>be me
>perma-virgin, never talked to a girl
>girl at uni sends a message
>hi user, what's up?
>whatthefuck.deb
>how do i talk to girls
>autism strikes so i reply
>install gentoo
>what is gentoo user?
>write out an essay on the origins, implications and uses of gentoo
>she says lol ok
>next day
>hey user, Gentoo gahno plus Loonix is really amazing
>she shows me her laptop
>it's got gentoo installed and riced at levels i've never even seen in desktop threads
>heart skips a beat
>what is this feeling
>i felt this only while watching my waifu
>is this love?
>reach for my pocket
>take out the ring box
>spaghetti falls out
>oops.jpeg
>well whatever
>open ring box and ask her to marry me
>inside the box is an onion
>she looks at me uncomfortably
>sorry user, i'm dating chad
>mfw
Be me
relatable
sage
>inside the box is an onion
Next time put a soγ bean inside.
1: tldr
2: girl
3: baby speak
4: anime reaction image
5: waifu, chad, additional meme speak
6: nothing but quotes in an OP
>manage to date a girl for the first time ever
>she's pretty nerdy
>get to see her phone
>it's constantly filled with orbiters talking to her and offering to do things for her
>she gets gifts from them regularly, jewelry, steam games, gift cards, hardware, food, everything
we broke up when I moved away. it changed how I see women forever though. she was below average in looks and nerdy and there were so many guys trying to cling to her.
so what does she want with you? roasties wont approach you withut a reason.
>in today's edition of things that didn't happen
High effort shitpost, good job.
Girl is used to show that OP finds them as a strange creatures different from himself. Like calling me a human.
That's a lie,you'll never talk to girls
>Install Gentoo? I host an instance of Qubes on a Swiss data center, and I VPN in to it on a revolving door of Linux and iOS on my host computer.
fuck off back to r/incels faggot
OP here, she told me she will let me suck her feet if I pay up. It sounds intriguing. Should I accept?
It happened to me too.
I think it was my loli hentai collection
i feel sorry for you user
Is this 2012?
yeah ok
See you over on r/Jow Forums, /v/ros!
based
You tried.
No, dumb footfag.
Kill yourself.
And then you woke up
Give me credit, u/isuckniggercocks
Wouldn't even have been good in 2011.
kys
reddit space go away
uopboated my fellow redditnigger
edit: puns of the narwhalic baconer added
>be me
>perma-virgin, never talked to a girl
The only parts of this greentext that is true.
Put me in the screenshot !
Le to the top we go haha am I right boys?
I chuckled, thanks bro.
The pc forum i browse is literally like that
Some of us boomers have join dates around 1999-2000
>get hit up by lass at uni
>hang out during free time
>ask about software shit
>she's an art hoe and only knows basic shit like e-mail, printing, et cetera
>asks me about the OS on my laptop and I spend about 2 minutes explaining Linux
>result of the following convo is me going to her flat a couple nights later to help her boot into Ubuntu on a live flash drive and show her some stuff
>fast forward to fucking, leaving, and seeing each other the next day at the uni pub
>ask how she got along with Ubuntu
>returns my flash drive
>turns out she really just wanted to shag and doesn't care about IT stuff
>asks if I'd go out with her
>say it's best if we be friends for the time being, especially since our second year is next and shit's hard
>maintain a good friendship and haven't fucked her since
>recently piped a lass in vidya programming and didn't wanna date her either, even though we have similar interests and she was kinda into me a bit
I really feel like I cucked myself twice here but I could honestly give less of a shit
based.
rofl
all that matters is you don't give a fuck at the end of the day
Very bad greentext, try harder next time
this could be you:
>be 50 years old
>no children
>no family
>implying 3DPD reality has anything over my anime
?? why? what you did was great, i had gfs in the past and honestly unless you are REALLY into that person like a really strong connection i wouldn't go for something serious, or at least i will always try to keep some sort of distance by not being compromised, it's really the best way.
...