'sir your laptop appears encrypted, could you enter the password?'

Sure thing, officer
>gives LUKS NUKE password
Oops, you seem to have typed it wrong, try again?
>sausage fingers.webm
Oops, looks like it locked out. Imma have to take it to service as soon as I land. I'll send you the repair bill. HAND.

>No it's not. Try again.

oralcumshot

sure "ab"

>land
>2FA login to private cloud
>DL recovery liveUSB image
>DL encrypted backup of LUKS keyring
>decrypt and reinstall LUKS keyring in place of the nuked one
>use laptop

Attached: .jpg (640x477, 29K)

>I'm Mossad you idiot, you have no power over me, now let me through or I'll wipe out your family and dog

nobody:
Fucking nobody:
Me: bad b8

based

"Nope, and I don't have to, because I'm a US citizen, and wouldn't dream of leaving the US with my laptop."

>Not having multiple partitions with multiple os

Are you twelve?

>implying I'd bring my personal laptop out of the country/out of the state
Lol no. Work provides me my laptop and at most I have a personal tablet. If he wants to see my collection of shit posting meme images and anime titties, so be it.

>encrypting your whole pc
>not just encrypting a hidden partition

Why yes, i am 12 out of 10

>just encrypting a hidden partition on your anime-sticker-encrusted retro-thinkpad
>~Sir, wot's that "unallocated" space on your hard drive? Please come with me to the rendition room where you'll be kept without food, water or bathroom access until you give up your secret pizza stash.
Pleb tier

>encrypting the whole device so the fact of the existence of secret partition can't be proven easily
>using secure key management hardware so the keys can't be extracted from the device
>~This is corporate hardware managed by our IT team. There is potentially sensitive corporate IP on this hard drive so I can't reveal it to you without a clearance check and a signed NDA.
>~Yes, I'm sure our legal and govt. relations department will be happy to educate you on the fine points of intellectual property and corporate secrets law. Please call them at this number right now.
>~I'm glad we could clear up this little misunderstanding, officer. I'm glad they have you securing this border. I feel safer already. HAND.
Is there anything more /cyb/ than wrangling underpaid government boots with corp-speak and a fine suit?

>mfw I'm 2077 Corporate in 2019

Attached: .jpg (1903x1023, 238K)

This, they'll only swipe it to check for residues and maybe open the screen to see that it is a working computer.

They don't in the US either, OP is mixing up TSA with CBP and Homeland Security.

>Is there anything more /cyb/
Role playing on a corporate shilling forum.

I'm sorry I don't recall that

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daily reminder that all of you people are on a watch list
youtube.com/watch?v=8b6yIaKm0Ak

Oh ya sure one second

Canada checks the contents on your phone last I remember.

What the fuck is the matter with you, mall cop. I told you my password 5 times. It’s “R3p1yt0th1$p05tory0urm0th3Rd1e$iNh3r$l€€p”

>encrypted? Is that a virus?
>try a
>that didn't work? try b
>wait what do you mean my laptop just fried itself!!!??
>I'd like to speak to your manager! And tell him I'm Jewish!

>2d lolis and 3d lolis are treated the same there

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Ah no problem at all, sir. You can relax in this room right over here until you remember it. Just follow me.

TSAggots can eat pant

>*teleports behind you*

Heh nothin personal kid

>can fuck dogs but cant look at fictional children getting fucked by fictional dogs

i don't think that will trick most TSA agents, but nice try

>2019
>not using ram sticks as storage

99% of border agents would be confused if a laptop didn't boot into windows, let alone examining your partition table to hunt for hidden volumes.

Can confirm, they've never asked me to do more than turn it on and they stop caring after the boot logo.
Not that you couldn't shove a Pi inside a laptop and then fill the rest up with coke, but I guess they've got the scanner for that.

>tfw you try and sneak your doujins into the US and the TSA agent is overweight with a ponytail

Attached: basedmazda.png (918x464, 272K)

Based kekd and came

lmao

I juss needs ta check insida ya asshole suh

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. not my laptop.

>"good taste, mr. user"

ORALCUMSHOT

why not just render the device inoperable and then repair it when you land?

Storage is memory; secondary memory. Educate yourself.

Because they will think it's full of coke.

Not having normie install with no password.
Download everything when you get to your destination, or work on a vps.

>the password is niggers, all uppercase

TSA's job is to prevent safety hazards from flying. They have the choice to notify law enforcement if they find drugs, but usually they don't unless it's a lot, or you have a wannabe Captain America searching your shit.
Customs exists to prevent illegal things and people from entering the country. If your laptop doesn't turn on, that's suspect. Smugglers commonly try to smuggle things in the shells of laptops, and have even taken to leaving the internals somewhat intact so it looks believable on the x-ray. Plus, why would you be flying around the world with a broken-ass laptop?

>be NSA
>compromise your cloud storage
>inject RAT into image
>steal all ur rare pepe's

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g4wd-im-sick-of&%N0NB10M3TR1X%&xx

My computer doesn't have a password, it logs into the guest account by default.

No, they want me to pay $400 in bitcoins to decrypt it.

"It doesn't have a password, a script runs when it connects to my LAN that authenticates for me. Gee, that's tough luck."

>has hidden partition
>"sure no problem officer, here you go"

I installed CentOS alongside of Windows 7, and it didn't even install the GRUB loader or anything, unless I go into the BIOS boot menu, it doesn't show up at all when you boot the PC.

Yes, I could

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No they don’t. Source: crossed US-CA border two months ago

Canadafag here. They do, just not very often (like 1% of the time if that).

You fucktard realize that NVME SSDs are storage called memory?
Non-volatile memory.. literally in the fucking name of the spec.

I've never been to America. Do they really do this?

You basically lost that laptop. They're going to confiscate it, encase the HDD and maybe mail it back to you in a few months. If not, it's lost forever.

Attached: 1562531985270.png (496x403, 9K)

My password is qwerty123
It not eorking? Look like comethin brocken now

Why not just leave your fucking loli anime faggot shit and everything else you want to hide at home and just show them the content you autists?

memory is an umbrella term for just about anything that stores data, including RAM.

Sure thing buddy.
>y0un33dt0fuckth3h0rs3pu55y4n0n
>desktop pops up with giant floppy horsecock right in your face wallpaper
GOT EEM

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Sir, you are TSA, not CBP. This is a domestic flight, and you do not have a right to search my hard drive because the FAA does not have any rules regarding what *data* can be carried onto an airplane. Now unless your scanner is finding something banned within the chassis, you can go ahead and give me back my laptop, and stop holding up the line.

Based and kekpillldd, adding this to my 30 character alphanumerosymbolic password i randomly generated using sticky notes on a dartboard and usb keyfile and biometric identifier device (connected to my pc by usb and secured using open source firmware and no transmission of biometric info from itself to pc)

Has anyone even tried to blow up a plane with a bomb in a laptop?

what's the best way to actually implement this?

youtube.com/watch?v=rERApU26PcA

youtube.com/watch?v=rERApU26PcA

youtube.com/watch?v=rERApU26PcA

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>Should I cite my first amendment officer?

Sir, im gonna have to ask you to step aside over that line, you are not allowed to answer that rude to any officer and if you keep talking we will consider you as a high threat, now im going to ask you to remain calm and let officer Perry and Lt. Chong arrest you, keep your hands down because he's not that tall and Perry is a happy trigger thug...Gotta fill the quota right?

Only use TTY
Problem solved

They do in Great Britain m8

Cant you just disconnect your HDD and use a clean one? It will boot in a freshly formated Windows

cool, free food. I'm gonna Assange your taxpayer's money, fuckwits.

Sir, I'm going to need the sauce for these images

>use two HDDS
>one disconnected
>one with a dummy install of windows with some normie shit as distraction
gg

Sir this is America, and I have the right to speak however I damn well please. Furthermore, the TSA are not police. You do not have the ability to make arrests, only the ability to deny me access to my plane. Now considering that you are acting outside of what you are legally permitted to do, I'm going to have to speak with your supervisor right this instant.

Excuse me, dear sir, but your safe dangerously close to violating the NAP *dips *enters into the warrior trance and prepares to unsheath

>implying TSA's professional gropers would know what a partition is

No can do
Sorry, company's policy
I can call up the company's layer rn if you want to male this a big deal, buddy

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vancourier.com/all-sexual-acts-with-animals-now-illegal-in-canada-with-new-bestiality-law-1.23862878

>just lick the boot autist!

We've got a turd in the punch bowl, I repeat, we've got a turd in the punch bowl!!!

if you're crossing the border into the united states, yes, they can. And they can detain you indefinitely if you won't. The solution is to not have anything naughty on a laptop you're trying to cross a border with.

uh, are you saying you're attempting to carry technical data outside of the country? that's an ITAR/export violation you little shit, you're in the clink

>3d lolis
No such thing

the term literally comes from 3d retard

>do you have a warrant? I want to call my jew lawyer.
Done.

then there were those guys at defcon that put bombs inside of an hdd and still have it fully functional.

yeh, but who the fuck uses those?

No but it has been done with an iPhone.