Be me

Telling girls you want a relationship dries up their pussies so quick you'll be amazed.
It signals desperation.

>I would say about 5-15% of the profiles will explicitly mention they're not looking for a hookup, and want something more
I know, it's pretty sad.

Though do note that some of these do it as a filter, thinking it improves the quality of their matches by making them seem less like cock hungry sluts.

Unironically this, and I don't even sleep around.

The thing is, when you tell a girl "I want a relationship", you are telling them that you feel worthless by yourself. No one wants to date someone who is worthless, and if you need a relationship to be a proper individual, you are never a proper individual.

You date to meet people, and find someone fitting to you. If you date to find a relationship, you make it sound like you don't care about who you find, and it's the worst kind of desperation possible. I would actually be more okay with a guy saying he was horny and needed sex, than a guy saying he was in need of a relationship.

>5-15% of men are lying about what they want
Your point?

OP is a guy.

I don't know what men do on Tinder. But about 5-15% of the WOMEN on there will directly claim to want something serious.

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>The thing is, when you tell a girl "I want a relationship", you are telling them that you feel worthless by yourself

what the fuck is this shit. Is this real?

Can any woman confirm this? What the fuck do i tell her then? I want to fuck nothing else bitch? Is this really how does this work?

gunning for something serious from the get-go can at least give off the impression of neediness

So what? Yea i need her? And? I thought women wanted to feel wanted and not like whores just to cum and dump.

I almost never care what a females bio says. I have hooked up with a few girls that said no hookups or fuck buddys in their bio. Lol.

they usually want to feel desired, but not clinged onto. to feel dedicated, but not have a responsibility. in a way, they do want to feel wanted, but not TOO wanted, if that makes sense. a lot of the problems with these is that it comes down to the nuances of the relationship -- the subtleties. if you give too much, even slightly, you screw up the relationship. if you give too little, again even if slight, you still screw it up. you're initially expected to somehow hit that small middle ground to make it work. a skill that seems rather uncommon, in my experience.

at this point it looks like its easier just rape every single woman.

I am a woman.

>What the fuck do i tell her then? I want to fuck nothing else bitch? Is this really how does this work?
Are you autistic or something? You tell her you are interested in getting to know her. You know, socialize and broaden your social circle.

If you directly jump to sex, you will only have success with thots out for a ONS. If you ask for relationships, you'll only get the most desperate and needy girls available, most of whom are ugly and psychotic.

A normal woman will ignore guys who are broadcasting that they want a relationship. You don't share this until you have gotten to know her more. If you say this in your profile, you are basically saying "someone just marry me, I don't care who".

>I thought women wanted
You don't feel wanted, when it feels like you just want a relationship, but doesn't care who you choose. And that's the impression you give off when you say you are looking for a relationship. It's like someone going into a store, asking for toothpaste. Doesn't matter what brand, just need a toothpaste of some kind.

No one wants to be that person.

>You tell her you are interested in getting to know her.
Being direct and honest with your intentions doesn't go over well with women half the time. It comes off too strong.

Well. That sound logical for a woman. I can take it.

They always do to not seem like a thot. Or maybe they really do, but aren't the kind you want to keep around.

Nah, it's not that complex.

Just show ordinary interest. It's fine to even schedule back to back dates, even. Showing interest is great, but it matters how you show it. If you instantly come off as wanting a relationship, just for the sake of having it, you'll have no success.

If you take a realistic approach, and get to know the person, and build on it the more you get to know her, and the more you (hopefully) start to like her, you'll be fine. It's not a skill, it's just letting it develop naturally, and not try to force it because you only want to mark off "relationship" on your to-do list.

>Being direct and honest with your intentions doesn't go over well with women half the time. It comes off too strong.
This isn't coming off strong. Being direct and honest about wanting to get to know someone first, is exactly what people want, because it means that once you do start being interested, it seems genuine.

No one is genuinely interested before the first date. That's the problem. So when you "come off as direct" during the first date where you proclaim your undying love, you aren't coming off too strong. You come off as desperate and childish, or worse, like you treat the whole thing as a joke.

Haha, i am so happy to not have this problem.

You need to first get matched in order to get unmatched..

For real though, OP you fucked up any further chances by hooking up with him, hell even meeting with him at his signals way too much. You were already discarded from gf material when you hooked up or long before..

If expressing interest in someone comes off as "coming off too strong," then that reflects poorly on the other person, not you. If they leave after that, then they really weren't worth your time.

>Being direct and honest with your intentions doesn't go over well with women half the time.
This is true if your intention is sex.

If your intention is "I want to know more about you before I decide on anything", it's usually fine, and if it isn't, she was only looking for a quick Hook up.

If your intention is to get a relationship, and you state it before even knowing anything substantial about the person, you seem like an autistic idiot.

>Nah, it's not that complex.
Nothing about that was complex.

>Just show ordinary interest.
Doesn't really get you anywhere. In fact, showing interest alone can be creepy and register as sexual impropriety if she turns out to be not as privy towards it.

>It's fine to even schedule back to back dates, even.
Those kinds of dates have gradually decreased in popularity since the tech boom. Most of my colleagues are married, and they don't do that. :/

>Showing interest is great
Showing interest rarely goes anywhere. You'll be lucky if they connect the dots or notice it. And sometimes when they do, it's easy for them to be uncomfortable.

>If you instantly come off as wanting a relationship
Which a usual sign of interest.

>just for the sake of having it
A lot of today's dating, especially among young people, seem to be for the sake of it.

>you'll have no success
It depends if they're receptive to you. If not, showing interest not only results in nothing, but it can easily have worse results.

>If you take a realistic approach
None of what's being described here is realistic. :/

>and get to know the person
Often doesn't go anywhere, even with other relationships like friends or family. Not to mention, that's a really creepy approach to take, whether we're talking romantic or just in general. As well it's a deeply disrespectful thing to do around people you haven't already got to know. There's very places outside of the US where that behaviour flies. And even over there, it doesn't always go down well.

>and build on it the more you get to know her
Again, creepy and forced.

>and the more you (hopefully) start to like her, you'll be fine.
Why would you pursue a romance if you don't already like them?

>It's not a skill
Sociability of any kind is a general skill.

>it's just letting it develop naturally
It's letting virtual nothingness happen.

>and not try to force it
A lot of the approaches thus far are pretty forced. :/

>This isn't coming off strong.
Yes it is, since you don't really know this people well enough, and are putting unreasonable wants and expectations onto them.

>Being direct and honest about wanting to get to know someone first
Is really creepy and coming on too strong.

>is exactly what people want
Not the least bit true.

>because it means that once you do start being interested, it seems genuine
That's even creepier.

>No one is genuinely interested before the first date.
I have never been, nor seen, any dates like that.

>So when you "come off as direct" during the first date where you proclaim your undying love, you aren't coming off too strong.
>claims not to be coming on too strong just after giving a blatant example of being too forward and forceful

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boys dont listen to whores in this thread. They are making something simple into ultra complex challenge. They are absolutely clueless about shit because they are sucking off random whos for burgers.

The advice "just bee urself xD" is just for chads who are agressive. If you have no muslces you dont have confidence. The bitches love being approached by ultra violent chads. What does chad even mean? It's just guy who doesnt give a fuck. So be that guy dont give a shit what females think and just take her. All that "hurrr creep xD" is just bullshit they made up in their retarded low iq brains. Getting pussy for misygonist like myself is easiest shit. Ill give you exact guide how to do it but just please forget everything in this thread. It's all BULL fucking SHIT!

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They might've been worth your time, but were just slow birds and easy to scare off. Especially considering that modern women are on the more shy/introverted side. And women in general are easy to scare off, because shit like sexual harassment is still rampant.

And if your intention might be a relationship. Because you want to be easy on them and let them naturally develop a comfort around you. Kind of like how cats will gradually develop a trust in you over time. Being direct and honest about your intention, sadly, has a bad habit of sending mixed signals and giving off the wrong message; even if you stated it the best you can. You kind have to slowly reveal that over time, when (presumably) your relationship is also developing.

>Doesn't really get you anywhere. In fact, showing interest alone can be creepy and register as sexual impropriety if she turns out to be not as privy towards it.
Not if you are going on a date.
>>It's fine to even schedule back to back dates, even.
>Those kinds of dates have gradually decreased in popularity since the tech boom. Most of my colleagues are married, and they don't do that. :/
Obviously, you don't have to do dates like that when married.
>Showing interest rarely goes anywhere. You'll be lucky if they connect the dots or notice it.
Then you aren't showing interest.
>>If you instantly come off as wanting a relationship
>Which a usual sign of interest.
No it's not. It's an interest in having a relationship, not in the person.
>A lot of today's dating, especially among young people, seem to be for the sake of it.
Which is a huge turnoff.
>It depends if they're receptive to you.
Obviously, but if the other part is visibly uninterested in you, then you kinda lost by default.
>None of what's being described here is realistic. :/
That's because you are too autistic to realize how normal people develop relations in general.
>Often doesn't go anywhere, even with other relationships like friends or family. Not to mention, that's a really creepy approach to take, whether we're talking romantic or just in general. As well it's a deeply disrespectful thing to do around people you haven't already got to know. There's very places outside of the US where that behaviour flies. And even over there, it doesn't always go down well.
What fucking world do you live in where talking casually to people is disrespectful?

>Again, creepy and forced.
>Why would you pursue a romance if you don't already like them?
You cannot possibly know if you love someone before you get to know them.

>Yes it is, since you don't really know this people well enough, and are putting unreasonable wants and expectations onto them.
>"I just want to get to know you a bit first" is coming in too strong because you dont know the person well enough
Are you retarded?

You guys actually think ordinary socializing, casual chatting, and small talk is creepy? For real?

I knew Jow Forums was bad, but Holy shit you guys are super autistic. Get out more, please. You'll quickly see how ordinary human beings interact with each other.

God damnit guys...
>ITT: people who think talking to others is inherently creepy, even with friends and family
Just see a psychiatrist everybody. You people seriously need it.

>>he's cute
This happened.

>Not if you are going on a date.
It's an easy and surefire way for that date to go sour if you show your hand too much.

>Obviously, you don't have to do dates like that when married.
They weren't doing dates like that before marriage. :|

>Then you aren't showing interest.
Yes you are. Not everyone's going to pick up on all your social cues, and there's an easy point where trying to show interest violates either party's boundaries.

>No it's not. It's an interest in having a relationship, not in the person.
Those are not mutually exclusive.

>Which is a huge turnoff.
Well then by that logic, ordinary human behaviour is a turn off.

>Obviously, but if the other part is visibly uninterested in you, then you kinda lost by default.
Most of the time, those kinds of interest are not visible enough to discern.

>That's because you are too autistic to realize how normal people develop relations in general.
This is how normal relationships develop.

>What fucking world do you live in where talking casually to people is disrespectful?
The rest of the world.

>You cannot possibly know if you love someone before you get to know them.
You would know whether or not you want them. Otherwise you would have no motivation in even interacting with them.

>You guys actually think ordinary socializing, casual chatting, and small talk is creepy?
It is if the other person finds it creepy.

>Get out more, please. You'll quickly see how ordinary human beings interact with each other.
The irony.

i've been working as a title ix coordinator at my university, and most sexual misconduct reports I have take in and process are usually little things like causal chatting or small talk that one party felt uncomfortable enough to report. :(

Yeah, America is one of the few places I see people getting chummy with everyone in arm's reach. Even here in Europe, that's considered weird and up to no good. Since they prefer to be reserved and only in the company of those they already know.

>Yeah, America is one of the few places I see people getting chummy with everyone in arm's reach. Even here in Europe, that's considered weird and up to no good. Since they prefer to be reserved and only in the company of those they already know.
Depends ENTIRELY on where in Europe you are.

In my culture you are basically labelled autistic if you don't *at least* hug, preferably you accept the cheek kisses and return them.

America is likely the biggest shithole in terms of the fear of contact and regular chatting.

Someone apparently missed that this thread is about planned meetings between two people... If you accept meeting up privately with someone, and small talk is considered creepy, you are doing small talk wrong.

hurrrr creep xD

>Depends ENTIRELY on where in Europe you are.
Most of it? I can only think of a few cultures that like being buddy-buddy with everyone, and the States are still the biggest example.
>In my culture you are basically labelled autistic if you don't *at least* hug, preferably you accept the cheek kisses and return them.
Sounds roughly like the US. Most places I've been to, that's a really weird thing to do.
>America is likely the biggest shithole in terms of the fear of contact and regular chatting.
Americans are often the biggest extroverts on the planet.

Someone has never heard of the #metoo shit that is destroying the US recently.

in order for something to be creepy, it first has to creep them out. at the very least, induce some kind of discomfort. which can be just as easily triggered by the other person's shyness and anxiety. in fact, that seems to be a reoccurring thing in these reports. someone tries to come out of their shell and socialize more, but their anxiety ends up making everyone else uncomfortable.

I think #MeToo is just them waking up to why other cultures don't like getting close to random strangers.

So you now finally understand that this is not an issue for normal people going on preplanned dates?

preplanned dates go wrong all the time. and it's mostly normal people who commit some kind of sexual misconduct -- whether intentionally or not.

Not to the point of sexual misconduct charges.

a). preplanned dates have ended in abuse and rape. b). sexual misconduct crimes are among the hardest to prove and prosecute. many people guilty of committing straight up rape still get away with it.

>a). preplanned dates have ended in abuse and rape.
That never happens on accident.
>b). sexual misconduct crimes are among the hardest to prove and prosecute. many people guilty of committing straight up rape still get away with it
Even less reason to be afraid of it.

Stop being autistic.

This is reality, unfortunately, but also why both men and women are staying single and unhappy and having broken and non-existent families. It’s total social degeneracy, but nothing will change with this generation. It’s like how real boomers are so stupid with their liberal politics and are making us all poor. The widespread use of the internet has made nonsensical and unrealistic expectations “normal”.

it happens roughly 20% of the time with women, especially college-aged women. which acts as even more a reason they'll take the slightest discrepancy with a lot of skepticism and concern for their safety. which often makes it more likely that a simple conversation can unintentionally go into sexual misconduct territory with the slightest heel. it's nice knowing that the fact women are usually at a high risk for sexual assault is somehow less of a reason to be afraid of it. -_-

stop being a myopic dipshit.

If you wanted to see hil again dont fuck him on the first date.
Not even on the second.
Make him wait until it s clear you two are in a relationship.
If he dumps you before he wasnt interested in something serious.
Man are not hard to understand not like psycho women (see this thread)

God I hate this buzzword, but your ablism is so fucking cringey.

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What fucking discussion have you been following you turboretard?

This is about a guy asking how to get lucky using tinder or other dating apps. He has nothing to be afraid of about this, unless he purposely rapes a woman.

Holy shit, this is unreal levels of stupidity. I don't even know why I tried to explain the thread to you, because you are clearly too much of a drooling retard to grasp even basic concepts

>ablism
I don't think you know what that word means, user.

Fucked him too fast.

>He has nothing to be afraid of about this, unless he purposely rapes a woman.
most reports I've had to processes, which have ended in suspensions before, were just for small things like trying to start a conversation. it doesn't matter what the intent is, sexual misconduct is not and has never been based on intent, but if the other person views it as misconduct/harassment; nothing else. even something like small talk, a my line of work has repeatedly shown, can qualify as sexual misconduct. and the fact women, especially college-aged women, are utterly aware of how high the risk of sexual assault is towards, is the main reason why they view roughly any attempts at interacting with them with skepticism.

>This is about a guy asking how to get lucky using tinder or other dating apps.
it's still sexual harassment, wherever you go.

>Holy shit, this is unreal levels of stupidity. I don't even know why I tried to explain the thread to you, because you are clearly too much of a drooling retard to grasp even basic concepts
it's because the shit you're spewing is completely, emphatically wrong.

You clearly don't yourself.

>it's still sexual harassment, wherever you go.
No it's not. If you go on a date and report someone for flirting, you'll be laughed at.

Your high school experience isn't how the real world works.

>If you go on a date and report someone for flirting, you'll be laughed at.
i'm obliged by my job not to laugh at them. and i find these reports more depressing than funny.

>Your high school experience isn't how the real world works.
projection.

By that logic, if you have consent to sex at first, but withdrew during the middle of it, the fact you consented in the first place means it doesn't count as rape.

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This is why we get such garbage advice here, because every time someone asks for normie advice, and actually gets it, the thread is instantly swarmed by angry, butthurt autists.

You people are the reason we have Lawliet, Hitler and Peanut. Remember that every time you see them shitpost.

Obviously, because if you could do it like that, no one would ever have sex, because it's literally free money. Just have sex, claim you withdrew during sex, and voila, instant rape case you auto-win.

You guys need to see the real world once in a while.

>You guys need to see the real world once in a while.
You very clearly don't live in it.

>Obviously, because if you could do it like that, no one would ever have sex, because it's literally free money. Just have sex, claim you withdrew during sex, and voila, instant rape case you auto-win.
this generally doesn't happen.
>You guys need to see the real world once in a while.
irony.

>thinks this is how it actually works
Incels, everybody.