Wrong things you thought were right as a child

Wrong things you thought were right as a child

1) I thought that male has to be than female to marry her, otherwise marriage is forbidden
2) I thought that America is the biggest country in the world because I thought that USA and Canada are a single country.
3) I thought that Spain is coolest country in the world
4) I thought that there is a country called Latinia where they speak Latin language

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Older than female*

that America is white

I thought Denmark was the worst place on earth because a girl from there used to bully me, I still think it is.
I hope you discount scandis get drowned by climate change.

I used to not think about race which was nice

When i was 7 my family went with another family to a restaurant, and after eating me and my friend both went outside to play, as we usually did.

At one point we grab two stones, see a car and start doing graffitis all over it.
My parents came out, saw a Mercedes Slk200 full of stone graffitis on it, freaked out and ran away hoping they would not have got found out. They are still kind of ashamed today of what they did back then.

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>3) I thought that Spain is coolest country in the world
You were not wrong kiddo

incredibly based opinion either way

I thought I'd rather live in the USA.

Phew, dodged that bullet.

I thought Morocco was the faggotry center of the world because I knew a Moroccan faggot, I still think it is.

i thought women had another piece under their breast to feed babies. it took a long time before i found out they did it with their nipples.

I basically thought doing graffitis over whatever surface was a-okay because i had seen a graffiti art show a couple months ago and thought it was cool and that my parents would've called me an artist.

Did he post on 4channel by any chance?

I forgot one more
5) I thought that women pee from asshole

i thought blacks peed black oil instead of yellow urine until i was 10 years old
rate

I'm not sure but if he did, he'd probably post under the numbers 101827927

i was scared to swallow apple seeds because i thought an apple tree would grow inside me
i thought elbow grease was real grease

kek, kinda unrelated but my friend tought women pissed out of their arse when he was like 17. very sad, but very funny for us. pretty sure he is still a virgin to this day

For real I thought Czech republic and Turkey were the same cause they are spelled similar in danish (tjekkiet = tyrkiet)

I thought babies came out of the woman's butthole because I was watching a birthing doc with my dad and he shut the thing off the moment they put the ladies' legs behind her neck.

Are you asian?

I thought my life had a purpose

>legs behind her neck
How the fuck are women giving birth over there?!

Why did you think the maghrebini babies all come out retarded?

user, i...
Think that wasnt a birth documentary

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white, i'd only ever seen one nigger when i was a kid

Ha ha can you imagine
> I thought Mesopotamia still existes until I was a teen.

You see so many WW2 documentaries here. When I was a kid I thought there were German Nazi troops at the border. But our military kept them at bay.

Wow that hurts

Remembered some more
6) I thought that Nubia still exists and that they sold all their gold to british
7) I thought that Hungary is slavic country and I was really surprised when I found out that they aren't
8) I thought that Greeks don't wear clothes at all

I thought Germany and Nemetsia are separate countries

>everybody thinks in Finnish
>Italy and France are brothers because of their flags and passion for cuisine
>I thought my dad knew James Hetfield because he had lived in USA in the 80s and I liked Metallica
>I thought he had served 40 years in the army. He was 44 years old at the moment but had been a professional soldier at one point

It seems I am retarded.

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>7) I thought that Hungary is slavic country and I was really surprised when I found out that they aren't
they kinda are
finno-urgic language and germanic ethnicity, but the culture is basically balkan, a german feels more out of place there than a russian would

Genes don't mean shit, especially in a pretty diverse region such as balkans and central Europe, culture and language is what defines civilization

yes, i agree, that's why i'm saying hungary is "basically slavic" because of their slavic culture

I thought that men have to suffer in conscript army to make equal it with women suffering while childbirth

It was a French Doc. They made her raise her legs very high though. Idk why.

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Hahah cool
I thought that if I go in army they send people to fight terrorists in Afghanistan and Chechnya and I was afraid to go to army because I thought that army=war == death

Don't laugh at me but I thought that Mexico was founded by indians who escaped from America. Also I thought that the population density was the same all around the world.

Same,
in childhood I was always really confused comparing soviet/western aesthetic military films and news reports from chechnya where everything looked like mud-shit covered junkyard and fighter from both sides dressed as hobos

I used to think Finland was Scandinavian

When I was 6 I was larping as Napoleon. I had a fake passport with my picture and name Napoleon Bonaparte. I always carried it to prove my identity. And I was talking about my superiority. Stupid old nurses in kindergarten hated me because I was not like other kids. I was the only one who knew how to read but I was also the only one who didn't know how to zip up the zipper. They told me in aggressive manner that I have no right to call myself Napoleon

That hitler was wrong

>zip up the zipper.
how could you possibly not know how to work a zipper?

I knew it theoretically, but I could not do it on practice. Not to tell about shoelaces...

Asked nanny in daycare (4-6yo) where nettles grow from, she said "from your piss". Always had to run really deep into the woods to piss to ensure nettles wouldn't grow where someone might some day want to walk/play. Was like 10-12 when I realized the treachery.

I thought tourists and terrorists were the same

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She wasn't wrong though, peeing on them make them grow

Jesus, I thought russians and racists are the same.

The inside of your torso was hollow except for a wall in the middle, and food piles up on one side and drinks fill up on the other side until you go to the washroom.

Remembered two more!
9) When I was 4 I asked my dad "Germans were our enemies?"
My dad answered that there were german enemies and german allies, because not all germans supported Hitler. He said that enemies were fascist.
After that i thought that word "German" is a synonim to word "neutral", and word fascist means enemy

10) I didn't know that Lenin is someone's name, I thought that the word "Lenin" means "monument". So I called all monuments lenins

I thought it was illegal to have kids unless you were married. When I read news about Roger Federer getting married, I got confused because his wife was pregnant.

Same

>USA is the promised land
>Switzerland has no muslims
>China has rich culture and is in front of its time, as it was 1000 years ago
>faggots are harmless to the community
>I was created with purpose of being loved and taken care of
>Russia is a great country and my greatest ally
>my parents love me

I thought Argentina was a state of the USA

The Serbian Boy

"I saw a Serbian boy in the local hamam for the first time in my life yesterday, unfortunately, I could not approach him... He was with a Habeshi (Ethiopian/Sudanese) tellak. Such beauties are very rare in Anatolia. "

"But I thought..."

"I thought how exciting it would be to talk to him, uncovering what made him as beautiful as he is. I thought about how nice it would be to learn about his life, and learn about the world I never saw."

"I pictured talking to him, eyes darting like those of a harem lady, looking anywhere else but in his eyes."

"I pictured myself sultan carrying him with ease, to a dö?ek (bed). I pictured myself, unclothing myself, and rubbing his silky-smooth pale skin with my rough, dark hands, and him, squirming sultana-like."

"I pictured him unclothing himself in a slow manner, drawing it out, so I can have a good look at his body. "

"I imagined him slipping his hands under tuman (underwear), and jostling my manhood, rubbing his almost lady-like, pale fingers on the tip of my manhood."

"I imagined..."

"Unfortunately, my day-dream was interrupted by the tellak who poured the hot water on me, may Allah curse him, for ruining the image of the beaut."

I thought Mexicans were white because of their tv dramas, they were popular here back in the days

>Serbian, Croatian and English are the only languages that exist
>WW2 was fought only between Hitler and Tito
>All people believe in the same religion as us
>New Year is more important than Christmas
>Russia is our fren
>Croatia is our fren
>Turkey is in Northern Europe, right next to Denmark

Also I thought Egypt was a made-up place from fairy tales

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I used to think that Russia was a place with men in business suits who live/work inside igloos filled with sci-fi technological gear inside.

People of US and Canada and European countries are white

correct

I thought air could go through walls because I didn't see any way air could enter the house when the door was closed.

-England is like it's depicted in the Mary Poppins movie
-People in Scandinavia and Russia all live in wooden houses and travel on sleighs
-Money laundering consists of washing banknotes and repainting them with brushes
-Countries in the Americas had chosen what language to speak in the past
-Most of the USA is still like in those Western films with sheriffs, saloons, gun duels and the like
-Everybody in Eastern Europe has military training and keeps fire weapons at home

Johnny this is crazy. I come to Spain to party. La Gente eat mui loco.

might as well be

1. i thought every country in the world was like america
2. i thought that if you had sex your body would just shut down and you would fall asleep immediately after you came

Based Napoleov

>spain the coolest
why would you do that to yourself

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Cringe

As a kid I thought Mary Poppins was set here in Italy

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Did anyone else think that color was invented in the 1960s and the world was black and white before that?

I thought that having sex is just beating girl's butt with your butt, like south americans do in their dances. I had no idea that you can do benis in bagina until 7

I thought vaginas were located in the same place as the penis ie. the front, rather than under

hahaha

Idk why but I thought that everything spanish is cool and I wanted to be spanish. But I didn't know anything about Spain

Same. And I thought that vagina is just a round hole in skin

cute
I don't get why she would say that

1. I thought making love was a female sitting con you while bouncing and caressing each other as my cousin taught me.

2. I thought I could trick God, who is omniscient, if I changed my decisions suddenly without trying to reason.

3. I thought people were universally dumb, just because I was smarter than the "smart" kids of the entire school and teens who were older than me.

I used to read a lot of books and play rpg so I thought that I am the protagonist of the world and that I could not possibly die

That's nice, do you still like Spain nowadays?

the only reference I had of the Scandinavia was Woody Woodpecker so I used to think Swedes dressed traditionally like Wally Walrus and played the säckpipa all the time

>I thought babies were made by men and women just being within proximity of each other
>I thought the British were the heroes of history, rather than its villains
>I thought guns were scary

I don't give a fuck about Spain now

>2. I thought I could trick God, who is omniscient, if I changed my decisions suddenly without trying to reason.
based

>I thought that I am the protagonist of the world and that I could not possibly die
>implying that's not true and the rest of us aren't just NPCs

I knew he knew about my plan, so sometimes I thought about changing my decision twice or thrice, while trying to avoid thinking about it, because he might find out about new plans I could make, so I often did it without thinking and simply acted without thinking in the end.

This but with Sweden and Switzerland, in Portuguese they are Suécia and Suíça respectively

I thought TV stopped broadcasting when I turned it off, meaning that I could resume watching my shows after school.

>Everything foreign was English.
Almost all international pop culture is in English, so everyone speaking it must be from England.

Also, my (female) friend asked me what religion they have in Italy.
I said catholicism.
She said: ”Sure, but like Finland has christians, what does Italy have?”
We were in high school and she had had A’s in religion.

i thought all foreigners were chinese

When Quebec wanted to separate I thought they were going to saw it off and float it away.

I thought everything East of Germany was jewish and that jewish people had a population size comparable to Christianity and Islam

How did you feel when your learned about the holocaust and the protocols?

1.I thought i am living in most beautiful and great country in World

you are!

I thought qt 3.14 meant "cutie free points for teens"... not even joking

I thought that you are supposed to put your penis in girls asses.
I thought my imaginary friend that i spoke with only in the bathroom was a ghost and was legit
I thought that Asia was a country and all asians were from the same country
I thought that when i grow old i would be happy

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I used to think that everypeople in the world spoke the same language except us (the french)
I also thought that gays had sex by throwing their cocks at eachother like a swordfight

I thought that the man had to pee inside of a woman's vagina in order to get her pregnant

If it makes you feel better I thought lesbians had sex by rubbing their butts together