Good Evening Anonymous!

I think this would be incredibly stressful desu. Having one girlfriend that you need to give all your love and attention to can sometimes be too much.. And then you want 3-4 girls that are always fighting over you and don't even get me started on the periods.. If its something you really want then okay, but personally I think it sounds like way too much work

Hi DC!
Plural Marriage is outlawed in most jurisdictions.

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Not same fag. Some participants have known each other for quite some time.

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he, uh, never mentioned "marriage" mantis..

Reasons I said girlfriends lol

Definitely not the same my dude. I'm pretty new the threads, but they're all good people just trying to help

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You're right. My bad.
Hehe ok.

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Hello and welcome!

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posted this thread here: no real response except to just leave them and I feel bad continuing to bump it. would you be willing to give advice to me please? thank you

i'm not sure i could handle the "huge family" part of that plan, it seems like far too much work, but personally it think something like that sounds like it could be quite fun..

Hmm 2 different couples kind like this, but one of them is incredibly unhealthy.. are you thinking more a polyamorous relationship, or would they not be dating anyone but you?

Honesty is your best option I think.. to me it sounds like there might be something more there than just friendship, but I don't know them so I shouldn't speculate. I feel maybe, getting them 1 on 1 would help to explain it.

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Ok, I read it.
Would you be able to sit them all down and talk about it? I know that sounds simple. But so etimes just leveling with people can work wonders.
It's when i keep shit in that causes problems.

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judging by the number of that post you mentioned it was the one i replaced to word it properly so - i am not the user from 7089 what i'd like is honestly probably far more perverse. i can't deny that something like polyamory could be quite nice.

Its not for me personally, but if its done in a healthy and responsible way I know it can work; I know someone that has been in a poly relationship for 4 years and they're quite happy. I don't know all the precautions they take however

Have you been with two girls before?

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Become better friends with girl C, start hanging out with her more, and grow slowly apart from girl A and B. You'll get used to their absence as you get better friends.

I'm taking a break from studying to play music because it's the only thing that soothes my fucking broken heart. So I guess OK? And no, there's nothing to do about the broken heart except to stop thinking about it. I'm gonna try to play some music with friends this weekend.

Do you want to talk about the broken heart? I've seen my fair share and I would love to help if I can~

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I need to start exercising. If I put on workout clothes and run around the block a few times, will people think I'm crazy? It's late here. What's the ideal time to run around at night on a Sunday?

I support that wholeheartedly! Music can do wonders for your mood. Even just playing around with an instrument alone can be a great experience., and a good use of time.

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Playing music is a really good outlet. You're most certainly correct about your broken heart. You'll think about it from time to time for years, maybe the rest of your life, but time will take away the pain eventually.

i just get how being with more than one person could be interesting.

i have some understanding of the matter. it seems to largely be a matter of trust and honesty.

no, i haven't been with anyone before....

A and B? A is a lesbian and they've definitely experimented with each other in college. I think so too but I'm also not going there. none of us have ever done anything

but also, how do I not get shut down by B's strong personality? she'll strike me down if I try to criticize either of them and I'm really tired of apologizing for things that really aren't my fault.

like I said in the thread, C is old enough to be my mom. she's nice and all but I don't think I'll be hanging out with just her. I've got other dude friends and they don't do those things. I also can't really just grow slowly apart because we have a set activity we do weekly (band practice)

thank you both for the response

I would imagine around dusk would be the latest time. Its still light out, so it shouldn't be seen as anything suspicious. Is that something you think is possible?

I work nights. I see people jogging and bicycling all hours of the night. In fact, there's a gym near where I work that's open 24 hours a day.
Anytime that works for you is good! Best of luck, and keep us posted on your progress!

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It's 1030 at night. It's too late to be dusk.

That's why I suggested one on one. And sadly, as someone with a big personality, I know how difficult it can be to deal with us. The best thing to do is to be firm. You need to make her realize how horrible of a friend she's being, and if she won't stop, then it might be time to spend some time apart. You said the youngest is 6 years, so it could be that they're still in that point in life that they think they know better than their seniors. They should grow out of it; hopefully soon

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Hmm. I think Mantis is right though. I don't think it should be a big issue. All you have to do is just get going~

Thanks anons. I'll see how it goes.

Hm maybe get some one (possibly girl C?) who is annoyed with them as well and confront them with that person. Even out the odds a bit? How many people are there at band practice with you?

I hope it works out for you!

You're welcome!
Just be sure to wear something reflective at night, so that vehicles see you!

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I'm the youngest, they are 6 years older than me. thanks I may try that, she will probably be more receptive without the influence. I'm actually worried about the other one, she's more dismissive (like she'll say "sorry you feel that way" or "that's the way you see things") and never admits wrong.

just the 4 of us. I'm not sure if she's frustrated by this, she seems to take it more personally. like she thinks it's something she did or said.

youtu.be/DP3MFBzMH2o

I always found this to be inspirational!

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Then yeah I think confronting B on her own is the best way. If you can get her to see your side, she might be able to help A see it from your perspective as well

going by his response i'm sure you're fine.

there's nothing to be done, I've been posting here for a few weeks but I'm getting over it.

dated this girl for a few months, we were really hitting it off well, she was my first 'normal' relationship, sex was actual intimacy with another human instead of just fucking, we clicked really well, started making plans, etc etc.

she went to a show with some friends and started acting weird. a few days later she calls me up and says she has feelings for a friend, that she's had for awhile and it's not fair for me, blah blah blah, the end. the mindfuck part is that i said if the situation changes she can call me, but i'm not going to be anyone's second choice, the idea being like, if she sorts herself out she can call, not that she can fuck this dude then get back with me. but i know she just wants to be with this dude. so the mindfuck. i say something like "well - I'm not sure how to say goodbye", and she says "here's what I'm saying - I'm not deleting your number" or something like that. fucking weird.

I've talked to several people, the consensus seems to be that this is a dude she's had a history with and that he made some play on her some time during or around the show, and that she's attached to him and never resolved things.

I don't think there's any more insight to be had here, but that's the situation. I'm not going to be anybody's number 2 pick, so I'm moving on. It's getting easier. the music definitely helps.

Hmm yeah I get that.. I'm currently in a situation where the guy needs to choose between me and another woman.. so I definitely understand not wanting to be second choice because I down right refuse to be.

I'm really happy the music is helping~
I find music is a wonderful way to heal. What kind of music do you like to use?

Why are you in a band with them? Also what kind of music do you play?

yeah you never want to be someone's number 2 pick. fuck that.
hope things work with your bf, but if not you'll find someone who is more into you.
I listen to all kinds of music, there's not one particular genre that works more than others, it just depends on my mood. Yesterday I was listening to bossa nova, today I'm listening to dreampop / shoegaze, earlier this week is was stoner metal and industrial. I love music.

Sadly I've never had a claim.. before I could, the girl that rejected him just a few months prior confessed.. its a messy situation, but I think it'll be resolved soon. I hope so anyway..
I love music too! I listen to basically everything

Idk some families groom their kids since birth to become what they are today. Usually its best for regular families to be modest which is why monogamy is important.
Unfortunately certain induviduals are born into "mind conidtioning," where they have split personalities due to higher forces making it happen. Celebrities are a good example on victims who suffer from being raised like this.

that's too bad, but it's not worth chasing someone who can't give you their full attention. I hope it works out!

I've been going to a lot more shows. I basically just drag a bunch of friends around with me. It's fun and it's a good way to unwind and do something social at the same time. So there have been some positives that have happened, although I don't know if they would have happened anyway, since I was already trending towards listening to / being around music more well before the breakup.

Ooo sure I'll try this out. Ok so I've liked this specific girl for about 4 and a half years. I thought she was just so out of my league but I got to take her to a prom sort of thing last year, made me so happy. A week later after that, one of my good friends start dating her (HE DOES NOT KNOW I LIKE HER) They seem great together. They broke up during summer then got back again and they're just a good couple.

Problem I have though is that I love my friend, like he's a very very good friend, a best friend if you will, and I love hanging out with him. Thing is, he trusts me with every little secret, so he tells me everything about his relationship, from the little fights to how he gets his dick sucked by her. It really hurts me but I just slap on a smile letting him vent to me.

I'm still good friends with the girl and she still flirts with me during classes when the bf isn't around. She knows that I still like her which is fine, she's doing it just to mess with me probably. But it just makes her so desirable. Again, it hurts.

The MAIN problem though is that whenever they're together and I'm just there third Wheeling, I feel so horrible. I'm just watching them grope and flirt with each other and I just sit there quietly (I'm known as the guy that's always smiling and laughing) ofc they realize I get annoyed with them while I third wheel. I really want to tell my friend that I'd like to just stop hanging out with him while he's with the girl and I want to tell him why but I don't want to be the cause for unnecessary drama. I have no right to make him feel bad. He's having a wonderful relationship, and the thought of me just making him feel bad about it just sounds dumb. I don't know what to do. I want to tell him so bad. He invited me to everything he does, even to eat with his gf. I say no occasionally but I honestly feel bad Everytime I do since he buys me food all the time and car rides and just being a good friend . I just feel like I owe him a lot.

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I hope so, I don't want to sound dismissive myself but it's doubtful. B is so easily swayed by her. I've actually never seen her disagree with anything she's said. thank you

well, I was young (19-20) and inexperienced. I responded to an ad and they took me in. we've been through a lot and I think they still care about me (and I them), which is why I don't want to throw it all away. at the same time though, I'm getting to a point where I can't continue letting things slide only to be attacked when I do it. we play progressive metal, I like playing the songs and I even wrote a few for us. thanks

Well, he already treats me more like a girlfriend than he does with her.. it seems like a done deal that he's mine, but the confession did bring up some old emotions. Plus, she got rejected not too long ago and we're both friends with her.. so its.. really messy.

I have gone to see more comedians live than anything lol I mostly just get a lot of music for my spotify playlist~

oh good. yeah he might be confused and needs time to sort things out but he'll figure it out.

I wonder if this other guy made a move on her because he was jealous, or saw that she actually really liked me. not like it makes a difference now, whatever play he made, worked.

comedy is great. i've seen some shows recently too. it's a great way to meet people too.

You need to set some boundaries. Sure its hard to do, trust me I know, but the best course of action is barely easy. Sit him down, make some guidelines about the content of your conversations, and how often you hang out with the two of them. You can even mention to them that they should tone down the PDA. I do understand you want your friend to be happy, but you have to be honest about the uncomfort so that they know to lighten things up a bit. If they're really your friends, they'll respect your wishes

I really hope it goes well with you. You can always try to confront A with B after you talk to B 1 on 1... This is how I would go about it personally, so I really do hope it helps

Yeah, I'm trying to be patient

Its possible.. some people just want to know that there's a.. back up? I guess, and maybe having her with you just made him want her because he could no longer have her. Regardless, its an asshole move to go for someone else's girl

I love to laugh~

Should I be completely honest on how I like her?

yeah agreed. whatever he did, it was a dick move for sure.

at least the relationship was still relatively early so it's not catastrophic.

man, I had a list of good comics I'd heard on the radio and I can't find it now. If I find it later on I'll post here

Once you get a gf of your own, this will be a whole lot better for you.

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I would be.. because then your friend would understand where you're coming from

That sounds great!

ill let you know when it happens if you're interested at all. thanks again for listening to my ramblings

The Cleveland Indians just won in extra innings!

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If they still care enough about you they'll listen to your grievances. If not.. you decide if it's still worth sticking around. I hope it goes well for you though.

Absolutely! I'm a little busy with school and sometimes can't always be here, but I hope I can make it for your update :)

I've been trying to get a gf of my own since I heard that's the best way of getting over someone. Thing is, I'm just horrible and making a move. I'm great at making friends and making people laugh, but I just never know how to actually get them. But I do admit talking to other girls takes my mind off of the girl I actually like.

Alright... Yea I think you could be right. Next time we're just driving, I'll bring it up.
But I can't. I feel like I wouldn't be able to. It's just such a hard thing to bring up because I don't know what'll happen.

It is incredibly hard to bring up, but I do promise its the best thing to do.

Then I suggest you keep right on talking to other girls. Sooner or later, you are gonna run into one who likes you, and is available.
Trust me when I say that girls know when you like them.

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Alright. I'll make that my objective then. I might not do it right away, but I'll take your word for it and make it a mission of mine. Should I tell him to keep it from his gf or should I just let the gf know too? She likes talking to me too so she'll want to sit with me and my friend which happened in the past.
Btw, thanks for just letting me vent. Even through screen. I usually don't get a chance to talk about this since I just don't want to cause anything.

Alright, thanks so much. What do you mean by they know when I like them? I stopped acting awkward around people I'm interested in so that should make it not obvious right?

I want to become more witty in casual conversation. How do I become better at this?

Another benefit of that is that a lot of girls know you. And you never know where that could lead. One of them breaks up with the bf. And they think, I wonder what that guy, user, is doing? We used to talk all the time, when he came in here for a cup of coffee. Maybe I'll send him a text and see what's up with him....

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I think just having the one on one with your friend is best to start with. I'm happy to help in anyway I can! I hope it all works out for you

Any comments on my post would be appreciated.

We just know.
Believe it.

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Hmm.. practice is the best thing I can say desu.. I took some drama classes so maybe that would help?

Never has happened yet though. They all think of me as that really nice guy who would be a great dad. The guy who always gets the marriage slot in the game kiss, marry, kill. I thought it was a good thing at first but it hasn't helped one bit. I'm just the nice guy to them so eh.

Thank you so much
Oh fuck off lol. Im actually believing in you for some reason. So you think the girl I like actually knows I still like her? She asked me if I was interested in anyone and I liked ofc. If what you're saying is true, she just realized I lied straight to her face.

Don't worry about this. She likes you. Not only did she remember your birthday, she even got you a little gift!
Like you say,your not overly invested in her. And that's OK too.
Enjoy her company on your dates. See where it goes!
I wish you all the happiness!

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She knows you still like her.

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Okay, thanks. I guess I'm just making something out of nothing.

I agree.
Just be sure to remember her birthday!
Good luck and have fun!
And you are welcome to come back with any updates you'd like to share!

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How are u gonna do Bella Thorne like this

Well greeeaaat, thanks for that.