Oh look theres a 6 month hole in his resume

when they ask you about holes in your resume you shouldn't say you stayed at home and played video games

yeah, actually they do. had a perfect interview until the last second when i was about to walk out the door, "oh by the way user, why is there a gap since your last job?"

their body language totally said they were going to hire me until then.
WRONG. corporations hate independent people because that means they'll more likely leave for the next gig. they want the most boring cucks imaginable that never want to leave.

You had a baby...

>blockchain fund manager

Just pretend you went backpacking around south east asia or something, make up some anecdotes, then shove in something about how it helped you grow as a person into a resourceful, problem-solving, person.

This. I neeted 1 year. Best time of my life. Regained humanity.

I fucking hate HR department whores mate.
They give me the drooling stare when i elaborate on my routine . I hate thirsty and needy high minded fucking whores.
Thats why im probably unemployed as of yet....

Full-time blockchain marketeer, aka shitposting and shilling coins on Jow Forums.

>its another wagecuck thread

only two more days before temporary freedom, wagie. you've earned it, however you'll have to work extra hard so you're not called back into the office over the weekend

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>shitcoin portfolio manager

>independence

Thats a bad thing for company mr. user

I won't hire a sexpat

Literally have travelled for 3 of the last 5 years. Got a job in a casino first time I came back purely bc I had travelled.
Have never had a problem putting my one and two year m.i.a. on my resume

T. Unqualified late 20 guy

>oh look theres a 6 month hole in his resume
>Just tell them you worked in (insert charity in Africa)

tell me more about this 1 year neet

sounds appealing

Just change the dates on your resume. No one is going to fucking care or check. If they do, you probably don’t want to work there.

Two more days I can do it.
Then I get a three day weekend.
Then I get one day to work from home
Then it’s two full weeks of work but after that I get another vacation day and a three day weekend.
Then it’s another two full weeks of work and it’s Independence Day holiday.

I can make it. I will not kill myself today

>working
>not included in the resume

You add that to the resume you fucking brainlet

Well l, OP? Why didn't you work? Don't tell me you actually though crypto would've made you rich?

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Oh look there's a 5 year hole in my resume. Oh look it's the 5 years where I started my own fucking company, hired people and then sold the company to a competitor for a few millions. Oh look I'm not even required to work here, I'm just here for the lulz. Oh look you're looking for a consultant, so let me consult you: 20k a month and I'll work from home or you'll have to hire someone else.

use prostitutes mate college prostitutes are cheap and will heal ur body and soul just pay them.

>He doesn't know you can put your own company and freelance on resumes
>He consults others

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Just title the section 'relevant experience' and you may as well pass the first screening by HR drones. Resume only needs to be good enough to go past HR and get you to talk with actual people you will be working with.

I care about getting a decent job right now , preferably with languages i know - deutsch , english.
I've worked as tech sup for ebay last time - was 3 years ago as it pertains to this particular field.
How fucked am i ?
>youtube.com/watch?v=9lXZWxLxbq0

>Unironically wanting to kill himself
Just kys

>competitive online marketing

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>6 month hole in his resume
Literally nothing. A 6month gap could be justified in so many ways. As long as you're not a fucking retard and say you were sitting on your arse all that time no employer will care.

Kill yourself becauuse you are a worthless slob.

Just tell them you were taking care of your terminally ill dad. Works every time.

I'm 29 and have never had a job. I'm in uni afar dropping out. What do I say when I apply for a job?

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I tell people I'm a venture capitalist. Sounds impressive and it's somewhat true.

Is this how wagecucks live?

So terrified that your superiors wont let you wagecuck again, if you have the nerve to stop wagecucking for even a few months?

Absolutely fucking pathetic.

>Not incorporating LLC
>IT Consulting Services

Just say you worked for an ico or something kek

29 and dropping out of uni....wow mate, i would say you really need to re-evaluate yourself but at 29...wtf. Im 31 btw.

>I'm 29 and have never had a job. I'm in uni afar dropping out. What do I say when I apply for a job?

Just never apply for a job. Problem solved.

The bonus is as a non-wagecuck you can become alot wealthier.

>he tries to sell himself using generic buzzwords to get a well paid job
>he doesn't use the interview as the platform to force the employer to sell themselves to you, subconsciously indicating to them that they want to hire you

Stay working in mcdonalds

That isn't helpful, retard.
And do what?

Can anyone in the know tell me if I can simply lie?

Can you really climb the corporate ladder by being loyal and sticking to one company?

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That's a a lot to gloss over. Maybe fake a job, get a friend to pretend they're a manager and take the call if they follow up on the reference.
>He tries using meme pickup tricks in a job interview
>Wonders why he's still unemployed

Yeah. Sure.

of fuckin course you can! unless you are going to need a background check for security.

My dad used to work @ a S&P 50 company, you have heard of this company. a guy got promoted to director, he had put that he graduated from Harvard on is CV when he started @ the company. No one knew until he got the promotion to director & it was not b/c a background check was done. It is b/c his story about Harvard did not match up with other directors that attended Harvard, ppl got suspicious, the company found out he lied... he got fired.

>oi vey, this wagie is financially secure enough to not be begging for whatever abuse we throw at him in threats of keeping his wage slave job
>he's no use to us
You can always tell the boomer fucks that haven't been in the job market since 1973.

An employee that isn't living paycheck to paycheck is a bad goyim. If you want to almost guarantee being hired, drop that you just bought a house. Employees that are trapped by Mr. Shekelstein's Wild Ride will suck dick for the honor of working extra hours with no compensation.

try 18 year

Not in the global economy. Read the Sovereign Individual for more details. Invest in yourself and the rest will follow. Company loyalty is now more of a meme than ever.

My situation: I'm a NEET but I've been trying to make it as a Jow Forumsnessman on and off for a few years. I have some money in the bank as a result of my mostly failed ventures, and because those ventures were mostly failed and because they were frankly lazily executed (until recently), I don't really have a proper work history. I'm not autistic and I can lie about it and make it sound somewhat convincing, but that's the extent of it. If I'm completely, unflatteringly honest, my work gap is something like 8 years, and before that I only held shit service jobs anyway.

So you're suggesting I can simply lie convincingly and that'll do?

I don't care about lying about school (don't have to do that in my preferred field) but I would have to lie about work history. I've really been stressing out over this.

Do background checks actually show work history in some form, or are those only for criminal records?

bump

I just got turned down over having a longer commute than another guy.

lol

What should I do if I have multiple interviews scheduled and one of them offers me a job but I want one of the other jobs more but I'm not guaranteed to get it?

Ask for a day or two to think about it, but play up the enthusiasm.

I know nothing about this but I assume you can attempt to leverage your other offer only once you get an offer from the other company

Lol, how the fuck can we help you? Dude, you’re 29, never had a job, and dropping out of a university? That’s insane. You’re basically a Compton welfare momma queen. At this point, join the military. That’s literally the only thing you can do.

>t. normie

50 years ago, yes. Nowadays, hell no. I'm 34 years old, started working when i was 20. First job lasted 2 years, the next less then 1 year and the decade after that was one shitty temp job after another. I genuinly worked my ass off and nothing paid back. I'm pretty much done with it all now... can't buy a house, can't start a family, etc. I seriously want to see europe burn, it expects everything from me, but delivers absolutely nothing. It destroyed my future, my family, my race... everything. My body is ready for what is to come.

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>actually wanting a wage slave job at places that make decisions based on your resume

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>graduated 2 years ago with a Bachelors in Mech Eng
>no failed classes, 74 weighted average
>still havent found a job

1 post by this ID

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Clearly OP is sliding the very valuable pink and red wojak threads

Good, I wouldn't want to work for yuppie WASPs in the first place

living in a constant state of fear and stress that your owner will fire you or won't even give you the job.

The absolute state of wagecucks.
Who gives a fuck? LMAO I would rather live in the woods than be a fucking slave cuck scared to go for 1y vacation because some roastie from HR won't like it. FUCK THEM and go find a real job if you really have to.

All those useless fucking jobs where modern day slaves sit in their cubicles typing some total BS glued to their little screens.
Serious jobs don't require you to sit with some fucking roastie answering her retarded question like
>hmm user, what kind of animal would you be if you weren't human?

Fuck wagecucks, and fuck all the corporation, call centers, consulting, and all the other dick sucking jobs. Only men with no dignity work there

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if they can get what you reported to the tax man maybe they can derive employer from your income. If they find low or no income it might suggest you havent been working

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>when your job is so bad autistic NEETs mock you

iktfb

One year here. I regret my major so much. Literally one of the hardest things you can study in school and yet there are no jobs for it.

this. I took 9 months off to travel and got a job pretty easy when I got back. I'm in sales though so I was able to spin it pretty easily. if you're a low level wage cuck you're probably screwed.

>dropping out of uni at 29
>never had a job

Pretty much your only option is to get an unskilled job. If you've never had a job, you won't come across as convincingly confident if you lie. And employers don't want social retards in an actual company, which they'll assume/be able to tell you are.

Go to like 10 restaurants and apply to be a kitchen bitch (basically washing up and bins).

I have an interview tomorrow afternoon for an entry level data admin job. I lied and said I had the 3 years software experience they're looking for and vastly exaggerated skills in Excel/SQL etc in my application. How fucked am I? I'm praying they don't ask me to do anything and I can just learn it rapidly as I go along.
I made the mistake of taking philosophy/literature, which while being genuinely interesting and giving me a chance to talk to girls (8:2 gender ratio on my course) left me unprepared for a job in anything except PR which I got an internship in. I want to get into data analytics by self teaching, applied for this job while high and LARPing on a cover letter and suddenly they offer me interview and take the job off the site.

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Did you just say "I have 3 years experience" or did you specify jobs you did? They're definitely going to ask you about your experiences in the field.

that's normal for engineers. I have a friend who did civil and he just got a job after 4-5 years

wow, I actually did this pretty much, except sold for a few hundred grand. But literally everything else is spot on

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I said I had data experience when I worked for EE for 3 years which is 90% a lie, I did brainlet tier data entry and reformatting stuff when I wasn't making coffee (I was 15-18). I think I can lie convincingly I'm just scared they'll ask complex questions about functions or worse still ask me to show them something in practice during interview. If they offer the job I'll learn everything off youtube quickly, I just don't have time today

It's probably worth spending a few hours on Youtube and practicing. Considering you'd basically have skipped ahead 3 years and how few jobs there are going. I highly doubt they'll ask you for a demonstration though. It's fucking data admin. It's more important you get on with them.

By your experience I would say you shouldn't have lied because you probably were qualified enough anyway. They'll probably ask you why someone so experienced is applying for an entry level position lol. Just tell them it's because you like their company. And if you get nervous and fuck up and the lie comes out, just say you exaggerated because it's really important to you.

mate just blag it, subtly ask in the interview what is expected of you in the job etc, say you need a months notice to your old employer, then study what you need to do in that month. once you're in the company its fucking hard to fire you and you can always ask colleagues for help. if its entry level a nigger could do it so why cant you?

whats the worst they gonna do? fire you? oh well LOL

I should probably brush up on Excel at least. I went on the website and they have the 'small family business, customers first' vibe and mostly 5* reviews so I was going to bullshit about how much I value that. I have no idea what the job entails but I can't even remember how to import data properly or use basic functions.

I said I could start June 7th so I definitely have enough time. It's just a case of getting through this interview tomorrow. I'd like to think I'm a pretty good bullshitter, I mean I worked in banking PR which is 90% pretending to like assholes and writing lies

it's entry level but using SQL, excel functions and shit like that is arguably beyond wog tier. My 4 weeks of hell at Lidl was nigger tier.

m8 dont forget to chat to em about blockchains an shit too, they'll think you're clued up lol

You literally explained how you suck at adapting.

If you know so well what a company wants, why do you not fake it.

>he just got a job after 4-5 years
Only the dead can know peace from this hell.

I haven't worked for 8 months but claimed I was doing freelance work.

I have went straight into a 500 Euro per day job on a ship.

I unironically got the financial PR job last year through that. was a boomer-run place with buzzwords stenciled on the walls

kek gg bro

ITT: people who don't know what working is and think a diploma gives them the privilege to just deserve a good job.

Meanwhile I worked in a factory for 3 years and got offered 4 different high responsibility jobs without asking. Eventually accepted a desk job in supply chain and make more money than all my friends and peers of the same age.

Just start your own shit. I've got a mate that makes a killing from minimalist movie posters.

Easy money.

What was your company? Or did you mean you just lied about having a company?

I think if you understood the amount of work that goes into an engineering degree then you might feel at least a little bit entitled to some kind of employment too.

how could you not know this question would be asked though? make something up. "had money saved and took off some time to learn/work on projects on my own". anything. it doesn't matter if you weren't being paid, what matters is that you show them you filled that time with something productive. otherwise they're going to assume any downtime you have while on the job you'll just slack off and fuck around.

note to any other resume gappers. do that. toss $15 at some Udemy courses. fuck around with some kind of side project or learning in your field. anything that you could talk about when asked why you have a gap. it doesn't need to become your full time focus while you're unemployed, but you need to say you were doing SOMETHING productive.

it was a car export business (mostly export), from the US to russia.

Apparently it did not work out too good for the guys that bought it, as the russians set up very high import tariffs on autos, about 2 yrs after I sold