GIOYC

Let's Get It On, You Crazies!

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I saved you from myself. The more people call me a POS for what I did the more it confirms I did the right thing. You're welcome. Removing me from your life was the best thing I could of done to protect you.

You mean, I saved you from me. This vagina has been blessed with such tight and hot ferocity you wouldn't be able to stand it and probably die.

I am not a man so clearly not who you are projecting onto my post, but either way you are saved.

bullshit all girls are men and all kids are FBI agents

aight, I get what's going on. I can keep a secret if it spares my sanity. Out with it.

a-are you my dad?

I beat my bf for cheating on me with his best friend but I feel bad now

1: Please stop mirroring me, you realize what kind of torture this all is?

2: Same tho.
Does your relationship mean that much to you or are you just keeping a slight distance to be "safe?"

1&2: Yeah basically but that doesn't change how I feel.
I don't know what to do with these feels.

Break up right now.

No.. I can't larp today. He is really suspicious of me even when I am just getting milk lol

I have no Friends, I'm not that bad a of a person but lost most of my Friends due to me being more occupied with my father's alcoholism.

I'm 26 years old and stopped seeing my Friends after 1 year of depression. I'm fine now and retaking my life.

The thing is, after I was done with my problems none was waiting for me once I came out of them.

My family loves me, but that's all I have, I fear that once my funeral comes none Will come, or once I get married none Will come too, since well… I basically lost all my Friends.

Aside from that, my life is good.

Cute, tell me more.

Today he said I can't go back to "that china place" and called me several times while I was out... so I will obey him. Simple as that.

there's a black family that moved in across the hall from me. they're loud and won't listen to complaints. I'm thinking of plotting some way to get them evicted

you should get a no nonsense black girlfriend to sass him into place

>family member is a manager for group homes, for disabled people
>has two disabled sons
>doesn’t have custody of his own children, can only have them under supervision
Kek

I don't want no trabbu

Reposting this from another thread cause this one's probably better
>How attractive are married men to women really? I'm married and there's a girl in my med school class that I'm sort of getting closer with after trying to hook her up with a friend, but I can't really figure out why she still makes the effort of being friends with me after ghosting my bro. Wasn't even really friends with her before I set them up

wish i could off myself without hurting the people around me. I just dont see the point in life anymore. Had to cut all my 'friends' out of my life bc i realised that im the only one putting effort into the friendship. Never had a normal healthy relationship because that shit is hard.
i just wish i could die without hurting the ones that are important to me (my brothers) and without impacting other peoples lives, but it's just asking for the impossible.
overall: done with living in my shit situation and nothing EVER going right for me

>they're loud and won't listen to complaints
even the popo?

I hear other people say women are attracted to married men more because they've proven themselves and women like competition... BUT
I've never wanted a married guy - too much drama, being used for sex sucks, plus some of us don't want to cause problems in other people's lives. I wouldn't trust that woman.

My fiance is getting a geology degree (thats a "hobby degree" since he loves geology. He already has a degree in economy and works in the area).
We have pretty "adventurous" dates, going out to do trails, climbing, mountain biking and otherwise nature shit.
He found some rocks on our way to a trail that interested him. This was a month ago.
He gives more attention to these rocks than me for the last few weeks. I havent been kissed in a week, havent got a hug from him in the past 4 weeks in the least. (Sexuality is still there for him, but im so upset by feeling rejected that i cant be sexual. He resorts to porn.) He barely looks me in the eye besides dinner time or such (we live together)

Fucking rocks. If only i knew pieces of rock were more important than me...

though advice incoming:
what an actual piece of shit..... leave his ass sis, if a rock deserves more attention than you, I already know enough. Sounds harsh but yea
before doing all this i would suggest talking to him or going to couples counseling, since this is just plain fucking stupid from his side

literal rocks? or is this a metaphor...?

yup

Literal pieces of rock he found in the ground of the forest

WELL THERES YOUR PROBLEM, YOU THINK THEY ARE JUST "ROCKS"?? THEY ARE MINERALS! THERE IS A HUGE FUCKING DIFFERENCE HERE! MAYBE IF YOU SHOWED SOME RESPECT YOU'D GET THE LOVE YOU'RE CRAVING. GOD DAMN LADY, FIX YOUR SHIT!

have you tried bonding with him over what he's doing with/learning from the rocks? if you're indifferent maybe he feels like there's no connection between you two. it's his hobby afterall.

what the actual f u c k

Oh. He's a rock hound...

one of the common things she would always do is to copy my feelings. Like, if I was upset about something she would then try to say I did the same thing or she would make some shit up that upset her.

I bet she went from perfectly fine to "YEAH WELL SEX IS ALL FUCKED FOR ME TOO NOW."

She is not smart. She is incredibly easy to manipulate. She is also incredibly manipulative herself. Her favorite thing to do was try to become friends with the friends on the person she was feuding with to try to look better to them. To turn their friends against her "enemy" or whatever. It was fucking creepy and she never stopped doing that apparently.

Fuck you stupid cunts. Leave me the fuck alone.

I've given up on love. That part of me is broken and going nowhere. I can't fight it anymore, I can't do anything with it anymore. It's just wreckage.

I'm still doing other things with my life, and I suppose it's not fair or realistic to expect that everything will work out. I just feel like the part of me that had a capacity for romantic love is gone.

Yeah, idk... he keeps talking about kimberlites or smt like that. Idk what that is honestly and even thinking abt looking it up makes me feel depressed, so i dont... i think ill try talking to him again but he is so obssessed with these...

Diamonds form in kimberlites or some shit. That's why He's obsessed. Ask him about it.

remember, every singe one of my exes had borderline personality disorder. They are all fucking psychotic, jealous, lying, abusive as fuck cunts.

Everyone knows this though so whatever. Because seriously, especially in Iris case... shes the one that got upset at me for turning down a girl while she was fucking someone else all the while saying "I could never get over you that quickly.". She also lost her fucking mind the time I posted a selfie saying that it was too sexual (it was just my face making a face) and I was doing it for the attention of women while she had nudes of herself on her blog. She also locked herself in the bathroom threatening to cut/kill herself because I didn't want to have sex.

Fuck all of you. Stay out of my fucking head and go fuck yourselves. I'm done dealing with you psycho fucking cunts./

Ill try ): thanks for explaining that to me.
I hope he actually listens...

I'm a pathetic human.

Nice people are just assholes who aren't aware of it.

My gf, well now ex, just broke up with me. We were together for over a year. I feel sad, but a part of me is happy and relieved.
She had mental problems, and I kept trying to get her help. Months of it, she came so close to getting help. So close, but chickened out.
She did it because she couldn't deal with the stress she was causing me. I hope it was true because I was stressed. I love her, but one can't just sit there and watch as the person they care about falls apart often. I tried, and whatever happens now is just life. I hope she gets help. She really needs it.

I'm going to grab a drink and play some vidya. She was the last try I was going to give relationships. Now time to focus on me.

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I feel utterly lost in this world

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Its not (You) because you hardly ever notice me, hardly ever say anything to me, and someone like you would be forward enough to just message me.
But sometimes I wonder if you're thinking the same thing because I do the same things to you.
Besides it's always just a LARP, right?

If you think this is for (You) then you can contact who (You) think I am.

What on earth have I done. All I could think about is sitting on the couch, leaning against you and you kiss my forehead. I love how softly you speak to me when I’m panicking because something isn’t working. I love how you laugh when I say something funny to someone else. I love our banter and tiny inside jokes. I really really like you. I see that you pull back and forth with how you feel about it. I don’t want to put myself in a vulnerable position so this suffices for me. I hope that you find the courage to kiss me. I feel it happening it soon. I’ll be waiting

I wish I could be smart and do well. But I'll never be as smart and successful as he is.

Everyone's unique, play to your strengths and find a career that suits you and you can love. Sounds like you have an over achieving sibling? If so I feel your pain

The light bares all. The darkness hides everything.

You fucks criticize me but you should all remember that you're the ones that benefit from slavery and illegal human experimentation. All that money and fame they pay you in came from people like me and what they did to me.

You think I'm the shitty one, that I'm a psychopath because I would kill every single fucking one of you if given the chance (which, I will have my fucking chance) but the thing is... you all fucking deserve it. If you went back to the 19th century and gave a black slave a rifle, would you think poorly of him for fucking killing his slave master? Would you think that he was a psychopath or would you go "Oh ok that makes sense. That's a good use of a rifle. That's what I would have done if I was in his shoes."

Fucking exactly. You're all shit fucking people and you fucking know you're shit fucking people.

Maybe it isn't so bad, whatever this is, though it's bittersweet. Let's keep playing a bit longer, and find out?

Initials to who, from whom?

After a few years I've started to grind my teeth in my sleep again. The trigeminal nerve pain is beginning to return and I can feel my jaw subtly tensing and untensing while awake, despite feeling less stressed than ever. It correlated with:
-Working my way out of a split minded "shut down" state of misery
-Improving my gut permeability / IBs-like stuff
-Consuming kava

I'm hoping it's just the increased norepinephrine synthesis via kava consumption. I'm beginning to realize that I've just moved in a wide loop, and I'm witnessing again what made the me that came before. For now I still retain some of the classically conditioned tricks that will sometimes work to eliminate pain perception, but it's all fading fast.

I suspect I have two main alters. After months, or years, when one exhausts or meets with the right triggers the other takes over. All the holes I've felt in my memory and what I'd forgotten before, I now know. What I knew before, I've now lost.

One thing has changed. There is little fear. I will not be a trained animal left to sleepwalk through the maze of life.

Initials whom to and whom from?

Why don't you just put your own with your letter/vent, user, and see who comes up. It could be good!

light here, stop hiding things.

The Nazis weren't defeated with peace and love. The Japanese weren't defeated by extending a hand. The only thing they listened to was the sound of machine guns and fire.

Kill them. Kill them all. It's the only way they will ever stop. It's the only way this evil will be stopped.

youtube.com/watch?v=DGkUbvPsgNY

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I don't have to keep tormenting myself.
I don't have to keep checking up on you.
I don't have to keep replaying the times we were together.
I don't have to keep covering myself in the ashes of what we had.
You got feelings for someone else and you decided to follow those instead of me. That means you betrayed what we had, you turned your back on our plans, you destroyed trust, you lacked the self-control to keep that friendship at a distance, you lacked the objectivity to put things in perspective, and you lacked the honesty to tell me you were leaving me to pursue another person, instead saying that you were somehow doing this because "it's not fair to me".
I don't need to keep this around in my psyche. You were the guilty party here. You are the one that wronged me. It doesn't matter what potential we possibly had, we clearly had no potential because this was bound to happen eventually. It doesn't matter that we got along because I would have eventually been betrayed. It doesn't matter that we were making long term plans because those eventually would have been discarded. There are no 'what ifs' here. What happened was a manifestation of everything that was going on inside your heart. I was just a casualty of that, nothing more. So I don't need to hold onto this.

Initials to whom, from whom.

Lifes good, all that matters. You got plenty of time you make new friends

the hell are you talking about

Pack tf up and go somewhere else. Start a new experience with new people. Youd be surprised what that can do to you

what? why?

that's not what this thread is for, stop asking for initials.

Which evil do you have in mind.

Are you penis or vageen? Also this sounds like something I used to feel but it changed. You'll be back honey.

>PTSD: The post

pls elaborate

You already know how I feel.

Just curious

J and C.

Who were you hoping for?

...you love me? :3

Was curious is all.

I wish you didn't have the same reaction as the others always do; acting like you were doing me a favor all along when I decide we're through. Have some fucking humility.

I have dissociative identity disorder too. It’s killing my relationships. I have people inside me being punished for things they didn’t do. I’m in love with two men because I’m different fucking people and we all have needs. It’s gonna be okay, though. For you and me too.

V,
You’re hurting me so much. I’m not strong. I want you, it feels like I need you, but if you need to leave then do it. I’m thankful for time spent with you, you became everything but if you don’t feel the same, I get it. Let me go if you’ll never love me. I’ll always care about you and I’ll understand. I don’t have regrets... I loved loving you.

What response should people have? Happy? Peace and loving? Why the fuck would anyone have any response other than "I'm going to fucking kill all of them" when finding out they were being tortured their entire life for other's enjoyment?

One thing that's different here is that... I know I can't do anything other than wait. Wait until I'm free. Wait until I have more information. That's a massive difference and I'm sorry that you're too dumb to notice it.

Alternate reply: Maybe if we tell him that this is how everyone reacts he'll try to be different because lol being different is cool.

Fuck you assholes. I'll show you something new when the time comes.

Shut up schizo, I wasn't talking to you.

The worst part is that I know I can't do anything. That it doesn't matter what I do or how hard I try I'll still be under control, in a cage.

I could leave here but where would that get me? I have no money,.they won't let me earn any money. I would just be homeless, without medication, and fucking miserable.

I could get a shitty job (which is something they would allow since it would make me miserable) but I would be miserable. I would barely get enough money to maybe get my own place but I would have nothing in it. I wouldn't have internet, I wouldn't have furniture or anything. I wouldn't be able to make friends or meet a girl because they are controlling all of that. They want me to be isolated and alone.

No matter how hard I work I will never get success because they don't want me to be successful. It doesn't matter how much effort I put into making videos, tutorials, or streaming... it'll never pay off. I just wouldn't have freedom. They would continue to keep me in this miserable twilight of "You could be successful but never will be." where it's always just out of reach.

Soooooo I do nothing at all. Because putting in effort will get me the same results as doing nothing. It will get me nowhere. There is nothing I can do but wait. I can't fight it because they control literally everything. I don't even know who they are.

All I can do is hopefully outlast them. Until they get more bored than I am top the point where they have to do something to entertain themselves.

However, if they push me too hard something horrible will happen and it's not something that would be entertaining.

So I wait. Something crazy is happening, something akin to magic and mysticism. Things I knew could happen but thought we were a century off in terms of technology. It would be exciting if they weren't trying to kill me in the most subtle of ways. It would be exciting if I had someone to talk to.

I'm always sad :(

Not really, your passive-aggressiveness is annoying and unreadable.

Something amazing could happen to me. But that's the worst part. I'm surrounded by amazing things and nothing is happening. I can only wait and think and it's boring me.

It could be AMAZING. The idea that this could end with something good is alien. It's a concept that I can't grasp because I just can't see it happening.

Because again... it's true. All of these things are really happening. My entire life really is a lie. It's not just make believe. The technology is real. You are really invading me dreams and somehow putting me through some hi-tech VR shit. The augmented reality, the fake sights and sounds. All those videos and movies and TV and music and art... Either the whole world is in on it or some one with way too much money and influence decided to fuck with me. The point is that all those things are real.

But nothing good is happening. It's all just used to fuck with me. Why? What the fuck did I do? Why can't anything good happen? Why are all these amazing things happening but they are happening against me? Why do I have to be alone? Why does everyone have to lie to me and torture me? Why can't these things be used for good? Why can't you people just talk to me and tell me the truth about who I am, what I am, and what is going on?

You have told me multiple times "Yeah, we need to talk to you about what you are and where you came from." but then... nothing happens. You tell me in my dreams "We need your signature!" but don't tell me what for.

All these amazing things used only to fuck with me and to make me miserable. All the technology in the world used for this purpose. That breaks my heart. So many people.. . who live only to make me miserable. I didn't do anything.

even now you use this tech just to get in my head in order to spook me. To scare me. You've been doing it over everything. Parasites, diseases, illness, past relationships, car accidents and more. You try to get in my head to cause me to worry about things.

You try to get me to think I did horrible things in my past when I know I didn't. You try to make me think I have horrible diseases like cancer, alzheimers, and parasites. You try to make me think I have mold growing in my face or that time I talked to a girl that was 17 no means I'm going to prison as a sex offender. You try to make me think I raped ALL of my exes somehow. You take any little thought and you blow it up in order to cause me a little bit of fear. To make me nervous.

I know I didn't do anything bad with her. There was that time she was like "Not tonight." and then I stopped. Then that time I pinned my other GF so she wouldn't hit me you guys try to play up a "YOU DON'T KNOW YOUR OWN STRENTH." when I know for a fucking fact I have absolutely NO hand strength... so there is no way in fucking hell I could have choked her even if I fucking wanted to. The carpal tunnel kinda destroyed my hand strength.

You try to make me think I hit someone in a crosswalk when I fucking know I didn't. No dents, no scratches, nothing. Why would an old blind man/lady be walking around at night in a shitty neighborhood when it had been raining? That makes no sense at fucking all.

You try to make me think I was abducted by aliens when I know it was just the lights from trucks down the alley.

So no, I never raped, molested, killed, or hurt fucking anyone in my entire life. I'm not retarded. I know the biggest problem you have with me is that I'm a fucking saint. I'm clean as clean can be so you had to resort to making shit up.

I feel okay.
I am okay.
I'm really okay now.
I don't have any motivation to indulge in negative feelings.
I have separated myself from any negative situation and I feel in control and stable.
So.. a part of that is just accepting it.
And now I can focus on my goals.

>cat sprained its ankle or some stuff (its all swollen)
>cant pay right away because too much shit happened that drained all of my savings
>pay arrives next month but dont like to see my boy suffer
Fuck I'm so sorry Sam. Does anybody know if you could pay the vet later on after the visit or do they keep him until I can pay? I don't know anybody I could ask to lend me some money except for those who also need it.

call and ask, also see pet insurance rates

the last time you faggots got me to say I did things I never did. You lied to me, manipulated me, and made me think that I would get in trouble or something bad would happen if I didn't admit to the accusations. You even had someone there I trusted doing a "NO" or "YES" gestures when I talked about things steering the conversation.

Turns out that person was in on this shit and was there to coerce confessions out of me. You had drugged me and used drama to aid in it all. You played all kinds of fucked up mind games.

No, I didn't do those things. For all I can tell you people are trying to do it all over again so that there will be another event where you get me to admit to more shit I didn't do.

I don't give a shit if you show me video or audio of the events. I know you people spend an ungodly amount of resources faking things and altering media from the past. You change lyrics, you change videos, you make shit up. For all I know it could be edited in a way to make me look bad or completely made up with look alikes or CG.

I'm innocent and I know I am. I know the actual bad things I did in my life and they are not things anyone would judge me over. Especially considering all the fucked up shit you fuckfaces put me through. You people are not on my side.

You do not have my best interest in mind. I am not in good hands. You fuckfaces are trying to ruin my image, have people question my character so that the things you did to me won't look absolutely horrific and evil. You're liars and manipulators.

Don't believe anything you hear and not even half of what you see. Nothing is as it seems. Liars, cheaters, manipulators, slave drivers, immoral doctors, and disgusting human beings.

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Your caretaker is not doing a good job, hire a new one. Seriously, mate. Call a social worker today, it's painful hearing the world your brain is living in.

I was wondering if certain execs are purposefully sinking projects from IPs I enjoy in order to make my legend a little bit weaker. Like, I have an amazing eye for what is going to succeed or what is going to fail miserably. If it's something that I am into... it's usually something that's going to make a shit ton of cash.

And the people that hate me, they hate that. They hate that I have more say than they do and they hate that the things I like are popular because that just makes me seem more intelligent and wise and successful.

Pacific Rim 2 should have been a guaranteed hit but they did absolutely everything wrong. They got rid of del toro, they didn't bring back the main characters(well, not in a good way) and the characters they did bring back were not the ones people liked and were used completely wrong. The effects were cheaper, they removed the soul from the first. And they filled it with SJW bullshit that was just so fucking obvious.

ID4-2 they didn't bring back the one character that made the fucking first movie.

The Predator looks like a trainwreck of a film and looks more like a fucking superhero movie than a predator film.

There are a few others but I really can't think of them off the top of my head but it really just seems like they are fucking with me. If they can make me look wrong about these things then they reduce my influence. Except... I called this shit when I saw the trailers and then the movies. I was like "Wow, way to fucking ruin it guys." so I don't exactly know if their plan worked.

Film and Television execs are notoriously whiny and bitchy. They hold grudges like none other and they are all filthy fucking jews. The lot of em.

And seeing as how I am Hitler's lineage, I can understand why they are so butthurt.

Can I fucking go now? For fuck's sake just let me fucking go. Let's end this fucking shit already.

Also, give me my fucking meds you cunts.
How many writers and directors have you forced to make things about me? Is that why some of them quit specific projects because you are forcing them to add things?

You realize that your brain is all that you are and that is my world.

>Had suicidal thoughts since I was 8 years old
>Used to have intrusive thoughts about killing people during my early teens
>Physically painful meloncholy most days
>Anybody I open up to either insults me, doesn’t give a shit, or abandons me no matter how close we are
>Go on the internet to vent and nobody gives a shit so Idk why I’m posting this
>Can’t afford a therapist
>Taken to smoking and drinking to cope
>Doesn’t work but now I’m addicted
>Wish I can just kill myself but I don’t want to make my family depressed as shit

>The only two true friends I have in the whole wide world are my dog and this girl I know
>Dog is going to die soon
>Girl I’m friends with is too busy to spend time with and I don’t want to open up to her about my meloncholy and the fact that I love her because it will only end up hurting me

>Try not to wallow in my misery, but I am miserable most of the time
>Don’t wanna say my life is shit because some people have it worse and they are happier than me

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I feel like she secretly practices drawing to impress me. That would be cute if she came back one day and was like "Look I can draw do you like it?" :)

hate to tell you this but she doesn't do it for you.

protip|: she does it for me.

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Initials? To who and from who?

V.B to K.M

look it's my origin. I'm a bean person with an artifical brain. They scooped out the host bodies brain and put mine in.

ISN'T THAT FUCKING NEAT

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my biggest problem is that i cant figure out what i need to change. i just know im sad and stressed

theres lots of things i want to change but i cant figure out where to start

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Fuck it ive typed this and deleted it over 4 times now ima just get it out.

>Be me 18 just finished school being mega neet fapping 4 times a day if not more
>only ever had shitty week long or less relationships in school
>farthest i got was a kiss with a girl
>meet a girl online trough a friend
>shes a big titty asian girl with a cute face that loves vidya and music
>literally my dream girlfriend and all i have ever wanted
>i keep telling myself e dating is gay and i dont like her
>talk to her all the time when shes free and get to know her for 2 months
>first time i have enjoyed talking to a girl cause i can be myself
>she said she dosent talk to anyone but me cause she likes me so much
>say i dont believe her and she says here is my password and username for everything so i can look
>actually ignores everyone to talk to my fatass
>feel special and loved for the first time
>she says she wants to date and i say yea ill try it
>things are perfect it feels like
>shes super nice and always supports me and says she loves me
>reallyfuckinglikethis.png
>finally feel happy for the first time in 18 years
>9 months go by and she randomly just says she isint feeling it anymore
>tells me she wants to be together forever daily for months and then does this
>i freak out and get mad and she blocks me on everything
>crushes me and i legit rethink my entire life and everything i said

I know it was only a online relationship but this fucking killed me inside. It was the first time i felt loved and like i wanted to do anything in life. I started losing weight for her so i looked good when i went to see her. She loved me even though i was fat and poor and i just felt like stuff was perfect. I just wish i would of never dated her cause before i was fine with being alone now i miss her and want someone to love. Its been almost 3 months and i think about her daily still and miss her so fucking much. Only thing that get her off my mind is going to the gym. I just wanna fucking forget

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damn bro that's harsh, but experiences shape an individual user. So although it hurts now it may help you later on, and at least you started to lose weight. I would continue that path and just try to find someone new. Good Luck user

I don't know if I have DID outright. The thing I am now seems to have the greater access to my childhood memories, empathy, etc. I never feel whole, and most of my life I've felt like an amnesiac that only thinks it understands where it is and what it's doing. I have no sense of continuity and looking back I see things in discrete chunks separated by rapid change.

When I was 13 or so I remember beginning to notice lost time and discrepancies, and saying I "had to build a framework so we would have shared memory." At 15 or so I recognized 4 or so me's, and I was always afraid of having something I needed to do and being stuck as the wrong one. It happened often and I've felt like the course of my life was guided by a hidden hand, that biases the scales ever so subtly, but will come down overtly if I try to deviate from the script. The latter part taking solid form more recently. I saw these alters as layers put over a limited core self, and later on devoted a lot of time to learning to consciously structure memory, and to switch states reliably. I began seeing it as a matter of architectural reengineering. Eventually brought me deeper into hell. Nerve pain and inability to eat without terrible effects, combined with isolation, destructured and dissolved what was left of my mind into less stable, smaller pieces that existed within the superstructure that manages such things. I think at this period of time I was anchored at a fairly low level layer, near to this basic superstructure.

It all feels like another life. Some of my memories are very strange and I can't figure quite what was going on at the time. 7 and 8th grade were like that. I'd have these times where I'd feel a deep terror, like there was some force close by. I'd sit absolutely still for hours. I couldn't see it, but I could feel it, and movement meant death. Later I would arm myself and back into a corner. I felt like something was trying to force its way into my mind, and I already carried part of it within. That part was negotiating with the gatekeeper, trying to convince him. Most of that type of thing stopped.

I don't know. I abandoned most of what I developed and let things happen naturally, and it's now apparent from the start I was using tools that were already there and directing processes that had already been happening on their own. Most of my family is dead, I rarely talk to the rest. I have no friends. I live alone. I live with the assumption my memories and sense of the course of events may not be complete. I was setting my alarm the other day, it's a digital clock. I set it, and when I released the button the time had advanced 1 hour and 36 minutes. I checked other clocks, and they agreed with the time of that clock. What did I do for that hour and a half I was setting my alarm? For all I know when I lay down and close my eyes, another alter simply takes control, then returns later for sleep. And I awaken none the wiser. I found my front door, which is generally unused, unlocked today.