Anal cleansing technology is technology

fun fact arabs use it instead of paper as paper leaves smell and it is more cost to add

I dont wash my asshole.

either this, a bidet, or wet wipes are the patricians preferred ass wiping method. just using paper to wipe your ass is fucking animalistic

>tfw doctors stole my colon
i just wanna poo like normal people

lmao. did you get cancer or something?

>wet wipes

lmao

I had a butt ton of ulcers and they said it will lead to cancer and then they stole it
I was 13 at the time so I had no choice
rather have died desu

No kidding, my new flat has this "bum hose" and i love it, it makes wiping after a sticky poo a lot easier since most of the sticky part is no longer on your bum

>Not having a bidet installed
Fucking americucks, still living in the XIX century lmao

When i was younger, my parents had this hand shower thingie in their bathroom. I'd give myself an enema with this after pooping and push out everything really forcefully

That made my colon really clean.
Now that i think about it, it was a pretty fucked up thing to do considering i was 13

I use it everyday, and never going back to toilet paper again.

I've had a bottom shower or whatever you call it for two months and it's great. I don't use it all the time, but sometimes when the poo is sticky or wet, I simply use water to wash it away instead of fighting with wipes. It should be more common, at least in private homes.

>Not having a gf (male) clean it off with her tongue under the threat of blackmail and defunding HRT

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where i live we have a shower

>cleaning the bathroom
oh lordy, i'm dying here, just imagining you going "oh, hey, this must be for spraying down the bathroom. how thoughtful and how convenient."

I can't go back to having a chapped acid burnt anus with poop on my butt hair.

Bidet for life.
Only wish I had known about it sooner.

I think there is a stigma about them in the US because people think they are gay europoor shit.

the worst part is i can't have anal sex

I don't understand how that works.

So your small intestines are attached directly to your sphincter? Does that just mean you have to shit every few hours or something or just wear a diaper or what.

6 years ago i ran out of toilet paper, but there was an old washcloth hanging in the bathroom. i ran it under warm water and cleaned my ass after a shit. wow, it felt great. i haven't used toilet paper since then.

should probably wash that washcloth one of these days though.

>cheap amazon chinkshit sprayers
Up your game to the made in Japan king of toilets:
build.com/toto-ms992cumfg-toilet/s897463?uid=3026370

totousa.com/products/neorest

They made washlet retrofit seats as well that are < $1k

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>I think there is a stigma about them in the US because people think they are gay europoor shit.
They aren't common in Europe either.

>I think there is a stigma about them in the US because people think they are gay europoor shit.

you're probably right. they are/were associated with the french, and we've had a weird love/hate thing with all things french for decades

youtube.com/watch?v=Du9ItTsEpYE

nobody likes the french

This is literally what poor people use in India and Sri Lanka.

wait a minute... zreviews?

>butt ton

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If you can afford it... definitely go for the heated ones.

I have mine connected to the cold water and when the temperature drops outside... lets just say that these water jets can hurt you and if your ass instantly goes numb from ice water its a recipe for disaster.

Wait, how do you get it under you with the bowl?
Are you supposed to stand to use it? Or is there some sort of common squat technique, or different way the toilet is built?

>poor people in India have $10000 toilets
totousa.com/neorest-750h-dual-flush-toilet-10-and-08-gpf-with-actilight

They don't have fancy shiny shit hoses, but they still have shit hoses:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bidet_shower#Prevalence

>that much money to shoot water at your ass
people are wondering why bidet aren't common here. Japanese being jews are the cause.

If you're not using baby wipes then you're not living.

The cheap ones work, you can get one for ~$20 on amazon if you don't have a huge toilet budget.

hahaha OP.
I first saw these things when I went to India.

Japanese washlet is far superior, you don't have to put your hands down there.

im not a faggot
>So your small intestines are attached directly to your sphincter?
pretty much, it's called a j-pouch so it gets a little buffer area
I poop 6-10 times a day and 3-6 on meds
I don't recommend it

Things are supposed to help with hemorrhoids as well. Rhoid rage fucking sucks.

if the US doesn't invest in anal cleansing technology we will get eclipsed by the japanese

youtube.com/watch?v=s0tCO4NdKeU

based

Lol no, no one is forcing you to buy expensive Japanese brand bidet. There is portable installable one you can buy without spending a lot of money

I use this only.

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It absolutely helps with hemorrhoids.
I don't have a bad one but it flares up if I skip the bidet a few times in a row.
Its literally the reason I bought one.

>god tier

gf's tongue

>great tier

hose
shower

>ameritarded ier

toilet paper shit spreaders

the absolute state of yurocuckolds
sharia can’t come soon enough

I would totally allow a gf (male) to clean me as well that sounds like a totally dick hardening arrangement

this is my pride and joy, every morning shit is a spa visit

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t. virgin who's never had a gf much less been rimmed by one

there's nothing better than pulling your legs back and letting her work on your asshole

keep talking

cold water? lol not!

fullrain

you really have to respect their marketing

>wiping soaking wet ass with tp
enjoy pulling tp dingleberries out of your ass

You can outlaw faggotry without Sharia.

Sharia is just outlawing faggotry and replacing it with child rape and voodoo.

no dingleberries if ass hair is trim
trimming ass hair is essential you should be doing this anyway

nothing gay about having your GIRLfriend clean your ass

fag...want your butthole to look pretty eh? enjoy your swamp ass because you don't have enough hair to wick away the sweat of being a man

>Using toilet paper is fucking barbaric.
So let me spray a stream of water at my shit encrusted asshole.

There! Perfectly clean!

>pubes
>wick away sweat

Dude what?

bet you use your hand like a good Arab

>So let me spray a stream of water at my shit encrusted asshole.
Well yeah, that's how cleaning works.

What the fuck you people don't pre-wipe before pussy shower?

I've used these all my life. Got laughed at by my friends when I was thirteen when I told them and never again after that told anybody. Just laughed with the boys at pussy showers );

what the fuck are you talking about?

Wipe before water. It's basic math.

>>So let me spray a stream of water at my shit encrusted asshole.
>Well yeah, that's how cleaning works.
Actually cleaning requires a cleaning agent. Or are you one of those people that just wets their hands after using the commode and thinks they have "washed" their hands?
Actually I do. I only shit naked, next to the shower. I don't use a stream of water nor a piece of paper. I get up and enter the shower and use a soapy hand to ensure total cleanliness. This allows me to have a rim job from my old man at ANY time.

I've been wiping dry after using a bidet. No trimming, and no dingleberries. It works better if you use a good TP that doesn't instantly revert to paper pulp when it comes in contact with a drop of water.

why though?

right now for the maximum cleanliness, I use my hand and water from the tap.
However this takes a while as I have had diarrhea for the last two years, so i often spend up to 30 minutes in the toilet when i take a shit
is it worth it getting a bidet?

Fuck getting my hand near shit ever again, I just turn on the water and browse Jow Forums until I'm clean.

How does it make hot water tho?

it doesn't, it's just cold water, but for me I'm in an apartment so it's better than wiping or showering or using a cup

thats hillarious, im actually getting one installed in the next few weeks as well. honestly i hate just using toilet paper, i have a hairy ass so it usually takes forever to clean with just tp.

toilet paper to dry, i remember french use little towels i think

I wash myself after shit.

so you installed a hose in your toilet to clean your bum only to end up wiping your arse anyway?

Tfw 18 and recently diagnosed with ulcerative colitus.

I dont know how bad the pouch shit is but boy have I considered it on the first flare.

This stands true for high-estrogen feminine söi hairlets like you, but what about proper hairy men with an hairy ass? Do you have any idea how difficult is to dry an ass that isn't perfectly smooth and hairless?
Hair hold a lot of water
Check your estrogen privilege , basedlord

You don't want heated. That stimulates sexually. Neither good for you or women.

Jet dry stuff for dishwashers would get all the water out.

i've heard of shit pouches
but i've never heard them being described as a "buffer area"
jesus, just how bad is it?

>be a man and use tp
fuck off, i want one of these ass-cleaners, because that's one less shitty job for me

No TP is shit, I'm asking if you have a solution for heavy ass besides being an ultra cum loving faggot and getting waxed like a woman

Yeah I'm in Japan, shit is nice. And my shower is directly across from the toilet so I can just go straight in

あなたは日本語をわからないね?

I moved on to wet wipes and have never looked back.

They get the job done better and more efficiently, I use just one wet wipe that I tear in half into two equal pieces and it's more than enough to get super clean. What's more, I'm surprised just how cheap wet wipes are, $1.50 for 50 shits. That's an insanely good bargain.

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I have IBS-D and this is my life too. It fucking sucks, makes it almost impossible to even think about getting a job and forget trying to date, no girl wants a guy who she has to watch run to the bathroom for another shit every 20 minutes for the first 3 hours of the day.

>tfw you'll never walk again
>at least i get neetbux

>he doesn't enjoy a nice rimmie after a long day at work

>being so beta your gf won't lick your asshole unless you trim it

ugly girls put up with a lot if you treat them right

I have a maid who cleans my anus after every shit.

I just go on the bed and ring the bell and she comes right up.

theyre bad for the environment