Got really bored at finance desk job and browsed porn for a few minutes on Monday

I didn’t even jack off I took my lunch break and ate some cereal while watching some Lexi Belle videos.

kekd

If I'm browsing on my phone what will they know. Oh no no no no

>so addicted to porn you rationalized watching it at work
Enjoy your promotion, you retarded trash

>tfw don’t get a good enough signal in the building to browse on my phone

Of course you idiot, your every move is being monitored on that network.

You can probably convince him that someone linked you some video on there that wasn't porn, depending what they log they might not know exactly what you were on

IT departments tend to recruit informers. So if your boss asks to see the reports of which requests and where you sent through their network, they will bring him this information .. including emails incidentally

You got to be a brainlet to be in finance

feign ignorance/claim it was a virus
worked for me when I was 13

>not being the IT guy so you can look at what you want

>watch porn without jacking off
What kind of mental illness is this

If I’m so much of a brainlet then why do I make over $80k a year for a job where I have 2 hours of actual work per day? Yeah shut the fuck up bitch.

The porn thing is probably nothing. IT I probably just told him about some slowness my computer was having that I sent a help desk ticket earlier this month for.

The network keeps logs of who connected to what IP and it's pretty easy to tell what IP leads to a porn site.

Hi, I work in the IT department that identified your "unusual activities."
Yes, we tracked you to here. Don't ask about the sources and methods we use to do this.

You have just given us additional ammunition to utilize in our report.

Just a warning to be careful. We could build mountains of evidence against you if we wanted to. So I suggest you completely clean up your act and start contributing to the workplace. You might even get a promotion if you can take this initiative.

During the meeting make sure to acknowledge that you have a problem and that the event has made you realised that you NEED to turn your entire life around. You can even ask for help.

based

>make over $80k
>cant be a brainlet
Unfortunately, there is no connection between the amount of money or the social status to IQ.
The mistake that people have made throughout history, is to give the mentally retarded to progress on the hierarchical path to management..

That is the typical behaviour pattern of an elite pornography consumer.
These people are animals. They consume hours of pornography without end. Just searching for more and more.
You'd think you could make billions from them but its impossible.
They seem to have an innate ability to evade almost all attempts at profiting from their pronounced mental illness.
They don't seem to get exhausted in their efforts. Some can stay online for days. We know that either someone else (with very similar mouse-motion) must've taken over control of the computer or they are not sleeping because we can track user input activity, which is consistent and continual.

>logs
Nobody reads those logs unless there is a significant problem.
He must've been picked up by an automatic monitoring system (which does exist).

TL;DR. You're fucked OP.
Ask for a resume reference on your way out.

You're dumb (as per ), but I wouldn't have gone bitch on you. Good luck wagie.

Then why aren’t you a billionaire you brain genious?

There’s no such thing as someone with a 150 IQ making under 20k a year. Cope harder u seething poorfag

OP here boss just called again and talked to me about some financial reports that are typical day to day activities so I feel like it’s safe to assume I’m not gonna be fired. Probably a written warning or something.

Also the faggot going on about 80k is not me. I make $45k and was just really scared after that call. Probably won’t be watching porn again at work.

Wagie Wagie caught at work
Watch me as I freely jerk
Back to work now, no more porn
Please take your hands off your horn
Videos of Lexi Belle
This ones new, but you must not tell
Back to work now Wagie poo
Back to work for Mr Jew

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You sure about that, sport?

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That's messed up bro. He's just showing you how close of an eye he has on you. Better keep your belt buckled and your pants up.
That asshole could ruin your entire life at any moment by firing you. It's messed up.
I would pre-emptively quit and make him know that you DON'T appreciate all the surveillance he is conducting within the office workspace which makes it extremely uncomfortable to work in.

If he doesn't accept your resignation then you have to make him fire you. You can get one of those USB killer devices and start plugging it into all of the computers and other USB ports around the office.

Just say you were browsing an article and something accidentally redirected you there. Say it was a wtf moment of oh shit.

If it comes up...

>no such thing as someone with a 150 IQ >making under 20k a year
according to what?....
you really are an absolute tard

You gotta be dumb af to accept an income far below your capabilities. Regardless of your measured IQ.

You could be a chess grandmaster but if you live in the slums you're still just some poor cretin incapable of proper self management.

For 20 min? Sure.

Please don't fall for his bait.

You had never seen porn before so you had a seizure and passed out for about 20 minutes.

Just put the tor browser on your flash drive and do your porn browsing from there.

Call centers pay at least $20k a year, so yeah I am sure. The extremely high turnover rate is due to how shit of a job they are.

The truth is that I worked in a startup environment for five years.
12 hours 6 days a week and total intensity ..
I was fed up with this job mainly because of the retarded CEO who supposedly "managed the project"
There are so many reasons that a person with high intelligence will be pushed away ..
Human relations and such is one of them

imagine needing porn in your life. Never gonna make it

>Can you tech dweebs actually see what sites I’ve been on at work?
Of course they can, are you retarded? Did you go to some nigger high school without blocks on the computers? Getting around them was something you should have learned then.

IT guy has no reason to cover for your dumb ass and if its discovered he did he either looks incompetent or suspicious.

Thanks for the information NSA, very sad for these people.

I'm a work-from-home programmer in eastern europe, living in my own village house, surrounded by peaceful senior village people. Life's good, I made my money in big German corporations in my 20s, now I homestead and develop websites for a living.
So, no, I am not some poor cretin. There are a myriad of things more important than money, maybe Americans will understand when their coulture grows older than two hundred years and they survive communism.

>I made good money in my 20s and don't have to worry as much now
>"relax maan life isn't all about money"
Lmao, come on senpai

Oh, sorry. Good money against eastern european standards. Safely, I will still not say how much, but it was enough for the house on the hill and automated security against gypsies. Then I can also live 5 years without receiving a pay ccheck.
Anyone and everyone can do it, just do not spend money on needless items.

Lmao

Sure bro. You may be very gifted in certain ways.

But not gifted enough to avoid detrimental situations / pursuits?
If you are intelligent, then you will reflect on your situation and conceive methods to avoid the same (and similar) problem(s) in the future.
If you are really intelligent, then you will be able to effectively avert or avoid reasonably conceivable occurrences of a detrimental nature before they materialize.

If you have a highly valuable talent/skill, but lack an appropriate setting to use it, or lack certain social skills, then you (at a minimum) need to find a person who can manage you towards a fruitful situation.

>not using your phone
nigga u dumb

what a bunch of dookie, "lmao your falt, dont watch porn no more" would have said the same with fewer words

He just said that there’s no correlation, and then you ask why he isn’t rich, the low IQ is strong in this thread.

The IQ in this thread has almost reached a collective sum with triple digits.

what the fuck bro.

OPs not a Wagie tho
>he just hasn't realised it yet

I work at a financial institution as well and our IT is warned even when we plug USB drives in our stations, including our phones to charge the battery. I refuse to believe OP is genuinely surprised that network traffic is monitored. It must be bait.

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>need to find a person who can manage >you towards a fruitful situation.
no i just need to be left alone and do my job...
With no distractions or a new game plan built on sheer stupidity..

>Probably won’t be watching porn again at work.
>Probably

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Is this shit a LARP ?

Depends on the IT. All firewalls have http/http rules that can flag for address' (usually porn is just a block) but it could be an email alert.

My IT doesn't monitor browsing at all excluding the default blocks sometimes enable for some companies.

Tell him you left the session open while you were gone to eat

>boss just called again
just making sure you aint slacking/jacking off on your last day, pissing in the office plants or going postal on HR. Good management

Imagine being such a fucking hopeless porn addict that you just sit there and watch it while you're eating. Get help.

This, I just watch buzzfeed trash but PORN?

how is that different from watching pewdiepie or other e-celeb?

The good news? You're probably not fired. If that were the case, you'd been fired on the spot. Why waste any more time if the intent is to fire you?

If you can't figure that out then good luck buddy..

Porn is more respectable

If you're really asking this question there's something wrong with you

Technically you can make porn by yourself

>not knowing corporate IT people are literal sociopaths who never had the balls to fuck people in real life

>this
your boss knows you poor bastard need a bigger office.
where you can fap without being spied on.
found the brainlet.

>Can you tech dweebs actually see what sites I’ve been on at work?
Depends on the setup your company has. In my case, yes, I can see. In your case they can too most likely.

>You rat on your coworkers?
No, that's a great way to get hated by your coworkers.

>There's no connection between wealth and iq
>If you're such a genius why aren't you rich?!

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>has an open ticket for poor computer performance
>casually browses porn while working
Retard.

You aint gonna be making 80k for much longer, senpai *laughing crying face* *100* *100*

80k is fucking nothing in finance though

kek

>Leaves the door open for a possible emergency situation where browsing porn saves someone's life.

Wow zoomers are fuckin weird lmao

Too bad you are in the US you could have sue them for accessing your data.

Also they can decrypt your https requests so expect them to be specific in their questionning.

This

>brainlet
>cunt
>flatterer
>Sex patient
People like you prove that in order to earn 80k you do not have to be in IQ higher than 80,
you only have to use your parents' money to get diplomas from the academy..
total human cancer kys..

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it’s their machines and their network, and their work. OP wouldn’t have a case at all since his contract probably has a clause in it for this situation.

What kind of weirdo watches porn while he eats????

What are AUPs?

Ah maybe but i'm sure there are some EU countries where it's illegal to access user data at work without a warrant.

Not illegal to record them though.

>have software
You retarded fuck. Do you think each machine has monitoring software installed? They just monitor DNS requests and/or use a proxy server.

That is not the case at all even in the EU, its their network and equipment within their own building even. You're not """protected""" since it isn't your shit.

That kind of IQ in males is often intertwined with mental illness, do that's very much a possiblity.

Companies usually both monitor network traffic AND have explicit monitoring software installed. Basically, OP is fucked.

It's IT's job to rat on you. It isnt personal.

...

I worked at a company that monitored my computer to the point where if I accidentally typed my corporate password into a field on the web they sent me an email saying I had to change my password within a day.

Porn permanently warps your mind so you see it as normal. He's too far gone.

Why didn't you just use your phone?

>No correlation between money and IQ
Based retard.

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I have enjoyed porn for decades, but I'm not watching it while I fucking eat. At work.