill your ego
I mean, I wouldn't say I have an ego, but I suppose anyone with an ego will say that. I don't consider myself better or more deserving than other people, but I also don't think it's egotistical to want to feel good about yourself, or be good at at least one thing in life....i just don't know.

I definitely don't want to be that guy. In fact, I often tell people that I'm not knowledgable enough thing X to be able to help. But like you said, I do need something to backup my confidence, but I have nothing. No matter what I do I can't become really good at any aspect of life.

James Allen
James Allen

yep, most people are not confident at everything. go ask some random person to make a speech in front of 10,000 people and watch them shit their pants.
i think you're a fake it til you make it person and you have nothing to back up your confidence, and thats why you're pissed

Andrew Gonzalez
Andrew Gonzalez

Stuff like this is learned, not taught. Dig inwardly and don't stop.

Aaron Sanchez
Aaron Sanchez

women destroy every bit of it during my entire life.
I dont give a fuck what my friends say, females are just not interested in what i have to offer.
Im no longer going to try it anymore.
I will become a volcel and see how far i go before an hero.

Eli White
Eli White

Try to get as close as possible to wes watsons physique. You won't even realize it, but when you're jacked you no longer have apprehensions about "imposing your will" on the world and the people around you. If you wanna interject on a conversation, or take up space, etc etc you'll do it without thinking because there aren't going to be a lot of dudes that will stand up to you unless they're even bigger than you. thats what i know

Wyatt Garcia
Wyatt Garcia

Hey buddy, you're an asshole, guy. Nobody wants that, man.

Josiah Foster
Josiah Foster

This isn't actually wrong. Only problem is I can't be in the gym 3 hours a day 7 days a week, and eat two full chickens a day.

Thomas Cooper
Thomas Cooper

you totally give off serial killer vibes

Jordan Hill
Jordan Hill

testing oreganically

Carson Sanders
Carson Sanders

This isn't actually wrong
yes it is.
holy shit this world has become so fucking retarded.
Why in the fuck do you think going around being a total douche would make you or anyone else around you happy?
inb4 but that's what le alpha chads do!
no, they don't. that's what pissant little frat bros do and no one cares about them except for the equally retarded sorority sluts.
Step into the real world for fuck's sake. People don't actually like assholes.
inb4 but user you're being an asshole
but I'm not being an asshole for the sake of being an asshole. this is where you fuckers get everything wrong. stop doing shit for the sake of power or some weird game that you play, just be a fucking human being.
Holy shit.

Anthony Rivera
Anthony Rivera

unironically, just be confident, it's just a state of mind, you can be a ceo and be anxious and be a homeless and be confident, it's up to you bud

Henry Lopez
Henry Lopez

You had me up until "just be a fucking human being" lol. That statement doesn't have much substance, but, I think I get what you mean.

As for your other comments about not being a douche and stuff, I totally agree. My take though is that if you have big muscles and are physically imposing and strong, it just gives you that base of confidence. I certainly wouldn't go around being a douche all the time, but I'd still know in my head that if I needed to be a douche, or needed to physical best someone, I could.

Gavin Butler
Gavin Butler

that's just balloon confidence though, the moment someone says something hurtful to you it'll pop like a balloon that was poked with a needle
real confidence is when you can be a skinny midget and nothing ever can dent it

Justin Cox
Justin Cox

By having a healthy family
Loving yourself is about accepting your 2 sides which are mom's and dad's
If parents can't live in peace together the 2 parts inside you won't either. That's why selfhating betas mostly come from single parents

I came to that conclusion

Luke Myers
Luke Myers

that's coddling, of course you didn't have a happy childhood if your parents weren't together for some reason, and if oyu didn't have a happy childhood then of course you weren't coddled
that's gonna pop too if you can't rely on someone like family members to coddle you, you gonna be really confident when you have people to rely on but if you're ever alone then you gonna kill yourself, it happens all the time

Xavier Mitchell
Xavier Mitchell

I'm talking about accepting yourself, not fucking coddling
You basically only have to love both of your parents to love yourself
It's not about how you were raised

Jose Thompson
Jose Thompson

if your parents were abusive then of course you didn't love them, you're talking about coddling, you "accepting yourself" is extremely dependent on others accepting you, sure it works as you have people that love you but if you lose that then you're fucked

Benjamin Garcia
Benjamin Garcia

If you're self confident you don't relate yourself to the word self confidence. You just do what you do.
That means that as long as you try to be self confident you won't be.
Watch this. Not that I agree with everything he says but he's a great place to start.
youtube.com/watch?v=8tS4LRDm7Ts
Don't even reply to your thread again without having watched this or your mother dies in her sleep tonight.

Landon Morris
Landon Morris

you "accepting yourself" is extremely dependent on others accepting you
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
No it isn't. Read a fucking book.