/brit/

having diarrhea lads
kind of fun with you guys here xx

+1

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Goodnight lads. Hope all the best for you all.

smart man

Wish people would stop making early threads. It serves zero purpose other than giving one virgin freak a smug sense of satisfaction because people are posting in "his" thread.

Her and me could have all sorts of naughty bedtime fun.

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FONT

She will take you to an orgy and will expect to see you ravaged by BBC.

sick of the meme where people pretend it's disgusting to wear shoes inside the house when they have no problem wearing shoes inside any other type of building
in countries where they actually care about it they take their shoes off in shops and other buildings too

took this going 100 km/h down the highway

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no you don't
fuck off scrot

OH BONDAGE UP YOURS

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industrial cock inhaler desu-usergeneratedcontent.xyz/gif/image/1456/42/1456425247844.gif

favourite streamer is on holiday so my life is on hold for the next week

the traditional way of eating apple pie is with cheddar cheese on the side

having it warm or cooked on top is gross though

bit dangerous

we do dis dont need no backin

don't know what "streaming" entails
does it mean watching (and paying) someone to pretend to be your friend

fan theory:

the dutchman is beto. what if beto saved up enough money to get a plane ticket to the netherlands and now he's an illegal immigrant larping as a refugee for the free shit?

i like to live on the wild side

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>the traditional way of eating apple pie is with cheddar cheese on the side

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No, wise up.

why does the working class love to drape clothes over sofas

wot hardware are you runningk tho?

is there a coffee mug DLC where you can move the coffee around

what about the truck stop gloryhole mod

why you got two GPS's?

I hate it so much. I struggle to drink 3 pints without throwing up and I seem to be allergic to vodka. Although on the bright side, I seemed to just throw uo before I got drunk enough to do anything stupid.

lol thats close to where i live

True, but in big office buildings and hotels they typically regulate the floor traffic statistically and have massive, highly organised cleaning procedures, not to mention areas on the way into the more nicely furnished places with easier to clean floors. Defence in depth, as compared to your average household where the carpet is about two steps from the doormat, and isn't built for or going to get the industrial-scale care that public buildings' carpets will get.

god this diarrhea is running down my ballsack
need a daring lad to clean me up after this

No such thing as working class.

doing stupid shit is the fun part though

Need to sniff her panties.

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take some honey with ginger la

>I struggle to drink 3 pints

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you might actually be intolerant to alcohol

Would you rather have no hands or no feet?

It's helpful to have a physical roadblock, because there isn't really a mental roadblock to tell you when you're losing control and good judgement, and the effects are delayed to boot so they sneak up on you.

lmao what are you on all fours

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cant wank with my feet now can i?

no feet obviously
can fix that relatively easily with prosthetics

though one i think hands

genuinely can't fathom how some of you don't drink

literally go to the pub most nights, at uni or at home

god you are a vile muthafucka

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why are the celebrity guests on question time so insufferable

I can get tipsy and become a lot more confident but I never pass out or become unable to censor or stop myself from doing something that would have huge consequences.

ah yes the barfly or pubrunt
we're all jealous

drinking is haram brother

>diarrhea is running down my ballsack
How is that even possible? Are you doing a handstand?

no hands so i will be free from the internet, people will cook for me and i can still kick people

Would you rather have massive knees or massive elbows?

a massive cock in my pants

its called impulse control you druggie runt

leaning forward to browse /brit/ on my laptop, which is on the floor while shitting

elbows 100%

Would you rather have a gf or post on brit at 1.41am?

just lend me your pants then haha

martite sandwich: can't conceive of anything more vile
marmite on toast: aaahhh yes

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People that feel the need to justify their sobriety are pussys.

the lads giving advice really have no fucking idea
if it was that easy i'd have done it by now. what the fuck do you do when you can't talk to lads without going red, sweaty and start stuttering? let alone talking to girls. i can count the number of conversations i've had with girls on one hand, and i'm using the term 'conversation' extremely loosely.
it's never really bothered me until now, like i've always been a very isolated person, but i think i'm feeling lonely for the first time.
i have no social media, no facebook, no snapchat, no public twitter, certainly no tinder. i practically don't exist, that's one of my biggest problems i think. i like it that way though, i don't want to be on social media. i think social media is for narcissists.
i'm 20 by the way. if i'm being completely honest, i'm not that ugly. i'm like a 6/10, i have a decent haircut, i have no acne, no facial deformities, i've even had girls compliment me before, only for me to immediately go red and awkwardly mumble "thank you". i don't know what the fuck is wrong with me. then there's the fucking scars all over my arms, that's another problem for another time, but i'm terrified of actually getting round to losing my virginity and having the girl get freaked out over my arms.
heres some advice that's actually helpful. if you're underageb&, make sure you stick with your mates and when they start going to nightclubs - go with them. from what i've observed, everyone with even passable looks gets a gf as soon as they start going to clubs. it's too late for me now, it'd just be awkward and my mates don't even invite me anymore anyway.
somebody please kill me

Pretty good ice breaker desu, mind if I steal it?

>Addressed to the lad that said he had sharp elbows an hour ago
alri Alex Mercer haha

the feet will be easier for prosthetics to advance enough to replace
they don't have to be as immediate in response time from brain signals as the hands, and if you have things going on below certain joints, your brain's control of your legs could manage the primary function of your feet - keeping you on them
the hands by contrast don't have one inherent function

fooo this is a tough one. i'll have to think about it and get back to you.

thanks,

barack obama

okay here

shannae

>literally go to the pub most nights

but why though? don't you have hobbies or go to places that you can enjoy sober? what do you even do at a pub every night, just sit there and drink and watch other people?

i have like one beer or glass of wine a week usually on weekends with dinner, havent been out o a bar in over 6 years

what's martite?

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shadilae
mae glasgae grae eggenn

the senators that stabbed caesar

it's with friends, but I'm sure I'd rather be sat at my computer for the entire duration of 4pm until 2am
having 3 pints then heading home because you're in at 9 the next day isn't exactly drinking oneself to death, although I do a fair bit of binging at the weekend

Go for it m8.
Where is he now?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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been studying all day
going to wake up early and study some more
going to go into class early and review with my professor before the exam
going to ace this test and the next two tests + the final lads
going to maintain a 4.0 GPA until i complete undergrad and then i'm going to apply to an ivy league school and get accepted
going cement myself into the white upper class and marry a wholesome girl and have lots of babies and then send them to private schools

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one's a dashcam but the screen is a gps and the other is a real useful gps

first ape michael cotton nigger obongo

youtube.com/watch?v=3YLwTJMyoB8

would like to have no hands so i could regularly make hands free jokes
being footless just doesn't have the same opportunities

*strum strum*
virgin freak
*strum strum*
qu'est-ce que c'est

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firing up the 'skylines

what semester are you in?
too late for Spring
too early for Summer

Would you rather have no neck or no knees?

pic rel
nah

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coffee isn't doing shit anymore, might have to drink it BLACK

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Back from my first outing lads. Off on another after lunch.

DON'T REPLY TO THE LITTLE FREAK

people can take summer courses you underachieving virgin freak