Should i give up on her?

Nathaniel Brooks
Nathaniel Brooks

should i give up on her?
been crushing on this patrician qt for a while, and saw her a lot at shows but only really said hi and thats it. finally pulled the trigger and started dming her. we've been talking a good amount for the past 2-3 days and today she posted an insta story saying "who wants to be my valentine ill give you a chocolate strawberry" or some shit. I replied to it and got back "Hahaha" and then she continued with the convo we were having. i genuinely like this girl bc of her interests (shes in the same small music scene as me and i see her like every other show) but i dont know what to do.
seeing her this saturday at a show. how should i act? confident and persistent or should i not even waste my time and get more emotionally invested (what im scared of the most)
so, what do

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Liam Allen
Liam Allen

You like a girl but do nothing to confidently act on your attraction.

She's probably smart enough to have noticed your feelings a long time ago.

Every day that you fail to make a confident move, you come off as a wimp.

The most optimistic advice I can give you is to make up for lost time and ask her out with no room for misinterpretation. More realistically though, I think you need to get ready to accept the loss here and make a real action plan about how to improve your romantic confidence. Consider that from my viewpoint you sound like someone who would make a meek and disappointing partner.

Alexander Adams
Alexander Adams

Considering she can only "rave" until 4 or 4:30? Don't bother with her until she's spending her Sunday mornings at an after-hours doing bumps of K in the men's bathroom with strangers.

Also, you're supposed to buy a water bottle once and refill it in the bathroom sink throughout the night. That's the only advice I'll give you.

Lucas Allen
Lucas Allen

she isnt into u bro, the story and reply are obvious signs.
i know u might think it's still possible, but she's screaming for attention with that story so she doesn't consider u a candidate

Evan Jenkins
Evan Jenkins

ahah how do I find a qt rave gf in the US? this was the closest I was gonna get but clearly it isn't gonna work

yeah, was thinking about how she would make something so clearly attention wanting as her story yet basically ignore me. clearly not into me, good thing I didn't get too emotionally attached. thanks for the straight up answer user

Austin Ward
Austin Ward

What would you describe as a confident move? Not OP btw

John Baker
John Baker

Depends where you are, different cities have different scenes. I'm in Toronto so our scene is pretty big and varied. It also depends on what kind of music you're going out for, is it just casual EDM like Marshmallow? If so I wouldn't bother, those girls aren't worth it.

Go to the events the "veterans" go to, like actual techno events - it'll be an older crowd that's easier to talk to usually. We also have daytime events on Sundays for example, these are really good for socializing with folks so look out for something similar. Find your local Facebook groups, join them and just go out to events that interest you.

Also pick up smoking it's the best way to spark(heh) a conversation. I've made some good friends simply because one of them asked to borrow a lighter. Just go out to have a good time and dance, and don't make it your goal to find a girl. You'll get noticed more if you look like you genuinely enjoy the music (and if you can actually dance).

Samuel Russell
Samuel Russell

I go to underground techno and gabber shows in Brooklyn. the places are literally to the brim with unreal qt goth raver girls. I agree with the smoking thing, have been using that since I got to this city and its been very hit or miss

also the US is fucking pathetic when it comes to K. literally haven't found it at a single place after asking literally everyone in sight for it for months now. finally got a good point out from a guy but the dealer was out :(

Christopher Myers
Christopher Myers

What kind of techno? Guessing industrial or acid if you like gabber. Personally I'm not a fan of gabber but goth raver girls I am.

Just gotta play on the dark humor, all of us who rave usually got some kind of issues. If you can be pessimistic and funny it'll go a long way.

And that sucks about the K, I was trying to make plans to go to Movement but finding anything was a concern. K isn't too hard to find here, granted we also have a decent psytrance scene and they love their K. Maybe try finding an event around you and asking there?

Landon Martinez
Landon Martinez

yeah mostly industrial techno. used to go to most any good relatively underground (as in not marshmello shit ahah) show but once I got into this scene I like it enough to just stick here

and man this might be going off topic but how the fuck do I become funny again, esp with dark humor? I used to literally be the funniest person I knew, was class clown and most sarcastic in high school, everyone loved me there. then I got my first (and to this point, only) gf and the relationship was garbage. once I got to college I just...changed. I wasn't as confident or funny and now its kinda hard to even keep a convo going, obv even harder to crack jokes.
sometimes i think it mightve been all the drugs ive taken at a pretty youngish age (18 or so) but i just dont know what to do. how do i carry a convo out? like after asking basic shit like "where are u from" i just run out of things to say and just go blank. at this point i just kinda move on and do my own thing. looking back this is exaclty what ive done to this girl lmao, ive met her like 4 times and each time i just say one or two things really confidently and then run out of things to say so instead of being awkward i literally just act cold and walk away or glance away and look for an out. was introduced to this girl the other day again by another friend (she didnt know that we hadnt met yet) and my crush goes "oh haha we met before, you probably/might not remember me though". i laugh and say we did meet, proceed to ask her some questions and talk to her about some artists, then go blank and go back to talking to my friend as the qt reads the signal and turns around to dance with her friends. the entire night i wanted to approach her soooooo fucking bad, she was alone and totally open to being talked to, problem was i took an eighth of shrooms and smoked a lot of weed which was not fun at all and i basically missed the chance to do anything becuase of my dumb drug decisions. fuck maybe i need to lean off

Aiden Price
Aiden Price

sorry for the rant lol I needed to get that out

Connor Wilson
Connor Wilson

reddit spacing

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Kevin Butler
Kevin Butler

still using the term "reddit spacing"
user...

Nolan Lewis
Nolan Lewis

1) why the fuck would you just reply with "lmk" instead of something more direct. Lemme know basically tells her "hey if you somehow fail to get chad to notice you maybe I can be your plan B ;]". Because 2) that story isnt for random people, she put it up for the boy she likes in hope she replies.

I don't mean to sound like a cunt but your chats seem like something a friend or family would write. Be more manly, straight up and assertive

Tyler Phillips
Tyler Phillips

Op post some tunes I'm playing soon need 2 stock up on tracks

Cooper Russell
Cooper Russell

wat type of tunes u feelin

Ryan Stewart
Ryan Stewart

Honestly if you like the scene stick to it, its all a judgment free zone as long as you're not into the commercialized garbage ;)

Yeah psychedelics don't help, I usually drop about 60ug to 135ug of acid when I go out and forming coherent sentences becomes a fun time. Then again I almost always mix it with any combination of m, coke, weed and g. Go download some shitty dating apps to practice talking to girls, even just through text. Remember it's a numbers game for you to just practice so expect to get rejected, blocked, or ignored. Oddly enough it's how I met my raver ex, both of us were just fuckin around. The other option is just load yourself up on a bunch of blow and you'll have no problem talking to girls. Most importantly just find a comfortable amount of drugs to do that gives you energy to dance for 10 hours while not making you more socially retarded than you already are.

Not sure what you play but here you go: youtube.com/watch?v=4NJ8VGbz6g0
youtube.com/watch?v=7QPrJa7z12s
youtube.com/watch?v=a5xSxGhlHfc
youtube.com/watch?v=xjCb4CB-hdw
youtube.com/watch?v=8Ty7qiAlI2I

I'm

So

Sorry

A

Few

Line

Breaks

Offended

You

Cooper Nguyen
Cooper Nguyen

wow damn, yeah actually thanks a lot for that, i def need to just...practice. i don't really know the "game" works bc my first gf i met irl and desu my texts sound like complete and utter shit. gonna download tinder soon and just go for it

this girl might come out with me and my roomie (hes the one who introduced me to her but he doesnt talk to her at all, they just go to the same school) on saturday and i told her there would be coke. gunna load up and be as confident as possible as a last ditch effort. if it doesnt work out after saturday ill ditch it entirely

also based taste heres my fav tune album:
youtube.com/watch?v=vs1QhRf1juU&list=PLnNUvoBKPQgzl3N86bNKmCGAotUk7ZNtn

Jonathan Ross
Jonathan Ross

either shit like this

youtube.com/watch?v=NL1FrNcEHwQ

or like this

youtube.com/watch?v=SYqZI2do7xM

cheers lad

Lincoln Scott
Lincoln Scott

It'll help, throughout University I was such a social outcast. Didn't talk to anyone other than my friends from high school. Then first job out of school was a small startup where I basically worked from home 99% of the time. Went and worked at a large corp after and learned about the importance of networking, both for work and relationships. If you're still in school don't sweat about it too much, you're still learning.

Now I'm a high functioning degenerate with a career

Brody Gray
Brody Gray

Whoops, posted early by accident its fucking 3am and I gotta be up early. Maybe not so high functioning after all.

Last piece of advice that worked for me was look at it less like a game, but rather something you just gotta learn to do as you get older. It'll help build confidence because you can focus on making genuine connections with people regardless if you wanna fuck them or not. Good luck man, I think you'll be fine in time - just remember we usually gotta fail a bit before we learn.

Judging by the 2nd track you might like this artist - he really needs some more recognition:
youtube.com/watch?v=f8gnBuLasX4
youtube.com/watch?v=MfN57sFEcyc
youtube.com/watch?v=vGxBUQq4HdI
youtube.com/watch?v=Q0IVnCGDjOg
youtube.com/watch?v=TDI2Y2tkGkI
youtube.com/watch?v=BSSCmJmnVfY
youtube.com/watch?v=BndnjhmaJ6M

Jordan Ward
Jordan Ward

more recognition? he is one of the top names in the lo-fi house movement. he's about as popular as he should be imo, playing shows, touring and shit. loose legs such a tune i can't lie

Luke Wood
Luke Wood

Yeah just a bit more, I want him to get some more so he can get his ass over to Toronto and play here - I'm just trying to do my part to speed that up. I asked him to stop here during his NA tour in the summer and he teased me with a maybe. I'll be satisfied when that happens.

But since you already knew him here's some other tunes that I'll play with his:
youtube.com/watch?v=RJWyIoV1qto
youtube.com/watch?v=Ctvkg43jElE
youtube.com/watch?v=9p1f1AknEbQ
youtube.com/watch?v=rAxQrLr52uY

Luke Martin
Luke Martin

thank u friend, just made my tinder account, ill keep what youve said in mind

Sebastian Jenkins
Sebastian Jenkins

Happy to help man, now go fap to some traps and go to bed and worry about it all tomorrow.

Sebastian Nelson
Sebastian Nelson

Demuja is so good

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