Thoughts?

Nah, false cognate. The silent "s" in "island" wasn't originally there but got added to make it look more "French-y". German equivalent is "Eiland" (archaic use only though)

Portugal controls the peninsula with a iron but fair fist

i thought that was Iberia?

portubros is this filthy Spaniard spinning lies?

Spaniards tend to mention this a lot when we talk about our countries, as if to say "yeah, you have a sovereign state and all but you're basically still Spanish", but it's really just an exercise in semantics. The Spanish live in Spain, we live in Portugal. End of conversation.

No. Portugal is a cute slut. Don't make more complicated than necessary.

they are OUR cute slut

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those are all true though

yes, and portugal is part of the spanish peninsula