/brit/

don't care didn't want a good quality of life anyway

My Son asked me what stream the England game was on. I smacked him and dragged him to the pub.

might just get a cat instead of a gf

You can’t fuck a cat. I mean you can but I wouldn’t recommend it.

let me tell you about my date last night

we went to watch Blade Runner 2049
it turned out to be a bad choice for a first date movie, cause although it was really good it was also an emotional gutpunch and i was a big soppy mess by the end of it
after taking like 10min to recover from the film, we got some fast food from one of the many middle-eastern vans - I think this one was called "Husseins Van" or something.
we took the food to my room and i showed him all my gadgets and gizmos, and we talked for a little while and listened to music and stuff
but he wasn't really making the first move, so i figured i should just force it and see what happened. so i straddled him and flatout asked - "do you like me?" and waited for a response while giving him the old "fuck me" eyes
he went all red and stammered adorably about how "like" could mean lots of different things and i just sat on him and waiting for him to finish while trying to look as lewd as possible

after he finished i put my finger on the spot just underneath where his jaw met his ear and said "I want to kiss you right... here"

then he got the memo and pulled me closer to him and started taking control a bit, which was super hot, and we made out for like 45minutes before progressing to grinding, handjobs and oral

after round 1 we cuddled and took turns asking each other questions, until when i got up to get a drink he slapped my butt and i got all horny again, so i dived back onto the bed and we went for Round 2

in the end he was nice enough to not complain too much when i got cum in his hair, and we set a date for next Tuesday to meet up again

thanks for reading

get a pet eel and the pastry chef gfs will be lining up for you

First two years of uni, tried my best to fit in. Had mediocre success, was known by everyone by was always on acquaintance terms with everyone and nothing more. Decided that was a waste of time, abandoned my social life and immersed myself in studies. Was an antisocial "freak" up till my Ph.D years. Pretty much still am a freak desu, but now I'm engaged.

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Brexit killed little England.
Want nothing but the country to starve so I can say I was right and you were wrong.

Got called mummy's special boy in Greggs