>Let's circle back to that item later, it seems out of scope
>I added Ganesh's team to the weekly meeting, I'm hoping to leverage some synergy between groups if we focus on our core competencies
>We can touch base during tomorrow's standup, give you some time to get the lay of the land
>I want to highlite our value add and show that this is a win-win
>I'm feeling out of the loop here, when was the last time Xi Liung ran the numbers?
>Rupesh is going to do a deep dive into the data and perform a drill down into our key customer segments
>This initiative is really going to move the needle on our top KPIs
>We can already make this a game changer by taking care of some low hanging fruit
>Let's take that offline, ping me when you know you'll be available
>We're not trying to boil the ocean here, our north star hasn't changed
Let's circle back to that item later, it seems out of scope
kek
But this is how you earn money.
hurts man
>move the needle on our KPIs
I am, unironically, going to use this at the next scrum of scrums I attend. Thanks user
>working for a company and not in a comfy government lab
>working at all
Nooo way. I have a cooler apartment than a NEET.
HAHAAHAHAHAH
>send ping packet when you're available
>he calls you back to set up offline meeting
Like pottery. Thanks user
I'm actually leaving a shitfest company for a research center. Feels good
>The ball is in their court at this point
CS major here, is it actually this bad? Marketing talk and advertising makes me want to blow my head off
Yes. Change majors. There are too many fucking programmers. Go to r/cscareerquestions if you want a reality check of how many people can't find a software engineering job for a year out of school.
>We're walking on quicksand right now
But I really like programming and working with computers. I've been doing it since 10
The closer you are to customers the worse it is. Pray you don't end up in a web shop or ENTERPRISE systems.
We all love it
Too bad. You're fucked. Learn to weld or sell houses
We really need to push it this month. We're over budget and behind quota. I want this implemented ASAP guys!
I'm also a physics major, should I count more on that?
So, did the normies fuck up something else?
I did this and it is unironically the best decision I have made. No more stupid office politics, outright lying about basic shit that anyone with google can debunk, and no more having to swallow the koolaid at gun point.
Marketers are scum. It's honestly not so bad if they're doing it for a consumer product like a TV or a buzzword-tech-home appliance, but it becomes downright dangerous when it's applied to things that have meaningful consequences like healthcare.
yes. some places are better or worse than that, but basically that's it in a nutshell.
>There are too many fucking programmers
wrong. there are too little who actually provide value. if you're any good, you'll be fine.
Is there any way to know for certain I'm good?
I don't know? are you struggling in class? are you spending time practicing and feel like you're getting better? usually doing an internship will force you into a corporate environment and possibly learning something.
I taught myself C# in two days and I finish all my projects as soon as they're assigned
I really wouldn't worry about it to be honest. Programming will be necessary at every workplace soon because value added botnet iot services is the new corporate meme.
You think corporate is bad? Wait until you see startups. It's marketing speak on steroids all the time combined with a cult mentality and worse.
>autists dont understand that in order to sell something you need to market it
This is why foss almost never succeeds. It's amazing how out of touch and narcissistic you all are. It didnt used to be like this, not sure why the industry is like this now. Whenever we get an American interviewee for an entry level position it's always some kid that looks like he's about to snap and shoot up the office. Even the ones that make it to the top are anti-social and keep almost entirely to themselves or form like one or two friendships without even getting to know anyone outside of their immediate team. I imagine that's what most of Jow Forums is like.
it really is fucking great my man, at least in my experience. I never actually worked at a company as a full time year round employee, just a few [paid] internships, but that was enough to put a sour taste in my mouth of the whole commercial side and I tried hard to get to a nice research lab setting. I get paid a little less but it is worth it to me
t. xoomer
I found a software engineering job immediately after graduation--my last class was on a Wednesday, and I started on Thursday. I did not even get a CS/SE degree lol. these redditors you speak of arr probably just dumb cucks with no social skills or hygiene. I am not surprised they're still looking for a job. would you want to work with a Redditor?
I unironically love the corporate world, even the para-language that emerges from it.
It's so codified, I know exactly how to behave and how to play the game. I'm the fucker that will have fun at meetings or brainstorming sessions.
>planned standups
cancer
What's the meaning of this comic
Yes.
I see this shit all the fucking time
Glad I don't actually work at the companies I hear this shit at