Falsely accused of transphobia

So, I’m in a college marching band. In my section there’s a kid who recently came out as trans, I only learned about this yesterday. I was like “whatever” about and didn’t say anything. Today, I get an email from the head of my section that I’ve been “verbally harassing” him and I’m going to be kicked out if this keeps happening.
What do I do?

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Behold the radical left

Soon you will be facing this in every sphere of life

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She/he likes you...

I know, he’s pretty chill. I didn’t expect to be accused of this. Plus, I’m on a band scholarship. If I’m out , I’m out of school too

That can’t be true “he’s” “asexual “

Just give a sincere apology no matter how bullshit the situation is. Not worth losing a scholarship over

But seriously, I need help

I guess I could try that, but I had no idea what I said and if I asked what I said it would be insincere = transphobia

I think it would be pretty normal and acceptable to ask what exactly you did wrong.
Like as long as you're being sensitive about it and not accusatory I guess.
Could be something as simple as misgendering him on accident and you didn't notice

Talk to the band leader or whatever you have. Band coach? Ask them what happened, instead of the trans person. That way you don't run the risk of making it worse. Besides, he is the one holding your scholarship, so show him the remorse.

You don’t even have to tell them what you said specifically. All you need to say is something along the lines of “I’m really sorry for what I said the other day, I in no way meant it maliciously towards you and hope you can forgive me”

If you’re really worried then do it in front of other people so you have witnesses. Welcome to the arts industry lmao

>An accusation of transphobia by an authority is threatening my place in the college band. What do I do?

Come out as gay, or at least bisexual, whichever you can get away with.

It doesn't matter that it isn't true, people will take your word for it, and if they don't just call them homophobic.

>Come out as gay

Fool, homosexuality means jack shit in the oppression olympics. It won't help OP at all

This. Go talk to the guy who leads the parade with a big hat and even bigger stick who I assume is the band administrator.

Go to them, tell them your side of the story.

Unless there is something that you're not telling us.

Also, if you really didn't do or say anything then don't apologize. You'll be apologizing for something that you didn't do.

*drum major

sounds like a good option

Yeah but apologizing is a pretty easy get out of jail free card


Do you even interact with “it”? Maybe they got the wrong man. If you don’t really and honestly talk to him, I would call whom ever wrote to you and emphatically deny even talking to/about “it”.

I would ask them to be more specific because you are not aware of anything wrong that you said, and so cannot properly apologize.
Then you take it from there whether you actually have to or not, scholarships not worth losing over "mah hurt feefees" but asking for clarification could reveal an error in the report.

I think you should email back and say that you're genuinely unaware what they're talking about, that you have no negative feelings at all towards this person and you're unsure what you might've done to give that impression.

Then I would either approach or message the person in question and say "hey, I guess I must have somehow given the impression that I was harassing you or making you feel unwelcome, but I assure you I didn't mean to. I think you're cool and it was never my intention to make you feel otherwise."

I would avoid actually saying "sorry" because that's an admission of guilt, and unless you're skipping part of your story, you did nothing wrong. People are just being hypersensitive. So clear it up, but don't apologize for a misunderstanding

OP what do you play in college?
Tuba bro here

It'll get around that you actually did something wrong if you apologize for it.

Pit bro my dude

I would actually find the casual business speak needed to ask for a meeting or pull them aside for a 10min chat in an office. Say something along the line so "Recently I was accused of x", "I've only had one interaction with them where xy". I think if OP is there in person being straight forward and professional, he will no longer be seen as the one being the inconvenience.