My daughter isn't mine

>meet girl at university, fall in love and date for years
>she was doing a mickey mouse degree whilst I was doing engineering
>both graduate, she ends up with a 3rd in a bad subject so can't find a job
>love her so more than happy to take care of her until she finds something
>because of this I'm always working which causes distance between us
>come home one day for her to tell me she's pregnant, over the moon
>start working harder so we can buy a place before the baby
>her credit is terrible so I end up getting the place on my own
>daughter is born and my life is perfect
>3 years later I'd do anything for her, both these girls are my life
>still working hard as girlfriend doesn't have a job and is a full time stay at home mum
>don't even know what started the argument, I think it's because I was late for something and the argument ends with her saying "It doesn't matter that you nearly missed it, you're probably not even her father"
>leads to her a huge argument, insist on a DNA test or I threaten to take my daughter and leave
>test comes back, I'm not the father and it was some guy she was friends with and still is
>she admits that she's been cheating on me for years, first home and then someone else

I don't know what to do, I'm going to see the family lawyer tomorrow. I'm in the UK so there's no such thing as common law marriage. Problem is i still love my daughter even if she isn't mine and I can't abandon her, but I also don't want to support this harpy in any single way. I'm listed as the father on the birth certificate but I can challenge this easily apparently.

What i want to do is set up a fund for my little girl so that when she's 18 it's all hers because I know I can't be around them as my hatred for the cunt will sour my relationship with my daughter. I want to throw her out, but I don't want my daughter to be in difficulty either.

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Sorry OP, i can't even really think of legitimate advice to give you on this matter. But damn dude you got yourself in a ridiculous mess because of this stupid whore...

she's not your daughter and by raising her you are being a literal cuck

This. Dump them, legally protect yourself from child support, and find a real family.

You are being biologically tricked by your mind to care for another man's child.

Your gf is a whore and your """""daughter""""" is genetically destined to be one too. Dump them all, lawyer up to avoid child support, and never look back.

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Take revenge by making your so called daughter love you more than her real mother and try get custody, raise her right and keep her away from the bitch. But I seriously doubt that would happen.

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If you walk away now, you have the chance to start over again with someone who actually loves you and who wants to start a family with you. If you stay with your 'daughter' now, you'll risk investing all of your time and love into someone who isn't yours and never really was.

If you stay with your "daughter" now, you might invest all of her time and love into her. Then, ten years later after you've been a single 'dad', she might be heavily influenced by her mother and cut contact with you. In that case, you are left with nothing, having wasted all of your energy and love.
There is also the possibility that you keep your "daughter" and find someone who loves you and start a new family, but that will be MUCH harder with your "daughter" and your "daughter" on your mind all the time.
Imagine you'll walk away now and start a family, then imagine yourself ten years later: You might have a child of your own or two and someone who actually loves you. You can then still reach out to your "daughter" and provide her with a sound family, free of the harpy that is her mother. If she is so badly influenced by her mother that she sees you as an unperson and avoids you, you still have your own family.

So my advice is: Be selfish and save yourself first. Only when you have saved yourself (= start a sound family), you can try to save your daughter. Everything else means risking disaster.

>genetically destined

I'm not looking for advice from incels

It might be wise to help out with the daughter for a couple of years, maybe throw in money to a fund but really she isn't going to remember you from 3 years old. Perhaps try and take custody if you truly love the girl and provide for her as your daughter. I love stories like this because you're doing something heroic by wanting to take care of a kid that is not yours. Ultimately I believe that the kid will probably end up with the mother or want her "real dad" eventually but things *might* end up in your favor if you play your cards right.

This is all good advice
It doesn't matter if you love this little girl, your exgf will make her hate you and ruin your life if you stick around. You're not the father don't give this harpy anymore power over you

>acts like a degenerate
>surprised when gf is even bigger degenerate
Typical

hahahahahahahahahahahaha
>wife's son
>incels
forever laughing at you pathetic bongs

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Shit, man. I really feel for you. Besides the obvious divorce (which you should take care of as quickly as possible to avoid her getting ideas rom her lawyer that would fuck you up in the long run) I would suggest therapy and couseling to deal with things before taking decisions about the child. I know you come from a place of compassion and fatherly love, but she's not your daughter, and you may come to resent her eventually. You're being responsible, but you also need to leave a future for your own children.

But that's an outsider's perspective. I wish you the best, hope everything works out. And fuck that lying bitch.

you know, I would bet a shit ton of money that most people are raising kids that aren't theirs.

Just think, you've been poking a vajayjay filled with some other guys jizz this entire time. Every time you went down on her you were eating some other guys cum.

That's grossssss.

women are whores.

@ OP
A showel is a really handy tool you can use to dig holes. And the showel head is usually out of steel or iron. Some military grade shovels can be used to hack wood or even hammer down stone.

Here's a good showel. Use it!
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>What i want to do is set up a fund for my little girl so that when she's 18 it's all hers because I know I can't be around them as my hatred for the cunt will sour my relationship with my daughter. I want to throw her out, but I don't want my daughter to be in difficulty either.
Sounds like a plan. Do it.

You really think sperms just stick around forever?

Are you saying you think sperm stays in the vagina indefinitely?

anti breeding LARP cuck thread #10 million. These are literally posted every day. If the incels falling for this bait ever get a gf, you can fucking spot the red flags from a mile away and let them down easy enough to avoid a rape claim.

Don't listen to the morons in the thread. Your first duty is to your little girl.

This is obvious but I would talk to the lawyer about what options you have in terms of providing for your daughter while also screwing the bitch.

You could perhaps try for joint custody, with your girl spending half the time with the bitch and half the time with you. This way you can still ensure she has a father (extremely important for kids) and also directly financially support her by buying her the things that she needs; making sure she goes to a good school, etc (without giving money to the bitch).
This would also help you counteract any manipulation the bitch tries on your daughter over time.

You'd also be free to start a new family should you want it.

I know multiple guys who do this and have stellar relationships with their kids.

All this said, I don't know about the specifics of family law and whether this would be possible (especially the finance bit). It's something to consider though.

>inb4 roastie; cuck
Not a female; not a leftist.

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>your little girl.
Except it's not his

You dont need to be leftist to be cuck. There is still thing called beta male.

It's not his girl. It's some guy's.

As the other's said already, save your ass first.

I doubt the girl will remember you, and I guess the mom can ask support from the real dad?

You can still start a new life. I think it'll be nice if you want to help the girl somehow, because the life with her bitch useless mother will become hell once the milk cow (you) go away but at the end it is none of your concern.

You sound like a good guy, don't let this ruin your life because you don't deserve it.

>Your first duty is to your little girl.
C U C K
U
C
K

God praise our Emperor Trump

why the shit would you want to stay in contact with someone you absolutely despise with a kid that isn't even yours? The little girl needs a father but that's not his god damn responsibility anymore, now is it? If anyone, it's the "friend" that she is still friends with.

Raising a kid in that kind of hostile environment would be worse than anything. Honestly, fuck em. She's 3 years old, she won't remember shit and it's not like kids have personalities or would you have any real cheriished fucking memories with it. If the kid was older I could see that being a bigger issue but she's not.

she was fucking him WHILE fucking her husband you got damn fucking retards. For the love of fucking christ think about it. How many times did she get nailed by her "friend" and then when OP comes home has sex again? Probably more than once. Probably within the same fucking hour.

A lot of girls get turned on by that shit. The thrill of being a horrible person. Doing something horrible to someone innocent. And I guarantee she would make fun of him to her "friend" about this very thing and they would giggle to themselves over how "evil" they were being.

And yeah, sperm can live quite a while in there. Like, two weeks. Turns out the vagina is the perfect fucking habitat for sperm.to live.

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You have no leg to stand on when you're actually knowingly trying to become a cuck. Fuck off.

You seem to be on the right path, although the not being around part seems too impulsive, which is given after hearing all of this shit, but yeah, overall you sound reasonable enough to discern between the silly baby momma and the innocent kid, so visit her when this clusterfuck cools down.

She's not his daughter BIOLOGICALLY, he's still pretty the father.

>She's not his daughter BIOLOGICALLY, he's still pretty the father.
kek how naive

>Like, two weeks.
Aktschually it's up to one week, and it's extremely rare that this occurs.
>Turns out the vagina is the perfect fucking habitat for sperm.to live.
The vagina kills sperm almost instantly on contact. Where did you take health? The third world?

Ditch the whore and leave, she threw away your trust and disrespected the relationship you had. Kick her out and leave them, she brought this upon herself and she must pay

C U C K
U
C
K

It's not your daughters fault her mom is a whore.

Drop that bitch like bill cosby drops roofies

>Not a female; not a leftist.
That doesn't mean you can't be wrong. Or a contrarian idiot.

Bait

>The vagina kills sperm almost instantly on contact.
uhhh

So third world it was.
Yes vagina kills sperm very quickly and that's why the sperm is swimming in ejaculate fluid to protect itself

Kinda true. The vagina has a special acid mantle, but your jizz is slightly basic to neutralize it enough that some sperm can reach her uterus.

user, I think it's best you walk. I bet shell get custody over the girl and you'll feel even worse. But if you truly think you can keep your daughter you can try and get her custody. Pick your battles user.

>survive for more than a week
>kills it instantly
uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

The interior of the vagina is extremely acidic. This helps fight off foreign bacteria and prevent infections.
Semen is an alkaline. This lowers the acidity of the vagina which helps the spermatozoa survive.

Literally, LITERALLY sex ed 101.

He's right. It's a foreign body entering so the woman's immune system attacks it. It's literally a death race for all your sperm dudes to make it to the finish line. Sperm have it rough man.

you guys can bullshit all you want but just because you get each other to back yourselves up doesn't make you right.

Not to even mention the original post was about sex right after she cheated and not some time after.

You nailed two logical fallacies. You guys suck at this.

You are a good man OP, I'm really sorry for what you've been trough and I wish the best for you.
I understand your feelings for that girl but I think you should move on. The fucking whore will intoxicate her mind and when your daughter turns 18 she'll take advantage of your hard earned money. Sadly it's not your child's fault neither yours but life isn't fair, in the long run you'll end up hurt with a fake daughter that will probably dislike you and a lot of money wasted. You both are victims of the disgusting human being your wife is.

My advice is to walk away and don't look back, it will be hard now but it will become harder as the years go by.
Try to find a family that really loves you and pray for that girl to have a good life.

I hope it gets better man, take care.

I would sue her for reimbursements.

I thought.... I really thought American women were the shitty cheating ones. What the fuck? Are english bitches worse?

Talk to a lawyer.

If I was you, I'd try to stay in the kids life and support the child financially to some degree.
Yes, she is not yours, but you love her like she's yours and you raised her for 3 years.
Probably after a while you'll stop being so mad at her mom, and you'll want her in your life.
I wouldn't set up a fund but maybe make sure she has everything she needs now as she's growing up.

everyone here is missing the important point: she's not biologically yours so you can fuck her and it's not incest. wait til she's legal tho

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Around 10% of women cheats.
Men cheat a lot more, especially as they get older (40+) - around 20% of them does.

>If I was you, I'd try to stay in the kids life and support the child financially to some degree.
thank fuck hes not you lmao

Still a better post than all the incel rage tbqh.

If I found out my children aren't mine, I'd still love them and want to help them. I could never live knowing that they're having a shit life because I didn't help them.
I understand the kid isn't owed support, but personally that's what I'd do.

and then once she's 10 and successfully indoctrinated by her mother into hating you you'll wonder why you bothered.

simply put: the child is not to blame for the wrongdoing of her mother. Your education is procreating your acquired genes (epigenetics). It's not the same as a biological child, but since one can assume that 40% of behavior comes from the social surroundings, part of you can still live on through her and the generations after her. You should try to get full custody for your daughter and drop the bitch.

By the time she's 14-15, she'll start thinking more independently either way. Kids rebels against what they parent say all the time.

what an absolutely abhorrent post.

Parents don't own their sons, so fuck the biological test, you're the father, act so, do what's best for her and for you.

I'd know why I tried - I love my children and I want the best for them. Even if they weren't biologically mine, I'd still do.
The idea that you can simply stop loving someone from one day to the next, on top a child you raised who hasn't done anything wrong, is beyond me.

t. cuck

You're responding to people who have zero chances of being in the position to have children or to even imagine it. So yeah.

Actually I can understand having an emotional bond to a child that you once thought was yours. Trying to rationalise it and accept it though? That's pure cuckoldry.

I'm not arguing he should love and support the mother, I'd never be able to do that.

But the child is just 3, OP is the only father she has ever known. He loves her more than anyone, and she loves him.
How can you think that you will stop loving someone who is your whole life, especially when they didn't do anything wrong to you?
The child didn't choose to have a whore of a mother, I don't understand why she should be punished for something she hasn't done, or how anyone could live knowing that there's a child who loves you to death and you're ignoring to punish their mom.

She's got a father, but it's not you OP.

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The child has a real, biological father whom the mother is friends with. She should fuck off to him and leave OP alone, the girl is young enough to adjust to changing dads.

>the girl is young enough to adjust to changing dads
Are you clinically retarded?

What if the "real, biological father" can't provide for the girl properly? How do you "adjust to changing dads"?

I don't know, she still deserves to be taken care of. OP loves her. I don't see why he shouldn't do something for her.

She's 3 years old, give her a couple more years and she won't even recognise OP's face.

Some kids start learning to read at that age. Besides, kiddy brains are way better at absorbing information.

>What if the "real, biological father" can't provide for the girl properly?
That's the responsibility of the him and the mother

>I don't know, she still deserves to be taken care of.
Don't offload it onto the poor cucked OP. Worst case scenario she can be a single mom, they're all "empowered" and shit in modern society.

Even if it's their responsibility, OP still loves the child.
If a child you loved was in poverty, I hope you'd still want to help them.

>Worst case scenario she can be a single mom
She's never had a job and has nowhere to live. She's not really in the position to provide for a kid right now.

Again, I don't think OP has to do it or he's a terrible person. I personally would because I love my children and knowing that they're suffering would kill me. No matter the circumstances.

You're right, young children are incredible at absorbing and processing new information, but that does not translate into retaining strong memories of their childhood. If OP leaves now she never has to know him as more than the faintest grey memory. Much better than diving deeper into fatherhood with some girl who's not yours imo. Will it be hard? Sure but I like to think it's what I'd try to do in the same situation.

Of course they won't remember the minutiae but a dude being around for years every day and suddenly disappearing, isn't just some neighbour forgetting their pants once. She might not remember his face but she already spent too much time with the person to forget.

>I personally would because I love my children and knowing that they're suffering would kill me
It's not OP's child though, the actual father is known and a friend.

I don't know for sure but if the actual father steps into his proper role I don't think there'd be any negative impact on her psyche, so no harm done.

>It's not OP's child though, the actual father is known and a friend.
Family is not just biological bonds, user.
If you raised someone for 3 years and loved them like they were yours, they're yours.
The biological father is nothing more than a sperm donor at this point, OP is the father of the little girl.

well personally I could never ever see it that way. While I can't say for certain how I'd feel towards the girl after raising her and thinking she was mine for 3 years I can say without doubt that knowing I'd been cuckolded, knowing she wasn't biologically mine and knowing what a vindictive whore the mother was would absolutely destroy any chance of a normal childhood for her anyway. To stay with the mother would make me resentful towards both of them and she would have to deal with that while growing up. Would growing up in an extremely toxic household filled with nothing but hate be better than being raised by a single mother? Probably not, and I wouldn't consider it my fault.

>I don't see why he shouldn't do something for her.
You can't blame OP. It wasn't him that fucked up. It was the mother. It's 100% the mother's responsibility and trying to pin this on OP is typical female bullshit.

If someone showed up with a random 3 year old at your door and said "Take care of this." would you? Why the fuck would you do that? Why should you take care of another person's child?

That one sounds like a big if. OP appears like the only responsible person in this entire clusterfuck.

It's a 3 year old he watched growing up and thought of as his own child for 3 years. So quite. a different scenario.

why doesnt the biological father act like the father instead? he's the one who fucked, he and the mother can handle the consequences thereof.

Not saying that, I'm saying that a father is the one who cared and cares, not simply the guy who nutted in the mother. OP is clearly bonded to the daughter, the fact that she is not biologically linked does not matter at this point.

The most sensible thing to do is fight for full custody of your daughter. I pray to god she never has to be raised by that dumb whore ever again. I also pray that the small dick incels saying you're a cuck for caring about her get sterilized.

If you can't attain full custody, fight for partial custody. The kind where you see her a few days a week and your ex wife sees her for the other few. Make an arrangement where you pay for the girl's expenses until your ex wife is capable of doing so (if ever, lol). If the real father ever gets involved and wants to provide for the daughter... you're going to have to ask yourself if you trust him with that responsibility or if you want to remain the provider for this girl, and sort things out accordingly. But for now, custody is your #1 priority.

As for the fund? Put the money aside but DON'T seal it as a fund just yet. Keep in mind that 15 years is a long time and a lot changes between now and when she's 18. Your daughter may get in touch with her real father and want nothing to do with you. The real father may be providing for her by then. She may be indoctrinated by her mother to hate you. There is a large chance you will maintain a good relationship with her and she will appreciate all that you've done for her... but you can't be absolutely sure that the fund is a good idea right now. Keep in mind that your ex wife may also manipulate your 18 year old daughter to use the money for herself.

So, If it's not worth it in 15 years, take the fund money for yourself and your new family, and go. If it is worth it, give your daughter the fund.

All the best.

Sensible post, just what's the point of sterilising incels?

I 100% understand what people are saying in this thread - especially about the girl being too young for OP's leaving to do psychological damage. Its rational and checks out

But, I wonder if anyone saying this has had any children or experience with children like this

In my case, my sister had a kid. She's 2 years old, and absolutely gorgeous. She's a little bundle of joy. Whenever she comes to her grandparents' (/my) house she runs straight to my room and does a retarded knock at my door. When I open, there she is, at 2 feet high, beaming with a smile of innocent joy. She throws her hands out; I pick her up, and we trot off to play with some of her annoying toys. Or chase each other, or play hide and seek.
She loves her 'gamma'; she loves her 'gampa'; but the person she loves the most on this planet is probably her dad. Honestly, things weren't so good in my family before, but this kid is the light of our lives. I've never seen my parents so happy. This kid brought us together.
If someone came up and said, and in fact proved, that she was not related to my family somehow, I wouldn't give a flying motherloving fuck. I love her, she loves us; we're all she's ever known, and that's all that matters to me. I'm not giving her up, emotionally. Whoever that kid's family actually is, I'm always going to be her 'unk', and I'll fucking fight whoever tries to take her from us (even if it's not my decision).

I can't imagine what it would be like if I was her functional dad. But I'm going to guess I'd feel this but 100x more.

the kid is only 3 years old and she will not remember OP so long as he doesn't drag this out. The little girls real father is still around so he can step up and I bet he knows and been riding OP's gravy train. Time for him to step up and OP to step away.

Cut all ties.

He will think about the daughter every fucking day of his life

This.

Move on dude. Cut your loses, it might of been your youth years but you'll learn to forget it as a mere memory in time and you sound like a guy alot of girls will go for if you put yourself out there and apply yourself. God speed.

I haven't argued for OP to stay with the mother. I'd never want him to and I think it'd be a terrible idea.
But I also think that dropping out of the child's life and leaving her without any form of support would be equally as terrible.

I'd talk with lawyers and see what he can do from here. Leaving a child in the middle of the street would be awful.

I would take care of it till I can find a more sensitive situation, because the well-being of the child would matter to me more than some discomfort.

And OP's daughter isn't a "random child", she's his child. He has been raising her for 3 years. Even if she isn't biologically his, he loved her and raised her like his for 3 years.

>Leaving a child in the middle of the street would be awful.
If the child ends up in the middle of the street it is the mothers fault and the real fathers fault not OPs.

It doesn't matter whose responsibility it is, holy shit.
She's a human being, he loves her, I imagine he wants the best for her and cares about her well being.

Better than spending the massive amount of money and time raising a girl that starts looking and acting more and more like the woman that ruined his life all while knowing it's not his.

>wait til she's legal tho
bad Jow Forumsice

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Don't forget that the real father in case you want to stick around - he'll have the rights to visit her etc, so he'll be visiting you all in your house regularly. And if you do throw her out + kid, that kid will be under the influence of a toxic mother. at her current age, she won't even remember you in a few months time, so seperating fully now is the least painful option here. you can't save someone whose existence was doomed from the start.

She's not your daughter.
Bail before you completely fuck your life up.

Cuck.

Your good common sense shines too brightly for the average Jow Forums user

Dump the whore and the bastard.