Antivirus? nah... i don't need that

This joke hasn't been funny in a long time

Haven't used an AV since XP.
Common Sense is up to date though.

Antivirus software nowadays is a malware that defends your computer from its own competitors.

It was relevant back in 00s, it's not relevant now. Anyone who pays for this shit is a literal retard.

Got a free malwarebytes lifetime premium back in 2008
why not?

kek at that password note, my professor do that all the time.

Common Sense is installing GNU+Linux.

>I already use muh cumon senss

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>antivirus
bloat, overhead, disk destroyer

It seems like he's clearly having to compensate for the weight of the sword by pushing his elbow into his stomach, and the sword's design is consistent with it being heavy (large handle for enough mechanical advantage to let the wielder lift it with two hands). A plastic sword of that size would also be likely to break the first time someone actually swung it in the air. On the other hand, idk who would make such a retardedly oversized sword out of actual steel.

You fags are aware that 0-day exploits exist right?

adblock is objectively the best antivirus, if you don't believe me i actually didn't install any antivirus on this system i put together for my nephew, but i DID install adblock. he hasn't gotten a single virus in the 3-4 years or so he's owned it, he's like 12

You are aware that anti virus does fuck all against a true 0day, right?

An antivirus can black a malicious payload from being installed on a device with the payloads binary md5.

>with the payloads binary md5.
the fuck do you think a 0day is?

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What are you implying? The antivirus will block and/or remove the payload from being installed. Not all malware need to be opened manually to work.

Antivirus doesn't fix 0-days

it goes really well with my softram 95

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my weakness is not being chad. my strength is knowing that I am not chad and I do not pretend to be.

>unlock origins
>https everywhere
>noscript
>torrent from private trackers

Tell me how I am at all susceptible to viruses

you can clearly see that its not a steel blade, even with this low res and unfocused image.
Its probably some larp sword, foam with a wooden/hard plastic core.

The only 0-day I know of is your sex life OP.

0-days are just sneaky viruses

What if the malware spreads by port scanning?

i dont see why u dont just install a light weight antivirus and just leave it in the background. Common Sense + AV = best combo.

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>what is a behaviour blocker

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>What is sandbox?
>What is a limited account?

Those are things that do the same shit for the most part but manual instead so you can waste time and pretend to be epic smart on Tajikistani iced coffee discussion boards

Common sense is an antivirus.

That won't block a zero-day.

based

You're aware zero-days exploiting antiviruses exist, right?

if a hacker knows a zero day, and knows how to use it... im sure he know hows write abit of malware that is brand new.

Botnets use a fingerprint to propagate and communicate with the c2 server. The antivirus can automatically detect the installation process with things like tcp sequence numbers and block the binary using the antivirus payload hash blacklkst.
The installation process is still a very noticeable event. A 0-day being used to propagate a botnet will follow a heartbeat to actually be sent commands from the c2 server. How else would the threat actor know which IP address is a compromised node?
Fair enough, but if we're talking about a malware that you won't get from a shady website, the threat actor probably made the malware to not stay on the device for too long. And what if the malware makes the device port scan port 23/80/etc to propagate? That leaves a thick fingerprint that can easily detected.

>block the binary using the antivirus payload hash blacklkst.
If that works, it's not 0-day by definition, retard.

>A 0-day being used to propagate a botnet
*encrypts your files without contacting a server and demands crypto*
whew

You don't get it, the 0-day is more than likely used to propagate a payload (the fucking binary). The 0-day can't change the binary md5, so the antivirus can easily block it, making the 0-day useless on that device unless the threat actor uses another vector of spreading his malware.

Anyone competent enough to have an access to a zero-day can TRIVIALLY alter the payload enough that it won't be detected by the checksum.

Keeping your device up to date be part of the ebin common sense antivirus meme you fags always say.
The payload would still follow the same fingerprints and functions though. Why do you think so many Mirai variants are found even though the payload md5 is different?

>Why do you think so many Mirai variants are found even though the payload md5 is different?
That isn't an 0day.
In fact, that's a retarded example. I can download the source code right now and make my own version without any effort.
0day by definition is new behavior, you're just hoping something it does is caught, and you have no real reason to
besides, people test their payloads against antivirus to avoid them

>Why do you think so many Mirai variants are found even though the payload md5 is different?
Because Mirai is ancient and the antivirus makers have access to its actual source code?

> not having -1-day blacklist updates

Mirai variants with 0-days exist. Look up satori.
>people test their payloads against antivirus to avoid them
This does no good unless they change the way the binary is installed, the heartbeat, and tcp fingerprints.
Mirai is basically a framework now, other malware have been found to have traces of it with completely different scanning/attack vectors.

I'm going to work now, expect late responses.

I've never used antivirus and I've been using the internet since '96. Only time I got a virus was when some idiot at work used our private network to download god knows what, the shit infected a bunch of our laptops, then all I had to do was reinstall Windows 2000 because I was smart enough to keep backups of everything. The only people who need antivirus are idiots who buy a machine and don't bother to learn how it works; who the fuck buys a car and doesn't learn the inside and out of it?

i mean if you're smart enough not to download dodgy bullshit, no need for an anti-virus. Anti-virus are botnets and they can see absolutely everything you do since they overview your entire system. This and it slows down a pc

current windows defender is safer than any antivirus.

>it would be too heavy
3kg max

italian espada a little shorter and only 2kg

> 3kg max
And a lever effect.

i've been working very hard on my weakness, thank you very much
i'm am VERY weak.

> I need an AV.
I still test immunet on my VM. seems worth to install on my host machine.

Though, I've hardened my windows and frequently update. Still need an AV.

You literally learn in CS how to bypass AVs, don't be a retard and you're good.

>install linux
>forget to install a firewall
every time

>This joke hasn't been funny in a long time
Because it's not a joke.
>firefox
>adblocker
>some privacy settings
>don't dl phishy software
is the ultimate combo also known as common sense, you don't have to be tech savvy, be wary on the internet like you are in real life and you're good.

you are genuinely retarded hope you are aware of it

this. I work in a very small company (5 people) and since we're all devs and know how to use a computer, there's no antivirus on any of our PCs. Well there is a firewall embedded in our router but no actual antivirus software. Worked here for 10 years, never had any problem.

>you are genuinely retarded hope you are aware of it
No I'm not.
>signature-based protection
xor
>behavior-based protection
userland programs should not be able to mess with your system.
You don't give system call access to unknown programs, do you ? (it's common sense)
>firewall
you don't need a AV for this.
Don't allow network access to unknown programs (again, common sense)
don't mess with your router if you don't know what your doing (common sense too)
>packet-based inspection
you're most likely not in some shady company and you don't use a mitm-kind of proxy that spoof your identity.

When you want to drive a car, you learn how to.
When you want to drive a bike, you learn how to.
When you want to have a job, you better know what to do.
it's exactly the same with computers. And don't give me the
>muh muh me too old
or the famous
>muh muh don't have time
Both are wrong and you know it.

>antivirus
peak boomer

Chrome + ublock kept my family's PCs safe for 3 years now(since I uninstalled the antivirus). Antiviruses are truly obsolete now. Windows security is still pretty bad, but not NEARLY as bad as during pre-7 era, certainly not enough to use a full-blown antivirus. Nowadays a Windows vulnerability is a worldwide news while back then it was basically what you lived with every day, just having your PC connected to the Internet got you a bunch of Internet worms.

That means he had sex today

If you use Linux maybe it's true but if you download pirate programs and games you are just retarded

One horny day a (new) ad will not get blocked and your nephew will click on sexy.exe
>"anti"virus could have stopped this

I write software all the time that looks like malware. Calling home (telemetry, user preference data, user uploads), changing behavior dynamically (platform discovery), executing remote payloads (automatic update), capturing global user input (hotkeys), modifying the system (environment hooks, autorun), hiding from the user (background tasks) and much more! My programs are very rarely flagged by AV.

I wrote a literal keylogger and none of the avs gave a shit.

No, it counts as blotware

Did your keylogger send results to a server?

Antiviruses don’t actually offer any proactive protection, there are tools/kernel drivers for wangblows that do, and they’re by microsoft, and they’re free(tm), but at the end of the day if you’re dumb enough to think AVs do anything you’re probably too dumb to use tools made for absolute retards.

>open some site with uBlock Origin and most important filters enabled
>antivirus block the site: JS.Trojan.common.something
Thanks AV

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You tested shitty AV
Mine literally block unauthorized physical keyboards until I explicitly allow them

>he trust Common Sense
>he doesn't know he is actually the biggest security fail on his computer
>he thinks he's superior and he's invulnerable to exploits because he knows computers

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I wrote a screenshot tool with crazyass hotkey support which requires sifting through literally every keypress. Plenty of data is sent to a server in the form of screenshots, I could easily stuff additional data in with them.

Software keyloggers aren't physical keyboards, what the fuck are you on?

Winfag detected

>Plenty of data is sent to a server
So the data was sent to a server???

I mean... In a manner of speaking.
They pressed the hotkeys and data went over the wire. That's technically keylogging even if indirect and pretty worthless.