Totally socially autistic

>totally socially autistic
>Not really gay but get internet e-bf off Jow Forums to practice human interaction
>Eventually move in with him and try sex to practice
>Several years later we are talking about marriage and surrogates
Ok I think I've had enough practice how do I get girls now? I wish this was bait but I've just kind of gone with the flow up till this point and I'm starting to get uncomfortable about this getting permanent.

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If this really isn't bait I'm amazed that a human being like you exists

I wrote it in another thread and it just struck me that I should probably ask for advice in my own thread.

I just went with the flow and now I'm here and quite uncomfortable. I'm not good at disagreeing and saying no.

Well, you can tell him in the kindest way possible and leave him or spend the rest of your life suffering, not much to say here.

I'm just scared of being alone. I haven't been alone in a long time, and I don't know if what I'm feeling is just fear of commitment or an actual feeling.

God, faggots are disgusting

>hihi made someone fall for me so I can practice my faggot relationship
>hhihi casually fucking to practice sex

Wtf is wrong with you freaks? It's like everything about you is designed to be repulsive as some kind of self-protection mechanism

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I'll not gay

We're you the girl in the relationship

Say you were emotionally abused and confused about your feelings and are just realizing this now.
It will be too difficult to understand if you tell the truth (at least initially).
Saying you were sexually abused seems like the most logical route to normie sympathy and understanding but I think gays are more likely to take it personally since it is a common theory among anti-gays that it causes homosexuality.

Of course you're the one who knows this person, what he's like and what route might be best.

Ideally, you should just be honest even if it causes upset. The trouble with that in this case is a lot of people are sort of "trained" to reject people saying "no, actually I'm straight" seeing it as denying their sexuality, even taking it personally and seeing it as an invalidation of homosexuality as a whole.

It's a tricky subject because people will want to default to their dogma rather than listen to your story.
They believe they are the righteous and enlightened compared to people in the past (or in other cultures) but they are just the same unimaginative people following a rut carved out for them by others.

>not gay
>get internet e-bf
If you're straight you REALLY fucked up, how the fuck does that even happen?

I wanted to practice, and I was really really lonely.
I mean I wasn't really abused... I wonder if I could turn this into something where we were still friends.

Op has been pasting these exact words for like a week now. Stop falling for it.
Unless Op is the "should I buy his book that's coming out in September" guy, he's cool.

I wrote it out in one thread and got no help so I made a thread to ask... Just once that's it

Can you give more details on your story op? Like how you went from just fucking around to living with the dude and literally fucking around? If this isn't bait, and you're really straight. Just say you don't think this is working. You'll have to probably ease into it. Most likely touch LL have to start distancing yourself and slowly act a little more number to him. He'll expect it at some point and you can then have the conversation that you both know is going to happen

I just wanted a friend or something and it escalated. I guess I'll try pulling away but I'm scared of being alone.

How old are you? Would you really be ok marrying a dude? Having children? Are you the top or bottom? That can make a difference

Mid 20s
Top
I would feel weird doing it
I want kids but I want them to be mine

So things to consider.

>Family option
>Long term mental state
>Weird view of life

So your family would they look or feel any different if you married a dude? Friends or work people?
If you think you're straight, it's going to be in the back of your mind. It won't go away at least not for a very long time. Can you get over that?
So your life. I'm assuming you have an idea of how you thought or wanted things to turn out. Wife, children who are yours by blood, grandkids some day. This is still a possibility. However you're gonna have to make amends with the fact that it'll be with a dude. You might also have to either give up bio kids or know your partner isn't in their make up. Can you do all that or at least process it. I don't wanna make you not go through with it but I do want you to understand what it'll entail should you marry a man. As for a top or bottom, I meant if he was the top it could of gone easier like most dudes with a break up. He might be more emotional as a bottom.

To add being young, you could try it for a year or two and not have kids. See if you're ok with it

Live together for another few years?
I do really want bio kids. I am worried about him being emotional because he kind of is.

I mean actually being married. Some people it can have a completely different mind set it's person by person.
For emotional thats why I said slowly begin to distance your self. It not only prepares him but helps build your resolve. If you can keep it up, it'll help show how much of your heart is into it or isn't. You can have bio kids but itll be different then the traditional route. Can you be ok with that? Will you be comfortable raising children like that? These might seem a little insensitive but it can have a big impact down the line. Describe how bad he is emotionally? Are you older or younger than he is?

I'm older
I feel in my mind I could see that life but it does make me uncomfortable

Can you see you and him being old together? Can you see yourself truly being ok with that life or does the thought kinda leave a very mild bad taste in your mouth? How long have you been together and describe him emotionally if you can please

I'm asking these to kinda have an idea of how I can help you plan for what you want to do. Sorry if it's a little personal

A person that is not gay would never not do this.
I would rather be alone forever than get a "e-bf" and "try sex for practice" with a guy.
You are a faggot, admit it to yourself and your life would imprive significantly.

Not op but loneliness is a hell of a thing user. Some just need the interaction or physical touch.

Personally as a straight male the thought of being with another guy makes me want to puke.
It is disgusting and degenerate.

I personally wouldn't either but some people just truly need another person in their life to make them feel better. Dude could be bi or was bi curious and things just escalated. Either way looks like he's wanting out of it now

Don't worry OP I went through something similar-ish I guess when I first moved out of home. Moved into a sharehouse but it was just me and the older dude who owned the place. Was divorced. Drunkenly admitted that I'd been thinking about sucking a dick and waddya-know he offered his up. Didn't really like it but didn't say anything because I was young and didn't want to rock the boat. Ended up with me getting fucked in the ass every other day until I eventually moved out.

Any last affects? Like you still crave sick or you good for vag?

Sometimes I still want to get fucked in the ass. First few times it didn't hurt but it kind of sucked anyway, but after that I found it could feel great. At this point I'm sure I'm just some level of bi.

I bought a dildo but it doesn't even feel remotely similar to the point where I just don't even use it.

Never once wanted to suck a dick again though. Cum is disgusting.

How's it with a chick compared

How didn't he first conversation go about that? Hey you sucked good let's try anal?

Better with girls because I'm attracted to them and they're soft and cute and shit. Also I get to cum because, you know, I'm into it, so that makes it better.

Nah he was real brazen about it, stuck a hand down my pants while I was standing at the kitchen counter and started massaging an ass cheek. I wasn't sure what to do and kind of froze. I still cringe thinking about it now that I was so malleable I just let it happen.

So you have regrets about it or still keep in touch?

You were raped dude

We're you ok with him doing that