My wife and I have been married for about 3 years and since then it has been constant abuse from her. I've done everything I possibly can to mend the marriage, but she sees no problems, only that I should do as she says. I've given her several chances to change, but instead she's been manipulative and cruel. I need to just go ahead and divorce, but I barely make enough to pay rent every month. I can afford a divorce I think if I just pay for the divorce, but I have no idea how to do it and there is no real explanation on how to do it. What steps do I need to take to get on track to have all the paperwork ready so I can at the very least pay for the divorce myself since she would not be interested in helping pay for it? I Live in the state of GA.
TL;DR: My wife is abusive and I can't navigate through divorce, much less pay someone to do it for me.
Pic related, it's how I feel after trying to do this for a year but putting it of because there is no clear way to do it without paying someone.
>manipulative and cruel Why do you guys always phrase it this way? Is it from talking to other people about your situation and hearing someone say it and adopting it? Also when you get divorced they split the court fees. It's not so much her paying her share but her getting her own bill. Just go to a library. If its a university library they have staff that can actually help you either themselves of by finding you the resources and walking you through it. Universities usually hires good staff.
Dylan White
I don't pay attention to how most men phrase divorce, but she certainly isn't physically abusive. I've been force to live in a corner of my own home that I page equal rent for because she has OCD and would rather me live in the attic than to have any of my possessions (most of which I left behind to live with her) in visible sight.
But that's just the current flavor of the week. She's destroyed property of mine. Alienated my friends. Lies for her own benefit. Constantly puts me down. Treats me like a object and not like a person. If I give an opinion it is met with belittling. If I give a criticism it is met with animosity. If I share my feelings they are laughed at.
The list goes on. It's pretty shitty.
Cooper Martin
>only that i should do as she says >i've given her chances to change
who's abusive here
also google legal aid in your city
Lincoln Garcia
>shes forcing me in the attic Is she physically or verbally forcing you in the attic? If you are choosing to be in the attic then that's not abuse. But you don't need abuse to justify divorce. There are plenty of resources online and in person.
James Foster
Maybe just get a $49 plane ticket and move to another state and start life over.
Lucas Baker
I'm not gonna sit here and pretend I haven't raised my voice or gotten angry and produced abusive behavior, but a lot of that comes from her lack of empathy towards me from where I'm sitting. Most the time I'm pretty lifeless when we fight because I'm so used to her yelling at me and insulting my intelligence.
Physically moves my stuff up there and yells at me when I take it down. Take it how you will.
Considered it, but I need stability first if that's even an option. Tying up loose ends in a legal sense is generally a good idea.
Benjamin Wright
>Physically moves my stuff You know what thats called? That's called "she won't let me have my stuff downstairs." If you are calling that abuse then you are looking for sob points.
Jeremiah Murphy
Cool. Glad you feel that way. You clearly have an innate grasp on my situation and the magnitude of my frivolous actions. I think I'll just go enjoy the company of my amazing wife who the only issue I have with them is regarding space in the house. Yes, nothing else. Only that. Thank you for helping me see the light.
Nolan Barnes
That's the story YOU think of when it comes to abuse not me. That's the leading story to let us know your struggle.
Evan Walker
And you wanted to play devils advocate to try and make a point, but I didn't ask for this. I had a specific question so idk what you're issue is.
Jaxon Torres
>Considered it, but I need stability first if that's even an option.
OK the stability comes from not being abused any longer. Worry about legal paperwork later.
Christian Perry
Family lawyer here. Unless you're divorcing amicably, it's going to cost you. If you can't afford a lawyer, what you could do is just move out and wait for her to initiate proceedings.
Matthew Sanchez
Which was my point hereBecause he shouldn’t be in a hurry to get into a new relationship.
He should just wait for her to go somewhere as per her schedule and be prepared to leave and never return.
Jason Perry
Who's talking about starting a new relationship?
Hudson Allen
Then don’t worry about legal loose ends.
Just get yourself out of there. The more distance between her and you the better. Seriously jump states. It will give you peace of mind.
Jaxon Brown
Are you replying to the right person?
Jackson Ortiz
Rum from this cunt. That's it.
Adam Martin
Well you’re coming across as OP...
Jack Taylor
Save up some money and talk to a divorce lawyer. He will tell you what steps to take and how much it will cost. And holy fuck dude, how did you let it get to this? Sure she's a bitch but you failed to train and manage her, it's your own damn fault. Best you can do now is get the fuck out. Do whatever it takes, work extra shifts if you have to, but don't stay with that person for another year
Ethan Peterson
He should just walk away.
It’s not the type of situation that one should do”do the right thing”.
His personal safety and right to not be abused is more important than a divorce at this point.
Ethan Williams
OP here. Thanks for the support, and the criticism. It's an uncontested divorce. We tried before and she was mad, but she feels like if I want to leave that I'm just messed in the head and would let me do it cause if she tries to tell me to stay she's saying she admitting to having issues and in her mind there are none.
Luke Morgan
Lol. Holy shit you have it easy. I know men that have lost 1 million dollars in a divorce.
Like just move out. She'll do the rest. You have NOTHING to worry about as you have no money and no assets. So like just leave. and uh divorce.
I'm not even sure what you're asking. Divorce is 95% financial. The money has to get split up. If there is no money and no house, that should be one fucking easy divorce you just get some paperwork and you both sign it.
Jose Wood
God, this sounds very similar to my ex-wife. Though, mine would threaten divorce to get what she wanted, like getting pregnant when we were about to move states and weren't financially stable. 3years in we were supposed to go on a vacation together, but the fighting got so bad leading up to it i bailed and she went alone. Used the time to get a new apartment and start moving out. She took care of the paperwork after that.
Nicholas Rodriguez
The only time a man needs a divorce is if you have property to divide.
If you are fucking brokey broke, just leave and fuck it.
Landon Roberts
She's done that, threaten to divorce me when I disagree with her. Then I walked out on her. Now it's "You can go live in the guest bedroom" Which is what I'm going to do. I just moved back in cause she was making an effort but it was all it show to get me back it would seem.
William Rodriguez
If I plan on dating again I gotta divorce, and I do when I get the divorce. I'm only 26.
Yeah the paperwork is spaghetti. I really want some legal help with it cause like there's no instructions or explanations for any of the documents or if I need anything.
