Be a software engineer

>be a software engineer
>make $200k/yr
>work 5 hours a day
all you gays complaining about this career are absolutely laughable

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Be quiet you fool or else they'll find out. Engineers bitching during crunch time has convinced everybody including managers that we are overworked, undervalued superheroes. I go home every day at 2:30 in the afternoon and spend most of my workday surfing the net or working on my novel. I do maybe 3 hours of real work in a week.

I make 160k/y.

how2become software engineer?

While the job is very lenient, the schooling usually required to get there tends to be unforgiving. Part of what makes it easy is that (good universities) over prepare their students.

bust your nuts in a CS program in college, secure internship / connections while in school, get hired, enjoy never doing anything remotely as hard as your CS coursework

even when it's crunchtime and you have to work 80 hours in one week that's maybe once in a year and it's not even difficult most of the time, just tedious

I don't feel like going to school

>dumb frogposter making 6 figures
your NEETbux will never accumulate up to that value, retard

Then you probably will never make 6 figures. Food service is usually available.

i make 6 figures with a government clearance + intermediate certs. never went to college

info Sec? only reason I'm asking is because I'm in that field (B.S in comp sci with a minor in computing sec. ) but all of my co workers are from that background. A lot of military too.

im a game dev for a AAA studio, about 4 years on since graduation, and today this career actually broke me. I've been playing catch up over the last few sprints where tasks just kept spilling over and over and I could never get ahead of anything. We started a new sprint and I had a task left over that I was struggling to finish.
Almost there, thought I was ready, made one final change that QA needed and the entire feature fell apart because of an unforseen requirement. I tried to make a change, couldn't get my shit to launch (would compile and run just not work). Backed up to the previous commit, still wouldn't.
I just broke and started crying and I feel awful about it

govt clearance + CS degree + certs = the true redpill

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I switched from technical game dev (i.e. CS for babbies) to actual CS and took legit R&D jobs because I saw how fucking awful the work environment is for game developers. Now I'm at a FAANG company getting free food and coffee daily working alongside high performing chad programmer frens where we all are cranking out software that makes my company fat loot while I receive a comically huge compensation package in return. I make small code changes that increase performance or add features and all my coworker give me a pat on the back while I click a button to push to production, and then I leave the office around 3:30pm to go draw/socialize/hang out with people.

I have too much imposter syndrome to try to get another job. I'm already struggling so much with this code base I cant even imagine trying to get onto another, let alone ever getting through a programming test.

>6:45 wake up
>shower and get ready
>7:15 leave to work
>7:20 arrive at work
>grab my water and relax for a little on my phone
>7:45 go to my desk
>browse Jow Forums and reddit, plan PC build, bread recipes and read on other hobbies
>11:45 go to get my lunch before the rush
>1:10 return to my desk
>continue browsing but with emphasis on learning and reading (science/health, environment, politics, economics)
>3:45 pack up and hand in keys at security
>relax in the security office and phonepost
>4:00 leave work
>4:05 get home
I may only make $60k a year but that's more than enough to support my lifestyle and hobbies. love being completely stress free

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>live in southern state
>work 3rd shift IT at hospital two days a week
>12 hour shifts of shitposting on Jow Forums
>$30 an hour
>5 days off a week

feels good, man.

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What kind of work requires no work exactly?

building management at a dead site, with a manager who is so braindead I can talk him back out of my building the moment he arrives for reports/updates

>imposter syndrome
Fuck outta here with that normie faggotry

How do I get a job like that

Have your older brother be the manager. That's how I did it.

It's not fair man

if you're in california, you're on foodstamps with that salary lmfao

>make 200k in silicon valley
>bascially poor

Lol try again. I love in an inexpensive tier 2 city that's literally half the price of silicon valley while making SV money.

The funny thing is having a professional conscience like this in a non-professional industry full of idiots can prove useful, make sure you don't drown in it though.

I make 120k/yr in an average area, so I got wayyyyy more spending money than you do. maybe some day you'll grow a spine and move east.

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My yearly retirement savings is higher than your entire income.

what if I never secured internships/connections in school and have been a job searching neet for months? also my cs work wasn't "hard" at all which is the problem because we didn't learn anything relevant to these real world job requirements

Same. My program was all C++, but mostly just formal analysis and pseudocode. Jobs in my area are asking about shit like R, Apache, Hadoop, SQL, and all this other shit I never used, despite being a 3.9 GPA CS and Math double major.

Just teach yourself
>schooling
>college

>be software developer
>earn $4 per hour
>have to read tons of shitty legal documentation
>have to deal with corporate bullshit nonstop
>want to kill myself
truly an amazing field

I do live on the east. And no, not NYC.

>programmer
>Chad
Uhh

i miss my overnight helldesk job at smol hospiitol

CIA