I'm an ugly beta autist loser 28 year old with no friends, acquaintances or social experiences since school, no female attention ever, and I've never been to a pub, club, or party, even through university.
I did a degree I had no interest in, so I forgot everything in it. I became the ugly loser that nobody talked to within one day of all of my jobs. I'm blackpilled and know that women and Chads have lives on easy mode and sex and good times on tap, while my life will be difficult
I waste all my free time on internet browsing. I binge on junk food and coffee almost every day, which rapes my bank balance. I have no passions. I have read many more books than most people my age but couldn't talk about anything in an informative manner for more than 10 minutes. I see my previous success in education as evidence of my lack of initiative and high docility. I now feel more proud of the times when I did badly due to losing all interest- at least that was evidence of balls.
I'm a meek, charismaless loser. I failed over 50 graduate job interview processes. I have a good job that I will start later this year but I am not posh or extroverted enough to succeed in the workplace. A large percentage of my money will go on rent. Working 9-5 feels like a prison sentence.
I'm 28 and have none of the happy social memories that people my age have. I lived in London for over a year and felt sad the entire time, from summer to summer. My job miraculously required no work and I couldn't use the time at all. I spent two years straight as a NEET or working part time, and I didn't show any initiative to do anything seriously productive in my free time at all.
I envy people that can "produce", i.e., entrepreneurs, STEM academics, good artists. I just mindlessly consume. And at work, I will be a bureaucrat. I am back office material without any connections. There are hundreds of 21 year olds making millions through software.
