Drink coffee

>drink coffee
>have to poop
masterrace reporting in

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>don't drink coffee
>still need to poop
Shut the fuck up retarded incel

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I'm right there with you

stay mad, coffeelet

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>only 30% of coffee drinkers need to push out a big ol' log after a cup
feels good man

>drink alcohol
>intestines violently send everything down faster than I can poop it, giving me stomache cramps as I sprint for the bathroom
>vow to never drink again
>drink again in a few days

Get on my level.

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Are u even trying?

>Take opiates
>Don't shit in 4 days
>Shit a dryass pinecone that leaves bloodstains

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makes me glad I'm not a filthy degenerate

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Alcohol gives me diarrhea too; any idea why?

>be lactose intollerant
>drink a full bottle of milk
>same shit happen
>same vow
Now what

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But being a degenerate has its percs™

god is displeased with the act of drinking alcohol, so he smites your bowels

i meant like medically, but ill keep that explanation in mind if i can't figure it out

Same for the milk i guess, your body can't process it and start using water to get alcol the fuck outta your body the fastest way possible

But then why doesn't that happen to everyone when they drink alcohol

What condition do i have that makes me intolerant to it? Am i allergic to tannin or something?

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Dunno, but it's not allergic, but it's a good thing, if your body can't absorb it, it doesn't damage you,

See it's a weird feel. I drink coffee all day but also take kratom all day and roxie routinely. I go to the bathroom needing to shit and just sit there unless it's been 5 or 6 hours since

I guess that makes sense

You're probably right about my body not properly absorbing it, because it takes a lot of alcohol to get me drunk

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#YOLO
Mixin alcohol and caffeine. Lets see how my body likes it this way.

You are a man of taste as well. The body can fuck off. I want what I want.

Jesus drank wine. Alcohol is God-approved.

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>Epic Games Launcher
YO BRUH PLEY SOME FUKKEN FORTNITE N DAB ON EMMMM

I prefer UT over fortnite, but I do play it some.

What happened lad, are you alive?

Combining these two drugs has granted me unlimited power! BYAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! my bowels remain strong for now.

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