Is it wrong to casually date multiple people and not tell them that you're not being exclusive? It's not just FWB, I do like to take girls out for dinner and dates too. Not super dedicated in finding a long-term partner, but I'm open to the possibility.
My belief is that if you're not BF/GF, you have no obligation to be exclusive to one person or even share these details with others, unless the question comes up at which point you shouldn't lie. Is this the correct way to do it?
>My belief is that if you're not BF/GF, you have no obligation to be exclusive to one person or even share these details with others, unless the question comes up at which point you shouldn't lie. Is this the correct way to do it?
Totally agree
>Is it wrong to casually date multiple people and not tell them that you're not being exclusive?
It's very wrong if it hurts my feeling
Why can't you realized no one could possibly understand the depts of you but me desu..?
purposely withholding information will be viewed as deceit. you dating multiple people and possibly sleeping with them would undoubtedly be relevant information to those the people you are sleeping with as it's a matter of health. some may not want to be with you based on the fact that you're seeing other people.
you don't have to formally announce that you are seeing multiple girls but certainly don't walk on eggshells, ensuring you yourself will never broach the subject.
Personally I think you should disclose the fact that you’re sleeping with other people, purely for their physical safety. You can say “oh I’m safe, I’m tested, I’m using protection” whatever, but if you’re not giving them all the info to decide for themselves whether or not having sec with you is safe for THEM, that’s dishonest and honestly kind of fucked up. And I would say that you should be more concerned about this yourself. You know condoms aren’t 100% effective, right? You know most people don’t use them for oral and anal right? And that people lie? Personally I have ZERO interest in sleeping with someone that is sleeping with other people and I’d be PISSED if I found out that information after the fact.
Please love me only.
Its a bit assholey but as long as you don't tell the girls they are special or do things that are definitely boyfriend/girlfriend things then you are kinda cheating
Why the hell would you need someone else when I could give all my love to you in the first place...?
Am I not beautiful enough for you?
I'm so sorry I bothered you with my existence :'(
Found the roasties
>or do things that are definitely boyfriend/girlfriend things
What are these?
>My belief is that if you're not BF/GF, you have no obligation to be exclusive to one person or even share these details with others, unless the question comes up at which point you shouldn't lie. Is this the correct way to do it?
That is the belief of any mature, experienced adult who understands that while you should aim for basic respect/courtesy, it is no one's job to have to anticipate/protect your feelings when you're still relative strangers. Should you be honest? Absolutely. Is it your job to tell them if they don't ask? No.
OP did nothing wrong.
>That is the belief of any mature, experienced adult
In my opinion, that’s the belief of someone in their early 20s trying desperately to transition from a teenager into an adult. I don’t think you need to date multiple people like you’re shopping for things at the supermarket.
if my girlfriend told me that she was also dating other people while we were dating, I'd drop her
obviously, I'm just one of many and as soon as the next best choice comes along, I'm disposable
Did you even read what I said, dipshit? I’m advocating for people to be upfront about how many people they are sleeping with to everyone that they may be sleeping with, so that everyone involved can make an informed decision. This is actually a matter of public health.
You're not wrong but I would immediately stop dating someone if I realized they were dating other people. I guess the real issue here would be that you are wasting some people's time because you don't want to tell them you really don't give a shit about them and are just having fun and you know that if you were upfront about this, you'd have a lot less dates.
In my mind, you're like a tranny. You technically don't have the obligation to just let everyone know you have a dick even though you appear to be a woman but it's a dick move and bound to piss someone off when they find out.
>roastie hates it when her fuck buddies squirt red hot gonorrhoea down her gaping maw
Just throw some antibiotics on your Cheerios and stop being such a bitch about it
Emotional stuff, talking about everything, sharing intimate things and secrets, deeply caring, gazing into each others eyes for a long time, implying you love each other, super long cuddling, all those things that make your heart jump
I did this for a while and it’s a lot of fun. You’re going to grow out of it in a few years so just enjoy it.
> I don’t think you need to date multiple people like you’re shopping for things at the supermarket.
Up to you.
All I can say is that I'm 32 and dated all through my 20s until meeting my fiancee at 30. It was my experience that people that strictly explore one prospect at a time are nearly nonexistent, and that you'll find yourself constantly the one without a chair when the music stops if you're your energies into one person at a time when everyone else isn't.
> you are wasting some people's time because you don't want to tell them you really don't give a shit about them and are just having fun
Whoa wtf? Just because someone is seeing multiple people doesn't mean they're not serious. Who says you can't explore multiple prospects until you settle on one?
>Emotional stuff, talking about everything, sharing intimate things and secrets, deeply caring, gazing into each others eyes for a long time, implying you love each other, super long cuddling, all those things that make your heart jump
Reading it got me so moody mood
You aren't serious about any particular person though. You are just going around dating and banging random things until one sticks. Most problems start with a lack of understanding and what you need to understand is that there are people who will only date one person at a time and will feel betrayed or just plain angry to find out you've been dating 5 other people at the same time.
I'm one of those people. The people who are like you would probably understand and not have an issue if you told them. The others would. To me, it's such an issue that if I found out you were dating more than one person a year into our relationship, I would at least reconsider the entire thing.
if I found out you were dating more than one person when we first started dating*
Been there done that. I dated two girls at the same time. I got along with girl B better than girl A and I chose to cut all ties with girl A. Girl B became my gf.
Like it's doable OP, but if you ever commit to one of em, you gotta cut ties with the other(s) or else you'll stir a hornet's nest.
>You aren't serious about any particular person though.
I disagree. If I'm looking for a meaningful relationship and have strong interest in multiple people at the same time, I see no reason why exploring the prospects with both means I'm any less serious about finding my person than the person who only dates one at a time.
>I'm one of those people. The people who are like you would probably understand and not have an issue if you told them. The others would.
And that's fine. But then it's YOUR responsibility to be upfront about those expectations from the get go. If you sit there going on multiple dates with someone just assuming that they're not seeing someone else and don't ask knowing how important it is to you, that's your fault.
It's not the job of someone who is a relative stranger (which, let's be clear, someone is when you've still literally only spent a few hours/days/weeks in their company) to have to be disclosing their personal life to you or be preemptive about protecting your feelings. That's on you at that stage.
Your beliefs don't matter when you hurt other people's feelings. Having your beliefs is fine, but humans will respond in human ways and you won't protect yourself or others from it simply by harboring a certain belief. Even if the other person shares your belief, deep inside our emotions will betray our true nature.
Basically, I'd say be careful and be aware that what you do can affect others, which in turn could affect yourself. Unfortunately, emotions trump logic.