27+ Thread

I live in a ghetto, the shelters here are packed. I went to one before and was turned away, tried another and someone robbed me.
If I'm going anywhere it's to Forrest Gump myself across the country somewhere. Or more than likely die in the process, I have a lot of health issues.

Can you give me more information?

Honestly, that works. If you can viably claim that your life and health are at risk, most shelters will at least contact people to look into it. Once your claims are verified, you'll be considered a priority case, especially if you have health issues.

Forest gump went to the army.

I meant after that, when he just takes off running.

clinicaltrials.gov

There are many kinds of trials for different lengths and different requirements and thus different pay. They have different centers around the country. If you aren't from US search with your country to find the website. You having health issues means you search by those, whereas I could do the healthy ones. Even then there are specific requirements.

guyhealyjapan.com

I did this program years ago. I was one of the first to do their study abroad programs they just started at the time. Everyone is really kind and helpful. If you are like me and are poor, you can get work while you are there with help. They teach Japanese too. If not do a trial first to make cash and apply now.

workaway.info

I used this site among others to find exchanges. People offer accommodation and food if you help do work. Hosts vary a lot.

As always I promise you that even with a plan sometimes your pasts makes looking up difficult and life doesn't always go as planned. I suffered a lot before, through, and even after spending my younger years like this. But I'm okay these days, things are looking up, I matured and have a unique biography worthy life story, and I'm just 27. At 26 you are still very young.

Thank you for the help, I will look into the 1st & 3rd links, I don't think the 2nd idea is viable.

29 wageslave.

Convince me not to become a furry to get friends and get laid (even if it's only gay sex).

How do I feel love/infatuation again? It's been so long since I've felt something about a girl. I just feel nothing now. I want that feeling of butterflies in my stomach.

30m, autist

should i ask a 25f ex-coworker who posts nothing but Jow Forums on her instagram for advice on helping my gf (also 30) lose weight or is this just a Bad Idea

I miss having the problems of an < 26 y/o college student. My insurance was covered and I had an easy life with no problems.

Somehow it all went to shit after I got my first job.

Just let me go back to 2000.

29, married. Have to pay fucking taxes instead of getting a refund these days because apparently we make too much money now.

Enjoy your rich people problems

The other day I was in the shower and out of nowhere I thought of all the people who were like user ONE DAY YOU'LL LOOK BACK ON HIGH SCHOOL ONE DAY AND WISH YOU WERE BACK HERE

and really high school was fuckin trash I had no real friends and I was ugly and awkward and picked on all the time but actually yes I would love to wake up and be 16 again and have absolutely no responsibilities at all, and also have a full head of hair

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I'll let you know when I encounter them.

Just about to start a proper adult job after finishing my master's degree. It pays well and it's gonna take up alot of time. I'm happy about it (if a bit nervous about fucking it up somehow) but one thing is nagging at me.

I've basically had 6 months between finishing my education and getting this job. Besides the little bit of work I did on the side while I was job searching, I've basically done nothing at all. I used to make lots of time for fairly constructive hobbies (making music, reading lots, getting to the pool a few times a week) but I feel like all my interest and passion in those things has disappeared and been replaced with really empty, passive media consumption and a general feeling of disinterest/lethargy.

I'm worried that a vacuum has been created somewhere which is just going to be filled up by work and I'm gonna wake up in 15 years without any love for anything.

Is there just something about transitional periods that take the life out of you, or do I have a bigger problem than that?

It's at the point where I literally don't know what to do to fill my days anymore.

With taxes you buy civilization

>28 khv
>lose it to girl from work last May
>girl younger than me, smart with money, paid off loans, good job, nurturing and a good aunt, wants kids
>can't really return her love due to never experiencing it so long in life
>can't get past her having four previous partners

Not sure what to do. It physically hurts me when she says she loves me and isn't going to let me go. I don't want to waste any of her time. Shes been a good girl and pretty much held my hand like a child through how to have a relationship and be an adult through some pathetic displays. But I'm still not happy and feel insecuriry over her having previous partners. But if I end it I'll just keep living with my overbearing mom and dad like manchild until I die. Also I feel like she's such a good girl that I need to rush into a decision about if I'm going to marry her so she still has time to find a good life partner before she gets old.

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>four previous partners
man what are you talking about she's right in the golidlocks zone of having the right amount of ex boyfriends.

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27 here.

I made a thread about a little problem I am having with my mom so I would appreciate if anyone has any advice about it.

Here's the thread

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As I move further away from my parents, the time between each visit grows, and I can now legitimately see them aging. Very close with both of them - they are both twice-divorced and it's difficult to think back to a time I actually felt like I was spending 'enough' time with either.

How do I come to terms with the fact that pursuing my dreams of a minimal lifestyle out in the mountains means they will be entering old age even more quickly, from my perspective?

Is my attitude of not giving any fucks about any personal connections except for my woman, dog, and parents leading me down a path to self-induced misery? Is cultivating meaningful friendships with my peers the only way to lessen the weight on my shoulders of being the only child to two aging multi-divorcees?

Fuck.

Your mileage may vary, but for me, the fewer obligations I have the less I make of the time available. As you put it, transitional periods have been some of my least enjoyable stretches of time. There's no pressure to stick to a schedule or to prioritize your hobbies, so procrastination comes with zero repercussoins.

That said, it sounds like you could use some discipline as far as hobbies go. Make a schedule that fits in tightly with your work, and do something you enjoy and isn't a completely passive activity for an hour a day. Even if you feel worn the fuck out from life.

Any sane parent would love to see their kid go out into the world and make a life for themselves, they don't want them hanging around the house pretending that it's still 1998.

Helps to hear someone say that out loud. Than yous.

For the record, I live three hours from my hometown and am independent in every way other than this shadow of guilt hanging over my head. It descends with a vengeance some days and it's hard to process as most of my friends really aren't that close with their folks.

3 hours is not bad
you can easily visit several times a year and spend a weekend with them

Obviously not enough civilization to fix the potholes in my town.

Not the first replier but I would just add that you should be as honest with yourself as you can be. Are you pursuing a simpler life, closer to nature etc. because it brings you peace and (near)daily, visceral joy? Or are you acting out some kind of ideal or fantasy which you feel like you should pursue?

If you have good parents, they'll just want you to be happy. As the other user said, you're not that far away and you can still be a presence in their lives through effort and a bit technology.

It's a natural part of life to watch parents decline. It's not easy but its the default of life and better than the alternative. You don't have to like it but don't set yourself down a compromise path you don't really want to take to try to feel better about it. Being someone's child automatically places you in a selfish position. It's a debt you repay (eventually) to your kids, not to them.

>I don't want to waste any of her time.
Being by your side is a right.
>But I'm still not happy and feel insecuriry over her having previous partners.
She had four other partners who according to your brain are better than you, yet she choose you. That tells me you are doing better than them right now.
>Also I feel like she's such a good girl that I need to rush into a decision about if I'm going to marry her so she still has time to find a good life partner before she gets old.
Enjoy her and let her enjoy you. At some point, if it feel right, one of you will "click" and make things more serious.

Thanks user. I was kinda already thinking this. I think I rely too much on institutions and outside structure for discipline in my life.

Really makes me start to understand why there are people who dread retirement.

27 here(very close to 28). Just started a new job today. I'm going to have to adjust to the different hours and learn new shit. But man I think I made the right choice. I was working overnight and for 5 years. It only made me more antisocial. I have a lot of hope.

I'm just sad and very stressed right now.. I'm doing all the right things for my life at this moment. But my bf isn't and hasn't for over 3 years. He is an only child raised by overbearing parents. 30 years old and never done his taxes, never moved out of his parents' house till now, no job etc.
How can I do this life together when he's waiting for me to live his life for him? I'm getting really bitter and resentful.

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28 turning 29 this month. I'm anxious for the 3-0.

How much have you tried to push him up til now? On the one hand maybe he just has an inveterate, lazy personality and nothing you can do will help. If you think that's the case you should try to get out sooner rather than later. You have your own hills to climb and you need someone who can at least carry their own weight if not push you when you need it.
On the other hand, it’s possible he just needs some direction and encouragement. As someone with overbearing parents, I can tell you that it’s hard to unlearn the habit of looking to other people for everything. It can be hard to even think of concrete steps to improve matters. Also, there could be some serious self-esteem issues. Do you guys have a realistic(ish), shared vision you’re working towards? Try to get him excited about the prospect of building something good together lifestyle-wise. Slot things like his attaining employment into that process of planmaking and try to help him feel some authorship in your shared life rather than just aimlessly nagging and feeling resentful.

Leave him. If he didn't figure it out now he isn't going to.

You've wasted enough time with this guy due to your own insecurities of not being able to find anyone else and not wanting to be alone and it's never going to get better. Hopefully you're not too old and can still find a responsible adult male looking to build a family and a future together. Either way the sooner you cut your losses the sooner you can work towards something better.

27 and lost. I'm an only child and live with my parents. Trying to find a job, but I feel it's impossible to escape/grow up. I have a degree but it's basically useless I guess. I have practically zero social life and I suffer with OCD, social anxiety and depression. The thought of ever just being able to live on my own seems impossible let alone finding a woman etc.

>I was working overnight and for 5 years.
How could you stand it? I did it for 3 months before it I couldn't take it anymore because all attempts at self-improvement conflicted with night-shift work.

discord gg/F3H2M

A 30+ discord, if anyone's interested. Not too populated at the moment but it'll be nice to have a server with people in the same age range as us.

>A 30+ discord
> Not too populated at the moment

Probably because most people who are over 30 either have no idea what Discord is, or know full well what it is and avoid it like the plague.

It's a nice gesture though at least.

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You guys don't need a Discord hugbox, you need results you've earned yourself.

I thought maybe, on the off chance, if some of us are nearby, we could meet up.

remember in the 90s when the internet was getting big and they had all these VHS tapes and even PSAs on TV that were just like WE LIKE TO HAVE FUN ON THE WORLD WIDE WEB INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY BUT DO NOT EVER MEET SOMEONE THROUGH THE INTERNET UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES

that's especially true when it comes to Jow Forums. if you want to meet people just go to a thing outside. I've met people from Jow Forums, or rather I met them randomly through school or work or something and then they were like "hey have you heard of Jow Forums?" and it was like yeah obviously you're anonymous.

>that's especially true when it comes to Jow Forums.
Pfffft. If there is one thing I regret in my life, just one thing, it's never going to the meetups that used to happen across different boards, back when geekdom was just dorks. Those photos of old meetups were cringy but comfy as fuck and I wish I had the balls to go to one.

>if you want to meet people just go to a thing outside
I am terrified of trying to make friends at this age.

bump

just turned 30 in january mates... feels literally the same though. just maybe, an ounce less partying really, most of my 20s friends are married or have kids now..

really though, things are pretty rad after a full decade of aimless floating. finally starting to build some savings, finally have a career job in IT that pays well, dating a smoking hot 22 year old, got my car paid off.

20s suck ass, though it's definitely worth it to slog right on through. I feel like they're kinda designed to fuck around and figure out all the stupid shit and smart shit you can do, so that through your 30s you start to weed out the stupid shit progressively.

anyways, that's where i'm at. hoping all the best for yall!

I've been to a few meetups for Jow Forums and some other popular websites with an overlapping userbase (tumblr, reddit, etc.)

The only weird one was the reddit meetup where an obese racist guy kept making jokes about "Jew magic" and islamic terror attacks.

Of course now that I think about it I met a guy on Jow Forums who I later ran into at a party. The next few times I saw him around he talked non stop about how he was trying to kill himself by overdosing on homemade drugs, but he said he wanted to get really high on them first.

.

.

I got married.

I never thought it would happen, bult here I am. Yes, life is better. I used ti be a suicidal mentally ill nerd incapable of normal human interactions. I'm still mentally ill, but it is manageable now and I have a wife who understands. It's still strange to think about.

Só I am actually going to talk to my mom about all this shit tonight when she comes home. I going to try to be direct as possible a propose a deadline for her to deal with all this shit.
If she doesn't then I am leaving the house and gonna rent whatever small condo I can find. I will probably waste less money like this anyways.

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She must be very passionate about her business. If only she had someone to help her with the business and warn her of scams and traps.

Even so though, if it really is that bad it might be best to either coerce her into giving it up or hold her hand while she sinks with her ship.

>If only she had someone to help her with the business and warn her of scams and traps.

I did all that, so did my father. In fact I spent a huge ass part of my teenage years helping her and her business. I had to to help her financially all the a lot of times and I have her all my savings twice to help her out.

Some times you got to know when to throw the towel user and my mom has been beyond that point for years.

There's only so much I can do for so long.

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How'd you do it?

My fwb wants me to go to a swingers club with him.
He said he can’t get in without a girl and so he wants to know if I will go with.

>I don’t really want to go but he keeps bringing it up.
What do?

Honestly, it was luck more than anything else. I went back to university and met her there. It was a good thing that I had been visiting a therapist religiously before that and so I was at my most stable when I met het. Even so, it was her who asked me out because I was too beta for that. Maintaining the relationship has been surprisingly easy despite my social retardation because my wife is great. Very direct and easygoing. I suspect it's because she's somewhat socially clumsy herself.

After 10+ years, the place should have passed the 'difficult years', and should be bringing in a ton of money. Or 100% failing. If she's somehow paying all her debts, either she really sucks at managing (I don't belive it, it's too much of a coincidence that she's JUST THIS CLOSE to being in the red but not in the actual red) or she's spending the money without you knowing about it.

>Some people can go up but are still looking down.

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>who would rather have me sleep in a part of the house with faulty heat & disallow me from owning a bed so I sleep on the floor
You mean you have a roof over your head and a place to sleep? Possibly food to eat and people to talk to yet you choose, voluntarily, to sleep on the floor?

If your credit score is OK, you can get personal/moving loans.

Do you mean bitter?

Say no. It's not like you're contractually obligated to the guy you're fucking to go everywhere he wants to go just because he says so. Just make up excuses until he gets the hint. And if he doesn't, rant about how selfish he is and then never talk to him again. Better fucks out there with less hassle.

Don't do it user, think about morals and all that

What if....
And work with me here but...
what if it's not ACTUALLY about the money to your mom? What if she's not being stubborn, and she's just incredibly upset about feeling alone in a venture that didn't pan out the way she thought? What if that was her dream? And you guys just told her to shut it down because she owes you money?

the reality here is she started a business and got 0 support from her family, until she reached out to them for help and got it *with strings attached*. I guess she didn't read the fine print of the loan you gave her, which states that you're not giving her help but buying her complicity when you want her to do something she doesn't want to do.

If anything your response would make me grit my teeth and double down even harder, just to prove you wrong.

Anybody has done LSD past younfagness?
I only did it then, and was thinking of doing it again now, with set and setting and all that.
Any experiences on late hallucinogen use?

Nothing has much meaning anymore. So I figured, why not.

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I'm 27. I have no real friends. I feel like I get halfway into a friendly conversation with someone and then it tapers off and we part ways, and they think I'm an okay guy but we never make that real connection. I have this impression that I catfish normies. It's like they realize that I'm not one of them about halfway into the conversation and it's all downhill from there. Aside from that of my members, the peak of human interaction, for me, are the couple of 40+ year old regulars at the local gym who smile and wave at me but also don't want to be my friend. We talked about the weather a few times and the conversation just died. I even initiated it and they seemed happy to be talking to me for a while, but it just petered out. I'm just not sure how to fix myself. Making friends was so fucking easy as a kid... all I had to do was play with bugs or talk about video games or just be legit excited about something--literally anything--and there were droves of other kids to bro up with. People offered me pot in fucking middle school. Now I can't even make a slightly above average acquaintance at the gym.

what's wrong with me and how do I fix myself?

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How to find a pretty gf?

I did shrooms for the first time over Christmas break. As an epileptic with PTSD, that was a fucking mistake. But I can share a summary here if you want.

I'm pretty sure all it did was confirm that I might also have schizophrenia. I dissociated hard and the voices were basically yelling at me. I kept pausing my own speech, waiting for them to finish so I could hear myself talk. People said I was speaking incoherently, like I could only get one or two words out before putting my finger up and looking to the side like I was waiting for something. The sound was unbearable. Not just voices but also some kind of pounding that kept reverberating off the walls behind my head.

I'm pretty confident that if I had done it when I was younger, it would've been a better experience. As it happens now, my sister does acid at 34 and she says that it definitely does feel different. Like her brain can't recover the way it used to, and the trips are darker. I think it's because when were this age we have more to stress about and theres more guilt. "You could be out paying __ or doing __ but instead you're here dropping acid like a teen". Etc etc

See, I already feel the way you're describing (with regard to wasting time doing stupid shit), so I think LSD would just be a nice vacation for me. That's my mindset, and mindset tends to inform the trip, right?

Thanks for sharing user,
Out of curiosity, did you do it with a specific purpose or was it more a recreational kind of thing? Also, if you can, what was the setting like? A party? Nature? Home?

Yes it does. I kind of regret posting that because if you hadn't had that thought already, you might hang onto it and then it'll resurface when you're mid-trip. It goes without saying that you should prob get a trip sitter this time around, JUST to make sure things go smoothly.

I can be even-keeled when I want to be, so it shouldn't be a problem. Thanks for your response.

>did you do it with a specific purpose or was it more a recreational kind of thing
Kind of. I mean...I've been trying to get my hands on some for years just to see what its like. But I can't go much harder than shrooms because my conditions will start getting fucky.

My sister micro-doses in her tea every morning and she said that it'd help with all of the things I've got going on. It probably would have if I...maybe if I was in a better head space.

We had company over this Christmas, and even though they're our best friends of like....6 years+, I still haven't told them about any of this. So even in the moment when I was going through it, I had to keep track of the shit I was saying so I wouldn't spill the beans prematurely. We were at home though. Tried watching Bobs Burgers to calm down but you'd be surprised how often the camera zooms in on Louise yelling loudly. One of our friends was a regular and she kept things as light as she could but it got to the point where I couldn't even stand up off the couch. It was raw sensory overload. I couldn't process everything that was going on. I felt overwhelmed, but I couldn't actually talk about any of it so I just had to sit there and keep checking my reality over and over again. I do that often enough IRL so it felt like my normal self just got kicked into overdrive for about an hour or so.

Maybe you should actually have read the thread and my follow ups posts in here.

To sum it upwe have all been supportive from the fucking start and actually believe it could have been a good business and that it would have been profitable. But the years went by and nothing but misery actually happened like all the things I posted on that threat, which happened multiple times. She works herself to death from Monday to Monday and she never makes any profit to help even herself. She has no fucking tetiment fund because she can't pay it and had to rely on my and my father money to go by a lot of times. I agve her everything I had because I believed in her but the business is obviously not going anywhere. There's not a single day she doesn't get home angry, upset or depressed because of her work. Shit is awful to see.
She works so much and gets stressed so often it has been affecting her health.

I don't give a fuck about the money, I want her well and I want her out if that fucking place. I would prefer to sustain her while she did fucking nothing for the rest of my life than actually see her going back there one more day.

She is really bad at managing money and most of her profit losses are due her being sued and loosing a shitload of money during the process and because her other business partner stole from her but she can't prove it, or at least it is what I have been told.

Regardless of the reasons and want her out if there because that shit has brought nothing but misery to her and the entire family but she is too attached to that place. I kinda get it was her dream but that shit is running her, killing her financially and destroying her health

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I see. Yes if you have some conditions is better you stay away from hallucinogens.
I don't know if you are aware of all the research that's been going on regarding PTSD and MDMA. I mean, done with a professional and with the sole purpose of helping, not as a recreational drug. The success rate is like 4 times higher than any other therapy. Just saying.

maps.org/research/mdma

"Preliminary studies have shown that MDMA in conjunction with psychotherapy can help people overcome PTSD, and possibly other disorders as well. MDMA is known for increasing feelings of trust and compassion towards others, which could make an ideal adjunct to psychotherapy for PTSD"

>I would prefer to sustain her while she did fucking nothing for the rest of my life than actually see her going back there one more day.
Would that help have fine print too?
It's entirely possible that the reason shes depressed is because of the failing business. Or it could be because she feels totally alone in the face of failure without a support net behind her full of unconditional assistance. Ending the business would only solve half of the problem. And she'd most likely blame you guys for it afterwards, not for not giving her enough money to make it work but because she felt like you thought she was a failure the entire damn time.

Funny enough I actually tried MDMA too, a few years back. But this was before I was able to actually accept that I had PTSD in the first place. I was in denial for about 5 years.

That one...was ok I guess. Condition wise it felt like it didn't harm or help in particular. Just started talking A LOT. Like A LOT a lot. Told one of my friends what I felt was my entire life story but in the end just ended up being broad strokes. But god, that come down is fucking horrific. Someone called it seratonin something? It was awful though. Enough to make me swear off the drug entirely. I never want to feel that feeling again. Dementor shit but times a thousand. I can definitely see how it'd help me talk about some stuff though. If I was talking to the right person I probably would've gotten further. But I have "trust issues" apparently.

yeah man, come down is bad. But I was thinking if I did it now I'd pile up on benzos (or any other chilling meds) and free days and use the pills to sleep as much as I can for 3 or 4 days. After that it's back to normal.

>Or it could be because she feels totally alone in the face of failure without a support net behind her full of unconditional assistance.

She has been like this for years and the family has been nothing but supportive. We all changed our lives to help her out but in the end nothing fucking worked. One can only be supported for so long and I'll not let my mom keep going on this suicidal task of mantianing a dead business afloat while she kills herself in the process.

If she closes that place I'll even help her find something new to do in line with that business, like working in a restaurant and making events, which she already does to help support the other business, but her current business got to go.

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I wonder if the recovery time gets longer as you get older. It was about 3 days for me to feel "normal" too but if I were to try this as part of therapy now would that part of it be even worse? Might be psyching myself out lol.

>She has been like this for years
She's had this failing business for years. And how long have you had this attitude towards her/it?
>We all changed our lives to help her out
You don't see how that might make her feel just a tiny bit guilty on top of it all? A failing business, that her family *martyred* themselves for, and now she owes you money and probably a bank or two as well. If she wants to kill herself, its bigger picture than just "a failed business venture".

> turning 27 this summer
> married young (as in teens)
> have good job, 60k+
> wife has great job/college degree, 90k+
> still carrying over debt from our younger years (installment loans, student loans, etc)
> I have over 875k in savings

Part of me wants to "wipe the slate clean" for my wife, but I've seen my uncles and even work friends give their spouse everything, only for their wived to end up taking it for granted. Wife has a hard time supporting me as is (the plan was we would use each other as stepping stones, I'm still waiting on my turn to go to college). I know my wife's not the whole "materialistic cunt" type, i mean:
> she plays vidya
> doesn't go out with chick friends
> wants kids in mid-30s

I don't want to be the first domino to cause a 180 in that, wat do

You're giving her practical solutions to whats very clearly an emotional/psychological problem.
>just close the business
>pay back loans
>get a new job
>problem solved
Except it's not though. Everyone in your household is seeing the true colors of everyone else when things get tough. That usually has consequences.

She will probably need some psychological help of course but that business got to go.

Also
>Everyone in your household is seeing the true colors of everyone else when things get tough. That usually has consequences.

So what I am supposed to do user? Let her kill herself by overworking so much? Should I carry her out of hospital after her joints go to shit? Where exactly do I draw the line ? Also what the hell are you talking about show true colors when things start getting though? It has been thought than than it should ever fucking be for almost a decade and we have been supportive of her since the start but one's got to know when to call the quits to try again later or try something different.

>And how long have you had this attitude towards her/it?

Since the end of last year, I overheard some of her conversations with lawyers and accounts and shit was worse than I thought. I confronted her about it and we talked about and the shit she has and still goes thought. Thankfully she has been expressing the desire of leaving the business for good so I might need just one little push to achieve that. Than we will see what we can do from now on.

I ain't gonna charge any fucking money back from her, she is my mother, and she also doesn't wanna kill herself either l, she is just exhausted of it all and has health and money issues because of it. She lost way too much on her life because of that place but she has a hard time letting it go.

I already told her we need to talk tonight so I am going to wait her to get home and we are going to talk. Probably gonna post results here if the thread is still open.

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Nah, I think if you do it as a part of therapy they must have thought about a way to make the landing easier. I just didn't research that part, but I'm sure it's not hard for professionals to make you skip the come down.

>Honestly, it was luck more than anything else.
You know I don't know where you're supposed to meet people, especially other socially awkward people now that school/uni has been over for a decade for me.

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Just let him know that's how you sincerely feel and whenever these problems come up try and help him do it. Hopefully he'll learn and be able to do it alone, but if he doesn't figure it out then he'll have to figure it out on his own when you leave him.

Partner of 10+ years doesn't want kids. I do. What do.

Pretend to take the pill?

In the same boat, user. I think its just an age thing, by your mid/late 20s most people's social circles have stabilised even more so if they're married and/or have kids. Moved back to my small town, got a job with a small business, and pretty much everyone I work with is married or with kids.