I started bringing water bottles in my bag.
When the supervisor is in the other cage section, I just pee in empty bottle, then store it in my bag so no one notices.
By doing this I don't need to call the supervisor to let me out. The supervisor seems to notice my lack of neediness, and tells me I'm doing a good job.
But honestly I get too much anxiety talking to people, so peeing in the bottles allow me to talk to less people.
doesn't know about the lifestraw
never going to make it
I bet he fills up his water bottle with expensive company money. Nevermind they'll just dock his pay at the end of the year.
>2027 still not sucking up piss from your pissjug with a life straw.
>never ever going to make it. Unironically
Who else /dualclaw/ here?
>tfw only six more months of garnishing until it's paid off.
>Wagie, I noticed you bringing a lot of water to work
>y...yes sir
>Wagie, water is a hazard to the machines, we are going to need you to stop bringing water bottles into your cage ASAP
>y... yes sir
>And listen, I think you’re doing a good job but you do realize I’m going to have to knock a few points off of your performance eval for this, right?
>y..yes sir
>Good. Good job, Wagie. Keep up the good work in there.
Wtf is this cage wagie life!?
My wage cage overseer confiscated my pee bottles the other day. So now as soon as he locks me in and leaves I pull a filter tube out of my socks and tape it to my urethra, then any time I need to pee I just put the end of the tube up to my lips and drink the filtered liquid. If my tube gets confiscated too I'm not sure what I'll do.
I love these threads.
The robots were scraping against the side of my cage again today. It seems like whenever the manager is offsite they get nearer and nearer.
This fucking wagecuck cage is just hilarious. I can just imagine Amazon actually having the gall to implement this shit one day and the wagecucks reluctantly get in since they don't want to lose their jobs.
My wage cage supervisor let me leave for 2 hours to see my child give birth. I spent most of the hours in traffic, but I was able to see my newborn daughter for 15 minutes after her birth before I had to go back. Then I left to finish the rest of my 12 hour shift. Her mother died due to complications.
>my child give birth
Haha, I mean my wife. Sorry, still torn up about her dying. But my supervisor promised me another 2 hours unpaid bereavement! I'm so lucky to work for them.
Congrats user. I heard Mr. Jeff is coming up with a brilliant new baby wage cage to help newborns get a head start in the labor industry. I'm sure your daughter will make a fine employee.
Guys, do you think mr. bezos will actually implement this? My work is putting stuff in boxes and I dont work near machinery, do i need to worry?
Thanks fren, it's going to be hard to raise a daughter without my wife's half of our minimum wage income, but Amazon is offering a generous employee loan of 19.99% APR for us cagies in need. I think I'll borrow some now to cover the hospital bills and funeral costs.
>not unironically ironically drinking your piss in your wagecage
>not realizing your piss is unironically the fountain of youth
don't forget the $100 amazon gift card if you don't if you don't take any sick days.
I just steal a box of adult diapers off the warehouse shelves every few weeks, idgaf.
CAGIE WAGIE CANT BE NEET!
get in the fucking cage, wagie
There is literally nothing wrong with a cage, you know when you ride a forklift youre essentially in an enclosed space, same shit
t. good boy wagie
Lifestraw filters germs not piss.
>PICK UP THAT CAN WAGIE
except when youre in a forklift you can get out at will without someone with a keycard letting you out
If you're not doing anything wrong, what's the problem with working in a cage?
I like the job security of this cage
never understood that line. do you expect other people to pick litter for you? It's like you'd get offended for people pointing out that you are uncontrollably shitting on the ground
it's a Half-Life 2 reference you brainlet NPC
Kek gold
SPOOPY
unironically