A while ago I was posting on here about my gf meeting her ex-bf from HS who is now a junkie in our apartment for dinner...

Don't allow goin around get unless you're there, that's a safety hazard you retard. What if he brings the whole crew to gang bang and come up quick when you're not there? Or he could show up high and violent.

And of course she's getting tempted to fuck him for old times sake. Put your foot down man.

Fucking excellent point. Last time she scheduled it for when OP was at work and made him promise not to come home early. OP felt relieved when he saw he was a junkie loser but it he hadn't been she would have been on her knees.

>Don't allow goin around get unless you're there, that's a safety hazard you retard
This. And that's being gentle, really. How would she react if the parts were inverted and you were the one having "private talks" with your ex-gf while she isn't there OP?

I remember it OP and commented so this update is not surprising. I don't believe there is anything you can say or do that will stop her. She knows you aren't going to go anywhere and you won't throw her out though you are paying for everything. You realize they made plans, knowing your schedule and its likely he will sleep over and you won't have a clue or a say. Coming next, you'll see his shit when you come home and she'll tell you he's going to stay a while until he can get on his feet.

What the fuck are you thinking is really the question. I find it amazing you believe nothing is going on between them when she hides this shit and springs it on you.

As for what she is thinking. She wants a relationship with her ex and using an excuse of help to justify this and keep you quiet.

they could have private talks by phone but this is an evening at OP's. They would be out on a date if the ex or OP's gf had a job and money of their own. Both are flat ass broke but who needs a place of their own or a hotel to fuck in when you can do it at OP's.

>with a pathetic junkie? She would probably lose all respect for herself if she did.
That's your entire argument for her not cheating? Her own standards? Wew lad. Start getting some self respect yourself, you know you're being played yet you don't want to do anything about her doing her things behind your back.

OP is a pathetic joke

You're getting cucked. YOU. ARE. GETTING. KEKED.

Now fucking man up faggot and put this bitch in her place. Or, find the guy and beat the shit out of him, if he really is a junky he should be weak and feeble as fuck.

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Informing you and after saying "You're not jealous are you, haha" isn't a good sign.

I generally do not like jumping on the "cheating" bandwagon, but as a woman.. the fact she did it in that order tells me she expected you to be jealous, but hoped wouldn't be so her conscience was clear.

She's probably on the fence about this guy, you need to put your foot down immediately. It's both of your apartment, and this is a clear and obvious violation of trust and boundaries.

I remember you, and the kool-aid you drink.

She clearly knows she can get away with it. Do what you want, but she no longer respects you no matter what she's doing for or to this guy. Whether you choose to accept that fact is irrelevant to us, but it is what it is.

I feel you my guy.
You are probably a really decent guy, with a strong moral code.
Right now you are seeing this from a logical point of view, but the thing is that most people dont guide themselves with logic.
Even if she is not cheating on you she is getting a close emotional connection to some esle that isnt you. That should be your first red flag.
I hope wake up and see that people arent as nice or correct as you.

I member

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>go to the advice board
>straight up ignore all the advice given if it doesn't fit your narrative
Why even bother OP?

Dude you’re a cuck, go fap in the corner like a good faggot while a junkie plows your whore, lol.

The first time was a test. She wasn't going to fuck him then. She needed to see how would react. She now knows you're weak. She will end up fucking him this time, or maybe the next but it won't be long. Unbelievable she waited til you left town to do it again. She doesn't sound like a very good person

lmao you're so fucking innocent
I remember being this innocent when I was 14

Fuck guys, my skin is crawling right now.
I was thinking about calling her randomly, but really, what good would that do?

I feel like I made myself very clear last time. Apparently I didn't.
One the one hand I trust her, but trust only goes so far and this whole situation is fishy...
We have been together for so long, the only way I see myself breaking up with her is if I had definite proof of her cheating. But I know, no matter what happens or doesnt happen, I won't have certainty.
I really want to believe her narrative of Good Samaritan, but I'm not stupid either...
Logically, it doesn't make sense for her to jeopardize a stable, loving serious relationship with someone who cares and provides for her - for someone who is clearly irresponsible, unreliable and unattractive. I just dont get it.

>make sense
And why would it need to? Making sense would be breaking off a bad relationship.

But that's never usually how cheating happens, is it-- no, there's usually an element of someone not telling the other about how they feel. And then the other side tells themselves over and over, "It can't be happening. It can't be happening." Because they assume their investment is identical value to their partner's... but oh, it never starts that way, does it...?

The fact is, you're choosing to put your head in the sand on this one. You know what's going on; you drew the line clearly. She knows what's up and knows you're smart enough to connect two and two and figure it out sans evidence or implication. And that's why you're here-- because, knowing full well the only reason she'd violate your trust is because it no longer holds any value to her whatsoever, the only thing you can do is defend her or hope somebody online does it for you.
After all, you know, I know, every user here knows-- she has a modus operandi by now. It's an act. It has parts, functions, delivers results.

The question then, is this: next time you leave, will you come back to your quiet, empty home, your own personal sanctuary-- or will you be coming home to her hidden act and clean-up, the aftermath of stories you can only surmise and pretend about?

Just check nooks and crannies and shoes when you're back home, OP. Drug dealers aren't known for their altruism or care for other livelihoods. Who knows what your girl has de facto accepted to mule for her idiot friend.

And as for you I sincerely hope you stop telling yourself this isn't what it exactly is, and what we all see it for, OP. I truly do.

But in the same phone call yesterday we made plans to visit her family on Christmas and book flights for New year's Eve, why the fuck would she agree to a long term commitment like this if she was up to something?
The whole thing just doesn't add up

Cheating never usually adds up and it's not like she's gonna tell you she's cheating. Cheating is usually the product of internal conflict to begin with.

If you don't want to accept that bad things are happening then get off Jow Forums man, you're just gonna hear the same shit over n over.

>with someone who cares and provides for her - for someone who is clearly irresponsible, unreliable and unattractive.
Once again your only argument boils down to you being a "so much better" person than that junkie... really? Have you considered that she may not give a single fuck about that?
I'm not surprised that she's doing this shit so blatantly, if she can get away with it so easily.

Why choose between two slices when I can have the entire pizza?

>Logically, it doesn't make sense for her to jeopardize a stable, loving serious relationship with someone who cares and provides for her - for someone who is clearly irresponsible, unreliable and unattractive. I just dont get it.

Think of it like this - it is your home, the safe place for your (to be) family. She wants to bring in a dangerous guy (drug addict) who could do _anything_ unpredictable to her because you are not around, and you FUCKING LET HER?
Don't you have any fucking security concerns? She is acting childish because she wants to see if you are fit to protect her and possibly her children. Why is she testing you? Because you have given her reason to mistrust you. By just letting this happen, she knows you are unfit to protect her and her children. There is no reason to pursue a longer relationship with you, she is probably staying until she found someone better unless grow some fucking balls.

I'm thinking about it and all my responses ('shes not like this, what we have is special') just sound so cliché.
How can I find out what actually happens? I need to know guys.

Women will cheat on you, including with a junkie. If anything, she probably finds it attractive.

What the fuck, how am I supposed to protect her from her own ideas when I'm not even there? This is just ridiculous.
:Oh yeah I'll break up with my bf because I did something stupid when wasn't there and he didn't magically stop me:

Nigga just tell her no. If she wants to meet with him she can go to a restaurant.

You could tell her to at least see him in public where he's not a fucking danger to your belongings and to her, or you're done with her.
This means setting boundaries. You only say "oh no, don't do that, i don't like it", well she can do what she wants.
But you wouldn't ever go so far because you 'have something special' and 'you trust her' and 'she wouldn't do something stupid' and 'you couldn't lose her'.
The problem is she is clearly doing something you absolutely NOT want and you are still clingy as fuck. You have no self respect and she can smell it, that's why she does it. she is acting like the girl you don't want and you STILL want her. she knows and now wants confirmation that you are nothing special, and by this action she just proved herself right.

>Why is my husband cheating on me? I have a job, I'm a responsible woman. Why is my husband having sex with a dirty whore in the slumps?
dude you being better than that junkie literally doesn't matter

>legitimately believe her that she wants to help him

So what do they need you for?

dude, sluts will cheat on their perfect, billionare boyfriend because if they can. They get bored, or they know they have the emotional advantage, which is what you should never give to a woman, or she'll cheat on you. The moment she knows you care more than her, its game over, respect lost.

This is all so fucked up...
I was thinking about fucking proposing to her, we seemed to fit together so perfectly.
Hell, she showed me multiple times how happy she was and how she would never want to lose me.
I just do not get why she so suddenly, and for this specific purpose, choses to ignore my opinion.

OP you are missing the fucking point entirely.
>is she cheating or not?
NOT THE POINT.
>she is not respectful of your boundaries and what makes you uncomfortable. she is a cunt who knows you have no real boundaries. you are a pre-cuck, regardless of whether she is already cheating
this is the point, your relationship is unhealthy

So she just tried to call me, then texted that he already left. Apparently they really had just dinner.
I will still make it a point to show her that this will have consequences.
Apparently she doesn't care what I want or don't want, even if I clearly tell her. So the next time she tries to pull something like this, she can find a flat of her own to invite the guy to.

Yes I know. If words don't work, I will draw a line for the future.

because its your "opinion". not a clear, negotiated, discussed and agreed upon boundary. you gave her a weak ass suggestion, which she is ignoring because its not serious.
jesus OP, I am starting to hate you a little bit too, and now I'm looking around for a junkie to fuck just like your GF.
the fact that youre back here again, in the same situation tells us everything we need to know.
you're weak and dont respect yourself
she doesnt respect you either
all this Jow Forums wont help you because you wont listen

thats what you said last time, faggot
>im glad he (nutted/ stashed his drugs/ stole some shit/ raped her) quickly so she had more time to clean up

Well what the fuck am I supposed to do?
Last time I told her how I feel, like an adult, and I had the impression that she got it. Obviously I was wrong.
What I learn from all this is that words don't seem to work, so I will employ threats from now on. Or do you have a better solution?

I'm literally in the same exact position as you. I am trying to be a famous rapper. I am still young but the town I live in is too damn small to get anywhere. I want to move but all of my family lives here and I am too afraid to move. my anxiety i guess. just keep your head up and keep reading statistics of how rich people got rich at a late age and try to pretend that it'll happen to you. with love.

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>he's finally stopped drinking the kool-aid
Only took ya two whole threads and about two weeks. G'jaaaaaaab.

You tell her you made it clear where you stood on this and she violated your trust; not only this, but she ensured it would be during a time where she could evade repercussion. Not when you're there in town but when you're gone, and now she's telling you it's all innocent. Even though she will only have him about when you're long and gone.

It's time to tell her she's on strike two, if you want to be merciful about it. One more slip-up...
But that's the problem OP, you're just gonna let her know where limits are and where she has to stop or start to keep your eyes turned the other way. Anything at this point is basically falling on deaf ears.
Shit, maybe just break it off. Or ask her what the fuck she's thinking and why she's getting her shit tied up with a druggie. Or why she's gotta drag your home into it.

Fuck, the more I think and discuss this the more I just wanna tell her myself to pack her shit and fuck off on the junkie jet. By not being livid the first time you've just set a precedent of her getting away with it.

I'd call her and blow up, tell her to get her shit and her junkie ex the fuck out of the house and carry her ass to the crackhouse with him. No means no, where are your balls man? This isn't even about the possibility of her cheating on you or doing drugs, it's blantant disrespect you shouldn't have any tolerance for.

Hahaha your threats, why would she listen to those either?
I know you aren't going to do anything, you know you aren't going to do anything, and she knows you're not going to do anything.

Oh I fucking will make sure to tell her she's on strike two.
And if there's a next time, her ass is out on the street.

There will be. Honestly, this might just be the tip of the iceberg with her disrespect. And what now, you'll never leave again? You'll leave and ~hope~ she stays faithful to your trust this time? Fuck man, she ran over it twice. Why wouldn't she do it a third? Third time's a charm, even.

I think the problem here is that hindsight is 20/20 and you're kinda beyond the point of repair now.

Next time, she won't tell OP because he "just freaks out" and "she's not doing anything wrong".

Do you have a better solution?
I do not want to break up with her. Do you think there's any realistic way to restore respect?

I dunno m8
Lose your shit and put the fear of God into her?
I get the sense you aren't even fucking angry

Of course I am, my head is fucking crawling with ants, but Im also just fucking exhausted after working 12 hours and I just want this shit to go back to the way it was

The easy thing and the right thing are often not the same thing.
I'm not saying hit a bitch or leave her tonight, but bro if you can't muster up enough to bring the hammer down, I don't know what to tell ya

I don't have the energy right now to call her.
The hammer will come down when I get home. Until then I guess I will give her the cold shoulder

God speed OP but FFS do not puss out again cuz this shit is ridiculous

Keep us updated OP
For what it's worth I think your GF means well and the ex is the one to be worried about. Some women are just so fucking oblivious and think it's completely platonic while the guy worms his way in. He is probably the one scheduling it so you're away because "you make him uncomfortable" or some shit.
I'd tell her to fuck him off or I'm leaving. There are very few reasons to remain friends with an ex and if they are a junkie then they should have no place in her life.
And sorry to probably make you really paranoid, but I had an ex gf who reconnected with her ex and he wormed his way in and manipulated her and the moment things were rough between me and the gf he made his move and she cheated in me with him. I should have told her that if she wants him in her life then she can't have me, and you should tell that to your gf now

Hows your sex life OP?

Cuck

His girlfriend loves it when he eats junkie cum out of her ass

Addicts are manipulators the old friend of hers isn't an imbecile he isn't out to get rehabilitated. He perceive your home as luxury, some sort of prize over the slumps where he used to frequent and stay. You need to keep your girl in check next time around and tell her, he is a liability because of the potential dangers he can cause. What happens when he run out of money to provide for his fix? He is going to beg her for money and if the answer is "no", he will steal from her. There goes whatever financial needs you saved up down the drain over a fucktard junkie. How will she react if he is strung out and make a move on her and when she declines he goes apeshit? Physical violence and in handcuffs. I hate to say it but you need to propagandize the situation for all its worth. Get that fiend out while you can, fuck em dead.

You have no way of knowing if he left or not or even what they did while he was there.

Or seems to me like she doesn't take the relationship ad seriously as you do.

By the way, you don't even know this guy is a junkie. That's just what she's telling you. Don't embarrass yourself or your father any longer, have some dignity.

Shut up pussy. Your thinking about "w-well what can I do? I'm not even there! "And you didn't even try.

Goodness, you are such a punk little pansy. You literally condone it but want to give US shit for trying to help you out cause you're too scared to help yourself out. You're a joke of a man, just throw on a skirt and go full trap you nasty faggot.

We kind of told you last time would be a one thing only.
Remember leaving work early in panic?
You clearly told her not to, I say tell her you love her but if she ever does anything like this again you'll leave her

This

Kek

It was clear last time OP was an idiot and he's confirmed it here

Cheating never makes sense OP

>She would probably lose all respect for herself if she did.
Women have no selfrespect and you're getting cucked mate, they are banging behind your back.

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There is no further direction other than the two choices..

1. Junkieshitstain is not a part of your life now

2. We are done.

You know that this does not get better. In fact option 1 will force her resentful underground. So guess what is left.?

I remember you from the last thread.
If you have explicitely told her you're not cool with it last time than what she's doing right now is spitting in your face.
Cheating or not, she puts him over you and your relationship by doing this, and that's inexcusable.
Also, like an earlier user said, it IS awfully convenient how these things come about specifically when you are away.

She's either hopelessly naive or sizing him up for cheating, he sure as shit is sizing her up.
Put your foot down or prepare for 'i'm leaving you because I fell for druggo, completely spontaneously, and i'll pretend it's okay because you've been abusive and possessive in retrospect'.
Grow a spine,man, come on, she's definitely not in the right here, anyone with half a brain could tell you that.

He's sleeping in your bed.
He's eating your food out of your fridge.
He's using your TV.
He's shitting into your toilet.
And he's going balls deep in your gf's wet pussy.
All that without your consent.

What the fuck do you think you should do?

>woman does something stupid
>"it be da mans fault"
Based and retardpilled.

Bumping for updates. You out there OP?

>She's either hopelessly naive
She is not naive and playing OP like a fiddle

I agree with you. And while I don't like giving her an ultimatum like this, I see now that I have no other choice.

Really good, I would say.

Yes that's what it will come down to.

I've known her for some years now and she would be a master actor if she turned out to coldly lie now. My trust is cracked, yes, but I'm pretty sure she wouldn't lie about him being a junkie, or call me while he is still around or something like this.
I also believe she did not cheat, but the whole thing is unacceptable regardless.
Having slept over it and had some time to think, I have decided to call her tonight and let her know that she is on strike two. And when I get home I will reinforce my decision. If she so much as talks to him one more time, thats it.

Good! I'm invested in your story now so let us know how it unfolds
>If she so much as talks to him one more time, thats it.
Mm, I wouldn't actually point it out quite as strongly, it would put her on the defensive on principle because she's going to feel attacked, most people who aren't complete doormats by character would do this.
If I were in your place I wouldn't oppose them keeping contact (especially if we assume she's trustworthy and not cheating, but we only have your word on it), but strongly and decisively opposed to them hanging out alone in your house while you're away.
Suggest him coming over when you're around, UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE can he come over when you're away.
This whole "hanging out while your away" thing was too much the first time and it's FAR too much the second time, she is undoubtedly avoiding you when planning to hang out with him.
If I were you I'd ask her for clarification on the matter, "why are you inviting him over specifically when I'm away? what's with me promising not to come home too early?"
The fact she even those this makes me feel she understands the problem with what she's doing, but she's still trying to play it in such a way where she eats the cake and leaves it whole.
I'm curious about how she rationalizes it, either to you or in her mind.