This is Grandma Mary

You can browse the web safely with it. You can neglect updates for years at a time and still have a reasonably secure system. It's stable, it has modern browsers, email clients, office software, and photo viewers to see images of grandkids.

Old people basically live in their web browsers, so Linux is perfect for them.

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swallow my cock, granny.

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>Immune to 99.99% of viruses.
"What's a virus? Where is the .01%? Is it contagious? I have hip problems you know."
>You can update it whenever you want to (probably never).
"Update? What? Do I have to buy a new computer?"
>Windows 10 will slow down over time. Linux Mint won't.
"Ten windows are slow? What's my old friend Linda cooking with mint now? I thought she passed away in 96?"
>Doesn't need a fucking Ultron to not lag YouTube.
"Watch your mouth sonny, I didn't buy you those Transformer toys just so you can be a potty mouth."
>Easier to use because of more intuitive interface (yes, you've heard me).
"What is 'drag and drop'?" (pushes mouse against mouse pad, lifts up mouse and drops on desk)
>Never crashes, rock solid (do not even attempt to bring "loonix have no drivers" bullshit).
"How do you turn it on?"
>Doesn't spy on you.
"The commies are still spying on me? No more computers for me or you."
>No ads.
"But how will I order that nice bolo tie on the shopping channel?"
>It has all the programs you need and they work far better than on Windows 10.
"Does it have the Blue teeth?"

I never believe these mythical fairy tales of convincing an old person to use Linux, much less barely operate a Windows computer.

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Why? On all levels... why the fuck would she care about Linux or "muh botnet" or anything related?

maybe she is scared of updates and bluescreens. linux doesnt have those features.

Grandma this lets me remote in and fix your mistakes!!!

>can’t use a computer
>can’t use windows for that matter
This is a pointless thread, you can hand her any OS and she’ll be riddled with problems. What does she use the computer for anyway? Get her a chromebook and a jitterbug, call it a day.
Never ever do this unless you like getting called to fix shit like “I don’t understand double click”

>Never ever do this unless you like getting called to fix shit like “I don’t understand double click
Grandma you faggot! I told you how to use vim without the mouse!

Someone post the meme of KDE lacking a calculator but it's built into krunner so grandma can accidentally rm -rf /

INSTALL GENTOO

>grandma
>probably sixty
>has had a computer for 20 years already.
user, do you think this is the 90's still?

Why would I even try to convince people like that to use Linux? They don't know how computers work, have no idea how to take care of their own system's security and worst of all, lack the ability to learn. They're a burden, not an asset. Linux gains nothing from people like that. The only reason Micro$oft cares about them is because they pay for their products. Linux can be distributed for free, so we have to reason for it.

This.
My grandman switched to a tablet already.
"why would I want that huge desktop thing sitting around"

mfw my grandman is less of a luddite than most of Jow Forums.

>mfw my grandman is less of a luddite than most of Jow Forums.
Show me how you program on a tablet.

My grandmother doesn't even have a computer. None of my grandparents do.

I'd have a hard time explaining to them what a computer is. To them it's just this thing that connects to this internet thing that they have on their smartphones.

Heck, if anything I'd have to convince them to switch from Android to Windows 10

I write software on my surface pro.

>"What's a virus? Where is the .01%? Is it contagious? I have hip problems you know."
Computer virus is just like a virus in a real world, except that it affects computers. It can steal your images, it can lock Facebook and demand money for unlocking, etc.
>"Update? What? Do I have to buy a new computer?"
No. Computer, just like a living creature, has a brain. But the brain of computer is not physical. It is a program. The program that serves as a computer brain is called operating system, or OS for short. "Updating" in this context just means that OS goes online to take and incorporate into itself new features, bug fixes, performance improvements, and so on.
>"Ten windows are slow? What's my old friend Linda cooking with mint now? I thought she passed away in 96?"
Windows 10 is the name of the OS (brain) your computer has. Linux Mint is just another OS (brain) that is available. Unlike humans, computers can easily change their brains. I'm just advocating for that "Windows 10" brain is inferior to "Linux Mint" brain (or any other brain of type "Linux").

And I just want to make sure that you get one thing: the brain of OS is completely visible to you. You actually interact with it all the time. It's your desktop (wallpaper, icons, cursor, start menu, taskbar, windows, ...)
>"Watch your mouth sonny, I didn't buy you those Transformer toys just so you can be a potty mouth."
Sorry. *blushes*
>"What is 'drag and drop'?" (pushes mouse against mouse pad, lifts up mouse and drops on desk)
Linux Mint brain is easier to use.... that's all.
>"How do you turn it on?"
Just like you usually do.
>"The commies are still spying on me? No more computers for me or you."
No. Not commies. But let's not get into that now.
>"But how will I order that nice bolo tie on the shopping channel?"
You'll use Google (or something else, if privacy means anything to you).
>"Does it have the Blue teeth?"
Absolutely! And of course, all the best games: pysolfc and mines.

You write it in thinkpad mode. At that instant it's not a tablet.

This is retarded. Your grandma will use whatever you tell her is better for her. (Unless it requires getting used to something new - in which case the asnwer is a big no-no.) All the answers you provided bifurcate into a 100 different questions and turn into a 10 hour conversation/possible heart attack for your grandma.

>At that instant it's not a tablet.
:^)

My grandmother is using Linux Mint Cinnamon edition just fine that I installed on her laptop. It doesn't slow down, it doesn't get viruses and for any problem she has with it she can contact me any time. I even proactively ask her if she has had any problems with it, because my family isn't a bunch of manipulating idiots who would take advantage of other family members. If there's anything fully ready for older people, it's definitely Linux Mint Cinnamon edition. Even newer Windows versions aren't as comfortably familiar to people as Cinnamon is on the first look. Here's how the printer installation went:
>plug in the USB
>done

She used to have a computer that had browser toolbars and was so slow that everything took literal minutes instead of fractions of a second. I couldn't watch that so I installed Mint and one of my old SSDs. It's fast and doesn't stop being fast now.

ITT poor non-us people from third world lineage.
Who the fuck didn't have a computer twenty years ago?

I know. But this is just a shitposting.

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Chromebook. Next!

None of my grandparents own a computer, only one of them has a smartphone and she uses that for facebook. My other grandmother still calls me on a house phone and doesn't know how to put me on caller id

>It can steal your images, it can lock Facebook and demand money for unlocking, etc.
Oh gosh I don't want that. Can you install a firewall for me? My friend Linda said that prevents viruses

> "Updating" in this context just means that OS goes online to take and incorporate into itself new features, bug fixes, performance improvements, and so on.
Slow down, what is a bug fix? Why do I care about Performance improvements?

>Windows 10 is the name of the OS (brain) your computer has. Linux Mint is just another OS (brain) that is available. Unlike humans, computers can easily change their brains. I'm just advocating for that "Windows 10" brain is inferior to "Linux Mint" brain (or any other brain of type "Linux").
I don't think that's right user, i see a lot of commercials for Windows but i've never heard of this Leenus thing

Check this out.

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>Oh gosh I don't want that. Can you install a firewall for me? My friend Linda said that prevents viruses
Yes. But having Linux would be even better, since it's (as I've already said) immune to almost all viruses. linux + firewall is much stronger combination than windows + firewall.
>Slow down, what is a bug fix? Why do I care about Performance improvements?
Bug is an uwnanted behavior of a program. OS (brain) is also a program and therefore can suffer from bugs too. People who make programs do not release it just like that: they test it first to make sure everything works, but sometimes so called "bugs", or unwanted behavior, slip away. Most of the bugs are harmless: examples are wrong color of a button, mistyped word, menu that misses an entry, etc. But some of them are very dangerous! They can allow hackers to access your computer if they are aware of the bug and steal your credit card! Now, it's easy to see that a "bug fix" is a process that fixes a bug. When people who make programs find a bug, they fix it and put a fix on the Internet. Then your OS goes on the Internet to find a bug fix. When it finds it, it copies it into itself, which eliminates the bug. As for performance improvements, what that really means is that the way your OS works gets better: examples are faster browsing (and work generally), better stability, easier handling of multiple opened programs, and so on.

>I don't think that's right user, i see a lot of commercials for Windows but i've never heard of this Leenus thing
Because it's non-commercial. Linux is an international project on which the whole world works. Anyone can help: people from USA, New Zealand, Germany, Russia, UK, Spain, Canada, etc. It's open for everyone. But that doesn't mean everyone can modify it as they wish. What that really means is that anyone can publish what he thinks needs to be included in Linux, but for something to actually get included in Linux it needs to pass various tests. Tests are performed by Linus Torvalds and his team. Who's Linus Torvalds? He's the guy from Finland who started the project and is currently the main supervisor of it.

my repeating blackscreen on startup last night for no apparent reason.

I'm now like
50.10% Win10
49.90% Win7

trying to find reasons to keep it, they get fewer, and fewer, and fewer.

So this Linus Torvalds guy checks every program that runs on Linux? That's really impressive!

make her some desktop icons with the stuff she needs like email, browser, office

>Google Ultron
really hilarious greentexts desu

Grandmother Mary, in your golden years you're finding time is precious. Can you really afford to waste it, sitting around waiting for forced Windows updates to finish?

there are no annoying boxes and it looks like that one computer you used 10 years ago (not that it's a bad thing)
also what you see is what you get

I'd just like to interject for a moment. What you're referring to as Linux, is in fact, GNU/Linux, or as I've recently taken to calling it, GNU plus Linux. Linux is not an operating system unto itself, but rather another free component of a fully functioning GNU system made useful by the GNU corelibs, shell utilities and vital system components comprising a full OS as defined by POSIX.

Many computer users run a modified version of the GNU system every day, without realizing it. Through a peculiar turn of events, the version of GNU which is widely used today is often called "Linux", and many of its users are not aware that it is basically the GNU system, developed by the GNU Project.

There really is a Linux, and these people are using it, but it is just a part of the system they use. Linux is the kernel: the program in the system that allocates the machine's resources to the other programs that you run. The kernel is an essential part of an operating system, but useless by itself; it can only function in the context of a complete operating system. Linux is normally used in combination with the GNU operating system: the whole system is basically GNU with Linux added, or GNU/Linux. All the so-called "Linux" distributions are really distributions of GNU/Linux.

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kek

>Think about it grandma. If you switch to Linux all the guys on Jow Forums will think you're cool but only if you use the same distro on the same hardware as they do.

I'm not a freetard, grandma can use whatever she wants.

Sorry about windows grandma here Try this.
(Actually based on Linux)

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Didn't Linda passed away in 1996?

it will bring your dead husband back and teach you beautiful knitting designs

Literally replace Windows with Linux and give it a Windows-like DE. She'll never realize a difference as long as you set the web browser icon to that of IE6.

>give grandparents an iPad
>show them how to access the FaceBook and the FaceTime
>be done with them forever until they die next month

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unironically the first part of this

KEK