Why do girls show no interest in me?

I do chill, like I said I just talk to girls normally and make friendly conversation. But they just don’t appear romantically interested at all

lower your standards a bit and see how it goes. maybe you’re aiming too high.

I’m not aiming too high at all. I speak with all girls, for one, because I like to get to know people. And I have a broad type, I can honestly say that out of all the women I meet I probably find the majority of them physically attractive to some extent.

No girls show interest in me though, regardless of how conventionally attractive they are

Bro your lack of self honesty is astounding. You’re confident and attractive so there should be no reason you can’t snag a girl. Yet you fucking can’t, so obviously you’re doing something wrong. Everybody here is trying to give you advice and you refute it every time.

Apparently you do nothing wrong and it’s just some weird paranormal barrier preventing you from getting a girl. So seeing as we’ve already established that you’re doing everything right we can close the thread.

No, you’re just like my fucking friend. You’ve got the conversation skills down but your problem is you don’t know how to properly show your interest. You aren’t makkng a fucking friend you are finding a mate.

> I speak to them like normal people

You don’t speak to women you're attracted to like “normal people” because they fucking aren’t. So speak to them like you are attracted to them not like you’re making buddy buddy conversation. And If you are already trying then you fucking suck at it, so practice.

When you engage in conversation with a girl you like, it’s an art to find the balance between keeping normal conversation and flirtatious conversation. Like another user said. You need to focus on your attraction of them and bring that out in your conversations. SHOW them you find them sexy instead of talking to them like a friend until they give you a sign that you never end up seeing.

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They smell your sadness OP. You have negative mojo

Okay that makes sense user. But then why do people give me conflicting advice like ? Which one is it? Do I speak to girls like normal people or do I speak to them deliberately flirtatiously? Because people give both forms of advice.

Also I just don’t know how to flirt. There’s never an easy segue into flirting when I’m talking to girls. It would feel awkward and out of place to just randomly start flirting out of nowhere

Flirting should come naturally when you're into someone. If it doesn't then you're not really into them or you're overthinking it. If you really like them then enjoy being with them in the moment and flirting should happen spontaneously. Stop worryin about whether they're attracted to you.

Well flirting has never ever spontaneously happened for me, and I talk to a lot of girls.

Why does this all feel like it’s totally out of my control?

Can confirm. Got a girl to leave my DnD group because I have semiconsciously flirting with her

>Why does this all feel like it’s totally out of my control?

Because it's easier to blame an invisible force than it is to admit you are messing up.

>why do people give me conflicting advice

Because you don't give out information. We don't know if you are a dipshit trying to talk love to a girl at the bar or a sleazebag asking out every girl in his classes because all he wants is to get his dick wet.

All we know is that you have no relationship with girls:

>Asking them out would just be so out of the blue

That's cause you don't show interest, either.

Okay so what should I do

Let’s say I’m at a party, I see a girl I like, but usually she’s talking to someone else, like another girl, so it’s hard to get in the conversation sometimes

1. How do I start speaking to her
2. How do I start showing interest in her

Why are you alone at a party where you don't know any girls?

What happened to all those girls that you talked to all the time?

I'm asking because you don't sound social savvy enough to introduce yourself to a stranger at a party to hit on her. Sorry man, but I think you are trying to run before you can walk.

No im not alone at parties lol. I get invited to a lot and I always know most of the people. But there will occasionally be people I don’t know obviously. And of course sometimes I have crushes on girls that I know, but haven’t spoken to too much

I’m very sociable at parties and can pretty much talk to anyone. I can talk to girls just fine in a platonic sense. But I really struggle with showing interest, and girls never show interest in me

>No im not alone at parties lol

But you built a scene where you approach a complete stranger that's with a friend of hers. What does that tell you about yourself? About the way you imagine flirting?

Why do you have to hit on a stranger at a public gathering like a party? Why can't you ask someone out, someone you know? Why can't you make a move on a girl that really enjoys your company already, someone you can imagine more with?

Oh, right:

>girls never show interest in me

You don't imagine anything with anyone. Well, that kinda puts a big stop to your plans, doesn't it?

>I really struggle with showing interest

You have to. You have to do it, to break this pattern of apathy. Maybe you'll get rejected, but you gotta try.

Well there are girls I know who I would like to ask out. But there’s just no good opportunity to do so. It would feel out of place and unexpected for me to just ask a girl I know on a date out of the blue

Again I really don’t know how to show interest. Like what exactly should I do

OP here user

>>Okay that makes sense user. But then why do people give me conflicting advice like # ? Which one is it? Do I speak to girls like normal people or do I speak to them deliberately flirtatiously? Because people give both forms of advice.

You speak to girls you aren’t attracted to like normal people. You speak to girls you are attracted to flirtatiously. They aren’t “objects” however they are something you are trying to acquire.

>>Also I just don’t know how to flirt. There’s never an easy segue into flirting when I’m talking to girls. It would feel awkward and out of place to just randomly start flirting out of nowhere

Sounds to me like you just answered your own question user. Hasn’t your mom ever told you practice makes perfect? It’s an art user you need to work at it until flirting with somebody you like feels natural. It all boils down to you needing to bring awareness to the fact that you are attracted to said person. If you talk to them like you would a normal person; how are they suppose to know you like them? Most things are just common sense user.

>>Can confirm. Got a girl to leave my DnD group because I have semiconsciously flirting with her

There’s a time and place user. You were probably flirting at the wrong one. As long as you don’t have autism you should be aware of how girls are responding to you.

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>Like what exactly should I do

I won't tell you that. No one can. We can't feed you a foolproof plan. We can't give you a way to make it work. Social interactions are varied and chaotic. What you need is to work on your outlook.

You say:

>I really struggle with showing interest

But that's because you literally imagined the most complicated and stressful scenario possible. You are asking how to approach a girl that's A) A stranger, so you don't know if she is even single. B) Not alone. C) At a party where your friends will see your success or failure.

Start by imagining a better scenario. Don't waste your energy stressing over the worst one.

>But there’s just no good opportunity to do so.

Do you even hang out with a girl one on one? Do you ever spend a long time texting them so you can set something up?

I don’t ever hang out with girls one on one no. But I hang out with girls all the time in group settings. I just don’t think I’m close enough to any girls to hang out one on one

Same with texting. Girls never text me to be honest

>I just don’t think I’m close enough to any girls to hang out one on one

Maybe you need to work on that, don't you think? Maybe you need to SHOW SOME GODDAMN INTEREST and hang out closer with some girls and not others. You feel like asking them out would be "out of the blue" because it would be. You gotta develop something first.

This faggot makes this same thread every day, receives the same advice and still refuses to follow them. Why are you idiots helping him?

How do I show interest in a way that seems natural and not forced?

I don't know you, your friends, where or how you hang out, etc.

There's no universal way to do this. Find one that works for you. You can't wait until someone else hands you a scrip. That's not how it works.

Weak ass bait

>helping
The advice boils down to "try doing something", so he'll keep making these threads until he gets something concrete.

Elliot Rodger thought highly of himself too.

"Try doing something" is concrete advice.

The problem is that you cant get something morr concrrte out of this. Life works much better when you prepare to try and do, not when you expect to be told what to do and to avoid problems by reading off a forum.

And that's why he will keep making these, he has no idea what to even try. How about you tell something that worked for you?

How about he figures it out by himself? Fucking christ with you autists.

And how exactly do we make him do it himself? Retard

He's not figuring it out in this lifetime.

then that's nature way's of getting this shit out of the gene pool, quit making a drama about it.

I don't particularly care either way. People seem to be upset about these threads existing so I just explained that they probably won't be going away. You might want to learn how to hide threads.

Also, why are romantic relationships different from any other topics covered here? Or does the "figure it out" advice apply to all threads, making the board obsolete?

If you think we shouldn't help each other then get off Jow Forums, moron

>How to end up in a #metoo tweet, by user

>sleazebag asking out every girl in his classes
But that's literally what some of you are telling OP to do.

No, OP, more specific examples won't help you. I will say "I started going out with a girl I met in primary school, we have been online friends for years. It didn't really work, though, and we stopped seeing each other after a couple months." and you will say "But those girls don't talk to me anymore! I can't do that!". That's why advice is general, because we don't know your situation.

>But that's literally what some of you are telling OP to do.

If he is too shy to even ask a girl out, then he needs to go bigger and bolder. If he is asking every girl out and looking desperate, then he needs to dial it back.

That's the point, we don't know him. We can't offer him a script on how to behave because we don't fully understand his situation.

In that case you can tell him how you started going out with that girl. You don't know anyone's entire life experience on this board.

It doesn't work like that, people like OP make excuses. As I said, he will tell me no one texts him so he can't do what I did.

That's why the best advice is "Work it out yourself". Learn to think for yourself and deal with obstacles. We can't feed you a script, you can't avoid making mistakes. Learn to deal with them.

But no girls do text me. That’s just fact.

How do I get girls to text me? I’d feel weird messaging them out of the blue. How do I not feel weird about it?

Please, tell me I'm beint trolled. If you are really OP, if you really read my posts and thought writing this was smart, then you are a lost cause.

The problem is less about the subject and more about the fact that this faggot OP has been making the exact same thread EVERY DAY for who knows how long (I've been visiting Jow Forums every day for 2 weeks and every single day there this thread, I wouldn't doubt he's been at it longer than that). Everything that could be said about the subject has already been so. It's very clear that OP is expecting women to get on their knees and declare their eternal love and is too autistic to actually approach them and strike a conversation. There isn't much anyone on Jow Forums can do anymore and he should seek psychiatric help if his social anxiety is so extreme to the point where, paraphrasing OP, "getting rejected by random women in bars is going to ruin his life".

What? Why can’t you just answer my question?

The reason I seem clueless is because I literally am clueless about relationships.

>The reason I seem clueless is because I literally am clueless about relationships.

No, the problem is that you are lazy and a coward. You expect others to give you a plan that will solve your problems, as if you could imitate me and get tje sane results.

You can't. I'm not you. Learn to think. Learn to do.

Stop trying to plan conversations before they happen. It's not possible. You literally have no option but to get yourself into a situation and formulate your response on the fly. We can't tell you how, social situations are fluid, they change every time someone speaks.

Okay the reality is
>I know lots of girls
>I socialise with girls in group settings
>I can talk to girls just fine in group settings
>BUT
>I never hang out with girls one on one
>Girls never text me
>Girls never flirt with me
>Nor do I do either of these things

I worry that girls just view me as a non-sexual being now, because I've never flirted. So if I start randomly messaging girls and flirting with them they might think "ugh, this is really weird, user never does this, whats going on". How do I not let that happen?

Yes but there appears to be a literal mental barrier that prevents me from escalating into flirty territory with girls

They NEVER flirt with me, whether they want to or not. So I can't rely on that option. I have to do it myself. But I just can't

You anons only see me in my darkest states. You don't see me on the days when Im upbeat, confident, when I get random bursts of motivation and think "im going to go to that party and flirt with a girl tonight". And I go with every intention of doing it. But then the same thing happens that always happens, I get no response from the girl, she goes off and speaks to other people, theres no window of opportunity, everything stays completely platonic, and my long and arduous struggle continues.

>How do I not let that happen?
You don't do these things and be content in dying a virgin. Unless you're a 10/10 rich Chad the odds of women actually approaching you or showing they are interested are slim to none. If you want to be successful with women, you have to take the risk.

Just flirting with them isn't going to make them interested. If you want things to escalate into sex/proper date then you're the one that has to ask them about it.
>inb4 "but how am I supposed to do it if they aren't flirting back at me :c"

>Yes but there appears to be a literal mental barrier that prevents me from escalating into flirty territory with girls
Get therapy.

>I have to do it myself. But I just can't
Well there's nothing for us to do. Maybe therapy will help, or try a shot of booze or a pill of benzos before you go somewhere ladies will be.

>How do I not let that happen?

I can't give you a perfect plan.

Flirt with girls that are interested. Meet new girls and flirt earlier this time. Try to get to know them more without flirting out the gate and see where it goes. Flirt anyway and deal with what happens.

Plenty of possibilities, and I'm sure there are more I didn't think about. All of those have their own risks and issues. We don't know which one is the best for you. All we know is that not a single one can guarantee success.

Stop asking for this holy grail of a perfect plan. No one can give you that.

When we do something right, a pathway is created. Unfortunately, a pathway is also created when we something wrong. We basically build habits this way, both good and bad. So the reason we keep making the same mistakes is that we slip by default back into existing neural pathways.

You keep making the same old mistakes. Every flirt should be a learning curve and you should learn from it. You shouldn't repeat the same flirt with the same failure time and time again. You should try and figure out how to get on the next rung of the ladder. As you get older you realise to get pussy you should be more direct - when your leaving after meeting someone you like and you think there is a connection - just say something like fancy meeting up again sometime - swap numbers. If you don't ask you don't get.

So can I just clarify this? What you're saying I need to do is
>Go up to a girl I know
>Flirt with her
>She won't flirt back or show any interest
>I need to keep showing interest regardless
>Then I need to ask her on a date

Is that it? I just want someone to tell me what the "normal" thing is that happens.

>I just want someone to tell me what the "normal" thing is that happens.

WE CAN'T TELL YOU THAT! THERE'S NO "NORMAL"! THERE'S NO WAY TO PREDICT THE FUTURE!

You need to deal with the uncertainty and deal with the fear.

>Is that it?
Yes.

Okay, right. And I'm ready to do that. I really am. I want to break out of this cycle so, fuck it, I am willing to put myself and my life on the line by flirting with a girl and asking her out.

But there has to be some flow and style to it, surely? I can't go up to a girl and just start blurting compliments. I can't just ask someone out completely unexpectedly after having barely spoken to them. So what is the way to naturally flow a conversation into flirting? And what exactly even is flirting? Because I don't actually know

You have interests and they have interests. Try talking about these and see if any of your interests match. It's THAT simple, dumbass.

>But there has to be some flow and style to it, surely?
>So what is the way to naturally flow a conversation into flirting? And what exactly even is flirting?

You are the most worthless person I've ever met. What makes you think you'll get another answer besides the one I've veen giving this whole time?

Different social groups, with different interests, from different places, with different ages, doing different activities, made up of different people, etc. flirt differently. There's no guide to follow for this.

That's what I do already. Did you miss the post where I said that? I talk to girls about their interests and a lot of the time, we do have shared ones. But that doesn't progress the conversation or the relationship into flirty or sexually charged territory, does it? A girl isn't going to start kissing me because I spoke to her for 20 minutes about her favorite TV show

Listen, all you need to do is that most people (girls included) just like having interactions outside of their friend group, view them as regular people with fears and stuff and try talking about their hobbies and stuff

If you can't guide the conversation to the point where other subjects show up and you learn more about each other, then you don't deserve physical intimacy.

I can do that. I just cant do the bit where the barrier between "friendly conversation" and "flirty conversation" is breached. I have no idea what I need to do or say to make that happen

"hey, talking to you has been fun, wanna give me your number so we can hang out one of these days?"
You don't have to wait for the girl to be "flirty" before you ask her on a proper date.

>SHOW them you find them sexy instead of talking to them like a friend until they give you a sign that you never end up seeing.

When socially awkward guys take this advice and put it to practice, they'll be called "creeps" and Jow Forums will bitch at him and say "uR SUPposED 2 tAlk too ThEm like PEOPLE!/Like a gUY"

Showing interest and asking a girl out out of the blue are two different things. Some guys can't tell the difference.

user, just start treating them like shit, literally.

Girls are literally that stupid, i promise

Please please please user. Im 26, grew up online. Im at the perfect age to tell you "love" wears off at 23. Nothing matters, if you like them, treat them like dogshit and abuse them, its the only way theyll have anything to do with you