How long would it take a NEET who has all day to study to learn how to program well enough to get a job programming...

I'm not really sure what lie you are planning to tell, you mean like fake work experience or credentials? Depends what kind of area as well. Look at jobs online and what skills they are advertising for and learn those skills for the area you want to go into, and then you might eventually end up with that kind of job.

Why are you being so hostile?

>fake work experience or credentials
Basically

because you're retarded neet and have to receive a wake up call

I'm trying to get a job though.

ITT: moralfags

If you're properly motivated and you have a triple-digit IQ, I'd say a year.

Nobody's hiring you to do fizzbuzz.

You sound extremely underage.
He's right.

By lying. That's an important modifier.

Well I'm not

You're a neet not because of a lack of skill but rather a lack of maturity.
>willing to lie to an employer to get a job you wont be able to keep
>sees no issue with this
I'm also willing to bet you're autistic as well.

who cares you fucking wagecuck LMAO
keep brown-nosing your manager's hairy asshole

I think you made his point for him.

and you are a faggot cuck who is loyal to a corporation

As do most full-time students. And opposed to you, they have an institution full of experts backing them up in their venture.

I don't know, all I can say is look at some jobs online and then learn the skills. Learn a basic programming language thoroughly through textbook and then learn the accompanying skills (front end frameworks for example) online through the official documentation. It might be hard to lie since people often ask for references (though not always - big companies will but small-medium size might not)

Just focus on learning the important parts of the job description of the job you want to get. Maybe contribute some open source as well. Just so you can learn git and collaboration

Also I would say that it probably is possible to bullshit experience and credentials, as long as you know the credentials people will want to hire you since the job market for developers is strong, lots of companies want to hire.

>as long as you know the credentials
I meant to say skills, not credentials

but yeah many companies need good devs badly

Ty.I sm s hard worker very conscientious but just was a dumb neet most my life.

We all make mistakes man, gl.

Yeah one other thing is that if you have low confidence in your own ability recruiters will pick up on that so make sure during the interview you try to sound confident

Thanks a gain.I meant I'm a pretty hard worker btw.Just messed up that post ironically.

why would you want to be a programmer? terrible salaryman tier work culture, terrible hours, steadily decreasing pay and increase competition

Better than retail.And office jobs seem about as hellish.Atleast a creative programmer could make some software to make money off.

honestly, if you made a couple of decent software projects that would be challenging to make? 2 years of consolidated experience and I wouldn't mind putting you to work.

Lying is the only way to get an entry level dev job these days. Especially if you have no work history or references. Grow the fuck up you delusional faggots.

6 months to a year for a junior position, then work 2 more years and jump ship to a senior opening in another company, with an extra 50% pay raise.
Repeat every 2-4 years.

Recruiters all need to die. Preferably slowly and painfully.

You talk so much about programming, but you cant talk about hacking because you cant actually do anything. I run a hacked network of computers that I programmed to click on googles ads in my secret website. I even write my own viruses to make people get hacked into my network. I work at home and have a bunch of screens showing me what people on my network are doing on their screens. I can even set it so that i can see the code of their computers. can you guys do any of that? I dont think so. I bet you dont know where all the websites real hackers hang out are either? if you name them, I just might tell them that marshviperX sent you.

Is that legal?I'd like a legal job mr tripfag.

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>mfw i dont have financial, job, or educational problems

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The real question is how can I manage to spend all day studying something that I'm bad at

Try to achieve something. For example I found it useful to make stuff that actually helped me a lot.

Keep in mind these are just in PowerShell and I'm currently converting them to c#.
1. I have a PowerShell script running as a service that checks disk space every hour and e-mails me when quotas set in json config files are met. (I don't like doing this with a PS script but it works flawlessly - uses 42 MB of RAM, c# will probably drop that down a fair way as well)
2. A weekly Windows Server backup status e-mail
3. Triggered by a number of Windows Server backup event id's another script is run that sends through the error. So within a few seconds of the backup failing I get notified.

1 week or 2 if you work on at least 8-10 hours a day of grinding through projecteuler, hackerrank, leetcode and the like. the time it takes you to become comfortable (proficient) is of course dependent on your previous programming knowledge, math skills, and ability to solve problems. people who are telling you 1 year are either REALLY stupid or LARPing.

but you don't need to put in that kind of effort, nor do you /really/ have to lie on your interview.

create a few bullshit wordpress themes, slap some useless changes to a bunch of forks on github, pretend like you know what you're doing. heck, just act like all the wannabes on Jow Forums. more importantly the key to success is to act in your interview like a hipster numale/stacey who is into "tech" and can "kode". you get bonus points if you tell them you know about ubuntu and its derivatives, and/or that you're hip with codes of conduct and whatever other bullshit these people care about. it's all in how you behave and your attitude, a little dunning-krueger goes a long way in getting you that next job (eg. believe that your ability to concatenate two strings is like the most fucking impressive shit ever).

this is the sad reality of the IT industry at the moment. it's not a meme that coders don't know shit, it's reality. it's why teams are built of 10 people with minimal knowledge* that could easily be replaced by 2-3 savvy programmers.

*by minimal knowledge i'm referring to shit as basic as variables, conditionals, syntax etc, the stuff that anyone can pick up in a couple of hours through a primer.

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actually based post

Don't lie. They can and many times will just check with the company you put in as work axperience if you really worked there.

Instead, think about what you want to do. Check open positiona for that and write down the requirements. Work on these.

As you don't have any experience, make yourself a portfolio showing the skills you learned - showing that you're able to do what they're asking for. This is your only chance. You have to get that forat job after that it's easy..

I can't tell iif you're bullshitting but 1 or 2 weeks sound a bit fast.
I heard about how most coders are bad theres that blog that goes on how modern programmers cannot code.Otherwise thanks!

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