Tech interviews

I'm white :)

My name is Chang

I don't care about that shit.

Bu really, what is the non-meme answer to a question like this? say you absolutely need this job and they pull some diversity question like that, I mean wtf can you say?

Pull some shit out your ass about how your fetish means you have a different gender

bullshit your way in, then find a real job somewhere else

Ask what their corporate demographics look like, identify the weakest area(s) and offer up something that addresses them directly.

say

> indeed, I actually am part nigger myself. Having people from different backgrounds and points of views help the problem solving process.

I am south italian which basically means I am black

Employ me or i report u huehuehuehueheu

nothing, at that point they want you out of the room asap

I'm a 30yo khv incel.
While everyone here takes a family for granted I'll be right there to remind you of your breeder privileges.

asians are low priority hires

Sure, but you're white so it doesn't matter.

"I have a mental illness too. Thank you. "

But if i have to be serious - I will just say that I like working with people from all backgrounds and forget to check my emails from this company again. May as well add their name to my email filters just to be sure.

My name is De'Chang

I like traps and I'm an Amerimutt. I code in ebonics. Very diverse profile

this, mention all the diverse people you've worked with before and how much you've learned from them. add something about wanting to continue to collaborate with people who come from diverse backgrounds that allow them to see things from a perspective you may not have thought of or understand. maybe specifically talk about some really diverse shit you did once like worked on a group project in freshman year on a book about freed slaves or some shit and how that really got you thinking from a different point of view. bullshit, basically.

or just say you're not neurotypical and you don't feel comfortable talking about how with total strangers and people who might eventually hold a position of power and/or privilege over you. this deflects your supposed lack of diversity and puts the onus on them to explain how management in their company isn't like that or something similar.

are there any non-cucked tech companies?

I'm a black man trapped in a white man's body, I hope you'll respect my identity.

not really, no, you have to trade your dignity for the shekels. In fact, that's what your (((overlords))) love the most.
Remember the creator of that little garage project called JS?

>excuse me, where can I find the ladies room please?

I'm a spic, so is an easy one.

Jews aren't white.

LARP

>Be white guy
>Used to date black girl
>Met her at a party, we hit it off, phat ass and white girl face.
>She thought my racially charged humor was hilarious because I'm a Polish/French/German mutt whose childhood friend is Jewish raised Dominican
>Get into some shit at my new job because I shaved my head way short
>I always get buzz cuts but between moving apartments and switching jobs, my beard and hair just kept blowing out of my head and I had no time for a cut
>HR wants to know if my shaving my head means anything
>Wut?
>She goes on to insinuate that I'm a klansman
>get offended, threaten to lawyer up, head honcho manager is nearby and hears our heated conversation
>HR tells manager that "she's attempting to talk my hatred of minorities out with me"
>Manager looks incredulous and looks me up and down
>Asks HR "did user say anything racist? What happened?"
>Tell him she pulled me in because she said my short hair must mean I'm in the KKK
>Manager just has a half smile like I'm kidding but it slides off when he sees I'm dead serious
>"user, you can go. You're not in trouble, I'll talk to you tomorrow. Just please for my sake keep the lawyers out of this"
>Come back next day, GF had to take me to work because I had a flat tire that morning and no plug kit
>My manager's face when he saw me kissing my black GF goodbye was priceless
>HR lady got bounced because it turns out I wasn't the first person she fucked with

Funnily enough, not even once did the though of telling HR "I have a black GF" cross my mind as it just seemed like a cop out.

Attached: 1535396828071.gif (600x500, 2.91M)

>how could you add value to this particular resource?
I'm Indian.
Should be good enough.

>I'm a Polish/French/German mutt

That`s whiter than 90% of Americans.

Attached: Peter+Super+Goy[1].jpg (1280x1024, 166K)

>did user say anything racist? What happened?

nice reflex
what if you had an actual blond aryan gf?

>"sir, I shit in toilets"

I deal crack

I am a niggerkin. I feel it in my bones that I am a Nigger. Dont deny my bones!

That's pretty funny.

that's the nicest thing anyone on Jow Forums has ever said to me
she was already fired so I doubt it would have changed anything but seeing his face and just shaking his head while walking into the building was the fucking cherry on top

All the managers are nice to me and usually give me the easier work. I found out from another employee it's because they don't want to piss me off and have me lawyer up over "ethnic workplace harassment". Turns out I had/have a really solid case against them if I wanted to be a dick.

>do you value good workers? Can you add some value to them? Looks like you aren't. Bye bye

I'd rather work at a company where I dont have to look over my shoulder. I'm a white guy. Fuck your diversity. America was founded and built by us. Nonwhites get out, pajeets go first.

lul

By being the only straight white male in your company
;^)

>we at tech X value diversity highly, how could you add value to this particular resource?

I can see that this company lacks in diversity, I mean, everyone here is a human. I will bring my pet turtle, that ought to improve things a bit.

I always wondered truly just how far you can push this nonsense and get away with it.

nigger lover

Diversity isn't a resource