Arrive at interview room

>arrive at interview room
>noticed the whiteboard wheels hidden behind the curtains

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>Alright user, show how you would invert a binary tree on this here whiteboard

>starts drawing your git commit history

>when you quit the cancerous tech job and get certified to do a more physically demanding but way more rewarding and less ethically ambiguous job

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what the fuck is a binary tree

>at interview
>they tell me their """"coding standards""""
>tell them that they're using brakes in the wrong way and walk out

some sjw bullshit

leave Jow Forums

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>So, what do you do outside of work?

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>at interview
>everything going well
>they wheel in the whiteboard
>"please do fizzbuzz"
>ok I got this
>write out memorized code
>they are happy
>"now some more general questions"
>oh shit
>"why are manholes round"
>no idea
>"please draw a compass with all directions"
>fuck

It's like a linked list where everyone has either 0 or 1 or 2 child nodes.

fuck, they got you on the manhole question too?

so in code it would look like this?
array = [ [ [3,3] ] ], [ [ [ [ 4, 4 ] ] ] ] ]

>Alright, now print a truly random number

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Read CLRS, mong

what is it? I currently have a summer job at a moving company. from someone born in a white-collar household and is sheltered as FUCK, this job and the people in it are so foreign, like a different universe almost. a few of them are straight up fucking barbarians. but I could sort of see myself doing it if somehow I weren't able to keep going to school. a 12+ hour day is the norm, and it's in the south (US, ofc) so you have to deal with this fucking country-pop type of music that everyone fucking listens to

but man some of the people there are extremely admirable and hard workers who somehow push through and remain friendly and positive through all the shit of life, and despite some things like having various dependents and being constantly in a state of having only a few dollars saved up. I was reading industrial society and its future earlier and these people are like the closest you can get in the US to people without surrogate activities, whose mental and physical powers are devoted to supporting themselves and their families, working constantly all the time

> Draw a penis in the whiteboard
> Lock the doors
> Take my pants off
> Shit on the table
> Pick up the shit and fling it at the walls
> Smear shit all over the interviewer
> Force him to suck my dick
> Cum down his throat
> Leave without putting my pants on
The only correct answer.

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I graduated in february and I'm literally afraid of getting a job. I spent four years in uni partying and getting high, I have no idea how I passed all my tests and got such good marks on everything. I was top of my class and I literally feel like I don't know jackshit.
I've been smoking pot and jacking off all day since I graduated telling me mum I'm sending in my resume everywhere I can find but nobody calls back.

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"I make shitty programs with /dpt/"

and im busting my ass to make C's

>programmer interview at big fintech company
>everything going well
>they ask for my previous projects
>pull out old Thinkpad with anime and pony stickers
>boot up arch linux
>X doesn't start, have to reboot a few times to fix it
>it finally launches, show off my custom window manager rice

>they don't say a word during the whole time, I think that they were impressed

>don't get the job

Why don't you guys bring a fucking portfolio to interviews?

Firstly, if you're not retarded, they no longer have to quiz you to see if you're competent. Not only that, but it puts you in control of the interview. Your work becomes a central topic. It gives you easy talking points that you're comfortable with. It gives the interviewer something more substantial to keep than just a basic resume.

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There is no such thing as random.

>tfw you finally quit tech to pursue a rewarding career you love
>old friends always bitching to you about their job
>prajeets taking over their departments

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A plant that bears binapple fruits.

>why are manholes round
because any other shape lid would fall into the hole

Literally ask a friend for a reference. Half of my jobs (including my current one) have been through friends in meme groups and shit.

that's the joke

But why are some manholes not round?

do you print out your code on paper?

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I program in punch cards.
I just bring a few crates with some of my best projects and tell the guy interviewing me about them.

Ive only ever seen round ones

this desu

#lang racket/base

(struct node (val left right) #:transparent)

(define (invert tree)
(if (null? tree)
tree
(node (node-val tree)
(invert (node-right tree))
(invert (node-left tree)))))


There's really something pleasing about how this code works. I just like to look at it.

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>Hole would fall into hole if it was different shape than a hole.
Nice logic. Black muslim trans lesbian programmer detected.

STEM was a lie. When pajeets and automation take over tech there's gonna be a lot of over educated people out of work.

>>"why are manholes round"
wait whats the answer? is this one of those banal "lets see how he thinks" questions.

Yes. I'm a computer engineer though so I have some other options as well, including PCB designs, documentation and technical writing, even some 3D CAD.

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>friends
what

Yes, and the short answer is already in this thread.

>We were looking through your github account, user, and... we found that many of your projects included variables named "nigger" or "penis". Would you mind explaining your thought process when naming variables?

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The answer is that it can't fall through its own hole. If a manhole had some lateral dimension that was shorter than another, it could slide through diagonally.

faggotwhocantusegoogledetected.exe

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If it's sitting on the lip, making it bigger than the hole, it wouldn't be able to fall through. Dumbass.
Nice fake picture.

yeah you're right
what the fuck, the square cover in that pic is smaller than the fucking lip

>Look I googled one reason. I win
There are dozen of reasons for manholes being round you stupid cunt. Maybe someone will sometime make an infographic for you and you'll get it.

The absolute state of this board

the diagonal is sqrt(2) times the side length

unless the lip is unreasonably long, it would still fall through

jesus christ

Holy fuck that is genius.

Not that you need to know random bullshit to be smart, but if you don't have a mind to pick up and retain these little seemingly insignificant things and/or the curiosity to learn strange stuff, you're not cut out to be great and think outside the box.

The people who make big steps and get shit done in Western culture are the ones who have dedicated time to other arenas and disciplines than their career path. It's what allows them to make mental leaps.

Even if a square cover couldn't fall in the hole (it absolutely can), its way easier to place a round one properly into its fitting. With a square you need to have it facing the exact right direction and essentially line up 2 sides, which isn't easy with a 100lb~ chunk of steel. With a circle you only need to have one part of the lip lined up anywhere on the hole and it can be placed in whatever way. You're objectively wrong here and any further arguments are probably just going to make you look even dumber

Imagine not understanding basic Pythagorean Theorem.

it's simple geometry, but yeah it's just something you wouldn't normally think of, it's kinda clever.

Manhole covers are heavy as fuck too, so I'm sure that it's also nice to be able to roll them around.

A circular manhole cover also doesn't have to be lined up in any specific way to get it to fit into place.

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>Thank you sir we'll give you a call

hi every1 im new!!!!!!! holds up spork my name is katy but u can call me t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m!!!!!!!! lol…as u can see im very random!!!! thats why i came here, 2 meet random ppl like me _… im 13 years old (im mature 4 my age tho!!) i like 2 watch invader zim w/ my girlfreind (im bi if u dont like it deal w/it) its our favorite tv show!!! bcuz its SOOOO random!!!! shes random 2 of course but i want 2 meet more random ppl =) like they say the more the merrier!!!! lol…neways i hope 2 make alot of freinds here so give me lots of commentses!!!! DOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>Well user you have an excellent work history in relevant fields, have proven you have extensive knowledge of the coding languages and concepts you'll be working with, and have otherwise proven yourself to be a capable and respectable member of society
>But can you tell me why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch?

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