You wake up in Norway

You careful with that.

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Visit the local mosques

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Shoot up a local mosque

why is every white guy balding?

Because we are hot n sexy.

It's in our genes, just take a look at all the famous streamers with Nordic blood. Pewdiepie is purposely hiding his receive hairline.
Just by taking a look at Asmongold's hair you can totally see that his ancestors was Nordic

receding hairline*