How long should I wait to bring up weird kinky shit in a relationship? Him and I have already had sex several times but I'm interested in a lot of bdsm shit and idk how to bring that up and when I should do it
How long should I wait to bring up weird kinky shit in a relationship...
It sounds like you've never done this before, so take it slow.
Yeah I haven't cuz idk how to bring this up with my dates. Especially because it would be femdom and that's more unusual
So, take it slow. Joining BDSM themed communities could help, but as with everything, take the advice with a grain of salt.
Don't rush, don't try too much too soon, start small and don't do dangerous shit.
Yeah ok. Thanx dude
Watch some movies/anime/whatever with him that features that kind of stuff so you can offhandedly mention it. For femdom, why not watch Wolf of Wall Street. There's a scene where the main character is being dommed by a female. You could try to imply you'd like to do that to him when that scene comes up.
Huh never thought about that. That's a good idea actually because I don't have to bring it up out of nowhere haha
You have to have sex first, then just talk about it
like afterwards?
I have chronic nerve damage. 9 years now.
I've associated pain with pleasure at this point. Full blown masochist. When my girlfriend and I were having sex one time she was ontop of me. I took her hand and pushed it into where my nerve damage is. Looked into her eyes. And said "hurt me and fuck me". She's such a good girl.. giving me exactly what I like.
Sooner is better
Not a bad plan, pillow talk is a good place to bring it up, then you can refer to that conversation in future discussions as a starting point, you know, "so about what we talked about last night..."
Ugh see I'm into that. I probably would never go so far in real life but I'd a full blown sadist and I want terribly to hurt a guy in both sexual and nonsexual ways. I'll probably never get there though because most guys don't even like light femdom much less a girl actually hurting them
femdom isn't thaaat rare. well gentle femdom isn't that rare. actual femdom I guess you're right.
Don't confuse "Domination" with "Sadism".
The problem with femdom is girls always seem to want to keep going and going and going
Hell, that's a problem with dom in general, everyone always gotta push that shit into dinner and shit. Fuck off bitch I just wanna eat my pasta, you crazy fucken cunt
As long as you can establish and maintain your own boundaries on it I'd imagine you could talk someone into compromise-- just don't turn into every fucking D and start trying to push it into every aspect of their life, yeah?
Yeah guys are cool with you sitting on their face but I imagine taking out a strap on will deter most of them
I like both
I wouldn't take it out of the bedroom. Not interested in a bdsm "lifestyle" or whatever but in a perfect world I'd have it pretty extreme in the bedroom
>I like both
I know, but the user I was replying to (and your post) equate Dom with Sadist.
>'ll probably never get there though because most guys don't even like light femdom much less a girl actually hurting them
Hurting them is not Dom, it's Sadist. Be careful with what you call what. THe clearer the communication, the better. And if you want to get into kinky sex, you need to be clear about your words.
Yeah I know there's a distinction. But pain is involved in a lot of bdsm so I'd just be clear about what exactly I mean. Idk how much people usually "like to be hurt" to be honest? I know how much I'd like to hurt a man, like where the stopping points are, but idk what guys feel about that shit
>but idk what guys feel about that shit
Yeah, it's a tought talk. There's no manual to break it to your partner, so you'll have to feel around and make do.
Yeah. Well it'll happen sooner or later
stick a finger in his ass midfuck and see what happens