How close have you been to dying?

I almost drowned in a flooded ditch as a kid after the ground gave in walking next to it.
Remember sounding like a distressed piglet crying for help.
Glad i was with an older friend that managed to pick me up with a help of a tree branch

Close. Blood infection due to medical malpractice. I was 10.

Took oxy and xanax extremely drunk with zero tolerance. Spent the night telling myself to breathe.

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City was bombed by Serbs when I was a baby, but not very heavily. Health-wise, never had much issues. But while the city was being bombed, I had a 40+ C degree fever (105 F) and the doctor had to run through the city to give me the meds.

Tried to kill myself in a psych hospital - slashed my wrists. Passed out and the next thing I knew I was in hospital. Was told a nurse found me after they did their rounds and I was collapsed in the bathroom.

Went protesting on the streets a few hours ago. Got chased by government backed goons with machetes and steel rods while police watched. Saw people get cornered, beaten and taken away by police so I guess it's the closest I've been so far.

do girls unironically like this? I feel like it’s the crazy ones that only like it

How big is your penis?
Serious question

I've been in 24 airplanes, so 24 times.

I've fallen from tree trunk on another tree trunk that stick out from cliff in the "shit river" and hurt the neck when i was a kid.

oh also had a montreal police officer beat the shit out of me with a club while I was a dumbass student protesting at McGill for government subsidized tuition that I didn't even qualify for because I'm not canadian or quebecois. was a fun riot though.

Girls like being mistreated if you're hot as fuck

my mom's water broke while she was sleeping and she didn't realize until the next day which means I stayed in the womb with no amniotic fluid for almost 24 hours.
when I was two and sleeping on the third floor my sister was babysitting me and she accidentally set the house on fire, I got rescued through a window by a neighbor with a ladder. the house burnt to the ground.
when I was 18 I got blackout drunk and went off in to the woods. I came to naked, hypothermic and covered in scars, being led in to the hospital by the police. This was in the winter and if some person didn't call the cops on me I would have frozen to death.
another time I punched through a window to show off and I cut my hand so deep that the blood squirted out several centimeters to the beat of my heart.

I always wondered if you're a girl or a dude

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I almost collapsed of dehydration and heat exhaustion while walking home 12 miles on a hot day.

Friend lost control of car going 135 mph on the highway. Only lived caused there was no other cars on the road due to it being the Super Bowl. Ended up doing a 540 and hitting the guard rail at about 80. Car near flipped and was on 2 wheels on one point.

Brunettes are hot as fuck. Blondes are wife/kitchen material. Brunettes a rough/crazy sex and pure love material.

Is bangladesh on the verge of a revolution?

Lad

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Wicked case of the flu when I was 15. I was almost totally incapacitated.

Disappointing

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I almost drowned twice. The first time, I was like 12 and got in a water slide with a bunch of tourists, once we got into the pool I couldn't swim back to the surface and the dumbasses that were with me almost crushed me, then they just left me alone. My mom rescued me when I was starting to lose consciousness.

The second occasion my father wanted me to lose my fear of water and took me to the sea to swim so he helped me to get far away from the shore, and then he just left me alone. I panicked and I almost got caught by a current, I was caught by my father and older brother. Since then I refused to go to the sea until several years later.

Also I just about couldn't use my legs for two days afterward, that how much pain they were in.

My girlfriend loves it

I was on holiday in the mountains when we got drunk. Went to take a piss over the cliff when I starting falling foward. I managed to grab a tree branch and kind of 180'd around with my dick swinging. Friends saw it happen and were scared shitless, but we laughed it off afterwards

Just can't happen. Any little hint of anything even remotely political that's not related to the ruling party and you're going to be kidnapped and dissolved in a tub of acid(happened to a minister btw). Ongoing protests sadly won't do shit. I really don't see a way out of this bullshit unless something major goes down and that's even more unlikely.

Fell asleep on the highway while driving to montréal. Woke up as i was about to go in the ditch at about 130km/h. Turned the wheel suddenly and tokyo drifted across the whole highway right in front of a huge truck. I actually managed to regain control and just kept driving.
Kek. Was that in 2012?

>back home by car with friends from a party
>the driver has drunk a lot and smoked marijuana
>he falls asleep while driving
>we went straight to a curve with a truck coming from the front
>when we are going to collide with the truck, his girlfriend who is the copilot gives a swerve and straightens
>I sat in the middle, without a belt

death was certain, that woman saved our lives

got dragged out by waves in greece, I guess that's the closest

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>break away from Pakistan in the 70s because you're poor and don't share in their 60s economic prosperity
>still dirt-ass poor and nothing has changed almost 50 years later

I was thrown out of a moving car into highway traffic by my dad when I was 13 and dodged 2 cars. He also threw me out of a second story window when I was 6 but I landed in a bush.

I also got a gun put to my head by DEA agents who busted my mom for selling drugs while I was home alone sick at the age of 11. I was hiding behind the door with a knife because I didnt know who came in I just heard the door break in and saw a guy in black with a gun out of the corner of my eye

>almost got whacked by a car when i was a kid

biopic when?

Nearly got hit by a car a couple of times. That's about it.

My life was boring after high school. I just went hermit mode and grinded university classes for 6 years until I got my masters degree now I have a cushy middle class job and a handful of friends

All my shit was frontloaded. I even got raped twice by my step-uncle and female cousin when I was 8 and 12 respectively. It just seems like a different life so I'm not THAT fucked up from the abuse or anything. I just went through a long phase of having no self esteem and am only now getting over it at 25. It's all in the past.

Death is a spook to give the black/Satanic metaphysical forces lease in an eternal kingdom of righteousness.

You only have to kill yourself and you'll have fully booked theaters

>540
mph? that's pretty fast. awesome

can you be dissolved for making this subversive post?

>a bag of sour milk got dropped off the 5th or 6th floor and missed me by 1/2m (not sure if that woul've actually off'ed me though)

also a lot of times when I worked as an electrician
>hanging at a wall with one hand and taking pictures of the some motor's ID with the other. Jumped back up when a steelbeam was about to knock me off into the 4m deep pit with rusty junk in it
>almost got severed in half while changing a reflector in a giant grinder even tho the frogeater operating it told me he turned it off
>metal piece fell off 20m crane while riding (work-)bike underneath it. Impact was a meter infront of me

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bruh your luck will run out

w-w-what do you do now? you are not a pilot, are you?

I choked while drinking water once real spooky shit

>on banana boat in spain, 12 years old
>sea is rough
>fall off boat
>lifejacket falls off
>manage to swim to the surface but tide keeps hitting me into rocks
>break my leg
>dad runs onto rocks and drags me out of the water
>spend 2 weeks in spanish hospital
>dad arrested for attacking banana boat men for not securing lifejacket
>charges dropped

at least they aren't being genocided anymore

holy shit, same here
I stabbed myself in the neck though

I drank a bottle of whiskey and lay down in the snow in a forest to die about a decade ago but my parents found me.

Footprints apparently, was a bit annoyed.

back in high-school with 21, last grade starts tomorrow. I hope to become a teacher after college to prevent other idiots from choosing the same retarded 2cool4school route as I did. I flip burgers part-time to not end up on the street.
not today, not tomorrow [spoiler]I hope[/spoiler]

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Been a chronic alcoholic for about 5 years now and one time I drank like 20 beers and .75L of vodka. Woke up two days later and my heart hurt alot.

Viel Glück, Brudi.

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pussy lmao

:(

so what was your route? you went to berufsschule after like 8th grade? and now you are enrolled in gymnasium? you can only go to college if you finish gymnasium, right? or it is a meme

>shooting Junior Division USPSA (target shooting sport)
>father recording my course run
>(literal) Jew shooting range owner skimped out on protective side burm height
>someone, somewhere, shoots a steel target with copper jacketed round
>piece flies over and slams into my neck
Very American experience, almost hit my jugular 1776/10 would do again

my respiration stopped temporarily after i fell down some stairs. was pretty intense while it lasted

Took an unintentional(was supposed to just jump on this jump we created) back flip on my bike when I was like 8 and landed head first. It was the first time I had ever worn a helmet. The helm shattered on impact into hundred of pieces, I'm sure I would have died if I didn't listen to my parents that day.

I OD'd on Xanax and heroin. I passed out and woke up on the floor. My vision was really blurry for a few days and I still have wrist drop in my right hand because I passed out with that arm under me.

Well, few times.

>Swim in bay, get pulled in the water from a fucking strong current to the open sea
>Almost driven over in India from car
>Skateboarding, make stunt, falling on my head, memory loss of entire persona which only came back years later completely
>getting stabbed three times in my chest while walking down in UK in night and getting robbed

Yea, that's that.

Once I nearly had an overdose of ketamine while partying in Ibiza, It wasn't a good idea, I was under the effects of MDMA. Well, everything started with cocaine, then at a rave I took MDMA and Ketamine, I could barely breath, It wasn't so pleasant.

no, I finished 11th grade in gymnasium (sophomore) but your degree grades get counted together including 11th grade, 12th grade and Abitur-test and I sat at a nice D+ so I either had to repeat or make sure to get atleast B+ overall in 12th. But instead of repeating I just went to Berufsschule without thinking about the consequences. I haded it 2 weeks in but my parents threatened to kick me out if I wanted to go back. After 2 years I stopped carring and slept at my best friend's place.
danke, digga

>>getting stabbed three times in my chest while walking down in UK in night and getting robbed
Storytime?

>getting stabbed three times in my chest while walking down in UK in night and getting robbed

How did your insurance work?

Viel Erfolg Brudi. Aber man muss wahnsinnig sein, heutzutage noch Lehrer zu werden :DDD

this proves my conspiracy theory which states that ibiza is in truth an island where a bunch of countries are subliminally directing the worst of their youth to die in order for their societies to improve. This strategy has worked quite well for the uk, and it seems like you´ve barely made it through the test.
You´re a lucky one, appreciate it

Car accident : literally 500 cm from death
Complicated surgery: close enough

>Was that in 2012? No I missed those as I entered in 2013 but those were going on hardcore when my family and I toured campus. This was just during one of the smaller ones around 2014/2015.

WHO?

When I was a very small child, my asshole cousin who was about a year older than me pushed me into a river from the top of a bridge. Lost consciousness when I hit the water, but luckily the current brought me close to shore and I was able to be pulled out. This was over 20 years ago. My cousin is still an asshole to this day.

I almost died during surgery once when I was 6, I didn't come off anaesthetics properly and couldn't breathe or some shit

came close to this happening a few days ago funnily enough, I thought I was constipated and didn't do a thing until I started shaking uncontrollably repeatedly, I gave my sister who's a doctor a ring and she ran me down to emergency where I was rushed into theatre. posting from my hospital bed now actually

I once got ran over by a car and knocked out in the middle of a 4 way crossroads
That was pretty close

Came within 2 days of death due to liver failure/hepatitis B. Pissed neon orange, thought it was odd but didn't panic, called parents (who were out of the country at the time) and told them about it and they said I should go to the hospital. Was super hesitant because I don't like going unless I feel I NEED to and they were like yeah bud you were probably about to die.

>replace my car tyres
>driving down the freeway going 110 kph
>brand new tyre explodes out of nowhere
>car goes into a spin
>smash into the adjacent train line
>wake up in hospital

I got extremely lucky there, it was 1 AM and there was no one on the road near me. If there was I don't see how I could have gotten out of that alive.

I'm no major journalist like the one they nabbed a few hours ago for being interviewed by Aljazeera and I doubt that they'd check Jow Forums but I wouldn't put it past the cunts. On a more fun note, going out to protest his abduction in front of his gallery today. Fun times ahead lads.

I had a 6 hour train ride with an out of service toilet, at the end I was dying for a poom

Why do women like being choked and their hair pulled so much?
Girls live for that shit

Deep down men want to dominate and deep down women want to submit. It's just nature.

I was driving in the morning and one of the tires popped and I ended up swerving into the other lane. My luck that there was no one around, there's traffic there, and I ended up parking in a school.

Another time, while I probably wasn't in any real danger but it felt like it, was when I got a panic attack while smoking and I felt I couldn't breathe. Horrible feeling.

I walked by a couple of Arabs two days ago.

why are women so attractive? why am I so attracted to women?

My flight to Bilbao earlier in the year aborted the landing at the last second because of a major crosswind during a storm

The plane was all over the place and I’m pretty sure we were inches away from a crash landing

because you wish you were one of them.

Everyday I'm one pull of the trigger away from death. I hope it comes soon.

everybody likes it mayne
shutting down the air intake and then suddenly opening it as you're about to come makes for intense orgasms

Well my breathing has had stoppex who knows how many times and my heart has had stopped twice. About as close to dying without actually doing it, I'd say.
More recently I passed out getting out of a hot bad I had fallen asleep in, and hit my head pretty hard on the tiled floor. I think the jolt I got from smacking my forehead brought me back.

more like wish I was inside one of them lmao!!!

Heres a picture i took in iraq. Suicide bomber almost killed all of us

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something oddly satisfying about this image

very close, everyday when i step down the streets my chance of dying immediately goes up by a flat 15%

I'm sure there's been times where I nearly died but never realized

Have overseen a car while leaving my parking spot. It was so fucking close. a half second later and I would be dead.