/brit/

joe rogan looks like a turbomanlet on stage, reckon he's not even 5'8

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any tips for Round 3 of fantasy football lads? Ronaldo and Costa look like a given, night stack up on cheap Egypt defenders too

technically not a virgin in fact had sex with multiple women but still consider myself a virgin freak

virgin freak

His comedy is so shit

ugly weak-wristed runtoids froth over plain-Jane train girls meanwhile I'm dating models and booting nerds in their pathetic stomachs

this post made me feel very stressed out

What happened to Jeffrey?

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foy

*is the goal keeper*
*can only save the most pissweak shots and can never actually any difficult ones and loses the game for your team multiple times*
ah yes, love remembering peewee soccer
certainly not scarred my self esteem at all

Do you think anyone will ever love me, /brit/? I'm a huge pervert from a poor family.

not wrong

Really need someone to buy my stuff on gumtree so i can afford a prozzie this week

*steals one of your shoes during PE*

so cute

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cannot stop buying and eating croissants lads

ahaha mate just stand up for yourself

Most of white girls look the same to me. Is she cute?

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You missed stabbing holes in your drink with a compass

I remember once at secondary I saw some shoes in an unlocked locker so I took them out and hid them in a locker on the other side of the building
Not sure why

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quite literally will die If I don't get a gf

*walks up to you*

99 flake please mate, rainbow sprinkles

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You want monkeys blood on that?

heard there wuz niggas talkin shit

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he's 5.8

my home is in a rich girl's gusset

*empties you bag in the showers*
*wastes all your lynx chocolate deodorant*
*tells everyone your gerrard shirt is a knockoff*

>To the tune of 'Tick Tock' by Ke$ha

BOYS WANNA TOUCH MY JUNK (JUNK)
FILL MY BOTTY WITH SPUNK (SPUNK)
HIT EM IF THEY GETTIN TO DRUNK (DRUNK)

you want raspberry sauce on that, boss?

go back with whichever subreddit you got this off please

Used to get people’s bags and turn them inside-out in school

Did it so much to one lad he started crying

northerner

southerner

i think there was a college football player called smooth philtrum

*tells you if you shove a lynx bottle up your arse i'll have sex with you*

idiot

*sprays deodorant on your nipple*
*turns your backpack inside out with everything inside it*

vintage

Ahaha always a good stitch up

was bullied up until I jewed my way into hanging out with the attractive girls

Nationalising the railways is a mental idea even with how shit they are currently

How comes /gif/ is just full of interracial threads with black men?

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Lads is it a good idea to tell your GP that you're self medicating with ketamine/benzos, etc?

got it off the /brit/ general, now go to a real country

POOEY

Lamo how are you tom

>backpack
FOY

*takes shoes off*
*walks around class*

wahey look at me

*drops my pen so i can look up girls skirts for 3 seconds*

I'm a turbo manlet aswell but I look taller since I'm thiner. Key is how slim you look, until you stand next to normal sized people obviously.

3/4 of tinder are fat and/or asian

*plays line rider instead of making a powerpoint presentation*

...

>redditors increase on the site
>so does fag posting, cuckposting, and obsessed posting
makes you think

yeah it's annoying, even threads that have nothing to do with it

*sticks glob of glue on pencil and throws it at the ceiling*

'

fuck the asians then

Met my wife on interpals

*takes shoes off*
*put them on my kneecaps and start waddling around*
look lads I'm turtle

The look of pure confusion and dismay as they pick their bag up and can’t find the straps and then slowly start to realise what’s happened haha

Loved it

*is real popular and cool in highschool*
*turns into an alcoholic neet freak afterwards*

why? even many conservatives are in favour of it

Same but for Asians

every asian i've matched with has inevitably said she has a price if i want a tug
fuck sake

This but at the back of people heads

squawking

*downloads entire facebook albums to wank to*

*calls the teacher mum*

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ABOLISH THE RAILWAYS

NATIONALISE CARS

Disgusting boy

right nonce

Toilstein ordered pizza for us serfs, was very pleased about the footy yesterday and wanted to treat us.

You do realise you get a notification when someone downloads an image from your Facebook

matched with an Asian and she immediately invited me to her apartment
I went and shagged her

gf hates it when I laugh at people in public, says I should be more subtle

Fuck off harry

did that when i was making that tim time-lapse webm
really ought to have done it on his other album, its got like 1000 images or summat

she thinks you're autistic

FONT

yeah mate get my pictures downloaded all the time haha don't you

*goes into the bike shed*
*wipes snot on most of the handles*
*lets down the tires of any bike that’s better than mine*
*nicks the golden skull dusties*

often paranoid that people do this about me though I don't know what they'd be laughing about

idk why I'm so insecure sometimes

When we did DT afterwards it was cooking and i used to put the wood filings into the oven and other peoples food

really haha

*goes to a different secondary school to all of my classmates and has no friends*

matched with a nonce on tinder
traveled back in time and saw how he liked it