I haven't ruled it out, but right now I don't want kids soon, and I don't want kids in 5 years.
Has anyone in this position changed their mind as they aged? I feel like 26 is old enough to have sort of made your mind up. I speak to a lot of my male friends and they're like sure, I definitely do want kids.
My girlfriend (25) definitely wants kids in her thirties. I hope this isn't the ultimate end to us, I love her so fucking much.
I feel sort of weird not wanting , but I don't want to spend all my time, money, energy on raising kids. I want to enjoy my life without restriction, without a handicap on what I can explore.
I had a dream a few days ago where I was holding a baby. The baby had this big bulging head, it looked stupid as fuck. It stared at me, and I shook it. Like, what the fuck man.
You post on Jow Forums Do us all a favor and don't breed
Dylan Hughes
I'm 27 and my girlfriend can't give birth because of her ovaries or some shit. We've been together for about four years travelling the world. I never thought about kids and i still don't.
Ryan Powell
I'm in the same boat. Kids aren't for everyone, that's cool. Your problem is your gf, though. It's not fair to her if your decision steals her chance at reproduction, considering that her ovaires aren't getting any younger, and she could be spending this time looking for a life partner who does want kids. And it's not fair to you if she expects you to change your mind and starts to nag at you about it once she hits 30s. Someone will get grow bitter and get hurt, if you stay together. Have you talked about this with her properly? Sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. Whether or not to have kids is one of those basic things a couple should agree on. There's literally no compromise to the issue.
Joseph Hall
>Has anyone in this position changed their mind as they aged? Yes. My nephew always used to say he would rather commit suicide than have children. He said it up until his mid-twenties.
Now he is 29 y/o and he says he is probably going to have children with his girlfriend within a few years. a 180 degree turn in a few years time.
Jaxson Roberts
We're taking the risk that one day I might actually want kids. We love each other too much to give it up. Like I said she doesn't want kids for about a decade anyway. I hope I DO change my mind in a way, I hope I do start to wish for that, so we can be together. I don't want to, (nor will I), have kids for the sake of us being together.
Camden Morgan
Wew i’m In the same spot as you, only i’m 27 and my gf is 27.
I seriously don’t want kids. I have some phobia at the thought of being a father. I really don’t want to pass my genes
Jack Parker
psh I'm 26 year old too. I'm a woman so the pressure is greater and stigma as well.
I was sure I never wanted kids. And now I'm sure that I might want one but only one, in about 8 years, and only if I'm financially secure enough. So for me it's an open possibility.
I think you need to really spend a lot of time around kids to know ehat they are like and how you could handle it, as well as making sure you really lived life before because a kid takes up a lot of time. I haven't met a married woman eith kids who didn't wish they waited longer, lived more, dated more, had more money. I imagine guys feel the same. Most are still happy enough, a few cases of people miserable and in denial, and a few completely happy.
Your life is yours and when people feel so adamantly about your life it means they have some issues with their own. A person happy within themselves will say "It's your life." And it is.
26 is really still quite young. Unless you are really ready or worry about time running out, just wait and live as you please. There is no set way to live.
Luis Foster
>want one but only one, in about 8 year
You sound exactly like my gf. She’s 27, and said she doesn’t want one until she’s 34-35. I’ve told her I don’t want kids but she said to me she’s really hoping I change my mind. The thing is tho, my mind isn’t going to change. This isn’t a matter of me just “not wanting kids”. I feel very uncomfortable even around children. I hate being near children. Just being near them stresses me out. there is no way all of a sudden i’ll Magically like them and want one. I fear those little monsters.
Hudson Nguyen
Im in the same situation! Although im 25 and my husband is 28. I really dont want to have kids at 35+, but my husband is pretty much undecided on the issue (when he was 21 he used to say the same thing this guy's nephew did ) Anyways, we agreed that if we end up undecided for too long, well just use part of our time to do something meaningful, such as volunteering in teenage shelters, NGOs, or maybe even adopting older kids (5-17).
Carter James
I don't know why you people act like having kids ruins your life. What exactly are you planning on doing that kids will prevent? Going out to eat with your other childless friends? Is that really meaningful and fun to you? You can also bring your kids with you when you travel. Your life will still be hard and annoying even without kids, it's the nature of life. Yes, kids can be annoying at first, but they're pretty easy after they are potty trained. After they can stay at home by themselves they practically raise themselves as long as you provide them with food and clothes. The rewarding part comes later in life, when they become their own person and open you up to things you never thought possible.
Grayson Adams
>You can also bring your kids with you when you travel. LMAO. Wanting this
Well that is something you two should discuss because it might be the deal breaker for the relationship.
I mean there have been moments and some children just every waking moment with them that I said I couldn't do it. One girl was a huge annoying brat, another boy literally creeped me out, I remember it so distinctly. There was something off about them.
Others have been adorable and kind but being with them part time is different than being with them all the time and responsible for them. I definitely was happier the less time I saw them a week. And you can't choose your child. You don't know how they will come out. It is scary.
Anyway some people are happy never having kids but no two people are happy in a relationship where one does and one doesn't and they expect the other to change their mind. So again this is something to discuss, I could even suggest a counselor as a medium.
Julian Rivera
Yes true. I plan to still travel and live abroad if I have a kid. The issue is that for women it is also a year or two off of using your body freely, working, and the recovery period. I can't eat as I wish, I cant be active, I have to be careful, and birth is a whole ordeal that is hard on the body. Even for a very fit athlete your body will not be the same after pregnancy and birth. For men they don't have that issue, but for couples that aren't financially well off it will mean more work for him while the mother recovers.
So personally I want to put it off and use my body's full potential.
Just some perspective.
Hudson Howard
Well if you're a soi cuck who can't keep your kid in line then you probably shouldn't reproduce. One good hit would put that kid in his place.
Isaac Peterson
We have discussed it. Just a few months ago I brought it up and made it very clear. She said to me she doesn’t want to worry about this now. That she loves me.
I don’t know what to do. I mean, I made it extremely clear I don’t want them. She knows it. But she doesn’t want to end the relationship now.
Asher Robinson
Thinking it works like that.
You don’t determine your child’s personality. You could have 3 very well behaved kids, and then the 4th turns out to be a monster
Oliver Jones
Well that's really the personal choice of both of you. There isn't anything we can say or do. Have you tried a counselor? It isn't like a psychiatrist, they are there just to be a medium while you discuss it and help the other see the opposite perspective. Rather than you alone asking people online, you should both be present and in person.
And you can talk to a counselor alone too, but it seems she is open and you are not, and I don't really see a solution.
Gavin Diaz
I don’t know either. I guess there is a bigger issue that looms tho. I don’t think I ever want to marry. She had asked me if I was closed to the idea of marriage and I said to her “I am not completely closed to it, however it is something I can never picture happening to me”. I’ve been trying to think more about it as a possibility. But the thought of me getting married seems very unappealing. The more I try to think of it being possible it just seems worse and worse. This has nothing to do with her specifically. She’s a really good woman. But, I mean in general, I don’t think I can ever marry.
Evan Sanchez
Maybe you like and respect her but aren't in love with her. Either because she is not the person for you or maybe you don't develop romantic love. Could you see yourself staying with her even without a sterotypical married life?
I really think it will hurt her in the long run and should break up sooner than later. Anyway don't live life with regrets
Joseph Lewis
I already waste enough time with my partner, friends, and family. I hate dogs and I loath socializing. My girlfriend already gives me my daily dose of interaction including stand to raise a child. >I'm 31
