Plays Crusader Kings 2

>plays Crusader Kings 2
>heard it's hyper realistic and accurate to the times of the crusade
>within two hours, I burn my wife for practicing witchcraft, secretly kill my 2 year old nephew for his land, sleep with my sister and impregnate my aunt
you Euros and your culture were REALLY fucked up

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I've heard of one royal killing another via explosive manure booby trap, shit's fucked yo

>play Crusader Kings 2 as the Emir of Socotra
>conquer the entire Muslim world and convert it to Nestorianism
>Socotra is the international center of wealth and learning
>the richest province in the entire map
>has maximum building slots because they get added if your province is rich enough
>all of my emperors have had over 40 learning because I always join the Hermetic Society
>the castles in Socotra are littered with secret laboratories hidden in the walls

Also you can let Satan fuck your wife and she will give birth to an Antichrist that will lead your armies!

doesn't CK2 only go back to about 800 or 700 AD? I thought Nestorianism died out before then

the nephew I killed had his personal wagon pushed off a cliff.
I then killed the driver and took the 100 gold I gave him to do the deed.

Nestorianism is a bit of a vague classification. In the context of CK2 it just refers to the Church of the East or just Syriac Christianity.

>playing CK2
>I get an heir
>strong, genius, attractive
>he's got at least 15 points in everything
>suddenly dies at the age of 25
>my second oldest son becomes heir
>he's pretty good but not nearly as good as his dead brother
>my character gets depressed because his living son will never be as good as his dead son
>commits suicide
>play as the second oldest son
>conquer all of Iberia, declare the Empire of Hispania, invade North Africa
>even though he conquered vast amounts of territory and brought peace to Iberia, he will never have his father's love

cadaver synod was more fuckin weird than anything in the game

>he will never have his father's love
relatable

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I never played map painters o_O are EU and vicky this messed up too

ck2 is not mappainting, its cuckold and gay pedo simulator for sick fucks

>playing a Zoroastrian
>become immortal
>exclusively marry/concubine my kids and the kids I have with them

In Vicky you can genocide nationalities out of existance and is the essential Leopold II simulator. Eu4 is just a map painting simulator.

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>cadaver synod
lmao this is mad interesting

>he didn't download HIP mod

get your life in order, bucko

Is this game good? I'm thinking of picking it up.

Talex

>heard it's hyper realistic and accurate to the times of the crusade
Where?

>In Vicky you can genocide nationalities out of existance

Only with mods like the HPM. If you have a reactionary or fascist government the option appears but generates you like 20 infamy.

Yeah but it's like $200 with all the dlc

Why would you ever buy a single-player game?

easier to just pirate it. Paradox are the biggest fucking jews when it comes to squeezing the shekels out of their game.

>ever paying for Paradox DLC
If you really really have to, buy the base game on sale or something, but there's no excuse to pay them hundreds of dollars to play the game.

buy the base game on steam
pirate the expansions

PDX DLC are the only thing that even some buyfags justify to be pirated.

>but generates you like 20 infamy.
Unrealistic, ahistorical, 0/10 mod

Because not everybody is a thief?

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I will never buy any DLC from Paradox. In fact I was pirating all their games because of the DLC policies, but then I realized there is a way to install them on the official game. Now I have bought all of their main games, but no DLCs.

/v/ out

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Yeah...

I should try get into ck2 again. Seems more complex than eu4.

Dont worry, you will eventually grow up one day yourself.

>implying piracy is theft

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>grow up
>realize piracy literally offers the best product for the best money
>keep pirating

>within two hours, I burn my wife for practicing witchcraft, secretly kill my 2 year old nephew for his land, sleep with my sister and impregnate my aunt
Isn't US just like that now?