/brit/

way funnier than it has any right to be

youtube.com/watch?v=-s2rREf2Kj8

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single linker twat didn't fucking see that you'd all moved to this thread

bet you would you bender twat

tis weak to willy, Arisen

blind cunt

what the hell's your problem? you got bricks in your butt, you clown?

#stopshampooing
#stoppooshaming

perusing a novel

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it's fucking freezing up north today

'

27 degrees here
not sure how i'm supposed to work in those conditions

are you just referring to the /brit/ reply handbook and throwing random responses at me

got a cold lads

He's just a yank trying his best

Is it easy for a man with jungle fever then, not many blacks in Norfolk so I don’t know?

What books you lot reading then?

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got a rite bulging vein in my nutsack

*snips it with thinning scissors*

>brit handbook
waaaaa
just stop being concerned about my butt you raging nonce!
not complicated
simple as

thought italy was hot

36
just found i had a physiical copy of think and grow rich

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hungry hungry caterpillar

wish i was an australian furry
although i type this with the awareness at least one poor sap has found a huge spider in his fursuit head.

>doesnt want to be nonced
>cries like a baby
what am i supposed to think

it is but they're such gentle flowers that if it's not 30 degrees everyone is sick, all the time

anything but my butt sweaty

don't care about the welfare of darkies

theres a tiny spider on my bathroom wall lads
had the poo of a lifetime and it was a complete ghost aswell

people like this are MI5 plants

continuing to enjoy this classic of high literature

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found out i had this secret folder on my phone that has a password so im using it as my wank bank now

spiders are good lads at heart but i like to stay away from them

s

h

y

e

Interesting when you search for an old classmate on linkedin and they don't appear

nigger

Infinite Jest, good read

had peanut butter & jam crumpets after tea today and the gf called me a yank
honestly couldnt be prouder

listening to wiccan songs (ironically) at toil

accidentally stumbled upon a girl's twitter whose profile picture looked underage but when i looked up her facebook she was adult. disappointing

was it good? never tried it before

it is fuggin long tho and the mans obsession with footnotes

reeee, good book nonetheless

A Flow-of-Funds Perspective on the Financial Crisis Volume I: Money, Credit and Sectoral Balance Sheets

haha just kidding FBI

apostrophe bait
nice dubs though

Yeah I need to use three bookmarks

more like PBI - as in POO Bureau of Investigation

was smashing iah

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Javert
good lad desu

pathetic

Right this is the bloody PBI, come out with your zipper up haha

doing a poo

baby im right here

*spreads bum cheeks*
>"YARR NEVER TAKE ME ARIVE COPPER!"
*shoots talcum powder out bum*
*parp*

lads im opening my bowels how mental is that haha

yes, haha love it
*unzips trousers*
*reaches into pants*
ooooooooh yeaaaaah.....

are you doing it to let something out or let something in?

bought 4 pint stella tinnies on the way home from work

out obviously. arse is for shitting not for storage lmao

i haven't had a poo for 5 days and im terrified of what im gonna go through, stopped eating 2 days ago to prevent the build up

*opens my bowels to the general public*

redpilling the masses one post at a time

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why dont you just shit

Have you not heard of fuckin LAXATIVES mate

how come cartoon kangaroos are like the most cuddly things on earth but real life kangaroos look like a cross between steroidal bodybuilders and rottweilers

i have to wait until i have a big poo otherwise the poo doesn't come out because the inside of my arse blocks it's path and tries to shit itself out (though it doesn't have the strength to do so.)

daring social commentary on brexit

sense by King Gizzard and whatever is COMFy as fug lids hahaha

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>redpilling

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if you go to the zoos where they have the really domesticated ones you would probably think they were cuties

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yay mummy has been to costco and now we have lots of things!! hurrah!!

>my older bro came home from Army for few months
>brings back a shitton of MREs (over 200)
>start college that year, bring all the MREs with me
>too lazy too cook, too cheap to buy meal card for school cafeteria
>start eating MREs
>shit's tasty!
>no one told me these things constipate the fuck out of you
>eat MREs for days… 2+ MREs every day
>haven't shit for 5 days
>day 6 starts, can't comfortably sit down in class, stomach cramps, constant urge to shit
>I'm not even listening to lectures at this point, just holding my stomach
>stomach is growling loudly, people are looking at me
>go to public bathroom
>I was sitting on the toilet for 3+ hrs
>after 3 hrs, not an ounce of shit has come out
>I'm worried like crazy at this point that I'm sweating and I'm red in face from all the pushing
>4 hrs in, nothing
>people are coming and going from the bathroom and it's all a blur at this point
>in an act of desperation, I try pushing my finger into my ass trying to dislodge the turd
>I felt, it was hard as a rock
>wiggle my finger for few seconds, still nothing
>so now I have shit all over my finger and under my fingernail and no shit in the bowl
>get off the toilet, wash my hands and proceed to the campus pharmacy (which was like a block away)
>I'm sweating at this point, feel nauseous and like I'm gonna faint
>still sweating like a motherfucker… we're talking September and it's not hot outside and yet I'm covered in sweat
>people at pharamcy are looking at me as I'm running around and looking for enema bag
>find the enema bag, give the girl at the counter $20 and just run out without collecting the change
>go back to the same bathroom, fill the bag with water and get on toilet
>after 4-5 squeezes of that bag, I pull the hose out and the shit just starts flowing
>I left the toilet full of shit and shit was so hard that I couldn’t even flush it down
>ran out with the biggest smile on my face since the day I lost virginity

never ate another MRE in my life

thevegancalculator.com/animal-slaughter/

this is fucked 2bh

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cant poo

cant take laxies on my meds lad

Heading into toil now. Cheeky half day

You can eat prunes and other dried fruit with most meds though.

Why?

>my meds
ah yes of course it's a spacker who's constipated

Enema la

>costco

howling you poor cunt

did u eat the chocolates? thats where they are supposedly haha

the grey ones are cuddly looking, the red ones are cute in a way but they definitely aren't cuddly looking.
unless your dad was jacked i guess

how you coping in this intense heat lads?