Mom found the onahole

>If I didn't let the trash/pee bottles pile up and start emitting an odor

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Nice larp dude. If not, you are a fucking pathetic loser

imagine peeing directly into a toilet in 2019 lol I'm saving money on my water bill

based

>current year
>not peeing in the sink

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Tell her i love you to while jacking off prove to her your a man.

>>mom thought it was a dildo
Then assert dominance AND clear up any confusion by showing her how you use it, while staring directly into her eyes the entire time you use it.

What do you throw at mommy when she doesn't bring you your tendies on time then?

just tell her its for putting your dick in, and if she doesn't believe you then just show her how it works.

Shrimp.

are fleshlights even worth it? i mean they don't even work for edge sessions because they stimulate too much or am i wrong?

>throwing out all the valuable potassium in the sewer instead of your garden
I can tell you won't make it

So im gonna ask..
What the FUCK is an onahole....?

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I live in Thailand. If I want trendies I walk outside to literally any street and buy them. From someone else's mommy.

>dad found my dildo and sisters' panties
>he never brought it up but he treats me worse since

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Exactly. It could turn into a great bonding moment

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well for god's sake set the record straight and tell her its just for jerking off. Save what shreds are left of your dignity by getting out infront of that nonsense.

indeed

Your picture has happened to me more times than I care to admit. Bumping addy really makes you last forever...

fucking sluts

You niggers need to sort your lives out.

You're not cute.

Japanese onaholes have a lot more variety than fleshlights and are usually made of a softer material. I ordered one off amazon and honestly its really nice. Would recommend. Not for every fap but every once in awhile is good.

amazon.com/gp/product/B00G3THBEK/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

These are the real investments Jow Forums should be talking about.

fuck man im far too gone, just looking at the hole of the onahole makes me get a boner, jesus god i should try to become an ascetic again

After jacking to trap porn for years you eventually turn to the sissy hypno stuff... Then you start dressing up and using dildos... Then comes the drugs to make you edge longer. It's a slippery slope.

At least I'm anorexia now. I'm in pretty good shape besides by degenerate secret dress-up sessions.

Just think of how much money you will save having rendered roasties obsolete

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WHAT THE FUCK WAS YOUR MOM DOING DIGGING THROUGH YOUR SHIT, OP?

I FUCKING SWEAR
FUCKING PARENTS
CANT EVEN HAVE A FUCKING FLESHLIGHT HIDDEN IN MY ROOM WITHOUT THEM POKING INTO MY SHIT WHEN IM OUT AT FUCKING WORK SHIT BITCH FUCKING ASS REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Buy a safe dumb ass. Do you just leave your guns and precious metals in a sock drawer? Wtf?

The greatest pleasure of sex is feeling desired, and intimate with another person. The ego is getting it's greatest validation. Mere wet slippery cooming doesn't compare.

Business & Finance, kek

You just need a stronger imagination. I don't want to be desired by some thot who will be a granny in a few decades.

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You brought it on yourself by being a degenerate.

>tfw don't even think about real life girls anymore thanks to onahole
>tfw focus entirely on making money and improving my own personal life instead

>no time for grills
That's that all losers say. Obviously they are trying to hide the fact that they fail in social interaction and don't want to do anything about it. Finding a conservative girl and spending quality time with her is not a waste and doesn't take that long. Better than posting here.

>Conservative
>Girl

>what's a church?

>mom thought it was a dildo

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Yeah but crypto already fills that "desired" need everytime it goes crazy and pumps your bags

>Churches in 2019
>Conservative

Pick one

Nigga if you find spending time with a church girl is a good investment then you seriously must be underage or mentally challenged

Yeah I forgot that wallowing in despair and cooming in your hand is somehow based and redpilled nowadays. Pathetic.

Then that do you propose? That you don't spread your genes and do the retarded MGTOW? Good luck with that genius, see how human psychology will respond to your retarded self-centured degenerate hedonistic lifestyle.

You are the type of guy that cooms inside a woman and then gets depressed and paranoid for an entire day thinking she will get pregnant and thinking you fucked up lmao at your psyche

you have to go back retard

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Sorry I forgot that this board is for losers with pleasures being the only goal in life. GO GET THAT LAMBO DOGGIE!!

yeah like idk, having fun and knowing lots of women, then figuring if the girl is actually genuine seems a better investment than putting all your eggs on the first church girl you meet because you trust the system works in brainwashing the girl to be good, you are basically trusting your alpha wisdom in a fucking old man who touches little kids and gives a weekly sermon about how sex is bad and so on, you don't even know if the girl is there because she fears his parents or she genuinely thinks a family is good lmao

I bet you don't even know if the girl has a good relationship with his dad top kek, but that's up to you, be a good man and marry her up soon

I think she’d rather believe OP is a gay boi than a virgin incel who needs to play with a pocket pussy.

gb2/suckingredditdick faggot

just come out as gay because you have no chance of getting a girl

man that picture is fucking relatable :(

You shouldn’t be pissing in bottles anyway, but if you are doing this at your parents house, it’s even gayer

Eh this. Most of the girls who go to church are deluded free-spirit types who think they're the most creative tortured soul artist types just because they grew up playing guitar in a church youth band and they watch Harry Potter even though their parents said not to.

>Jow Forums - Business & Finance

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You're right it's not based and redpilled. It's based and blackpilled

based
fuck OP and jannies

Did your sister find your loli onahole or something?

just say it was something to help you 'relax' and that it's not a dildo

There's no way I'd have that in Bezos Corp. purchase history. If I bought one it'd be in cash in person from a store.