ITT: Jow Forums designs a luxury technology house

Your father Jezo Bezos just died and you bought this house with the inheritance.
What does it look like inside? What technology do you fill it with?

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Bitch, I'm rich. Just hire a maid and secretary to do all that for me.

But they can't read your mind.

Owner of that house obviously can't afford Windex.

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Ive got my dream house already in mind.

>huge secluded block somewhere cold and isolated.
>large wall around perimeter, at least 10m tall, cobblestone.
>house is made with energy efficiency in mind; positioned rooms based on the way the sun moves, many solar panels and grey water tanks, water filtration and fish ponds. triple glazed windows
>my own alexa style assistant made by me, linked to every local device but on its own lan, not connected to the net at all. controls literally everything; ovens, water, tempereture.
>locks are all manual though
>electricity goes off in one wing of the house when i go to sleep, no coil whine from anything at all thank you
>no pool but a lake and a forest. ideally a hotspring as well
>interior and exterior is heavily japanese inspired, sliding doors and room spacing so that you cant hear other people, etc
>0 plastic. absolutely no plastic anywhere in the house except wiring covers.
idk, not much else i want, low tech but close with nature.

Mini split air conditioners in every room, so amerifats get confused.

>Mini split air conditioners in every room, so amerifats get confused.
why not just a reverse cycle zoned ducted aircon?

Ducts don't confuse Americans.
Ductless do confuse them, especially multi-split ones.

oh man theyre so unslightly though, seriously you can get some nice out of sight ducts.

Convection air conditioner (patent pending)

interesting, i can imagine overengineering an in ground refridgeration system that would game both though. and then some humidity regulators

Basically, it is plain old radiator, but with tray for condensate and mounted on ceiling.

I would never buy that. Far too open.
>Buy 5000+ acres in Montana woodland
>Build home with reinforced everything, able to withstand any natural disaster and then some at the top of a high hill
>All walls are lined with the latest and greatest bulletproof tech along side the normal insulation of course
>Doors are bulletproof
>Magnetic locks that require biometric ID's to open
>Cameras absolutely everywhere. Hardwired to private fiber optic lines I had privately run. Night vision, infrared, thermal
>A Server room to govern all of this inside a Faraday cage
>Best solar panels money can buy with gigantic battery backups.
>rain collection/water filtration system/internal grow house for food and water. Able to survive 2 years alone in this house if need be with no outside assistance
>Personal drone fleet to survey my land
>Build all of this AGAIN in underground bunker form in an unmarked location only I know somewhere out on my property.
>Enough guns, ammo, and supplies to fix/make more ammo to make our own military blush.
>Literally enough to have it so the US military is customer #1 on the ammo list with my ghost companies being #2 through #5. (would never use real name to buy all this stuff of course)

I don't like people. I don't trust people. Especially government works and ABC agencies.

>Metal framing
>Thick insulation, even in internal walls
>Trippe glass panels glued on metal framing, just like they do on cars.
>No windows to open
>Sophisticated ventilation (since windows are shut close) and HVAC, including heat-pump air conditioner
>Doors like in airplane, which make air tight seal
>LED lighting
>Solar and air-conditioner heated water

Also B787-like blinds.

This.

a nice shack in the mountains with zero technology

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>Also B787-like blinds.
They're only a few hundred dollars a square foot. And you can get them in any color!

Jow Forums's ideal house is a self sufficient nuclear bunker built on that patch of unclaimed land in the Sahara

>Also B787-like blinds.
god why would you want these?

>in the Sahara
so close

>They're only a few hundred dollars a square foot.
But that is a luxury house. Pleb version will have 80% transparent tints and that's it.
Imagine pushing button, instead of moving a thing.

You're right. On some unclaimed island in international waters.

>Imagine pushing button, instead of moving a thing.
oh for that reason. you coulda just said automatic curtains

But how you'd adjust transparency with curtains or blinds?

well yeah that too, that shits not worth it imo, even at $0 id rather block out drapes. i wonder how much noise it makes to sustain the current (im autismo about coil whine and the like). also the gel cant go 100% block out.

I want to buy some old ruins somewhere and restore them to their original look, but make the inside design modern, ergonomic, and easily upgraded. The idea of an ancient stone building with an interior fit for modern life pleases me.

>i wonder how much noise it makes to sustain the current
It is luxury house, so no chink inductors are allowed.

thats something i never considered. having noise sensitivity and having a light fitting with coil whine was a nightmare. worse yet many other noises

Neither can a "smart house"

I'd rather live in a Yurt, like Genghis Khan, than have to deal with disgusting bourgeois faggots all day. Unless I am firing arrows at them with my pals.

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my nigger knows whats good

top kek at the ammo parts

We don't use voice assist to control things, we use punch cards with programs written by us or other people in the open source community that we slot into the wall or whatever that processes what we want within 24 hours and then turns our light bulbs on for example

RGB on fucking everything, every appliance, wall, ceiling, door and window. Stupidly high powered fans, three per room and a giant fuck off water cooling radiator covering each outside wall - with rgb lights on it. Also the front gate and garage doors are tempered glass.

This house is an eyesore. It's trying to be both grand and stately, and also modern at the same time, and failing at both.

I'd demolish that eyesore tbqh

Very nice. I already made my own home management system too, just need the house :3

Also replaced all my plastic items with wood, glass or stainless steel, straws included.

All I need is a Nomad Cube.
It would sit on an elevated mound of dirt, with stairs into a vast basement connected to a 6 car garage, my driveway would come out the side of that mound of dirt and loop around to the front of my property.

It would have excellent thermal properties and sound dampening under that dirt.

The only thing I would ponder about is that if it's feasible to maintain a moat around the property and if it should have a drawbridge.

I pinch myself, sell it and buy a $100mn apartment in NYC instead.

Wait... The house is the crawl space under a house?

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based
fuck plastic honestly

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yikes! enjoy living in a fucking greenhouse

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Make the glass one way mirrors and it's OK

>billionaire son
>buys a tiny shitty house
bitch please

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lol and thats any better?

Probably just some large but reasonable priced ranch in Texas so that I can live the rest of my life and still give some inheritance and freedom to my kids at the end.
The last thing I would ever want to do is bring someone into this world and then put them through a lifetime of work for no reward. I know work builds character or whatever but if I have any choice my kids will do absolutely none of it.

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>constantly climbing stairs
have fun

they only work during the day though

Absolutely based

i would sell that stupid sunny house and move into normie-friendly mcmansion near my workplace. it would be mainly empty, i don't really want or need anything more than i have now (other than my own home)

It's unclaimed, but only until someone builds a nuclear bunker on it.

no i like water

I sell it and get a nice little cottage in a sleepy seaside town.

Jesus Christ have fun living in that. You will go insane.

yanks really have no taste

>Living in an Uncharted multiplayer deathmatch arena

I would never have bought that postmodern eyesore of a house.

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I'd buy a medieval castle and renovate it with modern technology without intruding on the aesthetics of the place
Natural thermal baths are mandatory

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i wouldnt design a house like that. it looks like a posh car park

Ivy and other clinging plants terrify me. That shit digs deep through and into concrete. They don't gaf. Those walls are absolutely fucked and are basically pocked with holes from the outside in. That whole house is nothing but a giant bug-infested moisture trap now.

I'd live in a varg style simple home in the forest.
Couple thinkpads and a desktop. no cell phone but maybe some type of ebook reader. I have a kindle but I hate amazon

I'd build a wooden house using the Holz100 method.

youtube.com/watch?v=yrI4ykDSjiQ

How would you get your internet? Rural internet is extremely expensive in the UK, and the coverage is very patchy. I don't know how it works elsewhere.

Hughes, satellite internet, the latency is bad but it works fine

Yeah that's what I mean. Satellite internet is extremely expensive.

It's only around $70/month

At my house no.ideally I'd go somewhere near by once a week or so to get updates, download things from youtube etc.

Sounds pretty cool desu

>not connected to the net at all

Doesn't matter if any of your shit's running wirelessly. If it's running on RF you're fucked dude. Go analog.