CASUAL DRESS CODE

gross
and they work for Capital One

FEET

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>that 12 year old boomer with erectile dysfunction

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no thanks, already had roast beef this month at arbys

so many sickos

I'm going to qualify this first by saying I AM A FUCKING MAN. You cannot argue with me or lie to me like you do with the women you sexually harass because

I. AM. A. MAN.
I. KNOW. WHAT. YOU'RE. DOING.

So lets cut the shit, shall we? You know the truth, I know the truth. If you have an erection in public YOU'RE FUCKING DOING IT ON PURPOSE AND YOU SHOULD BE IN PRISON.

There's this myth that men can't control their boners. and yet we all do! It's not that fucking hard. You can control your breathing, your bladder, you can avoid scratching an itch and yeah YOU CAN CONTROL YOUR GOD DAMN ERECTION. The fact is men have just as much control over their erection as they do over their bowels. Much more, in fact. Are involuntary erections possible? yeah maybe, like how once in a while you shit your pants, but 99% of time it's sexual harassment.

This is bait.
If not, please fucking teach me how to hide it, because it's awkward as fuck

>NSFW
I'm browsing this while at work

THROW AWAY THE KEY

is this pasta

What, are you fucking 80? I still get random boners when I'm not even thinking about sex or even consciously horny at 29.

It is now kek

Step 1) STOP HAVING AN ERECTION

You know how can you twitch your dick muscles? STOP.

Step 2) Stop acting dumb. You know exactly what you're doing you fucking sicko. "how do I hide it" SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU DISINGENUOUS PIECE OF SHIT. JUST STOP BEING A FUCKING PERVERT. STOP.

Nice pasta

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i have a boner looking at any moderately attractive woman and im mid 30's who has frequent sex with his wife. Sorry about your ED.

Jesus Christ maximum kek

Sorry dude not every has been trained to have to look at sissy hypno porn like you to get a boner

lol, your testosterone level is probably -200

Congratulations, you played yourself.

Shut the fuck up, Hans. Even your manliest men sound like 12 year old boys with your girly accent

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you forgot that this isnt a german company who needs a new set of furniture, because unwashed obese americans have "marked" everything with brown sweaty lines.

Humans learn by what situations you should get turned on during puberty. If just seeing a woman gives you a boner you are an immature animal and should seek therapy

Random boner ≠ boner because you saw a boob

What the fuck is sissy hypno porn

>macbook pro on your naked legs
it's like you want to get burned

t. basedboy

Go back to /v/ kiddo

>tfw exhibitionism fetish

If girls are going to come into work nude not giving a fuck about who sees them then I'm going to get an erection

There's nothing wrong with being gay, user

>April 9, 2015
It was a different time

>i am a man
>men can controll boners
No. Female to male tranoes are not men. You never had dick. You will never have it. And you have no clue how it works. No, your blow up prostetic is not dick (spoiler alert - men don't need to use pumps hidden in balls yo get errection)

>If just seeing a woman gives you a boner
Then he is a healthy male ready for action at any time and without the quick-limp syndrome.
Your impotent limpness is your own problem.
Don't try to paint other people's healthiness as a problem just because you suffer from one.

> Are involuntary erections possible?
Yep, but you are too fat.

>all these limpdick soÿcucks trying to pass of their impotence and low self-esteem as virtue
ALMIGHTY KEK

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>Random boner ≠ boner because you saw a boob
By saying boners are completely active actions you won't perform if you don't actively want to, there shouldn't be any openings for random boners within your head canon. Random boners are just as passive as regular boners.

yes this is an april fools joke
jessicasaia.com/working-naked/

imagine looking at the hottie writing on the table and getting a boner then you need to look at the ugly fatty to go soft again

You are literally hardwired to pop a boner when you see a naked woman. If you unironically look at hot naked women and don't even get a semi you need to check your test you onions guzzling cuck

>dick muscules
wtf am i reading?

i only look at naked women ironically and get ironic boners

>t. Soya Lord

>t. people whove never spent time on a beach
how disconnected from reality are you basement dwellers?

>too onions to dick bench 450lbs

I don't understand what this means
What does a dunecoon have anything to do with this?

Imagine the smell and god forbid anyone ended up having to go take a shit that day.

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In civilization, people wash their butts after take a dump.

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Europe isn't civilization and these people are in the Bay Area so I doubt they have Bidet's in their office.

>Europe isn't civilization
Name something closer to civilized people than an average European.

Canada, Japan, South Korea. Europe is a growing shithole of pajeets and Muhammads. Also baby wipes > bidets.

Why are all the guys tattooed?

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Tattoos where a big thing a decade ago.

You won't get burned from browsing facebook.

>Canada, Japan, South Korea
how about visiting even one of the countries and then visiting central Europe before posting something entirely wrong?
>Also baby wipes > bidets
baby wipes are unhealthy for your asshole. it destroys the sensible skin around it over a period of time.
its still okay to use it as an emergency.
but frequent use over a longer timeperiod leads to a proctologist visit.
so bidet > wipes

Id say it was big 5-6 years ago, thats when everyone and their fucking dog got one

I wear jeans and a tshirt, I'm comfy.
Also fuck that, too many fatties where I work.

Yeah, i remember some 11yo kids with tribal tattoos...
The cringiest thing where the blacks also doing tattoos, no one could see shit.

The women HR probably did this so they could fire the male workers with smell dicks, or at the very least, see who was packing and all the office whores took turns on them.

I bet you get a boner at the strip club you fucking faggot

samefag

ummm, no sweetie
please try again

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I didn't say boners are voluntary. There is a difference between getting one randomly and because you got turned on. The case I'm making is not so much about the erection (which is a result) but more about getting turned on enough to get a boner by just seeing a goddamn boob

Tell that to my junior high self. I had to hold my backpack over my dick and think about wrinkly elderly people rubbing their wrinkles together to calm the fucker down because of the black tights the girls across from me would wear in class.

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dumb phoneposter

Its funny because sometimes I could see a boob and pop a semi and sometimes not. It depends on your mood I think, But I still get a random one every now and then.
>ummm, no sweetie
Are you a 40 yr old mother? Who even says that?

FYI heaps of dudes get boners in a strip club, not just the virgins and pervs. That's one of the few places it's not a big deal.

>California
>San Fransisco
>MacBooks
>disgusting startup office that isn't even clean or fully furnished
>Beats
This is literally fucking disgusting. What do these people make yearly? Do they even get money or do they just get their disgusting feelings crushed when it inevitably fails? Also, what the fuck do they even do? I'm so fucking glad I have my cubicle at work and I don't work with a bunch of sissies

These are amerimutt puritan prudes who have been conditioned to make the association NUDITY → SEX, no matter the situation. Retards.

>Imagine the smell

How people manage to go to nude beaches I don't know.

Nudity is a natural thing. Sex is a natural thing. Infact, sex is possibly the most natural thing that exists. So why is sex such a taboo in the western civilization?

Sex is unnatural thing

Just a small tip that baby wipes shouldn't be flushed down the toilet. I've learned this the hard way.

4u.

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>the blonde's booty dimples

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How the fuck do you even get anything done in an "open office?"

The beach is outdoors and has plenty of air circulating. You won't have many issues with people's BO there. An office is indoors in a confined area; if people smell bad, you're going to notice right away.

easy:
take a shit at home, hotel, camping place
clean yourself
go to fkk beach
swim, eat, drink something, take a piss, swim again, just have fun
shower when you are home

this is not a small building where people work 8 to 10 hours every day and sit with they dirty asses on the same chair.
its outside.

Americans don't have the control of their sphincter. They try to hide it with memes like poo in loo.

>Who even says that?
anyone who wants to trigger autists like you

>Are you a 40 yr old mother? Who even says that?
It's a epic brand new meme

american education everyone

Do you think people gave each other a quick fondle if they were alone together?

Look at those women, how the fuck could you get a boner from that shit?

No, even a 12 year old knows when it's time to get horny and when to not.. He's obviously ab over-hormonal animal like the gypsies/turks/muslims/arabs/jews/ that's why they breed so much without stop.

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This is why in your autistic shithole of a gipsy region they don't allow beaches and nude beaches. You are too mentally retarded to control your hormones. Normally you get attracted consciously by romance and flirting rather than subconsciously by skin and jolting your ugly ass around.

God the things I'd do to you redditors/furries/trailer trash/basement dwellers if I was ever in charge of Jow Forums.
You're lucky to have Hiroshima. I'd genuinely plant CP just to call the cops in order to kick you off the website. So I can finally have my high-end "Intelligent people pretending to be idiots" community.
At this point I wouldn't destroy /b/, I'd torture it for the cancer they've created. And I'd slap /a/'s elitistic little face harder than a spoiled kid to remind them where their place is. "I was here first, Jow Forums is an anime messageboard" on your father's grave /a/.

The betaest of posts has been witnessed

Please just end yourself with a Smith & Wesson already

>Dick muscles
Wanna know how I know you're a roastie?

>You know how can you twitch your dick muscles?
no, because dicks don't have muscles in them

complaining about anime is peak reddit

>men have as much control over boners as their bowels
>immediately shit my pants

I think I must be the only faggot on this entire board that gets turned off by skin. I get turned on seeing people wearing skin-tight clothes over shapely bodies, but the actual skin and color of the skin turns me off and unfortunately so does rubbing off skin on skin.

/a/ is still a shit board.

>Step 1) STOP HAVING AN ERECTION
t. not a man
it's not that easy, once the idea of sex has entered your subconscious mind, it can be difficult to distract yourself from it, and it's not easy to 'stop having an erection' once you have one, you can't just drop it like you would drop an arm, it's not a limb

too obvious