And why should I hire you?

'Cause I'm the best you can find ... besides the ... Blue Haired fat gender-fluid feminist with Gender Studies PhD screetching on the previous interview.

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Because I'm a certified loli connoisseur and can increase your company's productivity levels by mitigating your shit taste in anime girls.

WTF bro. YOU invited ME to the interview.
You should know the answer by yourself at this point

How do I convince someone who knows very little about computers that I know things about computers?

why not ?

I have an IQ of 200, so please tell me this: why should I accept your job offer?

Why do we have roleplaying threads like this?

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lmao, they would hire xir over you

Can we start calling fat feminists Craigs because they look like Craig from Malcolm in the Middle?

I'm a rather competent FPGA engineer and there aren't too fuckin many of those.

>Interesting. I liked your yada yada yada part. It's something that none of our candidates' said. Thinking out of the box is very important.
>So, what inspired you to seek VR male masturbator beta tester career?

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"You shouldn't"

you get money if you dont have a fucking job ? where the fuck are you from

try owning land

>what is unemployment subsidies

It's called being a clever welfare leech and getting more money than most people earn in a year.

Did you learn this at university and is it practical to learn it outside of that? How long does it take from knowing literally nothing about FPGAs (but being an experienced C programmer who understands x86 assembly) to being "rather competent"? Is this a specialisation you would recommend?

I had to completely redo the spaghetti code a math major wrote. His shit would need 5 hours to run, ignoring basic design pattern, i/o and reusability. Knowing math is not all there to software engineering.

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The truth of what should happen
>The fact Im even here shows there is a mutual interest, you know my skills and I know my capability, whether we build something special here is mostly down to you Mr employer

What actually happens
>This interview is a facade, you have already made your choice based on who will actually give you the least shit for you to actually do your job properlly. It's either a dumb lackey with no free thought, a friend or family, or even worse some to just help with PR.

I fucking hate interviews

yeah it was my main thing at school. You could probably learn it on your own though. Eh, it's okay. It seems like all the major vendors are trying to kill/replace the HDL coders with all the investment in openCL, high level synthesis kinda things but that may never come to fruition

if you don't then my fursona might pounce on you!!!! rawr xd!!!

so we're prepared for the real world

What country gives welfare monkeys more money than what most people make? In USA, it's minimum wage

I'm a transblack genderqueer muslim pansexual demiwoman.
I don't have any qualifications whatsoever but if you hire me you can check off all your diversity quotas all at once.
I suggest I work from home, I can write an angry tweet about white males and a separate one on how nice and inclusive our company is, about once a week seems right.
You can just send me 5K every month and I'll make sure the company looks good by 2018 standards. Deal?

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you can technical count me as Hispanic if you want, great grandpa Lopez came from Spain.

W-well.... um.... BRRRRAAAAAAAAAAPPPPP!

based brapposter.

>I'm a transblack

youtube.com/watch?v=a63lQL7eIJ4

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Go back to leftypol

I don't identify as human, therefore human laws don't apply to me.

>transblack

youtube.com/watch?v=EMcu57J_jNQ

youtube.com/watch?v=a0S425nVBng

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Hey, if you ask ME, unabling to answer that question yourself, then don't. I bet you have a load of applicants waiting under the door. I'd rather find a place where I shouldn't convince other people to work with me.

After leaving the room: "What a pompous schmuck. Tho I bet he thinks the same about me, good riddance".
While driving home: "Why should I hire you. Heh. I bet there are cucks who would fawn over that dude while he screws them".

Seems like a fetal alcohol syndrome.

Because I'm the only candidate in this country who has and can [made up technical terms like eco-blockchain and bullshit corporate mumbojumbo such as goal-oriented synergies].

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goddammit, I need to fap now.

Nah, you can tell by the groove under the nose.

Yeah but on the other hand you have CS graduates who use 3 for loops for something log() could do.

Be Shaun King,
Black Lives Matter activist

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LOL SNOWFLAKE Republitard got TRIGGERED

>Shaun King
youtube.com/watch?v=rBNIT6-xWSc

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Those Whiggers, LOL

youtube.com/watch?v=4LfJnj66HVQ

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Canaedia.
Most people here make around 20 - 30k and you can get up to 40k in welfare.

Because I know how to make a quantum processor that actually works and can be sold to the public.

*calls 911*

Hope that they know very little. A lot of places have non-technical managers hire for soft skills rather than hard.
But if it's programming they're gonna want you to whiteboard and you're sol.

I also, fingerfuck my hands when i want to feel important.

Because I'll be so good at the job you will be able to take kapersky and mcafee of all the work computers

I'll schnozzle your schlong

I uhm

Well, I've never been disliked after 2 days of knowing me. Never ever.

The leftypol invasion is real. Whenever you see gb2pol comments, you know who are behind them.