Trannies and manchildren. I am back to sell you some more goods for a reasonable price. Hurry up, the supplies are limited!
Gay Away (3 Banter Coins) (6 in Stock) - Having problems with gayposters? You think you're gonna become gay against your will? Well not anymore! With these revolutionary pills manufactured by the all time famous Plague Doctor himself from his prison cell, The Gay will just go away! Warning: May cause severe brain damage and erectile dysfunction.
Sarma (4 Banter Coins) (12 in Stock) - Westerners call them cabbage rolls, but THAT'S NOT TRUE!
Explosive Juice (15 Banter Coins) (3 in Stock) - These used to be regular bottles of soda until some dipshit started shaking them all violently. Now I've raised the price of them and started selling them as bombs.
Alice Plush Toy [PROMOTIONAL ITEM!] (Free) (19 in Stock) - Homemade plush toys of the symbol of Serbia. Please do not lewd the plush toys. Find the real thing for that.
Accordion [SPECIAL OFFER!] (500 Banter Coins) (Sold Out) - It's an accordion, but not any accordion. It's THE accordion used in all the Serbian war songs. Probably the only item that's not shit.
''Kupujte ili idite u tri lepe pičke materine!'' ~The Serb Merchant
Listen, you have all the items on the shelves behind me. Just ask for the items that are available or don't waste my time. I have an anti frog gun prepared and if you don't tell me what you want in 30 seconds, I'm gonna shoot you. So, choose wisely, u pičku materinu!
Camden Evans
>Sarma Could I please take 4 for home? And preferably a small Serbian man to cook Sausage and Sarma every Wednesday?
It has the same value as US Dollars. I don't really know currency other than counting it and buying things with it.
Well, I do have a special limited edition Cirno Plushie reserved for the 100th customer.
Tyler Garcia
How many times to I have to say this?! The Albanian Merchant sells disembodied boobs.
Nolan King
I'd like one Alice Plush Toy please
Jack Jackson
Oh, so you are not hiding “it”?
How long until the 100th costumer btw?
Jose Rodriguez
Alright. Here ya go! Just... ignore the creepy whispering inside the plushie. It's probably nothing.
We currently have 4 customers served. Sooo... that's a very long way to 100.
Asher Nguyen
I too would like the Alice toy, I need it for “it”....
Aaron Gomez
[Raises eyebrow] ''It''? You don't mean to lewd it, do you?
Ian Bailey
yes, ill have one of everything, could i get something extra for buying all this shit?
Mason Ramirez
Well, I do have an... errr... an old piece of cabbage from under the counter for buying every item on the shelf! That will be 22 Banter Coins + Alice Plush Toy and a piece of cabbage. Enjoy!
Brandon Flores
thank you my good sir, and here is a little bit extra for the trouble *throws you 4 banter coins*
Tyler Scott
Thank you! [Puts the money in the small, rusty safe]
Samuel Stewart
Well, time to quality control the sarma.
Blake Harris
Okay, I'm back. Still no customers?
Wyatt Hernandez
Alright, closing the shop. Today's been better than yesterday.
Safe = 45 Banter Coins
Total Customers Served = 6
Isaiah Howard
Alright, QUICK SALE! Every item is 50% off until next closure.
David Gonzalez
alright, ill have one of each (once again), and a juicy tip of 9 banter coins (for you).
Mason Smith
That will be 11 Banter Coins. And thank you for the tip. Appreciate it. I can finally pay the bills.
Tyler Campbell
now, what the fuck am i gonna do with all of this shit? *envisions doing random shit to people with the merchandise*
Cameron Cox
I suggest eating the sarma. It's getting cold.
Jace Murphy
nah, ill freeze it and chuck it into an occupied bathroom stall.
Liam Phillips
That can also work. I also suggest putting the explosive juice into the plushies and giving them to orphans. It will totally surprise them.
Easton Lewis
hey, now thats a good suggestion, or maybe ill just give them out to some random weebs.
Christopher Hill
Tohou fans will swarm at them like vultures at a dead skunk.
Robert Mitchell
How about you make Yugoslav one and we call it a day?
Levi Richardson
Sooo... you mean change my name to The Yugoslav Merchant orrr...?
Jose Evans
Well, it's closing time. I've really made some cash this time.
Nolan Wilson
thanks, the whispering would be a nice bonus.
Brayden Walker
Please stock up on some more Alice dolls, I need them