Am I the baddie?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 months. My apartment lease was coming up so I moved in his him 2 months ago.

Out of the blue he started being withdrawn and wasn't interested in me or anything really. Then he started drinking immediately after coming back from work. It wasn't just a few beers, he'd drink until he passed out then go into work hungover. After a few weeks of this, he got fired. I tried to help him get a new job or to see a doctor to figure what's going on but he wouldn't.

I had enough, so I packed up most of my stuff and left one night after he passed out drunk again. I left a note saying I can't be with him anymore and I hope he gets the help he needs.

When he finally came to, he called and texted me non-stop so I blocked him. The next day I get a call from his brother saying my ex tried to commit suicide.

He said my ex was asking for me and I should come visit and get back together with him. The way he said it and his tone made me very uncomfortable and I just wasn't thrilled with the idea, so I said no. He immediately gets angry and blames me for his brother's condition and attempted suicide and said I shouldn't have left him, so I just hung up on him. He tries calling multiple times so I block him.

Later I get a call from another number I don't recognize and answer it. It's my ex calling from the hospital, apologizing and trying to get me to visit and get back together again. I say no and he breaks down crying and threatens to kill himself so I hung up. I keep getting calls and texts from numbers I don't know. I don't answer the calls but the texts are increasingly hostile blaming me for the situation and saying I should see my ex.

I feel bad for him, but I don't need him or this drama in my life. I'm not being unreasonable, right?

Attached: q1z0ub6mazl11.jpg (649x864, 80K)

You should have posted this on Jow Forums and since you did not I feel no sympathy for the hate you are about to get.

>not married
>not pregnant nor have kids together
>not even dating that long
Naw, you're basically in warranty period of a relationship and he showed he was broken. I would have bailed out too

If you're deem yourself in the right, you'd be able to explain the situation to his family. Yoou'd say that he drunk himself dead everyday and you weren't able to make him stop despite efforts.
Right now it makes you look like a cruel, heartless bastard

>I feel bad for him, but I don't need him or this drama in my life. I'm not being unreasonable, right?
You unironically did nothing wrong, keep blocking the numbers and don't look back
Ignore the bitter incels
You would be much better off on Jow Forums

He can explain the situation to his family. It's not my job to. Although I think he lied to them about it.

>have existential crisis
>get depressed
>drink to ease pain
>lose job
>gf soon abandons you and pretends you don't exist
This just sounds really shitty. I can't imagine being in a relationship with someone I care so little about.

Alright, I'll repost it there.

you missed the
>refuse all offers of help

Dude sounds like a nutcase who isn't in any shape to be in a relationship.

>He can explain the situation to his family. It's not my job to.
Then what the fuck is the point of a relationship you daft cunt?
Dating isn't just for a quick fuck every now and again.

Still I woudn't abandon someone like that unless they were truly hopeless.

Maybe I'm just a better person than you, no offense.

>not my job
What was your job then? Compassion was not it I guess.
You Narcisstic per chance?

>date girl for 6 months
>she gets into a car accident and is paralyzed below the neck
>her family tells her they expect you to be her caretaker for the rest of her life
>welp, guess I'll be changing adult diapers for the next 50 years

Fuck off, retard. You'd bail out of that situation in a heartbeat

did you miss the part where she broke up with him?
it's not his ex's job to correct his lies lmao

Why would I take care of my ex's responsibilities after breaking up with him?
I tried to help and he didn't take it. I'm a bartender, not a doctor. There's only so much I can do and take.

>Ignore the bitter incels
>Denial of any points not in line with yours
This is textbook narcissism

Nice strawman. Losing your job after binging alcohol for a month is not the same as
>literally paralyzed below the neck

Narcissism is when a person tells themself that.
Blocking toxic people on the advice of another isn't narcissism.
OP literally posted here to make sure she was handling the situation properly, how the fuck could she be narcissistic.

>blatant projection
not everyone is a cruel monster like you

I don't know. Maybe to not get spammed by phonecalls from your ex's brother.

Even for practical reasons it makes sense. You're just heart-less and stupid simultaneously.

A suicidal alcoholic who passes out every day is a person in need of psychiatric hospitalization.
OP's ex should NOT be in a relationship right now as he needs serious psychotherapy.

The relationship is still pretty short thus the time and emotional investment isn't much. There's really no reason not to cut bait when your partner throws up a bunch of red flags

>I tried to help and he didn't take it
If you did so, you'll be able to tell what you did to his family. If you're afraid of them, send them a letter at least. My brother was in a similar situation and wrote a letter to the family of his wife saying why he can't stand his wife, how did he tried to amend the situation and why he is leaving.

He's in need of someone to tell him what a piece of shit he is, not a fucking psychiatrist.

Like I said, you're misrepresenting the situation to make it seem more extreme than it is.

>suddenly disappeared and left a note
that's such a cowardly unclassy bitch move but otherwise you are completely in the right

>man loses source of income
>woman immediately ditches him

Really makes you think

>He's in need of someone to tell him what a piece of shit he is, not a fucking psychiatrist.
he literally attempted suicide and ended up in the hospital
that's about as extreme as it gets

You did the right thing.

A similar thing happened with a friend of my sister and his gf, where she was threatening to kill herself every time they fought. I haven't hear from him in years but I'm sure he got roped into some common law bullshit (legal marriage in shitpost land).

I'm positive the retards shitting on you ITT would have dumped that girl in that situation.

You are seriously better off without him. Someone that emotionally unstable or dependent cannot support a significant other, and you're just going to fuck yourself over if you allow yourself to be controlled by that garbage.

Plenty of otherwise good men have killed themselves because their women abandoned them at low points in their lives.

I can tell you're under 20 and have never built actual connections with people

>Someone that emotionally unstable or dependent cannot support a significant other

so if a guy has depression he should just castrate himself?

This is one of the most toxic places on the internet. why the fuck are you people even here?

>if someone is drowning and panicking grabbing you and dragging you down too, you should drown with them instead of trying to save yourself


Women like you are the reason I dont date. Your solution to any kind of relationship problems is like if your phone starts going on the fritz. You dont even bother trying to fix the thing you just throw it away and get a new one and you left your man just when he needed you most just like 99% of roasties will do because in the end they only care about themselves or whoever is providing for them, like an animal. And like the typical roastie you use a literal (not like the other girls) meme.


Attached: 6573A074-FF70-4A6E-8B44-AE2095F2B010.jpg (420x410, 42K)

No you hyperbolic idiot.

You should look in the fucking mirror and get yourself a good slap if you are seriously planning and threatening to kill yourself over a failed 6 FUCKING MONTH relationship.

The other person does not deserve that type of guilt.

>3rd strawman in a row
It's sad to know over-emotional, small-brained people like you live on the same planet as me.

I think your doing the right ting here op, and i wish u the best of luck in the future.

Let me guess, you're against providing welfare or taking in refugees but you're absolutely SEETHING when a woman takes a me-first approach

No one is obligated to be the surrogate parent/therapist of a suicidal alcoholic. It's perfectly reasonable to leave the relationship over it. It could very well affect OP's mental health negatively; it isn't a "strawman" to recognize that possibility. She tried to help him and he refused.
It's not like OP was married to him; they were only dating for 6mos.

There's the blatant psychopathic 'me first', and the regular, non-bridge-burning one. OP chose the former and receives backlash as should be expected.

>literally another 110+ million men in the country the OP can replace her boyfriend with
>bridge burning


>tfw thought that was a massive braapp cloud

this place destroys you

This OP, sorry. Basically you look like a cunt because you didn't explain anything to his family. If you really wanted to help him, you would have told them so he could get the help he needed.

All you're doing is reinforcing the stereotype that female bartenders and cunty, tattoed-up Stacies that you never want to substantially interact with. But I know you won't realize this and just continue on with your day.

Guy and his family are crazy. Good riddance if he kills himself.

I don't know what kind of a shitty person you are, but very shitty.

OP didn't even have the decency to tell the brother of her suicidal ex why she suddenly left him. That's not indicative of simply leaving after trying to help him. More like she simply abandoned him after a few weeks.

you don't understand the concept of bridge burning, don't you? It's about maintaining amicable relations with parties you stop associating with. Not about forming completely new ones.
The fact you couldn't conceptualize this makes me certain that you suffer some form of narcissism.

>OP didn't even have the decency to tell the brother of her suicidal ex why she suddenly left him.
Why is this even their business?
They should be focusing on helping the guy and not harassing his ex.

Thisnis a female with hurt feelings trying to hurt others. Ignore the words, look at the action of what shes saying

>you would have told them so he could get the help he needed
1. I didn't have any of their contact info. We'd literally been dating for only 6 months
2. Now that he's in the hospital after attempted suicide, it's pretty obvious he needs help so it's a moot point now.

Obviously it's needed to help the guy as judged by them.

I hope you warn any future bf early on about how you drove your ex to suicide in only 2 months of cohabitation.

>I didn't have any of their contact info. We'd literally been dating for only 6 months
You had the phone number to the member of a family. Could've asked for an address, or just send them a message telling where you've placed the letter.
The fact that you couldn't come up with any of this means that you don't actually want to help the guy and the guy here is correct:

t. incel who's bitter about the idea of a woman leaving him for her own sanity

I'm pretty sure she wasn't reason he got drunk everynight and lost his job. She even offered help. With degenerates like you it's obvious why women chose chad and even the lesbian pill sometimes.

You're not the baddie, but you're going to have to come to terms with his family and friends hating you and thinking you're a twat.

>narcissistic, self-absorbed roastie

More like someone who can't fathom abandoning a person like that and just laughing it off.

>muh evil wimmin
Yes, women are never allowed to leave relationships ever, and if they do they must provide documentation of issues judged to be legitimate within 72 hours to all family members.
Fuck off.

>You had the phone number to the member of a family
No, I didn't

Shit attempt at trying to start a woman hate thread to be honest.
I'm sure some people will be stupid enough to fall for it though.

>just laughing it off.
OP clearly isn't laughing it off; that's why she made a goddamn advice thread.
The state of you brainlets.

>I'm pretty sure she wasn't reason he got drunk everynight and lost his job
why are you sure? You confidence seems artificial.

Hi OP, you're within your rights to walk away but you shouldn't feel vindicated. If you can't handle the responsibility of a loved ones well being and bug out as soon as things get difficult then what does that say about you? Because what it says to me is that above anything else, you're a selfish lazy coward who only likes things when they're easy.

I'm pretty confident with my basic reading skills.

>why are you sure? You confidence seems artificial.
>"out of the blue"
If the dude copes with any problem by drinking himself to unconsciousness and not even discussing it with his significant other, that's on HIM.
She clearly wasn't pushing him to drink.

>you're a selfish lazy coward who only likes things when they're easy.
This is the perfect description of a man who feels entitled to continue a relationship despite being a drunk who gets fired for his shitty behavior.

No, it's just that some people aren't as shallow as you.

What's the point of being with someone who means so little to you? I mean, why even bother? I don't understand why that would be desirable.

no it's not your fault if he does anything. you're not required to be with him just so he doesn't kill himself. God that sounds like a stupid thing to say.

So basically OP and her ex were a perfect match!

Did you even try figuring out what is wrong with him? Its not like people start doing this for no reason all of a sudden.

>stop paying attention to gf
>start acting weird
>start drinking every day
>get fired
>refuse help
>gf breaks up with you

incels are more insufferable than roasties

Those reading skills don't go much beyond basic I see.

>She clearly
How do you know that? OP is clearly reluctant to even send a letter explaining what happened to the relationship. If my conscious was clear, I'd regretfully quit the relationship and tell the family what happened. Would not contact them again.

Gtfo normie thot. You don't belong here, go off yourself.

Not incel with successful relationship here. I kind of agree that she was a cunt. When I'm with someone I like, actually care about their well-being as a person.

People are worth more than a note, surely. She may as well broke up with him over text. What a fucking bitch.

Or someone who wants emotional support from his partner when he clearly rejected it when it was offered to him at the right time. I think she just wants a normal guy that doesn't try to kill himself over stupid shit.
Anyways, she said she works at a bar or something like that. She should stop taking drunk losers and look for a normal guy if she doesn't want to handle with this kind of shit.

I think it would be good if you talked to his brother and made him recognize that they have nothing to blame you for, other than that you don't have anything to blame yourself for

>finally pulled myself together
>got a job and my own place
>get a gf
>start doing drugs again
>get arrested and lose my job
>ask gf for money
>says no and breaks up with me

Honestly, I don't blame her

>had a gf

>using words and understanding them.

Maybe she didn't really like him that much and the relationship was doomed and the guy's breakdown just sped up the inevitable

I agree with you, from reading this its actually pretty bad what she did as a human being.

>be together with some dude
>he starts distancing and drinks until passing out several nights
>a) somehow during this time I make no attempts to talk to him
>b) I try to talk to him but he won't answer me
>For several weeks I just let it happen without ever trying to contact one of his friends of family to find out whats going on
>shits getting worse...better leave him via a fucking note...
>he tries to kill himself
>act surprised

The absolute incapability of women to show compassion is absolutely astounding to me, every single time. Everytime I question if its ok that I'm gay I am reminded about what women truely are and I have my answer.

Absolutely not, you tried to help and he refused it, better keep distance.

Hello OP. Several points here.
1. You're on the wrong website. We're all broken here. We discuss matters for broken people, not normal people. You can talk about your normie problems on reddit.
2. You're asking for reflections from the most toxic, misogynic community on the legal internet. You are bound to get replies telling you that you are a piece of shit. This proves point 1. You can ignore the content of these posts.
3. Your ex-boyfriend needs institutionalized help. You tried to help him, and that is all you can be expected to do. From the moment he denied your help, he was beyond your capability and responsibility to help.
4. It is not your responsibility to explain the situation to his family and friends. But if you want to remain on good terms with them, you ought to explain the situation to them, in full. If you choose to do so, do not expect anything from them. Don't expect them to believe your story, or to take your part, or to empathize with you. Just speak the truth for truth's own sake, and let them decide what to do with it. Act accordingly.
5. Continuing to ignore your ex-boyfriend's calls will either transform him into a great man, or kill him. The outcome is not up to you, and is not your responsibility. There are many responsibilities in a relationship: Being his emotional hostage is not one of them.

If she didn't care, why she on Jow Forums trying to justify what she did?
Also...just the fact that she is questioning what she did means she knows it was fucked up soooo...

Ah yes because people with severe depression are known to never reject helping attempts.
It is not like known to be very common that depressed people will often reject attempts of help as they have a warped self worth perception.

Probably because having the retard's family calling her and blaming her instead of admitting their family member is fucked in the head sowed some doubt in her

You're doing the right thing. If this shit continues call the cops and fuck his life and his brother's life too. Degenerate family.

>muh voice of reason not saying anything new in a verbose manner

Remember when it was seen as shitty to break up via text or letter? I guess society has regressed so far that now we are defending people that are cowardly pieces of shit.

thirsty fucking betas and roasties, I swear...

Agreed, I feel sad for the anons that don't get this.

I've lucked out enough to somehow have compassionate women my life, and they don't act like the OP. But life goes on I guess.

>shitposting about the quality of a post
I wrote what I wrote based on what the OP wrote. Nothing more, nothing less. You're the one who's making assumptions.
t. neither a beta nor a roastie

Yeah it is sad, but that's just how culture is progressing, as I mentioned in a post further up...relationships are getting less and less intimate...apps and websites are making dating faster and really really change the whole dating game a lot. Not only is it harder for below average people to find a relationship, a lot of taboos are totally acceptable now like breaking up via text message and stuff. I'm lucky to be in a great relationship myself, but it still saddens me to see so little compassion in peoples lives.
Also its horrifying to see so many people not know that if you have severe depression and self worth issues you won't just accept help you're being offered and that that is exactly because of your current condition, because you feel like you don't deserve help. Anyway I'm rambling.

I think the main thing you did wrong was to keep the same phone number.

give him closure by visiting him and letting him know why it came down to you up and leaving.

>I wrote what I wrote based on what the OP wrote
Clear slander and action propositions were given with very little in terms of doubt. Glad that your willing to correct.

what did she do wrong, then?

I love how this website shits on women who stay with "abusive chads" and then villainizes a woman for leaving her suicidal alcoholic boyfriend of a few months.

No. If you're not happy with him then why stick around?

Attached: 1537127338510.jpg (1920x1080, 174K)

I literally spelled it out in the note I left him

>For several weeks I just let it happen without ever trying to contact one of his friends of family to find out whats going on
Why can't the guy explain himself? He LIVES with her.

>a) somehow during this time I make no attempts to talk to him
>b) I try to talk to him but he won't answer me
She said he refused her offers of help. This is a strawman.

>shits getting worse...better leave him via a fucking note...
It's not like she could speak to him at that time since he was, you know, passed out drunk.

The fact that she's unwilling to talk about what she did in the relationship to his family is a big red flag that she isn't telling the whole story in this thread.