What's the biggest IT emergency you had at work this week?

I guess it wasn't really an emergency, but It made me look like an ass in front of our client when I tried to train them how to use Skype for business and the software on my laptop malfunctioned.

Attached: crushing sounds.png (1277x772, 1.44M)

LITERALLY
NOBODY
IS
WORKING
WTF

Attached: fuck off.jpg (2048x1537, 1.75M)

There are actually a lot of people out there who are pretending that they are working.

"socializing", have you ever worked literally anywhere? It's fairly common to just talk to someone at their desk about an issue or when helping.

it's amazing, though, how brazen it is in group environments like that. like i know that half the time people with personal offices are fuckign around (I do it myself, and usually have some sort of non work related video going) but holy shit NOBODY is doing ANYTHING in that image. at least in the foreground.

It's Silicon Valley. It's... different.

How ironic that it's on the far right

half of them are laughing, several of the "socializing" labels are applied to people where the computer isn't even logged on wtf

how can a single person even survive being so salty

>half of them are laughing
OH NO, NOT LAUGHING. So fucking what?
>several of the "socializing" labels are applied to people where the computer isn't even logged on wtf
There's only one pair where the computer isn't logged in, and they're looking at a laptop, not the desktop.

DW, there literally aren't any black people here, that makes up for it.

But it's just a statement of facts.

In the end, the lives of black people DO matter, right? Or are you implying you think they don't? Why wouldn't you allow saying it then?

socialize is work too, dude

based autist

I spend at least 1/4 of every work day fucking around.

I work in-house IT for a mega-global corp. Issues are pretty complicated so I can't explain on here but typically a major sev 1 incident every couple days. Conference calls suck.

Haven't had any emergencies.

>Jow Forums
>at work

kek

>defending wage theft
and you wonder why The West is dying

I'm not paid hourly.

The service fell over, affecting upwards of 5 million people. Sucked, made headlines for 3 days straight.

Why isn’t there an “It’s ok to be white” sign?

a router up and fucking died just *pfffbbtt* dead

Attached: shutterstock_139655147-970x546.jpg (970x546, 93K)

My attention deficit disorder is going to have a field day if I worked there

Attached: orangepotion.gif (50x50, 6K)

lol
>we said we are ANTI FASCIST, so we're NOT fascists obviously.
The words are not as meaningful as the group they represent.

Some guy in marketing signed a contract with some new software vendor.

So I'm told this product is going in and that's the end of it, and I ask this sales guy what his requirements are

>Windows 2008 R2 at latest
>Must have a serial port for HASP dongle licensing
>Ask how I'm supposed to do this shit in the cloud
>"You can't legally license our product on any virtual machine"
>Ask marketing what the fuck is going on
>"Can't hear you, I'm buy flying the drone this company gave me as a kickback"
>Start quoting up a new HPE dedicated server and ask supplier to ensure it has a fucking 25 pin serial port

I work as IT at a public library so everything is only "pretend" emergency... Still, it's pretty cozy and I make 18.27/hr while I'm getting my computer engineering degree.

Count the black people in that image

I reported my client to their own Infosec department for violating IT security rules and storing project documents on Gdrive, and now I’m being threatened by my consulting company employer for endangering work at our biggest client.

I don’t think they can fire me for reporting misconduct, can they?

>can't fire me
They can do whatever the fuck they want if you're in the US.

That’s not true, there are certain protected actions that you cant be retaliated against for, like reporting sexual harassment

because everyone knows it's okay to be white dipshit

what does any of this cancer have to do with technology?

It's pretty much true. They can just say they fired you for not exceeding expectations and you were the lowest stack rank.

>be autist
>do not talk to anyone
>get fired for not fitting in or sexual harassment because people think you are a creep

>be chad
>talk to everyone
>get fired because you are fitting in too well and sexual harrasment for cockblocking the staff

What a powerful thing it really is.

What fucking software was that?

Here is mine.
>Develop some shit-tier analysis tools for a factory
>They work fine but look like shrek just took a shit on it
>Meh, they use them anyway.
>Use postgres for everything because i am a huge contrarian fuck and just wanted to use it to spite MySqlfags and SQLdrones
>Suddenly the internet is gone
>Like fucking everywhere
>OH FUCK
>Only IT guy in house
>I am a measly dev not a fucking network sage
>Our Sys Admin was fired because they caught him using our connection to torrent a hitomi tanaka megapack
>Entire fucking team of "engineers" that dictates this shithole comes rushing to my cave inside the server room
>"user OPEN THE FUCK UP WHAT DID YOU DO TO THE INTERNET YOU FUCKING GREMLIN"
>"Jesus , Allah , Buddha , Hitler , waifu for the love of god get the internet running back on".
>They get inside like rabid dogs
>"THE ENTIRE FUCKING FLOOR HAS NO INTERNET WHY THE FUCK DO WE EVEN PAY YOU"
>about to explain that i am not the fucking sys admin but i really need this job
>"Ok i will do the needful , yes?"
>They smirk at my pajeet impersonation and give me half an hour to do it
>Fuck
>Start running trace routes like a nigger does lines of coke off a whore's ass.
>They arent getting past the gateway
>Fuck damn it
>Start pinging straight from the router
>No response
>Hear some sirens.
>God please kill me before the cops come.
>They were ambulances
>Turns out some nigger crashed a truck against a pole and brought down the internet connection for the entire park because our cabling is older than this factory and absolute shit.
>Inform what happened and now they are even more pissed but at least not towards me.
>Crawl back into my den inside the server room and finish watching Gundam Thunderbolt.

>yet not a single basketball american working there

Black "people" literally don't matter though. They are literally not human and I unironically believe this. Kill yourseof you dumbass coon.p

lol no who the fuck cares about a dead nigger

>wanting to remove rewards for innovation and taking risks on other people
i seriously hope you guys don't do this

>Windows 2008 R2 at latest

the fuck?

enjoy your one year of use I guess shits no longer supported next January, and if you work anywhere with any kind of regulation good luck migrating.

>>Our Sys Admin was fired because they caught him using our connection to torrent a hitomi tanaka megapack
>>Crawl back into my den inside the server room and finish watching Gundam Thunderbolt.
are you hiring?

This honestly

>>Start quoting up a new HPE dedicated server and ask supplier to ensure it has a fucking 25 pin serial port
that marketing genius needs to be shot. i would make it my business that these hacks got fired just for being this retarded.

get fucked, faggot. just because you work in a fucking woeful job (or don't work at all - most likely) doesn't mean others have to experience your shitty existence.

fuck off boomer

i'm trying to get my company to migrate to GSuite. Anyone done that before?

Why are tech workers so physically lazy?
We had 2 guys come in to install upgrades and they had to move the new equipment around on a pallet and it was literally a huge ordeal for them. They even allocated themselves half an hour at the end to re stack their pallet, put some plastic wrap on it and throw their rubbish away. Literally would have been a 2 minute job for one of our employees. But watching their onions filled, neckbeard bodies struggle with it was amusing.

why did you let two doughy techs stack a pallet? I used to run trucks before I did IT and stacking pallets isn't something a couple of guys with no experience should be doing, ever.

No you fuck off, zoomer

deployment on a friday afternoon

Not this week, but couple of months back.
We have couple of databases backed up daily on some server rack in small datacenter and on our office machine (just in case). Some time ago those external servers just shat the bed and clear out all databases and backups. Fortunately we had our own copies so we've lost "just" about 12h worth of data.
Later we found out that RAID controller for those disks fucked up and decided to just clear ALL data just because. We also found out that our admins ignore the fact that this piece of shit was giving false positives for failed hdds for the last 6 months.
Long story short, we told them to fuck off and move to OVH.

>But it's just a statement of facts.
This is exaclty what makes it redundant. It's not something one should even question, so there's no reason to write it down. It's like saying "The world is round", "Water is wet".

>Our Sys Admin was fired because they caught him using our connection to torrent a hitomi tanaka megapack
Based and redpilled

I bought a raspberry pi zero and had trouble getting it to work due to a faulty sd card

Israel, not technology

>Our Sys Admin was fired because they caught him using our connection to torrent a hitomi tanaka megapack
10/10

Attached: 1549141841117.png (400x506, 277K)

What monitor he is using in the bottom of the pic, that Dell.
I want something else and I am looking for a 1600x1200 monitor or 1920x1200

i keep losing my flashdrive
>leave it in a computer forget about leave , never see it again.

Fuck niggers and fuck you
Black Lives Splatter

I miss my private office.
Be server admin... most things automated by me
Play vidya on the big ass TV in my room.
Other admins drone fights.
They cant get rid of us because they know packets are awful.

Someones pc in the office keeps bluescreening and i cant figure out why. Im pretty sure its driver related though, and since hes stuck on Windows 8 i think ill just upgrade him to 10 to kill two birds with one stone.

Also i left my laptop charger there over the weekend. It wouldnt be a big deal since i have two laptops, but all my work shit is on the one with no charger so I cant do any of the work I was planning to.

Our workplace in house IT has been castrated. I work for state government. State has a central IT branch that oversees the rest of the different state departments in the exec branch.

So say some dude in the Transportation building has a computer that just shits itself. The process to get that taken care of is one long chain. A ticket is filled out via call or e-mail. Central IT branch logs it and puts it in a bin. Sooner or later some other dude from that branch will show up at the transportation building and take care of the problem. This may take several weeks before central IT dude shows up. Both buildings (Central IT and Transportation is in same city and only maybe 8 miles apart).

Meanwhile the in house castrated IT is right there on site.

I don't work in IT at all but that's the process as told to me by some dude who does work in IT.

stuck in small town medium sized office and the biggest emergency was when the new computers ive been pushing for for a year or two now froze during an update and I almost got fired because of it.

Private sector is no better.
We're a third and last company down the subcontractor chain, providing services for a local branch of large tax conulting corp.
Foolishly we gave away our cell phone numbers and get calls every time something dies, yet cannot act, without them making a ticket via proper channel, much to everyone's annoyance. If it's not a major server issue it takes two days at least to process a request.

The funniest are jobs we do for other subcontractors, like this one research institute. Last time a disk died in one of their machines, it took three weeks to replace. I send a price of new disk + service to our mother company, they send it to clients mother company for evaluation, they in turn send acceptance down to their local branch, which sends it back to our mother comp and finally to me.

Attached: obelix.jpg (241x161, 13K)

bad ram maybe?

So yesterday there was some remote network maintenance happening at one of our main data centers, and someone fucks up *one switch* and knocks out all international sites and the VPN for 2-3 hours. The dumbasses get it back but then an hour later knock it out AGAIN but somehow made it worse this time including the mainframe and it's ability to communicate with other application servers.

It was a fucking mess and somehow they managed to not call it a severe incident...

Bonus points: It was people at an India site doing the maintenance.

We had one of our DC techs have an issue while swapping out a dead SSD in an array. Instead of alerting the appropriate response team, he proceed to secure erase all of the disks and repave the entire box.

I work for a cloud hosting company, and this dude single handily deleted 200~ VMs. Thank god for console logs showing the dude panicked and nuked the node.

This, it's great being salaried.

>oy vey work harder for your overlords goy no talking allowed code monkey
kys

>arguing against your own interests
your boss doesn't give a shit about you, they just need us to collectively make them billions in profits a year and give us back a few peanuts so we can eat and continue to generate money for them

>security team sent an alert to my team (sysadmins) about a potentially infected email >header on email was from 2009
>had a printer driver .exe attachment
>neither employee was still working there and we were archiving their emails over the network & tripped a splunk rule
>explain this to them
>they still demand to analyze the email

awesome work gang

Attached: brainlet skull.png (488x463, 59K)

cursed image

Client employee ran an SSIS on live thinking it was UAT, then complained UAT was broken.

Office humour

Open office space is not about increasing productivity, but about forcing employees to socialize.
The company wants you to make good friends with your coworkers so you:
>don't leave for another job
>feel pressured to perform to gain social status
>don't end up killing yourself and/or the rest of the company

some windows update broke access to our compilers floating license server a week and a half ago, last week we figured out a fix by deleting some shit in the windows registry
more than a week was spent where no one was able to do work

The intern was deleting userfiles at random and it managed to sync up to this garbage cloud storage program we use, deleting all our data

I restored it from backup but it was a pain in the dick. The look on his face was priceless when we noticed all our data just disappearing

>ISP changes our public IP and fucks our intranet
>calls them and they answered "not our fault bro! FUCK YOU HAHA "
>Has to manually re-configure things for 2 days

fucking END ME.

Not necessarily an emergency , but we were working with a guy and asked him to describe his network topology...he didn't have a diagram so just free-moused it using MSpaint without using any of the text/line/box tools.

Pic is the resulting masterpiece

Attached: masterpiece.jpg (1026x1088, 248K)

i've seen something like this before. lol

Take this to lereddit

one of the projects got infected with some emotet shit. My team had to re-image 200 PCs in 8h and that was the easy part...

No, it's just cheaper, more people in the same area. Office space is expensive.

I was given shit like this from an old school admin that drew it by hand. "Hey, you have visio right? Can you make this for me?" Worst part of it all is I had to request visio for another project, basically was a fight just to get approved and a month went by to get it. No one in the whole IT department had it, because the version was so old no one could find the key anymore to reinstall. Once I did it for the admin, he sent me 20 more and asked for the same. I did it and clocked it as work so didnt care much, then he asked me how to use the new visio he just installed. Guy made 4x more than me, but sure, whatever. This was last year.

IOS upgrade gone bad

>pushed new IOS with cisco prime to all 3850 switches
>when reloaded some come up
>others don't
>reload scheduled. at. three. fucking. AM.
>packages.conf file is pointing to .pkg's that are nowhere to be found on the NVRAM
>old IOS version .pkgs are still on the switch, except the old packages.conf pointing to them
>decide to downgrade back to old version so I can go back to sleep
>boot usbflash0:cat3k...bin
>lights come back up
>winrar