I posted this on Jow Forums yesterday but that board is clearly comprised of retards and morons who are of no help... I'm sure you guys are far superior to their deficient minds.
My skank whore of a step mother is slowly trying to force me out of the house by waging a psychological war on me and simultaneously coercing my dad into kicking me out for "my own good". She's a vile reptilian cunt and I'll leave it at that.
For Christmas, she bought me a Fitbit under the guise of "motivating me to live healthier". Of course this cumbucket gorgon quickly attached unreasonable strings to such a nice "gift", for example syncing the watch to her phone and monitoring my activity. She coerced my dad into agreeing that I can't order pizza or have any good food (ie not her kale and quinoa bullshit) unless I meet the 10,000 step goal (DAILY goal, I might add). And even when I do that I can only have a "treat" (like I'm a fucking dog) once a week.
I've averaged 2200 steps the last 5 days and only managed to reach 4000 steps yesterday when I attached it to our neighbor's dog for a couple hours. I don't think I can do that for very long because the results are suspect and I don't have access to the dog much. Also, the heart monitor was off and my cunt-mother questioned that.
What are ways to fake Fitbit movements and increase my score? I was thinking of a paint shaker or something but that would be too obvious (eg 8,000 steps in 5 min) not to mention the heart rate thing. Plus I'd have to take the bus or walk to the nearest hardware store so fuck that.
Is there a way to hack a Fitbit and manually input steps/heart rate/distance data? This would be the easiest thing.
>I'm sure you guys are far superior to their deficient minds Mmhmm. Now install gentoo
Ian Diaz
>wear on wrist >shake wrist, (i.e. masturbate) Not that hard bucko
Jeremiah Ward
Yes there is a way.
Now go Google and research, learn everything you need to know. Maybe by the time you've finished you'll have some skills that will actually support you in life.
Jose Morgan
i assume fitbits have digital accelerometers a part of them, just attach it to a machine and make it shake the fitbit. for real though, how fat are you OP?
Andrew Murphy
>I've averaged 2200 steps the last 5 days and only managed to reach 4000 steps yesterday
Sounds like you need it fatso.
William Thomas
I obviously tried shaking it but it seems like the accelerometer doesn't count hand movements easily.
You don't know yet you still felt the need to reply. KYS.
Ryan Hughes
Why not actually just walk it I average 10k a day withoit even trying retard
Connor Reed
this
Tyler Hall
maybe if you get a job u won't have to rely on your parents to buy you the food you enjoy
Cooper Torres
Post pics of your body first. And also your age. I smell underage.
Zachary Bailey
Just smash it into a million pieces
Ryan Bell
I'm 23 and I'm not posting any pics, retard.
Caleb Rogers
And your weight?
Nathaniel Price
Ever considered that you mother is not being a "cunt" but rather wants you to stop being morbidly obese? 10,000 steps is only something like 5 miles ffs.
Owen Flores
many times this
Isaiah Ortiz
It sounds like you need it. However, turn a record player on it's side and tape it to a playing record.
Aaron Wood
>can't run >can't walk >can't act on his own >can't even google Man, you're really pathetic.
Tell her the band is getting too sweaty causing a rash (put some chemicals on your skin where you wear it to this effect) and ask for the special edition sports band. Only wear the special sports band and say you wont wear any counterfeit goods only the official band from Fitbit. I doubt she'll pay even more for a single band for the Fitbit.
Austin Reed
Thanks I'm going to try this. I know there is some poison oak around.
Tyler Cooper
Just don't do too much, you just want a slight skin irritation that is getting worse. You don't want it to develop into a whole body rash.
The reason I said you don't want the counterfeit band is that Fitbit wont cover the warranty if it breaks if you aren't using their band. Turn the situation around and pretend you really care about the Fitbit since it is so expensive.
If you go on a 'long' walk to get the poison oak, it will show you got it outside on a walk, which would stop her complaining about you excersising. Remember the Fitbit can be worn on both arms.
Evan Baker
I think you should probably just go for the walk, pal.
And don't eat pizza if you're morbidly obese, which I am assuming is the case.
Lincoln Parker
Stop being a mooch fatass. Their house, their money, their rules.
Ryan Flores
I wish someone cared about my health as much as your mom does for you, I'm jealous
Blake Bailey
Careful if you hack your stats too much you'll be too swole to fix ur hacks
Crazy idea, but since you're too spineless to actually move out and not live under rules like a child, maybe try actually walking the 10,000 steps and improving your life?
Camden Garcia
>And don't eat pizza if you're morbidly obese, which I am assuming is the case. Nah, he should become bigger to claim disability.
t. boomer
Liam Reed
Why do you still live with your parents? Why don't you go outside? How fat are you?
Aaron White
If its a gitbit charge 2 as pictured, pull the straps until they seperate from the mounts. Its a common issue with them. Can't average shit if its broken.
Austin Bennett
Did they resolve this issue with the charge 3?
Bentley Harris
I'm not OP but hacking into a Fitbit sounds interesting. I wanted to do this for ages since it estimates my anaerobic threshold way too low. Does anyone know how to get into the code that's running it?
Also, 10 k steps is pretty much average if you're not completely sedentary. OP is a fat piece of shit
If you hate her that much >hack her social media webcam ect >get dirt >blackmail >profit
John Hernandez
Okay thanks a lot for the advice, especially about the counterfeit band, I didn't know that. I am pretty sensitive to poison oak, ivy, etc so I'll just gently rub it only on the part of my wrist in contact with the band.
Thanks again, I really appreciate it.
Ryder Barnes
>23 >parents control your life what the fuck
Adrian Martin
U wot m8? According to my pebble, I walked about 3500 steps last Sunday and I didn't leave my house, that was just going from my computer to the kitchen and to the bathroom. Seems like you need the exercise, you fatso
