No but really where the hell do I start?

Since you guys still don’t have a Jow Forums style sticky for the general obvious questions, I’ll ask it here.

I want to get into crypto or bitcoin or whatever, but every google search is just ads and stuff assuming you understand it. And aside from a bunch of memes about fatfaced frenchies, all I understand is money’s getting made and I want in.

So help me help you get back to pink and green wojaks, and tell me what to read and how to get on board with this mess. If nothing else I’ll never have to make another thread like this again and that would be nice for both of us.

tl;dr
Pls explain how to mine, trade or generally make money with crypto.

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Other urls found in this thread:

bitcoin.org/bitcoin.pdf
youtube.com/channel/UCJWCJCWOxBYSi5DhCieLOLQ
youtube.com/watch?v=DelF6zEHXpE&t=1s
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

Or at least link me to the people that will, you know. Fuck’s sake tell me what to google at least.

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Okay, I'll try to get you started but I'm no pro Jow Forumsraeli or for the matter of fact I don't hold a lot of crypto myself, but I do understand the technical side.
There are a few courses on Bitcoin/Crypto/Blockchain on Coursera, edX and whatnot. Those could provide you a good entry point to learn about crypto.
But maybe to best begin is to read the original Satoshi whitepaper, since you mention the Jow Forums sticky I expect you to have atleast some technical knowledge, but even if you don't there is alot you can learn and insight to be gained from reading it. What I did is printed it out and read it that way, I highly recommend it because of the eventual convenience it is to have a paper copy laying around.
Eventually you'll also wanna read the Ethereum whitepaper, since ethereum with it's smart contracts and blockchain virtual machine is a whole different pill.
To make things click even more is to watch some youtube videos to fill in the gaps, and, often underated, is the wikipedia pages, read through them, click the references(!!!) and you'll be well underway to become an informed investor.

Now for swing trading and technical analysis I have not a clue, I watched a few youtube videos, but I'm mainly just holding my current small investment. Hopefully another user reading this can help you out with this.

>satoshi whitepaper
I just googled that name. You mean this paper right?
bitcoin.org/bitcoin.pdf

dont bother crpto is dead.....its a scam

check out this channel user

youtube.com/channel/UCJWCJCWOxBYSi5DhCieLOLQ

just wikipedia

yes, satoshi is the creator(s) of bitcoin

Just buy Chainlink user....its that easy.

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look out for signals like this...its fud intended to drop the price lower so they can buy in at the cheapest prices....dont listen to them user bull run is imminent. Now is a great time to buy, and it never hurts to price average in over time ( probably we have another month or so of leveling out before we start to see any real price action. For now, fudsters gonna fud. Oh, and dont buy anything Jow Forums tells you to buy.

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Look, it’s probably funny for you, but I literally still don’t know what a FUD is just that Bogs keep using a Korea one to ruin wojak’s life. This is all going over my head.

If you genuinely need Jow Forums's help then you will never make it because you're just not smart enough. The only way to make it in this market is to know how to do your own research and filter out all the bullshit, which comprises 99% of Jow Forums.

Just go to vegas or buy yourself something you'll get use out of with that money instead.

Fear Uncertainty and Doubt.
Get used to it around here... Good coins will get FUD'd and bad coins will get shilled. Pay attention

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Don't buy in right now. It's still a bear market and probably will be for at least the rest of the year

FUD means Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt. Whenever you see certain terminology being used you're not familiar with, do a quick google search.
I could give you some definitions of terms you will also come across:
FOMO:
>Fear Of Missing Out
Bear:
>Prise goes down
Bull:
>Prise goes up

Also, this
youtube.com/watch?v=DelF6zEHXpE&t=1s

This. It appears you are not self sufficient.
You couldn't even google FUD

Get a binance account if youre considering buying into any alt coins and for god sakes use my referral code

binance com/? ref=12087616

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Don't be a fag shilling your referral codes

too late

Okay, thanks. Yeah I just gotta get back into googling stuff.
Look sometimes I’m a dumbass and miss the obvious solutions trying to remember things, sorry bud.

I’m gonna process all this for now and work it. Thanks everybody.

reported code to binance for terroristic threats

funds still safe

whatever you do
do not buy link

Whatever biz tells you to buy. You shirt that, and hou short that hard.

To start, wire fiat mo ey to coinbase. Move fiat to gdax and buy bitcoin with maker trade. (Read about maker and taker fees on gdax). Now you bought bitcoin without fees. Create account on binance and transfer bitcoin there. Now you can buy any and all shitcoins on binanace. If you want to short stuff, open account on bitfinex and transfer money there. If you want to margin trade, go to either bitfinex or bitmex. If I were you, Id do bitfinex. They only have 3.3x margin compared to 100x on bitmex, but trading with large margins is gamble.

There are other popular exchanges for other shitcoins like idex, but start with binance.

DO NOT BUY LINK OR 0xBitcoin or coinbane or or shit unless you know wtf youre doing.

Never buy shit on news

Never fomo and buy green dildos. Allways buy when red.

Dont hodl in bear markets. Buy theter and wait. Again unless you know something we other dont.

Again dont listen to biz on what to buy. They either shill because they are hodling bags or fud because they want price lower to buy.

Dont buy based on technical analasys. Find out what to buy on market perceptio and the. Use technicsl analasys to figure out when to buy that shitcoin.