*breaths in*

Why does it lie?
>unable to start car
lying bitch, it could start the car just fine until now, why is it suddenly "unable to"?

TESLAKEKS BTFO

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>if any car, ICE or EV, ever exists in a state where it can start, it will be able to start forever no matter what

>dont have autopilot

many normal cars are also vulnerable but manufacturers can’t/won’t update key fobs. There are tons of software vulnerabilities in normal cars today that never get fixed. Granted, none of them are so critical your car should refuse to start.

You do realize it could just disable autopilot instead of disabling literally everything?

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Maybe let them start the car but disable autopilot until they do the update?

>Blocks your path

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>No, you may not drive today.

It's happening.

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Why is the fix a sudden new patch when the car ran just fine without it seconds before the patch was made live?

autopilot is just an example. There could be issues with cruise control or something that cannot be easily disabled. The point is, anything life threatening should be treated this way.

ahahahahhahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahhaahahhahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

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You are assuming lots of things because you have no understanding how modern vehicles work. Most modern cars, EV or gasoline powered, can find themselves in this scenario. In my experience in the industry it's most commonly caused by someone replacing a module on the CAN bus that allows the engine to start, in which case some kind of initialization or VIN learn procedure needs to be done for the rest of the modules to recognize it, or a rodent has eaten some wiring so the car has no communication to a module required for the engine to start. Since Tesla does updates constantly I'm sure if someone were to replace some component on the car it would then almost certainly be on a different version, same as if some kind of damage or power problem happened in the middle of a software update that resulted in different modules being on different versions. If you want to guarantee software cannot result in a no-start you'll have to go somewhere before 1973 or so depending on the manufacturer. If you want to ensure an electrical problem can't cause a problem overnight you will need to go to a crank start, magneto fired engine circa 1910. Outside of that, every car is at risk of a no start even though "nothing happened" (that you know of) overnight.

Just a minor technical question, how does it know?

My botnet Onkyo surround receiver has given me the "Update available" message twice (it would still play music just fine). The easy solution to make it stop was to unplug the Ethernet interface (and it doesn't have wifi password).

Can't Tesla owners do the same? Or have they built 4G/5G into it so you can't disable this? I have the impression 5G is all about that kind of control as well as population control and microwave genocide.

manuals are dying breed, sadly. fucking normalfags ruin everything.

>how does it know
Stop assigning magical properties to cars. "It" isn't a sentient being, and it doesn't have anything to do with cell connectivity. Every vehicle made outside of kit cars since 1994-96 uses CAN bus, which is a series of modules communicating with each other. They all have some sort of pre flight check to make sure when a car is started they can communicate with each other properly (you will recognize this as when all your warning lights are on when you first turn your key). If a safety critical module to engine operation does not receive or recognize an expected message from another the car will not start.

It wants more charge because the holes in the battery want more electrons to move into them, and the motor itself works because electrons want to move to the place with least potential.

My 20 year old manual shitbox doesn't have this problem.

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This is why I ride a motorcycle. Shit doesn’t even have a fuel gauge, gotta keep it in your head.

Yes, Teslas have a 3G or 4G modem. They're using AT&T as a provider in the US, I think. You can disconnect the cell antenna, but as far as I know can't turn off the modem itself (i.e. there is no airplane mode). Sadly, this is not unique to Tesla.

just get a normal car that does not have any computer shit in it.

Electronically automated vehicles should be illegal. They're too easy for people to hack and kill people with.

it has some drm thing that wont let it start without a network connection

>Shit doesn’t even have a fuel gauge
Now that's just silly. What if you're in the middle of nowhere and run out of gas?

I wouldn’t try it, three days ago some chap got banned for posting Android btfo.

Non electronically automated vehicles should be illegal. They're too easy for people to hack and kill people with. Anyone could just walk up to one and cut the brake lines and there would be no electronic safety system to check the brakes aren't compromised.

how about you try to press the brake pedal before starting the car and if it doesnt come back to initial position then your brake lines are messed up?
or try applying a handbrake to see if it still works
or just put the car in gear and in worst case scenario you can slow down and stop by downshifting

>Electronically automated vehicles should be illegal. They're too easy for people to hack and kill people with.

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Please user, you can only get so cucked.

>Anyone could just walk up to one and cut the brake lines and there would be no electronic safety system to check the brakes aren't compromised.
But you can easily check that by testing the brakes at the start. You can't hack a non auto car while it's already on the move without something like a bomb. A hack is easier to cover up.

>not man
>not machine
>but an anteater-man-machine-man

Is this fucking real? lmao no way

Wrong. You're talking out of your league. You won't notice the affect on the brakes until the fluid level drops below where the actuating piston is. A modern car that monitors brake pressure, deceleration, wheel speeds, and brake actuation distance could trivially detect when the pressure is too low for given actuation distance, or brake pressure is not providing the expected deceleration rate.

a manual will deny shifts as well to protect against monkeys shoving it into 1st at high speeds or reverse

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You know what pisses me off the most?

I graduated college last year, and I decided I was going to buy a new car because I was tired of driving shitboxes. I have always wanted a TDI Jetta. Obviously that wasn't going to happen. I still like the Jetta though, so i head to a dealer and I walk in and say I want order a brand new Jetta, heres $2000 down. So we get to work on the order forms, and I talk to the gentleman and we go over trim levels and options and I say I'd like the SE (mid level) trim with a manual: he says not possible. Im confused and I'm like well I want leather, heated seats and a manual so can I add leather to the S? No. Cannot order anything other than base model with manual. I ended up calling VWoA and investigating. Im honest with the lady, I will buy a BRAND NEW VW right now if I can have a manual on the SE or SEL trims (or even R-Line). Nope, they are not sold in America that way. I found out talking to her if I lived in Canada or Mexico I could order the car any options at all, but Americans only have package options. So fucking dumb, VW has engineered the SEL with a manual and tested it to north american safety standards but im literally not allowed to buy it because im a burger. So fucking outrageous. Who would buy the cloth seat basemodel with a manual? Then the manufacturers turn around and say see no one bought the manual!

I ended up buying used 15 TDI manual SE for about half of what I was going to spend.

In worst case there is a reserve valve which prevents you for accidentally emptying your tank and gives you a few miles to find a gas station.
But it’s more about getting a feel for how fast you are using gasoline and planning ahead of time, which you have to get used to if you want to ride a motorcycle daily anyway.

learn to measure by dip I guess, like how olde timey gas stations use to manage fuel height in tanks. not sure if bikers are cool enough to do that though.

I dont know about first gear but you can definitely shift to second going at pretty much any speed, obviously at high speed it will fuck up the gear box

why does it even ask to update? if it has 4G connection it could just update in background and dont bother user with this shit

e.g. if they dont even have a choice to not update why bother asking

Reminder that the Jews at (((Daimer))) lobbied the US government to passing a law that prevents the importing of cars for the first 25 years of their existance under the guise of "safety standards" because they were assblasted Burgers were importing their cars from Germany on the cheap.

blame blumpf for not zeroing auto tariffs.

yeah, i feel you, man.

well second yes, depending on the transmission and engine you can go at least 40+ in second gear (maxing revs most likely) but first is really only meant to get off the ground so they make sure you dont bomb your tranny thinking you shifted to 3rd but it was actually first

>critical bug found
>have to update for security reasons
The only thing wrong with this is that it doesn't update automatically

>wanting a jetta
what is wrong with you?

Why would you have a transmission on an electric car anyway

That is literally wrong and basically saying you have zero understanding of how manual works. So you reach your max speed on second gear? top kek

Yeah and VW sells the jetta cheaper in Mexico so they would NEVER give me a letter of substantial similarity so i could buy it there and import it because if one person does it then everyone can and (((they))) would lose market-adjusted value

Why would you want shit travel range and fillups (well recharges in your case) that take longer than a few minutes?

>>Having an electric car
Pleb shit.

>wanting an (((electric))) car that has half the lifetime of a ICE car
its like you want the planet to die
if they had it their way people would be upgrading to a new car every year the same way people buy a new phone

Why can't they just swap out the batteries at fuel stations?
What happened to hydrogen cars?

So you can't monitor brake pressure hydraulically? Pretty sure once owned a car that could do that.

Why would you want to have to go to gas stations and spend 5x as much to travel a given range instead of having a full tank every morning, just for the convenience of driving more than 300 miles at a time with slightly shorter breaks, something .01% of the population does regularly?

its not wrong, you can reach high speed then find out the brakes arent working and downshift gradually

You fucking retards do know that is not a electric car, but an ICE car, right? God you Jow Forums retards know nothing about cars. Go outside once in a while, you turds.

holy shit you're such a fucking retard
you need to go back to whatever shithole you came from

I wasn't talking about that car, just electric cars in general

Brakes have nothing to do with what I'm talking about. KYS

Yeah, blame him for not doing what Australia did - losing a car industry.

No infrastructure, almost only one manufacturer pursues the idea.

Electric cars got basic infrastructure everywhere already.

obviously why would electric even need gearbox or even transmission if each wheel has a motor

(cont'd)
Also, batteries are what the manufacturers want you to own.

WHY.
Fuck I bet the elites just bought it out to remove competition to oil too.

what exactly are you talking about?

>Why can't they just swap out the batteries at fuel stations?
That or gas-electric/diesel-electric are the only ways I see electric cars working. Liquid fuel just has far greater energy density.

>Why would you want to have to go to gas stations and spend 5x as much to travel a given range instead of having a full tank every morning
Because you're marginalizing how often long distance travel happens. I may not drive 300 miles every day but I sure as hell am glad it only takes ~5 minutes to get a full tank after doing so.
>slightly shorter
A Model S takes ~8-10h for a full recharge

No shit, sherlock

>needing a dip stick
just slosh the tank around a bit and you can gauge how full it is.

swapping batteries is retarded no manufacturer would ever want to do this, the costs are simply far too high, and they would have to own your batteries, they dont want to, they want you to have to buy a new set every 5 years when they've all gone to shit and have half the range

I just wanted hydrogen powered cyberpunk motorcycles. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR?

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>if I just make stuff up I win!
Sorry, you're an idiot. A Model S takes 30 minutes to full charge on a supercharger.
>Because you're marginalizing how often long distance travel happens. I may not drive 300 miles every day
sample size of one. Nobody cares about what you do, and most people don't have a room temperature IQ like you and make their car purchasing decisions on what their normal use for the car is, not something they do once a year.

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no an intelligent person would never buy an electric car to begin with

Or MAYBE they could ship a product that works on delivery instead of needing to be fixed after the customers do the QC they should be doing themselves.

Not happening until software is subject to the same scrutiny as other engineering disciplines.

But it is, through engineering disciplines...

Tesla is literally the automotive equivalent to Apple.
Fucking dipshits

>>if I just make stuff up I win!
>Sorry, you're an idiot. A Model S takes 30 minutes to full charge on a supercharger.
Googled it and was skimming, I accidentally went with the 220V charge time instead of 440. Still fucking pathetic compared to filling up a gas tank.
>sample size of one. Nobody cares about what you do, and most people don't have a room temperature IQ like you and make their car purchasing decisions on what their normal use for the car is, not something they do once a year.
I make my car purchasing decisions based on all my uses of a car. If it inconveniences me several times a year it's enough to take into consideration.

based AF

Good on the mods. It's only APPL BTFO

What's to stop you from buying it in Canada and driving it over?

There are no national agencies in most (any?) to review software quality as is done with automotive, electrical, construction etc. As long as the software component appears to be working, no further scrutiny is given until something really bad happens. And even then, companies can get away with it, just look at equifax.

youtu.be/kNLiEtdol0w?t=35
shiiiiiiit

HAAAAAHAHAGGAAA

>Why can't they just swap out the batteries at fuel stations?
Turns out it's too much hassle for too little gains.
Fast charging is basically good enough, and is very simple to roll out because it's all self-service.

>What happened to hydrogen cars?
It's an utter meme.

Hydrogen is more expensive per km than gasoline and you cannot full up at home.
So it's the negative aspects of electric combined with the negative aspects of gasoline.

The oil industry is the only one pushing hydrogen because 99% of hydrogen is made from fossil fuels.

Electric cars (should) last a lot longer than ICE cars.
They require hardly any maintenance as well.

Although you might have to recycle the battery every 200.000km or so.

>ib4 your iCar is throttled as battery ages

underrated

Fuck manuals. Stick shift genocide best day of my life.

If you drive a Canadian car over to the US and you're not visiting, it's still considered an import and has to go through customs.

Yeah but wouldn't it just be a regular jetta as far as they're concerned?