Tell me what's bothering you, anons. I'll do my best to listen and advise

How do I beat off at work without getting caught?

I think a girl liked me but I took too long to realize I like her back. We don't have much in common though. I think I may have bored her to death yesterday. What do I do now? Should I try to ask her out? I feel like it would be ironic since although we had a good time at first yesterday, we hung out together for too long and it got boring afterwards. We are still just "friends" I guess.

Focus on other girls asap, look for new potential girls. If you think about all the girls you know currently I'm sure you'll find that there are other cool girls you could have a chance with.

> unemployed for 14 months now
> have had 7 interviews to no avail
I feel really desperate

I've lost meaning in life. Every single day it's either mental or physical stimulation.

Attached: 1506943213671.gif (500x400, 265K)

I'm losing more and more parts of myself. Playin vidya is slowly becoming a chore. I don't feel like doing anything. For some reason, I feel like ghosting all of my friends. What do?

Attached: look.jpg (550x550, 40K)

how to tell my gf she might be bipolar and should get professional help

I got out of a long term relationship (11yrs) 10 months ago and finally have made space for something real. Right as I made that space i met someone and we click insanely well. We've been dating for 2 weeks and were already exclusive. We hang out around 4 times a week at this point and i wanna slow down cuz I'm scared. Scared ill fuck it up or get hurt again.

We haven't become official , we just don't fuck other people , or even date others now. We haven't said i love you or anything crazy. Am I rushing into this?

Anyone visiting both the north and south poles on a regular basis should retain professional help.

Have you talked to her family about it?

I've been struggling wtih grief ever since my friend died in may. For the 9 months leading up to his death I Was the one taking care of him, being at his house anywhere between 10 and 24 hours a day from september to may. I only had weekends off in March when he got a LOT better and we hired someone to live with him. every other month I only managed to get 1 or 2 days off (non consecutive if I had two) that were generally for doctors appointments and laundry.

since he passed I've been devastatingly lonely. I had a rich enough social life before he got sick but a lot changed in 9 months where i wasn't generally free and when I was I was mostly being really emotional about him dying. One friend moved, and a lot of the others couldn't deal with who I had become in that time. I have one friend left and I love him to death and he does his best by me but i still feel incredibly lonely most of the time.

when he comes over once a week for a long time (8 hours or overnight) I feel really fulfilled and the week ahead seems fine if not exciting. If I don't get enough social time with him I get incredibly sad and cry when he leaves and have little meltdowns over how lonely I am going to be for another week. this has been the pattern for the last 4 weeks or so.

More than anything I miss physical contact with people who really care about me. I had two dates this week, one movie date and another was just a girl coming over to cuddle while it rained. Both were great dates, a lot of fun, we cuddled and had some light sex (oral, etc). but i never feel satisfied. When it comes to women I love to hold them and be the comforting man and all that, but it doesn't work both ways, cuddling with women (or at least ones i don't have a deep relationship with) doesn't do it for me.

in the time leading pu to my friends death I could just hug him and hold him for long stretches of time and it always made me feel better.

Attached: sad (5).gif (750x750, 1.87M)

If it feels right, it feels right.

Reasoning emotions seldom works.

conrgats on realizing your life is high in bullshit. you’re maturinf, like we are all supposed to be doing constantly. now try to fill your life with with meaningful things.

(and stop frogposting)

I'm planning to lay off dating girls in my school for a while, don't want my heart to get curbstomped again,

hell yeah

I'd suggest doing whatever you can for distraction until it goes. From my experience, time is the best cure for that, and you just have to wait for that. Keep it up.

I'm sorry it hurts you, user. But if you truly care for her - Let her learn that lesson IMO. It'll be the best for the longrun. Either that or she'll be happy with him. It hurts but that's how it goes.

Do you work long hours or something that you have to jack off at work? If not, it sounds a little concerning.

(Will answer other anons later on!)

Thanks user, recently ive been trying to keep myself busy and finding other interests like photography, music and vidya.

Attached: b04.gif (409x226, 511K)

Cant find a job since a year, live in a ghosttown with 0 jobs. Stopped working out, oneitis got another bf, im suicidal rn

sorry to hear that. you should try leaving the bad town before trying suicide. it only makes sense.

I want to move my RV out of my Mom’s driveway but I have nowhere to park it because RV parks are too expensive and they won’t let you park it out in the desert in the winter

Yeah i wish i had some income, but im very alone and no one to help me

Oh wait I actually can camp put there but only for 2 weeks. Should I try and hide my RV so I don’t have to move it?

You could try going to a church or a charity and getting involved, it can be a good way to meet new people who are hopefully good and hopefully helpful in your times of need if you ever decide you need their help.

Damn wish i could help you user

Im suffering from pretty bad dissociation right now, felling like i dont exist, and its giving me hella anxiety. going back on meds soon for it. any insight on dealing with that?

you’ve got some assets at least. depression makes people not see the positive. even if the positive is really miniscule, it’s what you have to work with to get out of that nowhere town.

do you not pay rent? free housing is an asset. is getting a job literally impossible, or just very hard? are you actually doing *everything* you can, or is the depression kicking your ass?

I’m in a similar situation but not to the same degree. I don’t think I can give up because it might be a risky thing. I know if life was good before, it can be good again. This stuff might apply to you too?

I want to turn my life around, but literally no one on this planet cares about me and I'm pretty sick which causes me to be fatigued at all times
I'm trying different things like programming or music but I have a really hard time forcing myself to do anything structured or consistently. It just seems impossible to me sometimes

I think I would feel better if I could work on something. literally all I want to do is work on stuff day in and day out but I don't know how to force myself to sit down and read for hours without breaking concentration.
It seems so difficult, does anyone have any good advice for this?

>felling like i dont exist
is that so bad? that's kind of the natural state of things after all, everything is temporary

I've been in a similar boat though I never took any meds. what I eventually told myself to keep on going is that regardless of how shit this is, it is a life. even if I am blind or suffering I know to myself that I'm still living
that's kinda bleak though I know but it worked for me

Attached: 1533411843707.jpg (500x622, 93K)

Right now is this fucking brain fog/dissociation
and generally is that i don't have a life (u know, passion, or something that makes me stand out)

go to /mu/ look at some of their essentials charts and listen to some albums. if you want to be legit about it install slsk and download a fuckload of albums
at least you'll have an identity then

or just listen to ^

now somebody answer my questions

Attached: 1510008753790.jpg (1920x1200, 439K)

this flat is not mine, its my parent's one they gave me so i can finally stand on ground myself. 1 year passed and I still couldnt find a job. You need many contacts to get one quickly.

I havent made any progress because i cant get this girl out of my head. She first made moves, seduced me alot. We spent alot of time together, but she suddenly stopped talking with me. It feels so shit guys, I dream most of the time of her. I cant see or talk with her anymore, because I dont wanna put myself lower than i am already. I try to forget her, but the feels hit me and because I am so alone. I just want to ask her why she did that move. She probably played with me and left I sometimes look up her profile with her new bf and it fucking hurts so much when she puts new stuff in there

I tried Gym, gave up after 2 weeks. But i plan to keep up.

Im naturally a very happy person, I laugh alot because I love to laugh. Its hard to keep on being a happy person when no one is around. Tried making friends, I toss them or forget em after few days. I dont know what the fuck is wrong with me. I cant be myself when im around people. Its like I change my personality into a very boring person. Only the people I know long, know my real personality. I can be very happy and bring good mood and tell jokes about everything and they would laugh, but THEYRE GONE and I'm here alone wasting my precious youth every day. (22) I believe I have alot of potential, I believe every person has that and I wanna fullfill it but something in my mind always says "no" "not today" "next time".
I never tried drugs, cigs, or alcohol in my life. Because I wanna live a happy, healthy life. But its hard to know itself's purpose in this world when there is no direction anymore

You might hate me for saying this, but sounds like your thinking has you in this state. You’re an able bodied man with a free flat, people who want to be your friends, and decent enough attractives to get girls you fancy. You have an interest in healthy habits and some constructive goals, and no chemical dependencies. Most people live in a less than ideal place and don’t have the freed up money to easily move, but they can do it with enough effort and intelligent planning.

Depression is absolute hell, I know, especially in the modern world where it’s so easy to become isolated. So that’s all the reason to look for ways to adapt to your situation and improve it. Setting out to actually go to the gym is a good start.

Nothing's bothering me all that much at the moment desu.

Some minor worries about whether I'm motivated enough to finish college with a decent grade or if I'll ever be able to find a gf but nothing soul-crushing.
I'm feeling pretty meh but things have been worse before so comparatively I'm quite happy.
I more or less have a plan to fix some of my problems.

i have a big head

It happens to the best of us, user. I mean, sure. She might've thought it was silly if you actually did, and maybe even turned off - But I can almost assure you she's not the only girl you're going to have a crush on in your life.
Do people really use email constantly in your society? Perhaps messaging her on facebook is a wiser move?

I wouldn't go straight to 'asking her out', unless you're willing to go 'all or nothing' that soon, which is cool too if you are!
I'd start a few chats if you feel confident enough in your text-chatting abilities. Don't try very hard, just casually chat with her about the things you like, just like you would with a good friend. Or perhaps, invite her to some cool party or an event with more people, so you could get to know her better but neither you or her will have the pressure of a 'date' at this point.

First of all - Ask those who didn't get you to work if there was something in your interview that you could improve or that made them decline your offer. At worst they won't answer, but you might realize why you constantly don't get the jobs.
Any idea why that may be, though?

What do you enjoy doing in general, if there were any? What was your meaning for life before you lost it?

First of all, try a more 'creative' hobby, one that you'll have a final result to - Like drawing (Developing your style, seeing your improvement), martial arts (Landing that neat technique, or get that power trip when you feel unbeatable in a sparring match), fitness (Very simple goals that improve your mental vibes and make you look better) etc.

If it may be something deeper than that - Go see a therapist, since you might require greater help.

Thanks for the advice!!

I want to die. What shuld i do?

how badly do you want to die?

>What do you enjoy doing in general, if there were any?
Lately nothing. It's just mental stimulation
> What was your meaning for life before you lost it?
Never had one. I was just doing what other wanted me to do or picked the least worst outcome of two

How can I forgive myself for being unstable in the past and hurting former friends?

I don't believe people's platitudes that "it's not too late". If you ever had a brief thought about something to be too late to be done, chances are your train has passed. I missed my studies. I feel trapped by being a dumb-headed twelve year old child into the body of twenty-two year. Everything should be done in time.
I am not depressed. I just face life as it is and it makes me insanely angry. It feels as if I chase the train and never catch up.

I don't know what to do. I work, I study at the same time but I never progress because I was a cunning child back then who thought he could fool everyone by cheating. I only fooled myself.

Attached: IMG_20181013_140725.jpg (1080x1080, 155K)

Well you could make a list of pros and cons. The thing is that in your cons I'm sure you will write "the unknown". Isn't it always better to be alive and wait for things to change rather than dying and maybe ending up in a plane of existence where you can't "kill yourself out of it"? Some people throughout history have found a way to surivive many years of great pain or through short but extremely challenging situations. Maybe you could look for as many motivational stories you can about real people before you make the decision.
You say you want to die so that kind of means you are free to do pretty much anything with your life since you've reached a point where you don't need to prove anything to anyone. So you could use your time to look for these motivational stories.
Another thing you could do is dedicate your life to helping others with no fear for dying because since you want to die maybe you have reached a level of selflessness that will turn you into the most helpful person in the world. You want to die so your time and money don't matter anymore, right? Maybe you find joy in helping new people you meet.
Maybe you can otherwise become an action double or a firefighter or someone who does one of those high risk jobs, like extreme sports or extreme fishing.
Is there anything you still enjoy doing? Maybe life is worth living just to enjoy that as much as you can.
But to be fair I'm very suicidal myself so although I don't know your exact situation I understand that life doesn't really look like it's worth living many times.
Right at this very moment I have faith in Jesus which is very rare for me because I always feel faithless. Idk how long it will last but maybe you could try reading a random scripture and see if it tells you something (if you are not a Christian I understand though).

say to people it's because your brain is big

()
(I'm not OP of course)

If you can, and it requires 'speech 100' like dem youngsters call it, try to guide her to saying it herself by the use of questioning and guidance. Does she admit that she might be bipolar? If not, you can be like "I notice that you seem to be rather mood-swingy. Is everything okay? Would you like to talk to me about it?"
Bring it from the place of being genuinely willing to help and make her life better.

Depends. If it feels too rush-y for you, then talk to her about it. Be very frank and tell her that the current pace worries you a little. Ask her opinion about it while clarifying that it's nothing that she did wrong (If that is the case anyway) and you truly enjoy her company and want her to stay.

To me, it sounds like you need to slowly regrow your social life. The little that you have now (The one friend and the dates) sound truly wonderful and I'm legit happy for you!! But you should expand it if it's not enough. There are plenty of ways to do that - From going to clubs or bars with your friend when he's around and meeting new friends together, to group hobbies (Like meeting friends in martial arts or yoga classes or whatsoever) or talking to people in your gym who seem friendly enough.

The best tip I could give you about it is be patient - Building a connection that's based on empathy takes time, but hell, it's totally worth it.

What's the closest place that might have a job? Start with that. Even if travelling there is hard, it's the little edge over life that might help you advance further.
Why'd you stop working out?

I apologize, I don't know much about cars and the like.

I don't have any confidence in my looks and have no sense of self worth and I don't know how to change, I don't even think I can. I already work out and have a good body, I eat healthy and do bouldering once a week. 23 khv btw

>Why'd stop working out?
Because depression makes me down and tells me not to workout today

big heads are one of the traits of original man
it means you have more primordial hunter gatherer DNA than those around you, which is a good thing

I'm scared of dying alone, choosing the wrong major, being miserable and dying an early death.

How do I stop giving a fuck altogether?

I thought big heads were a trait of the men of the future and that the original men had smaller heads and a smaler brain to body size ratio

I want to move out of my parents house, preferably to another city (or even state), but don't know anything about the real world. What are some tips for things like budgeting to make it on my own?

Attached: 1533391350007-1.jpg (600x773, 38K)

no people were originally short with large heads. people having large heads or small bodies is more of a recent thing and doesn't really make sense since the head is the most important part of the body in a lot of ways
intelligence has been shown to be adverse relative to height as well so like 160-170cm with a burly build a big torso and head is how an ideal man would've looked like maybe 10k years ago

*small heads or small bodies
having a small head is fucking weird man. big heads are attractive imo

I don't get why I simply can't stop crushing on this girl. It's a girl I work with and I've been totally infatuated by her for like 6 months now. I've actually asked her out 2 months ago and she turned me down. Even though I know I have 0% chance with her, my brain won't listen. Every time I see her at work she reminds me of how I will never get the woman I truly want. It drives me nuts.

Funny enough i'm actually dating a pretty cool girl right now. But no matter how cool this other girl is, she doesn't stack up to the girl i'm so obsessed with. Every single time I work with her, after i'm done with work I sit in my car for like 20 minutes just staring out the window. Depressed about a fucking girl I have never dated and will never date.

anything that is not apart of my daily routine causes me extreme stress and panic and nothing helps i'm in therapy and on meds

I start to get the feeling of "starting over again" but i just want to sell or gift my stuff(laptop, phone, ps4, clothes, etc) and start to get new stuff, but i dont know why i start to feel that way, what is your opinion doctor?

Attached: 148391319091.jpg (320x290, 15K)

Hit it off with chick. Been hanging 2+ months, typically see each other weekly/every few days. Every other week or so, she'll just stop responding to messages.. for a few days, sometimes in the middle of a conversation. A few days pass, I message asking if everything is OK, maybe a day passes and I get an apology and that things in her life are just a wreck. How do I get her to tell me WTF is going on? I mean I *think* we're close enough for me to get a bit personal on her. We cuddle and kiss even when it's not leading to/from sex. I genuinely care and want to help, but she's not letting me in...

I'm in the process of getting my spouse to live in the same country with me. But I'm getting crazy about sex and feeling jealous all the time. All I do is work and have the same monotonous days, I can't enjoy anything at this point. I really want to hookup with someone or get a prostitute and get this frustration out.

I'm split up over two girls
A: I get deeper on an emotional level and our humour is the same, but she is prude and doesnt really care for appearances
B: dont get along as well, but she is smoking hot and not a prude and really keeps up her appearance

I am at a loss and simply cant make up my mind.

Sounds like they are both not suitable to be a girlfriend. A proper girlfriend needs an adequate amount of both looks, and chemistry with you. Girl A lacks looks, girl B lacks chemistry.

hey user, thanks for the reply I didn't think I'd get one. (the reply to btw), so good news, I found my phone under some dirt and leaves over by the store I was being beligerant and smashing pumpkins outside of that night i was hammered... when i turned on the phone i saw that I didn't send her any texts or calls, was so relived!! But I did send a horrible string of curses to my aunt (that was intended for someone else) so i had to apologize to her, she was surprisingly cool about it...

As for 'my society' she's an internationla student working on a PHD and doesn't have facebook, and neither do I, but we're from different cultures completely so once I got the phone I got on Wechat and was able to get in contact with her. said sorry for being gone for a few days, i had 17 missed texts from her, apparently while she was out of town someone broke into her apt and stole her laptop and wallet with identification and everything, so she was really upset. I wish I could have been there for her when she found the apartment broken into, but i did the next best thing and called her immediately. It felt good to know that she trusted me to come to me for help with the problem. We're working with the police to get evreything back, but you know how these things go...oh one other thing, i told her about the emails, she said she didn't check the email and didn't see the emails, but when I told her I had drank and blackedout she actually laughed about it, so it's not so bad haha. I think I was harder on myself than she was.

So, take care, thanks for making this thread so I could calm down earlier today... :) you're the best!

(I'm off to sleep now, will continue replying tomorrow. I hope all of you will be well.

I used to victimize myself for 3 years since my recent break up. I was convinced that I did nothing wrong and today I came across some notes she made after everytime we fought, where explaining her side. I feel like a real scumbag for doing all I did. It's really weird to find unaware we can be to people we cause to others. And I can't even apologize now because I have no idea where they are now... I hope doing better than me.

this week I've been rejected by 3 different girls and 5 jobs.
I can't keep doing this I only have so much will before the depression is crushing
what do

Sweet dreams, you deserve them

Ethnostate brother

I'm in love with my best friend's gf. She probably knows because girls just know. I don't know what to really do.

>fucked around in early years of community college
>no vehicle
>have multiple Ws and Ds
>have been improving lately but realize my retail job won't be enough anymore
>non-zero chance that I'll be thrown out of home before I can finish my education
>mom goes on and on about killing me and throwing me out, then chimps out when I mention enlistment, trades, and driving school
What do I do here?

I really like someone but they don't return my feelings. You know the rest.

What's really getting me tied up is that I feel caught between the need to introspect about how I feel and the desire to keep the faith. I learned a while back that some things are matters of faith/patience, and that constantly seeking to understand, dissect and improve shit about myself won't really lead me anywhere if I never stay the course afterwards. But I really like this person and it frustrates me that they don't like me. Am I still just another salty "nice guy"? I feel DOUBT my knight.

Attached: 1485807572323.jpg (437x356, 73K)

How do I create discipline? I've always taken it all without motivation and it's simply that I can not keep doing anything I put to do. I've done things in my life, but I always miss out on opportunities for lack of discipline. I'm really willing to start developing and I'm looking for methods to help me do this

Attached: 1494736479038.jpg (1440x900, 46K)

repost, but I'm hungry for others' opinions:

everyone I know around my age (20) is out there either
-enjoying life
-working
-studying
and yet here I am as a stupid unemployed and worthless sperg without prospect in life. I dunno what to study. employers just shrug me off. tried uni for a year and quit it. studied meme short-and-free courses of computer repair and object-oriented-programming that are as useless as me.
I don't like anything. I don't know anything. dealing with people is hard, frustrating, annoying and unfullfilling. every entry-level job I can possibly acquire requires dealing with people, one of my biggest weaknesses. I got bounced from fucking mcdonalds, goddamit.

I should've stayed in that technical high school as a kid. I would have made better friends. I would've learn to socialize better. I would have a better chance at getting a job. I would've learn useful stuff.

I'm just filled with despair and hatred towards myself. I have violent thoughts. I want to take it out on someone. I wanna improve, but I'm lost. give me a hand. I need it. please.

I'm so lost. I'm not exactly sure of what do I want to do, and I have no idea of how to do it. it sucks to be a 20yo manchildren crybaby. being unable to be independent hurts like hell. I wish I was a man instead of a stupid lost kid in a forest who needs mommy and can't fend off by himself.

Under my first "crush" since 1st grade. Its might be mutual, but she's dating AND just got promoted to become my boss this morning. Haven't had experiences with women in over 10 years. Is she friendly with everyone, or more so with me? Why does she sometimes ignore me and other times start conversations?

I'm just fed up with everyone. Girls have been flaking on dates, my friends have been getting on my nerves, and I want some kind of emotional intimacy but I just fucking hate everyone. I'm worthless to the people whose attention I want and the people who do value me are annoying the shit out of me

kys

ASK.HER.OUT

Am 18 i dont have any friends i managed to get a gf in june fell in love and she broke up w me last month i still havnt gotten ove her she was my frirst relation ship but ever since that ended i feel like even more of an incell just beacuse i look like dann devitos under boob.

Attached: 31556611_410680836010392_8530474532178231296_n.jpg (150x150, 12K)

There is a girl ive been in love with since 6th grade(over 5 years ago) and my mind has somehow gone back to thinkin about her, i see her everyday and we talk 24/7, but deep down i still want something more than just best friends. She even talks to me about other guys, how can i get her to think of me more not as a friend without breaking our vry close relationship?

Be straight forward or nothing will happen

straight forward in what sense do u mean

what r some ways i could be more straight forward like i rlly love this girl

I live in a really filthy old house, and I don't want to keep my space clean because the house is so fucking nasty I don't see the point. Besides, I'm usually not home as I'm busy working. But I should clean up, technically, I'm just unmotivated by the other filth I can't help. Keep it clean, or fuck it till I move out?

How do I become popular amd socially successful?

The girl I'm trying to get with is a terrible texter. I thought she ghosted me a week ago so I asked her out after 5 days of silence. We went on that date and it went well, but she doesn't initiate conversation and she straight up doesn't respond when I shoot her a text.

Trying not to be the dude to text multiple times but fuck I like her and don't want to lose the opportunity.

Attached: 481607638426189824.png (128x128, 15K)

same boat

You never gave any good advice, this is cringe af.

Attention whore.

Should I ask out a girl that I only know through texting? Feels weird, but people have told me that in this world you eitger yeet or get yeeted. Do I really have no choice but to turn on Turbo Chad mode a just do it?

Feel ya, user

Already posted this in another thread but whatever, here goes

My ex and I broke up around 7 months ago. Went completely no contact for a few weeks, then after about 2 months or so she contacted me so that we could see each other. Ever since she's been trying to convince me to get us back together. I've been telling her I'm not ready for that yet, but my fucking heart aches for her still so we've gone out a few times since. She's really hurt over the fact that even though we can go out and be happy together, at the end of the day it's just that and we're not in a relationship. She's told me she feels really hurt because I always tell her I'm not ready.

Thing is I haven't progressed at all exactly because of that. Even after all this time I haven't done anything for myself, or taken any time to sort out my stuff so that I can feel ready to be with her. I don't know what to do now. On one hand I think she finally understood that I need time to do my own stuff, but now I also fear that she won't be there anymore when I'm ready. For context, she broke up with me for that exact reason. I'd wait for her an eternity, and she says that she'd do it too but it's too painful for her to just be waiting and I'm terrified that the only way she'll be able to handle it is by cutting me off completely forever. I wanna be with her when I feel I can commit to a healthy relationship, but the thought of that time never arriving is making me think about doing it way earlier than I'd probably like to

I still can't get over my girlfriend who left me 3 months ago. She cheated on me shortly after moving in with me with a friend. It's just a lot to deal with since it was my first relationship and I also lost a friend out of it. I've been blaming myself for a lot things that according to friends and family I shouldn't be. I just spent so much of my life with her over the past 4 years I'm finding it difficult to adjust to life without her

Same. It doesn't get better. It makes me question where I stand. We always talk about things we'll do together the next time(s) we get together in person, so I don't think she's trying to run away, but fuck is it frustrating. I did get her to say it doesn't make her mad if I text continually to try and set up dates. But I'm still on the fence about being irritating.

How do I break up on good terms while in a LDR?
I just can't keep doing this not only to myself, but I don't want to continue hurting her.

I wasn't made for relationships, at least right now. How do I tell her this without making HER feel bad? It's ultimately because of me, but I don't want to play with her emotions...yet every time we talk it's like I can't figure out what to say....and everyone ends up confused.